Love, Lust and Real Life

The Unfiltered Conversations That Keep Love Real - With Aaron and Brittani
  • 5.0 (4)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

Marriage isn’t boring—and we’re here to prove it. We talk love, sex, kinks, connection, and what it really takes to keep a relationship alive while raising kids and building a life together. Inspired by spicy books, real experiences, and honest conversations, this podcast blends romance, reality, and self-empowerment. From the spark to the struggles, from passion to purpose—we’re exploring what it means to build a relationship that actually feels good to live in.

  1. 2d ago

    Arousal Types; Understanding How You Get Aroused Or Why It Feels So Difficult

    The reason your sex life feels mismatched might not be low libido—it might be that you and your partner turn on in completely different ways. Brittani and Aaron break down responsive arousal vs. spontaneous arousal and explain why understanding the difference can instantly change the pressure, expectations, and way you connect. If you have ever felt like you’re “never in the mood,” wondered why one partner wants sex out of nowhere while the other needs time to build, or felt awkward initiating when it doesn’t come naturally, this conversation is for you. Brittani explains the nonlinear model of arousal, how it applies far beyond women, and why it matters especially in long-term relationships where communication can make or break intimacy. You’ll discover: What responsive arousal looks like in real life, from mental fatigue to the infamous “switch flips” momentHow spontaneous arousal shows up and why some people seem ready instantlyWhy asking a responsive partner to always initiate can create performance anxiety instead of desireHow non-sexual touch can keep intimacy alive without turning every touch into pressureWhy emotional safety matters when sex is inconsistent due to pregnancy, postpartum recovery, stress, or everyday life Brittani and Aaron also share how learning your arousal type can remove shame, reduce frustration, and help couples stop misreading each other as uninterested, lazy, or disconnected. Instead of forcing a one-size-fits-all script, they show how to build a language of desire that actually fits your relationship. Essential listening if you want better sex, better communication, and a more connected relationship without the guesswork. If you’ve ever wanted to understand your partner—or finally feel understood yourself—this episode gives you the framework to start. Arousal Type Questionnaire ⁠Intimacy & Relationship Q&A LIVE Wed & Fri @ 7PM PST⁠ ⁠Aaron's Instagram⁠ ⁠Brittani's Coaching Website; work with me 1:1⁠

  2. Sep 1

    Where'd My Libido Go? Pt. 3

    The reason your libido feels missing may have nothing to do with desire and everything to do with safety, regulation, and the life you’re living. Aaron and Brittani close out their Where Did My Libido Go series by breaking down the final three pillars of pleasure - 8. Nervous System, 9. Embodiment, and 10. Environment - and show why lasting intimacy starts long before the bedroom. Brittani makes the case that a body stuck in fight, flight, or freeze cannot fully receive pleasure, especially when women have been trained for years to give, perform, and ignore their own needs. Aaron adds the practical side, explaining how stress, cortisol, and daily overload shape your sex life just as much as your relationship does. Together, they connect the dots between emotional safety, physical regulation, and the kind of connection that actually brings desire back online. You’ll discover: Why “safe enough to receive” is the question most people never askHow cortisol can work for you or against youSimple nervous system tools like shaking, sensory grounding, and intentional breath workWhy embodiment means reclaiming every version of yourself, not just the polished oneHow a home environment can either drain intimacy or make it easier to want each other again Brittani shares a deeply personal, practical take on feminine embodiment, from movement and sensuality to calling back the parts of herself she once shelved. Aaron brings the male perspective, showing how he regulates through fitness, nature, music, and conscious breath work, and how those practices support a more present, connected relationship. They also unpack the overlooked role of environment - privacy, clutter, kids, routines, and even the bedroom itself - and why a calm home can change everything from desire to communication. If you’ve ever wondered why sex feels harder to access during busy seasons of life, this episode offers a clearer answer than any quick-fix advice ever could. Essential listening if you want a more honest, grounded path back to intimacy, especially if you’re tired of being told libido is just about wanting it more. This conversation is for anyone ready to stop forcing desire and start rebuilding the conditions that let it return. "Breathe With Sandy" - regulate your nervous system breath work. Connect with us: Intimacy & Relationship Q&A LIVE Wed & Fri @ 7PM PST Aaron's Instagram Brittani's Coaching Website; work with me 1:1

