Finding Serenity in the Midst of Chaos

Dr. Tülay Massey
Finding Serenity in the Midst of Chaos

This podcast is a series of transformational radio interviews with my friend 007 Ian Fleming about life’s everyday challenges. We dive into so many life topics and I give profound examples of how I overcame some of these challenges to find inner peace, joy and serenity despite the changing and chaotic circumstances.

  1. 1D AGO

    Episode 205 - Letting go of mum guilt by choosing what is right for you.

    GUILTY AS CHARGED? The mum guilt that is! The one that 💔 creeps up every time you are called to a work trip 💔 eats you up when you are out with friends 💔 makes you check your phone every five minutes when you are out on a date night with your husband, just in case the babysitter called. 💔 makes you feel like you are the worst person in the world if you put your kids in front of the IPad for 30 minutes for a bit of peace and quiet! 💔makes you want to eat your own body weight in chocolate to 'deal with' the emotional overwhelm. Just because you are doing something that is good for you and makes you feel better (not the chocolate) doesn't mean you are guilty! Remember- ❤️To practice your choices/free will- If going away for a night hurts so much, don't. ❤️ By interacting with other people, you are teaching them to be social and have 'emotional intelligence'. ❤️ To trust that they will be OK without you for one evening. ❤️ By taking time out for yourself, you are allowing to BE present with them. ❤️ To LOVE yourself so that you don't abuse your body every time you feel a negative emotion. If you have been carrying some guilt, then the only way to let go is to have more compassion for yourself and love yourself more. You might even want to repeat: I forgive myself, I love and accept myself. Love yourself without guilt, love yourself despite your shortcomings, and then you'll see your life change for the better, quicker. Your kids want a happy mum, not a guilty one!

    22 min
  2. JUL 10

    Episode 204 - Finding and accepting a new purpose after major changes in life

    This week on Finding Serenity in the Midst of Chaos Podcast, we are answering another listener's question. The question was: "How to find a new purpose after major changes in life?" Major life changes may be moving house, starting a new job, having a baby, loss of someone you love, divorce, finding a new life partner or change in physical ability after a major incident. As you'll hear in this episode, this is not a matter of finding a new purpose, but rather about connecting with the purpose you already have. I am not here to give you a step-by-step guide on the is but I did bring some interesting insights.  98% of people live in an unconscious state driven by their ego's desire to be recognised, validated, to be right and to be bigger and better than others. This is why our job titles and what we do rather than who we are, become more important. If you find yourself living in this unconscious state, it'll be a lot harder to navigate through big life changes, because the change threatens your 'chosen identity!' In today's episode, I shed some light on how to shift your identity from what you do, to who you truly are in the core and how easily you'll not just find but accept your new purpose. Plus you'll no longer need validation of permission from others to live this purpose. Join us today in this conversation and remember to leave a review on Apple Podcasts so we can help more people together. --------------------- 😩Torn between what you want to do and what you need to do? ... and you don’t achieve either? 😠 Not doing what you want to do leaves you frustrated! 😔 Not doing what you need to do fills you with guilt and shame! ... As a result, you probably 😩 Feel physically exhausted. 😩 Have lost motivation to do things you normally do easily! 😔 Started to accept that this is a way of living life!   You are not alone! According to recent work-life balance UK statistics ✔️ 88% of UK employees experienced burnout in the last 2 years ✔️ 46% of them are close to burnout this year alone. ✔️ 1 in 3 people feel that they do not have a good work-life balance.   If this sounds like you Then you will love the weekly mindset nuggets with Dr Tülay Massey - a mini masterclass series starting September 19th 2023!   This series of mini-masterclasses will help you  💡Become aware of the unconscious habits that lead to never-ending burnout 🧘 Get out of the constant daily struggle of work-life balance 🥰 Learn to live in Ultimate Serenity now  ... despite the heavy workload and the constant chaos outside of you!   You see, you might have accepted living in constant burnout as a new normal without even realising it!   ⛔ It is time to put a STOP to this!⛔   Register now to discover what causes you to live in this state and more importantly, how to stop it! https://www.tulaymasseycoaching.com/weekly-mindset-nuggets-with-dr-tulay-massey-a-mini-masterclass-series

