Behind The Smile with Ash Butterss

Ashleigh Butterss
  • 5.0 (29)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY
Behind The Smile with Ash Butterss

In a world full of social media promoting "perfect lives", many of us are afraid to show our true authentic selves. The good, the bad and the ugly. Behind the Smile with Ash Butterss is a podcast that aims to reveal the truth that lies behind the masks we wear. After making the decision to get sober in 2020, Ash set out on a mission, quitting her corporate job and diving deeply into the world of self-development and recovery. Her mission is to smash through the stereotype that surrounds addiction and to help people live a fulfilled life connected to their purpose.

  1. Ep 116. Finding Freedom in Fitness, with Niki Kiskiras

    6D AGO

    Ep 116. Finding Freedom in Fitness, with Niki Kiskiras

    In this latest episode, Ash sits down with beauty corporate executive and fitness instructor Niki Kiskiras. Beyond her career achievements, Niki shares her deeply personal journey of self-discovery, overcoming societal expectations, and reclaiming her independence after ending her marriage in her late 20s. Coming from a traditional Greek-Australian background, Niki opens up about the immense shame and fear she faced when making the decision to leave her marriage, a life path she had followed because it was what was “expected.” She reflects on the pressure to present a perfect life while internally feeling lost, the guilt of disappointing her family, and the reality of choosing herself despite cultural norms and external judgment. Ash and Niki explore how fitness became a powerful tool for self-liberation, how her relationships evolved post-divorce, and why she ultimately stepped into a life of authenticity, personal growth, and fearless reinvention. They also discuss Nikki’s decision to freeze her eggs as an act of self-empowerment, navigating grief in unexpected moments, and what it means to truly invest in oneself. The episode highlights are: 00:00 Introduction to Transformation and Authenticity 02:52 Niki's Journey: From Corporate to Fitness Instructor 06:05 The Impact of Family and Cultural Background 08:57 Navigating Life's Challenges and Personal Growth 12:08 Hiding Behind a Smile: The Wedding Photo Story 14:57 The Decision to Separate: Fear and Shame 17:54 Finding Authenticity and Purpose 21:02 The Role of Fitness in Personal Transformation 23:45 Living Consciously: The Relationship with Alcohol 31:05 Navigating Personal Growth and Friendships 36:01 The Journey of Egg Freezing 42:30 Understanding Relationship Needs 52:24 The Reality Behind Social Media 57:31 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life You can connect with Niki Kiskiras on her fitness page Instagram. To access your free guided meditations, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s website⁠ ⁠⁠⁠https://www.ashbutterss.com/free-resources⁠⁠ Follow and connect with Ash on:  ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠  ⁠⁠TikTok ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Facebook ⁠ ⁠Website⁠ ⁠

    1 hr
  2. Ep 115. It’s Never Too Late to Start Over, with Belinda Stark

    MAR 23

    Ep 115. It’s Never Too Late to Start Over, with Belinda Stark

    In this episode, Ash sits down with Alcohol and Midlife Coach, Belinda Stark, who shows that it’s never too late to transform your life after making her own significant changes in her mid-50s. After running a successful fashion business for over a decade, Belinda made the bold decision to change careers, inspired by her own journey of overcoming depression, breast cancer, divorce, and a complex relationship with alcohol. Belinda shares her personal struggles, including postnatal depression and hospitalisation after the birth of her second son, the moment she realised alcohol was no longer serving her, and how she finally found the courage to step into sobriety. She reflects on the tools that helped her along the way, the challenges of reprogramming deep-seated beliefs, and the incredible shifts she has experienced in her relationships, self-esteem, and overall happiness. Ash and Belinda also discuss the importance of self-compassion, navigating midlife reinvention, and why it’s never too late to make a change. The episode highlights are: 00:00 Introduction to Transformation and Resilience 02:39 Belinda Stark: A Journey of Courage 08:28 Hiding Behind the Smile: The Struggles Within 18:02 Childhood Influences and Early Habits 22:50 The Turning Point: Acknowledging Alcoholism 26:36 Facing Breast Cancer: A Life-Altering Diagnosis 30:09 Overcoming Health Challenges 33:08 The Role of Mindset in Recovery 35:16 The Journey to Sobriety Begins 39:39 Tapering vs. Cold Turkey: Finding What Works 40:59 Navigating Social Situations Sober 47:27 Tools for Sustaining Sobriety 49:02 Transforming Relationships Through Sobriety 53:44 Empowering Change in Midlife 55:53 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life You can connect with Belinda Stark on Instagram or through her website.  To access your free guided meditations, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s website ⁠https://www.ashbutterss.com/free-resources⁠ Follow and connect with Ash on:  ⁠Instagram⁠  ⁠TikTok ⁠ ⁠Facebook  Website⁠

