ILLUMENATE

Chris Tidrick

ILLUMENATE tells the stories of men with good hearts, open minds, and a desire to make the world better for everyone — not just them and theirs. This podcast will be the real stories of men’s lives — their influences and role models and how they’ve worked to develop themselves. The podcast will be a video interview format, where guests will share their stories, highlighting their backgrounds, the ways they are thriving, the pivotal points along their journey, where they find faith, hope, and belonging, and the places they still struggle. More information at https://illumenate.substack.com/

  1. Episode 2.01: Curiosity, Vulnerability, and Connection with Chris Tidrick

    SEP 18

    Episode 2.01: Curiosity, Vulnerability, and Connection with Chris Tidrick

    In the premier episode of Season 2 of ILLUMENATE, the guest is the host himself, Chris Tidrick. Known for his thoughtful approach to male vulnerability, leadership, and purpose, Chris launched this podcast to explore what it means to be a good man in today’s world. His work—on the mic and on the page—continues to resonate with listeners navigating their own journeys of growth, connection, and authenticity. Chris steps into the spotlight for a rare and revealing conversation. Answering the most frequently asked question from Season One—“When will you do an episode about yourself?”—Chris is interviewed by his very first four guests: Bill Kirst, Jason Kolaczkowski, Steve Walker, and Eddie Francis. Together, they reverse the format and take Chris through an emotional and introspective AMA (Ask Me Anything), followed by the signature Illuminate lightning round. Chris opens up about a fractured relationship with his grandfather that influenced his decades-long departure from the church, and the long, winding path that ultimately brought him back to faith. In a moving exchange, he reflects on the importance of finding a spiritual home that aligns with his values, and how community and curiosity—rather than rigid belief—became central to his worldview. The conversation also explores Chris’s approach to leadership, as he shares a personal story of professional rejection that ultimately reignited his passion for his current role. Through that experience, he found deeper clarity in the kind of leader he wants to be: one who blends empathy with accountability. The episode doesn’t shy away from the hard stuff. Chris gets candid about insecurity, anger, and how social anxiety shaped much of his early life. He also speaks to the profound impact of male friendship and vulnerability, reflecting on what Season One taught him, especially from his guests of color who offered raw insights into what it's like to navigate the world as Black men. The conversation moves with grace from vulnerability to laughter, curiosity to clarity, all centered around one unshakable theme: we are better when we connect, when we ask questions, and when we do the hard work of showing up—together.

    1h 27m
  2. Episode 1.18: Risk, Authenticity, and Legacy with Mel Fenner

    JUL 15

    Episode 1.18: Risk, Authenticity, and Legacy with Mel Fenner

    In this episode of ILLUMENATE, Chris sits down with Dr. Mel Fenner, an HBCU leader, technologist, and community builder whose journey from small-town Mississippi to the heights of higher education leadership is rooted in purpose, authenticity, and service. With over 20 years of experience in IT and a deep belief in mentoring and legacy-building, Mel brings a heartfelt and thoughtful perspective. Mel shares how his drive stems from seeing others grow—whether his own children, younger colleagues, or student employees. He reflects on his early exposure to science and technology, nurtured by supportive parents and rare but transformative opportunities. His career path has taken him from help desk technician to Deputy CIO, including impactful roles at institutions in Mississippi, Florida, North Carolina, and the University of Illinois. Each move required risk, courage, and a strong sense of curiosity. Now at Lincoln University—the first degree-granting HBCU—he brings his wealth of experience to help uplift a historically significant institution. A key theme of this conversation is Mel’s personal deconstruction and growth, especially in embracing his full, authentic self. For years, he felt compelled to wear a professional mask, shaped by internalized pressure and external expectations. But in recent years, particularly during his time at Illinois, Mel found the confidence to lead with his true voice. He credits this shift to both his spiritual growth and his willingness to invest in personal development through reading, reflection, and challenges like 75 Hard. Mel also opens up about the role of community in his life, from his close bond with his sister to the lifelong brotherhood found through Kappa Alpha Psi. He speaks on the importance of male friendships as spaces of accountability and vulnerability, and how he helps make the world a better place by solving problems before they escalate. Ultimately, Mel’s story is one of risk embraced, identity reclaimed, and purpose lived out loud. His life is a testament to the power of intentionality and legacy—and the joy of raising others up along the way. ILLUMENATE is a podcast that tells the stories of men with good hearts, open minds, and a desire to make the world better for everyone — not just them and theirs. More info: https://illumenate.substack.com/about