  3. Aug 30

    Free Use in Marriage - Why This Kink Only Works With Trust

    Free use, dominance, and submission are only sexy when they’re built on trust, boundaries, and real emotional safety. Brittani and Aaron break down what Free Use actually means in a relationship, how a healthy Dom-Sub dynamic works, and why this kink can reduce pressure, performance anxiety, reduce decision fatigue, eliminate awkward initiation, and make intimacy feel lighter for both partners.They unpack the difference between a Receiver and an Initiator, what the initiator has to pay attention to before making a move, and why timing, aftercare, energy levels, stress, and prior conversations matter more than most people realize. You’ll also hear how safe words, green-yellow-red check-ins, and explicit boundary setting keep the dynamic consensual, playful, and deeply connected.Brittani shares how free use removes the mental load of initiation, especially for responsive arousal, while Aaron explains what it means to be a pleasure Dom and why his role is about guiding, protecting, and prioritizing her pleasure. Together, they show how this dynamic can create more confidence, less rejection anxiety, and more space for desire to grow instead of stall.You’ll discover:What free use looks like in a real marriage or secure relationshipWhy safety and communication are non-negotiableHow aftercare and timing can make or break the experienceHow Dom-sub dynamics can be mutually fulfilling, not one-sidedA simple way to start with boundaries if you want to explore this slowlyIf you’ve ever felt like initiating is a chore, struggled with sexual tension in your relationship, or wanted to understand kink without the shame and confusion, this episode gives you a candid, practical, and surprisingly grounding look at how these dynamics can actually work. Essential listening if you want more curiosity, more honesty, and more pleasure in your relationship.Connect With Us:*Intimacy & Relationship LIVE's Wednesdays and Fridays at 7PM PST*Aaron's Instagram *BrittNoel.com

  4. Aug 29

    Where'd My Libido Go? Pt. 2

    In this episode of Love, Lust and Real Life, Aaron and Brittani continue their “Where Did My Libido Go?” series by unpacking Pillars 5 through 7 of the Ten Pillars of Pleasure: Relationship, Communication, and Pleasure. They explore how emotional safety, trust, attachment styles, boundaries, initiation, erotic language, arousal, touch, and self-awareness all work together to shape desire and intimacy. Rather than treating low libido like a quick fix problem, Aaron and Brittani explain why real change starts with honest conversation, curiosity, and a deeper understanding of what your body and mind actually need. From subtle ways to initiate to the difference between spontaneous and responsive arousal, this episode offers practical insight for couples who want more connection, more clarity, and more pleasure in their relationship. If you’ve ever wondered why sex feels disconnected, predictable, or hard to access, this conversation gives you a compassionate roadmap for understanding what’s really going on beneath the surface. Tune in for real talk, relationship wisdom, and a fresh perspective on what it takes to build lasting intimacy. Connect With Us: Intimacy & Relationship Q&A, TikTok LIVE Wed & Frid 7PM PST. Aaron's Instagram BrittNoel.com

  5. Aug 12

    A Silent Killer of Sexual Chemistry in Long-Term Relationships

    Predictability can quietly kill desire - even in a relationship that’s otherwise full of love, trust, and attraction. If you’ve ever felt the spark fade because everything in your sex life started to feel scripted, this conversation shows how to bring it back without making intimacy complicated. Brittani and Aaron get brutally honest about a moment that could have turned awkward fast: one playful comment about things feeling “too predictable” could have sent both of them into shame, overthinking, and a ruined night. Instead, they use it as a real-time example of what emotional safety and spontaneity actually look like when you’re trying to keep arousal alive, especially if you’re anxious, ADHD, neurodivergent, or someone who thrives on structure but craves surprise. You’ll discover: Why predictability becomes a major arousal blockerHow shame bubbles can turn one honest comment into spiraling, silence, or resentmentWhat responsive arousal looks like when the body needs time, patience, and the right kind of stimulationHow intentional touch, clear direction, and subtle surprises can shift someone out of their head and into their bodyWhy “spontaneous” does not have to mean random, chaotic, or overcomplicated Brittani shares the emotional side of the experience, including the fear of hurting Aaron’s feelings and the tension of not knowing how he’ll react. Aaron breaks down his mindset too, explaining how he chose to stay grounded, read the room, and pivot instead of collapsing into insecurity. Together they unpack the difference between familiarity that feels safe and predictability that kills momentum. They also get specific about what actually changes the energy: a new setting, a different playlist, altered pacing, body-based cues, and the confidence to keep things playful without forcing performance. If your relationship has slipped into roommate mode, this episode gives you a clear reminder that desire often returns when safety and novelty are working together instead of against each other. Brittani is the voice behind Love, Lust and Real Life, bringing raw, unfiltered relationship and intimacy conversations rooted in honesty and lived experience. Aaron adds the grounded, structured, and highly attentive perspective of a partner who knows how to read subtle cues, hold space, and create safety inside intimacy. Essential listening if you want more connection, more desire, and a sex life that feels alive again - without losing the comfort you already have. Thank you for being here! Please Like, Share and Leave us a review. We also love to connect with you. You can find us below; Join our Intimacy & Relationship LIVEs on Tiktok, Wednesdays and Fridays at 7PM PST Follow Aaron's Instagram Follow Brittani's Instagram