    58 min

  3. MAR 16

    Ep 114. The True Cost of Success, with Ryan Trainor

    In this latest episode, Ash has a deep and powerful conversation with Ryan Trainor, exploring his transformative journey from a successful entrepreneur to a more authentic and balanced human. They discuss the importance of curiosity, connection, and the need to let go of control in life. Ryan shares his experiences with mental health, the pressures of success, and the impact of childhood on his quest for relevance. The conversation also touches on the use of psychedelics for personal growth and the empowerment that comes from taking responsibility for your relationships and experiences. Ash and Ryan explore the constructs of reality, the importance of community and connection, and the journey of personal growth through challenges. They discuss the need for open conversations, the impact of facing rock bottom, and the transformative power of meditation and mindfulness. The episode highlights are: 00:00 Introduction to Transformation and Authenticity 01:47 Ryan Treanor's Entrepreneurial Journey and Wake-Up Call 03:06 Curiosity and Connection in Life 09:13 Letting Go of Control and Embracing Faith 11:24 Hiding Behind a Smile: The Cost of Success 18:15 Childhood Influences and the Quest for Relevance 24:39 Empowerment Through Responsibility and Relationships 27:19 Exploring Psychedelics and Personal Growth 32:04 The Constructs of Reality 34:06 Defining Our Avatars 36:25 The Need for Connection 37:51 Navigating Community and Authenticity 40:13 The Power of Open Conversations 44:20 Facing Rock Bottom 49:32 Meditation and Mindfulness 53:25 Shifting Desires and Values 57:16 Creating Meaningful Memories 01:00:14 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life You can connect with Ryan Trainor on Instagram or LinkedIn. Listen to Ash and her dad’s episode on Trainable here. To access your⁠⁠⁠ free guided meditations⁠⁠⁠, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s website Follow and connect with Ash on:  ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠  ⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok ⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook ⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠

    1h 3m
  4. Ep 113. Navigating Divorce in Sobriety, with Kath Elliott

    MAR 9

    Ep 113. Navigating Divorce in Sobriety, with Kath Elliott

    In this episode, Ash welcomes back a friend of the show, Kath Elliott, an alcohol mindset coach now entering her sixth year of sobriety. Kath returns to share openly about her recent experience of navigating divorce in sobriety.  Kath discusses the fears that held her back, and how she ultimately made the decision to choose herself. Ash and Kath go on to discuss the emotional rollercoaster of grief, self-discovery, and learning to sit with discomfort, and how Kath found clarity through sobriety.  The ladies also explore dating sober, redefining wealth beyond finances, and the power of stepping into life’s unknowns with courage. If you’ve ever questioned whether staying is harder than leaving, or if you’re afraid of what’s on the other side of a massive life transition—this episode is for you. The episode highlights are: 00:00 Welcome Back: A Familiar Face 03:08 Navigating Life Changes: Grief and Divorce 05:55 The Decision to Separate: A Journey of Intuition 08:49 The Impact of Sobriety on Relationships 11:57 Children and Separation: A Delicate Balance 14:52 Redefining Success: Lessons from Marriage 18:02 Embracing the Unknown: The Power of Self-Love 20:52 Facing Fears: Financial and Emotional Challenges 24:09 The Journey of Dating Sober 26:54 Wealth Beyond Money: Redefining Abundance 30:06 Looking Ahead: Love and New Beginnings 33:08 Non-Negotiables for an Authentic Life You can connect with Kath Elliot on Instagram or through her website. To access your⁠⁠ free guided meditations⁠⁠, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s website Follow and connect with Ash on:  ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠  ⁠⁠⁠TikTok ⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Facebook ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Website⁠