    28 min
  3. JUL 3

    Episode 203 - How to discover what you want and pursue it when money is an issue

    In this week's episode, I answered a specific question from one of our listeners. The question was: How do you discover what you want, and how do you go about pursuing it when money is an issue? I broke this question down to 2 parts and talked in detail about both separately. It is easy to discover what you want, even if you think you don't yet know what you want. The fact that you are even asking the question means you already know what you want, but you can't admit it to yourself because of fear.  We talked in detail about how to actually discover what you want by simply writing down what you don't want first. Then we answered the second part of the question: How to pursue what you want when money is an issue? Well Money is NOT the issue. Lack of money may be an issue of course if you have no other income. So it is much better to change the language around this and remember money itself is not an issue. Money is a tool for us to create great things in the world. So, for this, I suggested that the listener first start by practising in any way she can, what she wants to pursue for free and gain some experience in it. I gave real examples from my own experience as to how I did this when I decided what I wanted to do. This is a great and insightful episode. Next week we will be answering another listener's question. Her question is: "How will I be able to manage and cope with a high-pressure job upon return to work from maternity leave?" Having had this experience twice before, I have a lot to talk about on this topic. Thank you for listening Until next time!

    34 min
  4. JUN 26

    Episode 202 - How to quieten your inner critique

    In today's episode, we will explore a common challenge many of us face—how to quieten our inner voice. Our thoughts can sometimes become overwhelming, leading to anxiety, self-doubt, and stress. Join us as we uncover effective techniques to silence that inner chatter and find inner peace. Here are some points that might help you Understanding the Inner Voice: We begin by delving into the concept of the inner voice or self-talk. This is the constant stream of thoughts and dialogue that goes on within our minds throughout the day. Acknowledging that the inner voice is a natural phenomenon and an essential aspect of human cognition. Differentiating between a positive, constructive inner voice and negative, self-critical thoughts. Recognising Harmful Inner Dialogues: Identifying the patterns of negative self-talk that can hold us back from achieving our full potential. Discussing common thought distortions such as overgeneralization, catastrophizing, and personalization. The Impact of the Inner Voice on Our Well-being: Exploring the psychological and emotional impact of constant inner chatter on our mental health. How self-critical thoughts can lead to low self-esteem and hinder personal growth. Mindfulness and Awareness: Introducing the practice of mindfulness as a powerful tool to become aware of our thoughts without judgment. Learning to observe our inner voice as an outsider and creating space between ourselves and our thoughts. Challenging and Reframing Negative Thoughts: Discussing strategies to challenge negative thought patterns and replace them with more positive and empowering beliefs. The role of affirmations and visualization in reframing the inner voice. Practical Techniques to Quiet the Mind: Breathing exercises and meditation practices to calm the mind and reduce mental chatter. The benefits of incorporating regular mindfulness or meditation routines into daily life. Engaging in Creative Activities: Exploring the therapeutic impact of engaging in creative pursuits like art, writing, or music to quiet the inner voice. Expressing emotions and thoughts through creative outlets as a form of self-expression and release.   Conclusion: In conclusion, mastering the art of quietening your inner voice is a process that requires patience and practice. By cultivating mindfulness, challenging negative thoughts, and engaging in creative activities, we can take steps towards a quieter, more peaceful mind. Remember, it's essential to be kind to yourself throughout this journey of self-discovery. Embracing our inner voice with compassion allows us to harness its potential for personal growth and self-improvement. Tune in to the next episode, where we'll continue to explore fascinating topics in personal development and well-being. Thank you for listening, and until next time, stay mindful and keep growing! ----------- If you are serious about attracting what you want in life, make gratitude a part of your daily routine and watch amazing things happen... Did you know that you can have😍 A better mental and physical health🤗 Enhanced compassion😊 Feeling of calm and peace😴 Better sleep 😎 Improved self-esteem. just by making gratitude a habit?Well, I have just the thing for you to integrate gratitude into your daily life in just 8 minutes a day.It is what I call a 'Heartfelt Gratitude' meditation.I put it together just for you and it is now available to anyone who wants to use it for FREE! Go to www.tulaymasseycoaching.com/gratitude and start living your life in gratitude right now!