    42 min
  3. Episode 1.17: Rewriting Masculinity with Joy and Purpose with Ryan Rucker

    JUN 25

    Episode 1.17: Rewriting Masculinity with Joy and Purpose with Ryan Rucker

    In this episode of ILLUMENATE, Chris sits down with the multi-talented Ryan Rucker—a devoted father, children’s book author, game show champion, ice cream entrepreneur, and host of the Courtside Forever podcast. From growing up in small-town upstate New York to building a multifaceted life in California, Ryan shares his remarkable journey of personal growth, identity, and resilience. With warmth and honesty, he reflects on the winding road that brought him to where he is today, embracing every unexpected turn with curiosity and heart.Ryan opens up about how his childhood, shaped by a devoted single mother and a tight-knit community, laid the foundation for his commitment to family. A pivotal move to California as a teenager expanded his worldview, introducing him to new cultures and sparking a broader understanding of identity and community. A surprising turn in high school—theater class—helped him break away from a narrow self-image rooted in athletics and ignited his creative spirit, ultimately influencing his ventures into writing and entrepreneurship.The conversation takes a delightful turn into Ryan's serendipitous path to launching his whimsically named ice cream company, Be Ice Cream or Be Nothing, inspired by a line from Parks and Recreation. His enthusiasm for creating joy through simple pleasures is palpable, and it’s clear that this passion, along with a surprise win on Ellen's Game of Games, helped bring his dream of writing a children's book to life. Is This Your Favorite Ice Cream? captures his love of nostalgia and connection, underscoring the idea that the best moments—and the best ice cream—are shared with the people you love.As the episode progresses, Ryan and Chris explore deeper themes of masculinity, mental health, and vulnerability. Ryan speaks candidly about his personal journey through therapy, the pressures of fatherhood, and his ongoing commitment to showing up authentically in all areas of life. He encourages listeners to embrace their complexity and resist societal pressure to conform to one-dimensional identities. Through his example, Ryan champions a version of modern masculinity rooted in empathy, adaptability, and joy.You can learn more about and connect with this episode’s guest at: https://ryanrucker.com/

    1h 2m
  4. Episode 1.16: Moving from Ally to Accomplice with Mike B

    JUN 11

    Episode 1.16: Moving from Ally to Accomplice with Mike B

    In this episode of ILLUMENATE, Chris sits down with Mike B, a Central Illinois resident, nonprofit executive, flight instructor, and passionate advocate for social justice. Mike shares a deeply personal and reflective journey of growth, shaped by a conservative religious upbringing, transformative educational experiences, and, most profoundly, the influence of his wife. His story is one of deconstruction—of faith, masculinity, and societal norms—and reconstruction into a life defined by intentional activism, vulnerability, and integrity. Mike’s activism took root in 2020 after George Floyd’s murder, when his wife encouraged him to attend an anti-racism workshop. That single experience catalyzed a dramatic shift in his worldview and career path, leading him to found a nonprofit focused on security-sensitive justice work. He shares how passive allyship has become hollow, advocating instead for accompliceship, which involves actively dismantling oppressive systems rather than simply voicing support. Through honest stories from his time at the University of Illinois and his nonprofit leadership, Mike illustrates the nuanced ways he has used his influence and privilege to challenge institutional norms, often at potential personal risk. The conversation also delves into the complexities of male friendship, emotional openness, and the societal limitations placed on men. Mike offers an intimate look at his own struggles with conflict avoidance, emotional suppression, and the importance of feedback as a lifelong learning tool. His reflections on receiving feedback, managing power dynamics, and building authentic relationships provide a roadmap for other men navigating similar paths. He also speaks candidly about the joys and fears tied to his love of flying and the sense of freedom and community he finds in aviation—particularly among LGBTQ+ pilots. Above all, this episode is an invitation to rethink what it means to be a man in today’s world. Mike urges listeners—especially white men—to move beyond passive support and into active engagement with the work of justice. His insights on accountability, emotional growth, and meaningful connection leave a lasting impression, offering both challenge and hope for those committed to evolving in pursuit of a better, more equitable world.