    43 min
  5. Ep 112. From Reality Star to Rock Bottom and Recovery, with Davey Lloyd

    MAR 2

    Ep 112. From Reality Star to Rock Bottom and Recovery, with Davey Lloyd

    In this episode of Behind the Smile, Ash is joined by former reality TV star Davey Lloyd, who you might recognise from shows including The Bachelorette and Bachelor in Paradise. Now a builder living in Sydney, Davey opens up about his struggles with addiction which took him to the brink of death after overdosing in 2023.  In this candid conversation, Davey shares his harrowing journey through addiction, a life-threatening seizure, and the path he is now on in recovery. He reflects on the moments that led to his near-death experience, the emotional turmoil that followed, and the transformative power of rehabilitation. Davey discusses the importance of self-discovery, the challenges of maintaining sobriety, and his commitment to helping others facing similar struggles.  This interview is as raw and unfiltered as it gets.  The episode highlights include: 03:02 Valentine's Day Reflections and Sobriety 06:04 Daily Life and Struggles with Motivation 08:57 Understanding Addiction and Mental Health 11:58 The Impact of Childhood on Adult Behavior 14:49 The Burden of Shame and Guilt 18:05 Living Amends and Personal Growth 21:02 The Slow Process of Recovery 23:46 Learning to Connect Authentically 27:09 The Reality of Hair Loss and Substance Abuse 28:58 The Overdose Experience and Its Aftermath 32:31 The Turning Point: A Life-Altering Experience 39:06 Confronting Addiction: The Aftermath of a Seizure 48:35 Rehabilitation: A Journey of Self-Discovery 55:08 Finding Balance: Life After Rehab 01:01:15 Looking Ahead: Writing a Memoir and Advocacy You can connect with Davey Lloyd on Instagram here.  To access your⁠ free guided meditations⁠, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s website Follow and connect with Ash on:  ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠  ⁠⁠TikTok ⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Facebook ⁠ ⁠Website⁠

    1h 5m
  6. Ep 111. Solo Episode: How I Made It To 5 Years Sober!

    FEB 23

    Ep 111. Solo Episode: How I Made It To 5 Years Sober!

    In this special solo episode of Behind the Smile, Ash Butterss marks a huge milestone—five years of sobriety. Reflecting on her journey from rock bottom to a life beyond her wildest dreams, Ash shares the raw truth about what it really takes to break free from addiction and step into a life of clarity, peace, and purpose. From walking into rehab convinced she’d learn to “drink like a lady” to realising she needed to create an entirely new life, Ash opens up about the lessons, struggles, and profound shifts that have shaped her over the last five years. She talks about overcoming shame, rebuilding self-trust, and learning to surrender to something bigger than herself. If you’re navigating your own transformation, whether in sobriety or any other area of life, this episode is filled with wisdom, hope, and a powerful reminder that real change happens one small step at a time. The episode highlights are: 00:00 Celebrating Five Years of Sobriety 02:55 Reflecting on the Journey to Recovery 06:10 The Transformation of Life Post-Rehab 09:00 Understanding the Roots of Addiction 11:55 The Role of Self-Discovery in Sobriety 15:11 Building a New Life After Addiction 17:57 The Importance of Community and Support 20:55 Facing Challenges in Early Sobriety 23:45 The Shift in Perspective on Alcohol 26:48 Embracing Change and Growth 30:03 The Power of Small Steps in Recovery 32:57 Finding Freedom in Sobriety 36:12 A Message of Hope and Encouragement The episode I referenced is called: Ep 61. Impulsivity, genetics and the science of addiction with Aaron Thomas To access your free guided meditations, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s website. Follow and connect with Ash on:  ⁠Instagram⁠  ⁠TikTok ⁠ ⁠Facebook  Website⁠

    40 min
  7. Ep 110. The Truth About Healing at 20+ Years Sober, with Dean Beattie

