Finding Serenity in the Midst of Chaos Dr. Tülay Massey

Who Do You Think You Are?

If you are like most people, your answer will be along the lines of: 

I am a mum

I am an entrepreneur

I am a manager

I am an engineer

I am a director of...

I am a scientist

I am a [insert job title]

...

There lies the problem. When you are asked who you are, you often describe what you do! not who you are.

Join today's conversation to discover why this is so detrimental to you as a person both in your career and in your life!

Have you ever stopped working for a minute or looked up from your phone, to consider how balanced your life is right now? Yes, really, have you?

When is the last time you took a break from ‘doing things and going through the motions of daily activities in autopilot and had a good look at yourself; your life and how things are going?

If you are listening to this podcast, it means that there is a part of you who believes that there are some areas of your life that are not working as they should. The good news is, I have just thing for you!

You can now discover how balanced your life is in 7 essential areas with my FREE Life Balance Workbook!

Just go to: https://www.tulaymasseycoaching.com/thelifebalanceworkbook-podcast

and download this workbook for absolutely FREE now!

As a child, you probably heard a few times: ‘I want doesn’t get’ or ‘I want never gets’, especially if you were raised in Great Britain.

You were probably also explained that the reason for this was that ‘you have to ask for things in a more polite way and say I would like, may I please have etc. It's often used with children when they ask for things in, what is interpreted as, a rude way.

And the chances are your 5-year-old self took this as ‘I mustn’t ask for what I want’.

Unfortunately, as you grow older this deep-seated belief shows up in many aspects of your life without you even realising it. I want this, but I can’t ask for it.

This little phrase ‘I want never gets’ used to really trigger me and I used to tell people ‘If you don’t ask you don’t get’!

But most recently I had a whole new perspective on this. As I understand more and more about our brain, our thoughts and how they create our reality I realised something really ground-breaking!

The truth is ‘I want’ does NOT get you what you want, because you don’t believe in it. You don’t believe you deserve the thing you want. This is one of the main reasons you hide behind ‘I don’t know what I want’. What you are really saying is that ‘I don’t believe I deserve it, what I want is impossible, I am afraid I won’t get it, I am afraid I might lose it!’

And here is the bombshell: I want doesn’t get you want, because in your mind I want = I don’t have it.

Which means you are still focused on NOT HAVING it! As you already know, what you focus on, grows within you.

So how do you get what you want in life?

The simple answer is: Focus on ‘already having it’.

You might be thinking: ‘How can I focus on something I don’t have? How can I pretend I have it?’…

Well, you do this all day long, without even realising.

Think about all the ‘unwanted’ scenarios that you create in your mind when you fear something when you are uncertain about the outcome? They are not true, have not yet happened, but you create/go through every detail in your mind as if it were true.

If you can do that about something negative/unwanted, you sure can do that about something you want. It is like daydreaming, something you have the innate ability to do so and yes something you believe you must stop doing, because it is not good for you (told the teachers when you were 5. 6. 7 etc.)

How do you get what you want in life? Knowing what you want and BE-ing who/what you want before you even have it. If you want to find out more exactly how to do that… just book a clarity call with me now using the link below:

https://calendly.com/tulaymasseycoaching/30min

Happy New Year!How have you been?If you are like most people you might be going into the New Year full steam ahead: New Year, New Me, New Goals... etc.🛑 STOP!You and I both know that going into the new year full steam ahead with new goals, aspirations etc. never really works...because 80% of people with new year's resolutions flop and fall off the wagon by week 3 (more on the reasons for that later).Just consider for a moment, is this really what you need right now?Is this the thing that is going to serve you best?You see, your brain will seek comfort, safety, familiarity just as soon as it perceives danger (change, new goals, overdrive etc.).and it will drive you towards behaviours that will find that comfort and perceived safety...whether that is overeating, drinking, overworking or altogether avoiding what needs attention.So why not do yourself a favour today and ask yourself: 'What do I really need right now?'🤔 - we talked about this in Episode 22.