    51 min
  5. Episode 1.15: Redemption, Resilience, and Redefining Purpose with Prince Robertson

    MAY 28

    Episode 1.15: Redemption, Resilience, and Redefining Purpose with Prince Robertson

    In this episode of ILLUMENATE, Chris sits down with Rev. Dr. Prince Robertson, Dean of Students for Inclusion and Advocacy at Illinois Wesleyan University. A minister, educator, author, and father, Dr. Robertson shares an intimate look into the personal and professional journey that has shaped his life. From Harlem to Saginaw to Champaign-Urbana, he weaves a story of grit, growth, and giving back, drawing from his experiences in faith, family, and the academy.Prince’s “why” is firmly rooted in family, faith, and service. He opens up about the cultural shift of moving from the vibrancy of Harlem to the industrial grit of Saginaw, Michigan, and how that transition laid the foundation for the man he would become. His early academic struggles, including failing to graduate on time from high school and later flunking out of college, are shared with raw honesty. Yet it is in these struggles where his resilience shines brightest. Through a mix of divine timing, support networks, and sheer determination, he finds redemption in education—eventually earning advanced degrees and devoting his life to advocating for students who need a second chance, just as he once did.The episode explores what it means to be vulnerable, especially as a Black man, a father, and a leader in higher education. Prince reflects on unlearning toxic expectations of masculinity and replacing them with values that promote authenticity, discipline, and compassion. He offers candid insights into how he raises his sons differently, prioritizing academics and integrity over societal pressures, and how his involvement in community service and theater has become a shared experience with his family. His ability to balance fatherhood, ministry, and student advocacy highlights a model of leadership grounded in humility and love.Listeners will be inspired by Prince’s reflections on friendship, accountability, and the role of community in personal development. He emphasizes the importance of finding people who are just as imperfect as you are—those with whom you can share openly and be held accountable. Above all, he hopes his story serves as proof that redemption is possible and that life’s challenges can be used as catalysts for transformation and purpose.

    1h 3m
  6. Episode 1.14: Lift While You Climb with R Wayne Martin

    MAY 14

    Episode 1.14: Lift While You Climb with R Wayne Martin

    In this episode of ILLUMENATE, Chris sits down with R. Wayne Martin, a platinum-selling music executive, podcast host, and mindset coach whose story is as transformative as the artists he’s helped rise to stardom. Known for mentoring musicians while championing mental wellness, Wayne shares his life journey from a conservative evangelical upbringing in the South during the Civil Rights era to the red carpets of the global music industry. His story is grounded in a powerful personal mission: to lift others as he climbs. Wayne opens up about the seismic moments that reshaped his worldview, from his first taste of creative community in high school theater to experiencing "frisson"—the chills of emotional music connection—that confirmed his calling. He recounts how mentorship in the Nashville music scene helped launch his meteoric rise, earning his first gold record at 21 and his first platinum award by 24. But beneath that professional success ran a current of personal struggle. Wayne candidly details his battle with treatment-resistant depression, which ultimately led him to undergo electroconvulsive therapy (ECT). This life-altering experience not only saved him but inspired him to record his story in a 28,000-word manuscript meant for his adopted daughters. Beyond the music industry, Wayne discusses his ongoing evolution—both personal and spiritual. He talks about deconstructing his early belief systems, embracing Stoic and Buddhist philosophies, and finding power in the act of letting go. One of the episode’s most profound segments explores his redefinition of discipline and self-love, breaking it down into a progression from discipline to consistency, to ritual, and ultimately, habit—a framework he now teaches to his creative clients. Throughout the conversation, Wayne emphasizes authenticity, intentionality, and resilience. Whether describing how he became an impromptu champion for Mary Chapin Carpenter at Columbia Records or reflecting on the emotional cost of being an empath in a demanding industry, Wayne’s insights are filled with hard-won wisdom. He encourages listeners to own their mindset, cherish their joy, and embrace the power of self-reflection as a path to growth. This episode is a masterclass in leading with heart while creating space for others to thrive. You can learn more about and connect with this episode’s guest at: https://www.mthree.online/