    FEB 16

    Ep 110. The Truth About Healing at 20+ Years Sober, with Dean Beattie

    In the latest episode of Behind the Smile, host Ash speaks with Dean Beattie, a longevity coach who’s overcome his own struggles with addiction. Having been sober for over 20+ years now, Dean shares candidly about the challenges he’s faced in recovery including healing his relationship with his family, overcoming financial fears and forming healthy intimate relationships.  He reflects on the role of validation in his life and how he found the strength to get sober at the age of 28, ultimately transforming his life through the 12-step program and mindfulness practices. Dean also discusses the impact of grief, the role of therapy, and the significance of support systems for men. He also highlights the need for authentic connections and the benefits of holistic practices like yoga.  The episode highlights are: 00:00 Behind the Smile: Introduction to Authenticity 05:05 Dean's Journey: From Addiction to Recovery 10:09 The Impact of Childhood on Addiction 14:52 The Role of Validation and Intimacy in Addiction 20:05 The Turning Point: Getting Sober at 28 25:08 The Transformation: Life After Recovery 29:28 Taking Ownership and Finding Peace 31:17 Navigating Grief and Loss 34:33 The Role of Therapy and Healing Modalities 37:15 Confronting Temptations and Living Authentically 40:30Making Amends and Family Dynamics 43:45 Men's Mental Health and Support Systems 46:34The Impact of Role Models on Men 48:26 Yoga: A Path to Connection and Healing 52:36 The Men's Reboot Program: A Holistic Approach You can connect with  Dean Beattie on Instagram here or through his website here. To access your free guided meditations, head to the Freebie Page on Ash’s website Follow and connect with Ash on:  ⁠Instagram⁠  ⁠TikTok ⁠ ⁠Facebook  Website⁠

    59 min
  8. Ep 109. 100 Days To Change Your Life, with Sober Flourish Founder Jodi Clark

    FEB 10

    Ep 109. 100 Days To Change Your Life, with Sober Flourish Founder Jodi Clark

    In this week’s episode, Ash sits down with Jodi Clark, a business mentor and alcohol-free coach, to discuss her journey towards sobriety and self-discovery. Jodi shares how it was actually a 100-day weight-loss challenge that motivated her to go alcohol free, yet after seeing the positive impact it had on her mental health and relationships, she decided to stay sober for good. In this conversation, Jodi shares her transformative journey towards sobriety, discussing the profound impact it has had on her self-esteem, relationships, and overall quality of life. Along her journey, Jodi has built a community supporting other women to go alcohol free and reflects openly on the challenges of balancing work and family life while pursuing her passion for helping others. Jodi also highlights the significance of vulnerability and authenticity in her journey, encouraging listeners to embrace their own paths to wellness. The episode highlights are: 00:00 Introduction to Jodie Clark and Her Journey 02:56 Daily Life and Finding Joy in Work 06:03 Setting Intentions for the New Year 08:58 Hiding Behind a Smile: Jodie's Photo Reflection 11:59 The Impact of Alcohol on Jodie's Life 15:02 The Turning Point: A Hundred Day Challenge 17:57 The Journey to Sobriety and Self-Discovery 26:58 Transformative Journey: The Impact of Sobriety 33:12 Building Self-Esteem Through Sobriety 39:04 Creating a Supportive Community: SoberFlourish 45:05 Navigating Life's Challenges: Balancing Work and Family 51:02 Embracing Vulnerability: Lessons from the Journey You can connect with Jodi Clark onInstagram here. Or on her Sober Flourishwebsite here. To access your free guided meditations, head to theFreebie Page on Ash’s website. Follow and connect with Ash on: ⁠Instagram⁠ TikTok ⁠Facebook Website⁠

    55 min
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    5
    out of 5
    29 Ratings

    About

    In a world full of social media promoting "perfect lives", many of us are afraid to show our true authentic selves. The good, the bad and the ugly. Behind the Smile with Ash Butterss is a podcast that aims to reveal the truth that lies behind the masks we wear. After making the decision to get sober in 2020, Ash set out on a mission, quitting her corporate job and diving deeply into the world of self-development and recovery. Her mission is to smash through the stereotype that surrounds addiction and to help people live a fulfilled life connected to their purpose.

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