    22 min
  5. JUN 12

    Episode 200 - How to stop reframing your thoughts and start shifting your mistaken beliefs!

    Most people think re-framing your thoughts is a good idea!...I now know that is total BS!I get it! I used to think the same!Until I realized that re-framing your unhelpful thoughts is actually like taking a picture you don't likeand swapping the frame around it with a gold one hoping that this will change the way you feel about the picture!😲You can see now what a broken strategy this is, right?Imagine for a minute, you don't like pink elephants and are thinking 'I hate pink elephants'.Reframing this thought might look like this: 'I don't like pink elephants, but I don't have to like pink elephants to work in the zoo'.Your mind will automatically go to:' I don't like pink elephants' and as your brain is unable to register the 'negative' part of the sentence (I don't like) all you will be focused on is the pink elephant - the very thing you don't like!So as you can see, re-framing an unhelpful thought only keeps you more focused on it.It is not a matter of re-framing thoughts,it is a matter of shifting the paradigms that create those thoughts!💡Because 'When we change the way you look at things, the things you look at change!' Wayne Dyer!'So forget re-framing your thoughts and start shifting your paradigms in my magical breakthrough call!In one hour, I will show you exactly how to transform your thinking and your emotional state at any time you like!If you don't, the call is on me. Book your call for just £99 here: https://www.tulaymasseycoaching.com/offers/2iLkiYs4/checkout

    22 min
  6. JUN 5

    Episode 199 - The truth about the lies you tell yourself every day!

    🛑 STOP lying to yourself!Hear me out before you continue scrolling!🙋‍♀️How many times did you tell yourself yesterday, this week, today...'oh, I don't have time for this in my life right now!''I will do it whenI finish sending this important email...I finish my presentationI get my certification...'🛑 STOP lying to others!How many times did you say to your boss?:'Oh of course I can do that for you. It will be in your inbox by the end of the day!'... while inside you were thinking 'Oh I really wanted to finish early today to spend some time with my daughter. I guess that is off the agenda now'😢Sounds familiar?You are not alone!I used to think TIME was the thing that got in the way of me doing what I wanted to do.You see, it is quite the opposite!I don't have time is a LIE you tell yourselfto keep busy so that you can AVOID facing and dealing with what it is that you really need to deal with.🤯'YES' is a LIE you tell othersso that you keep getting validation for how 'worthy' you are forWHERE you are, your achievements(not WHO you are and there is a big distinction) 💥Imagine, what would be possible if you told one less lie to yourself today?Then practice being honest just for a day and see what comes up for you!  -------------------   Have you ever stopped working for a minute or looked up from your phone, to consider how balanced your life is right now? Yes, really, have you? When is the last time you took a break from ‘doing things and going through the motions of daily activities in autopilot and had a good look at yourself; your life and how things are going? If you are listening to this podcast, it means that there is a part of you who believes that there are some areas of your life that are not working as they should. The good news is, I have just the thing for you! You can now discover how balanced your life is in 7 essential areas with my FREE Life Balance Workbook! Just go to: https://www.tulaymasseycoaching.com/thelifebalanceworkbook-podcast  And download this workbook for absolutely FREE now!

    23 min

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About

This podcast is a series of transformational radio interviews with my friend 007 Ian Fleming about life’s everyday challenges. We dive into so many life topics and I give profound examples of how I overcame some of these challenges to find inner peace, joy and serenity despite the changing and chaotic circumstances.

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