    59 min
  7. Episode 1.13: Holding Space for Grief with Nick Gaylord

    APR 30

    Episode 1.13: Holding Space for Grief with Nick Gaylord

    In this episode of ILLUMENATE, host Chris Tidrick sits down with Nick Gaylord, founder and host of the Our Dead Dads podcast. With nearly 30 years in the pharmaceutical industry focused on quality assurance and compliance, Nick spent much of his professional life ensuring the integrity of life-saving medications. Yet, a more personal calling tugged at him—one rooted in pain, introspection, and a desire to connect with others on a human level. After the loss of his father and a period of unemployment, Nick launched a podcast that would give voice to the unspoken and create a safe space for people grappling with grief of all kinds. Nick shares the origin story of Our Dead Dads, born from a mixture of grief and opportunity. He recounts his own turbulent relationship with his father, the relief and complex emotions that followed his passing, and the transformative power of therapy. Through candid reflection, Nick explains how his show evolved from being solely about paternal loss to encompassing all types of grief—divorce, lost jobs, financial ruin, and even estrangement from living family. By offering guests a space to tell their stories without judgment, Nick is not only helping others heal, but also healing himself in the process. Throughout their conversation, Chris and Nick delve into the challenges of starting something meaningful amid fear and self-doubt. Nick discusses the fears he had to overcome—particularly around public speaking and self-worth—as well as the surprising intimacy of podcasting that builds trust between host and guest. He emphasizes the importance of male friendships, authentic communication, and accountability as foundations for emotional resilience. With humor and raw honesty, Nick brings to light the emotional labor involved in holding space for others and the sacred trust that guests place in him. Nick’s mission is clear: to change the world one damaged soul at a time. As he shares his hopes for the future and the lessons he's learned about forgiveness, identity, and personal growth, listeners are reminded that grief, while painful, is universal—and processing it openly can be a powerful act of love, healing, and transformation. This episode is not only a testament to Nick’s journey but a call to all of us to embrace our grief and to support others in doing the same. You can learn more about and connect with this episode’s guest at: Website: www.ourdeaddads.com Contact to be a guest: https://www.ourdeaddads.com/be-a-guest Facebook (personal): https://www.facebook.com/nick.gaylord.50/ Facebook (podcast): https://www.facebook.com/ourdeaddadspod/ Instagram (personal): https://www.instagram.com/nickgphoto_com/ Instagram (podcast): https://www.instagram.com/ourdeaddadspod TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ourdeaddadspod YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ourdeaddadspod ILLUMENATE is a podcast that tells the stories of men with good hearts, open minds, and a desire to make the world better for everyone — not just them and theirs. More info: https://illumenate.substack.com/about

    1h 2m
  8. Episode 1.12: Unmasking the Inner Work with Bobby Kalinowsky

    APR 16

    Episode 1.12: Unmasking the Inner Work with Bobby Kalinowsky

    In this deeply introspective episode of ILLUMENATE, host Chris Tidrick welcomes Bobby Kalinowsky, co-founder of The Emergeré and the creator of Good Grief Men, a transformative platform aimed at encouraging emotional connection among men. Bobby opens up about his personal journey through depression, divorce, and identity deconstruction, leading to a calling that redefines traditional male roles and creates spaces where vulnerability and authenticity are not only welcomed but necessary for growth. Bobby traces the roots of his "why" to the emotionally taxing years of his first marriage—balancing high-stress work as a defense contractor, raising three kids under three, and facing the silent spiral into isolation and depression. His story is a candid exploration of how deeply internalized beliefs about masculinity, stoicism, and self-worth can lead to emotional breakdown. Bobby speaks with raw honesty about the power of therapy, the importance of male emotional connection, and how a simple question—“Are you okay?”—from a friend began his long journey toward healing. Listeners are taken through Bobby's pivotal transformation, including the move to St. Louis to co-found The Emergeré , his experiences in men's groups, and his awakening to the ways shame and societal expectations—especially those rooted in religious and cultural traditions—shape and limit male emotional expression. Bobby's insight into the male psyche is both personal and universal, touching on generational trauma, emotional intelligence, and the internalized labels that hold men back from being fully present in their relationships. Throughout the episode, Bobby and Chris discuss everything from fatherhood and second chances in marriage to the importance of male friendship and the healing potential of open, honest conversations. Whether it’s leaning into difficult emotions like anger or rediscovering joy through family, Bobby's story is a compelling call to action for men to engage in deeper self-awareness and compassionate relationships. His journey is a testament to the power of showing up, even when it’s messy, and choosing connection over isolation. Learn more about and connect with Bobby at: Instagram: @goodgriefmen Threads: @goodgriefmen ILLUMENATE is a podcast that tells the stories of men with good hearts, open minds, and a desire to make the world better for everyone — not just them and theirs. More info: https://illumenate.substack.com/about

    50 min

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
5 Ratings

About

ILLUMENATE tells the stories of men with good hearts, open minds, and a desire to make the world better for everyone — not just them and theirs. This podcast will be the real stories of men’s lives — their influences and role models and how they’ve worked to develop themselves. The podcast will be a video interview format, where guests will share their stories, highlighting their backgrounds, the ways they are thriving, the pivotal points along their journey, where they find faith, hope, and belonging, and the places they still struggle. More information at https://illumenate.substack.com/

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