Then ask yourself who do I need to be, what do I need to change that is manageable so that I can achieve it?

This Episode talks about why you fail most of your goals and why you should stop setting new year's resolutions!

Have you ever stopped working for a minute or looked up from your phone, to consider how balanced your life is right now? Yes, really, have you?

When is the last time you took a break from ‘doing things and going through the motions of daily activities in autopilot and had a good look at yourself; your life and how things are going?

If you are listening to this podcast, it means that there is a part of you who believes that there are some areas of your life that are not working as they should. The good news is, I have just thing for you!

You can now discover how balanced your life is in 7 essential areas with my FREE Life Balance Workbook!

Just go to: https://www.tulaymasseycoaching.com/thelifebalanceworkbook-podcast

and download this workbook for absolutely FREE now!

 

 

Whether you realise it or not you spend most of your life/days attempting to get your needs met!

Most of your behaviours and feelings, as a result, come from having your needs met or unmet.

The more you understand about yourself and what is important to you the more likely you will be able to choose positive ways to meet your own needs.

If you are feeling a lack of balance, meaning and purpose in your life, then the chances are you have some unmet emotional needs and you have been using your work to fulfil this. Only to end up feeling more frustrated and unfulfilled or even burnt out.

Tune into this episode and discover what it is you really need and what you can do to learn to meet those needs yourself without burning out or looking outside of yourself.

When is the last time you took a break from ‘doing things and going through the motions of daily activities in autopilot and had a good look at yourself; your life and how things are going?

If you are listening to this podcast, it means that there is a part of you who believes that there are some areas of your life that are not working as they should. The good news is, I have just the thing for you!

You can now discover how balanced your life is in 7 essential areas with my FREE Life Balance Workbook!

Just go to: https://www.tulaymasseycoaching.com/thelifebalanceworkbook-podcast

and download this workbook for absolutely FREE now!

 

 What if everyday life was not about trying to juggle your way through it?

Because if it is, you are going to have to drop one ball to catch the other and this is not an act you can keep up with forever. You only have a finite amount of energy in a day, week and month. Have you considered perhaps it is not a matter of juggling, balancing or fixing... but a matter of alignment?

Is it possible that the main reason you cannot keep up with all the juggling and feel imbalanced is that you are out of alignment?

If you are like most high achieving women I work with, then the chances you might be feeling the same. 

Have you ever stopped working for a minute or looked up from your phone, to consider how balanced your life is right now? Yes, really, have you?

When is the last time you took a break from ‘doing things and going through the motions of daily activities in autopilot and had a good look at yourself; your life and how things are going?

If you are listening to this podcast, it means that there is a part of you who believes that there are some areas of your life that are not working as they should. The good news is, I have just the thing for you!

You can now discover how balanced your life is in 7 essential areas with my FREE Life Balance Workbook!

Just go to: https://www.tulaymasseycoaching.com/thelifebalanceworkbook-podcast

and download this workbook for absolutely FREE now!

 

 

First, you create your habits, then your habits create you.

If you want to change what you don't like in your life, first you need to change your habits.

Whether that is how you react to certain situations (snapping at someone),

The stories you tell yourself (I am not good at presenting, so I would rather not do that presentation); I don't have time to exercise; I don't have the energy to get up early etc...

To do that, you need to BE the person who has the habits of the person you aspire to be RIGHT NOW.

I will be/do/have when... doesn't work. because 'when' never comes.

If you are serious about attracting what you want in life, make gratitude a part of your daily routine and watch amazing things happen...

Did you know that you can have 😍 A better mental and physical health 🤗 Enhanced compassion 😊 Feeling of calm and peace 😴 Better sleep  😎 Improved self-esteem.  just by making gratitude a habit? Well, I have just the thing for you to integrate gratitude into your daily life in just 8 minutes a day. It is what I call a 'Heartfelt Gratitude' meditation. I put it together just for you and it is now available to anyone who wants to use it for FREE!

Go to www.tulaymasseycoaching.com/gratitude and start living your life in gratitude right now!