  6. Aug 10

    Where'd My Libido Go? Pt. 1

    Where did your libido go - and what if you are not broken at all? Aaron and Brittani kick off a new series with the framework thousands of listeners have been asking for: "Where'd My Libido Go?" The answer is The 10 Pillars of Pleasure, starting with the first 4 pillars in Brittani's framework of what drivers of libido - 1. Desire, 2. Mind, 3. Body, and 4. Hormones. If you have been wondering why your spark feels buried, why sex feels like another chore, or why you and your partner seem out of sync, this episode gives you the language and the roadmap to start figuring it out. Brittany breaks down desire in a way that makes it finally feel understandable, from Spontaneous versus Responsive arousal to the role fantasy plays in reigniting curiosity. Aaron adds a grounded, science-based lens on how stress, mental load, and transition rituals affect arousal, connection, and the ability to actually show up present. Together, they talk through emotional safety, shame, self-worth, old narratives, and the real-life pressure points that quietly kill desire long before anyone realizes what is happening.You'll discover: Why libido is not a switch that is either on or offHow to tell whether you are spontaneous, responsive, or somewhere in between (take the questionnaire here to find out your Arousal Type; https://www.brittnoel.com/product-page/discover-your-arousal-typeWhy fantasy and vulnerability can strengthen intimacy instead of threatening itHow mental load, anxiety, and stress become libido blockersWhy sleep, nutrition, movement, pain, and body image directly affect pleasureHow hormones, blood labs, and seed cycling can factor into sexual wellness Brittany also shares the journal and tools she created to help people track what is stealing their libido, identify patterns, and get curious about what their body is asking for. Aaron brings his perspective from health, conditioning, and men’s wellness, including how transitional rituals and nervous system regulation can change everything from mood to intimacy. *Sign up to join Brittani's live 60 minute "Where'd My Libido Go" workshop + the 20 page Pleasure Discovery Journal digital download; https://www.brittnoel.com/product-page/where-d-my-libido-go-live-60-minute-course-pleasure-discovery-journal use code "podcast" to save 50% off! This is for anyone who has ever thought, “What happened to my sex drive?” or “Why do I want more connection than my partner does?” It is also essential if you are rebuilding your relationship with your body, navigating hormonal changes, or simply trying to understand how desire really works in real life.If you want practical insight without shame, honest conversations about sex and relationships, and a fresh way to think about pleasure, this is where to start. Part two continues with Relationship, Communication, and pPeasure - and it only gets more interesting from here. Leave us a review, follow along or reach out to B.MortonCoaching@gmail.com with any questions or inquiries.

  7. Aug 10

    Who Are We & What’s This Podcast About?

    We’re back — but we’re not the same people who left three years ago. In the first episode of the rebooted Love, Lust & Real Life, Brittani and Aaron reintroduce themselves, share how 18 years together and raising three kids has shaped their relationship, and talk about why they decided it was finally time to bring the podcast back. They’re also answering some of the questions people seem most curious about: Are they in an open marriage? Why are they so comfortable talking publicly about sex? Are they worried their kids, parents or friends will hear the podcast? And after 18 years together, what does intimacy actually look like inside a real marriage? Brittani brings her background in intimacy, relationships and women’s embodiment, while Aaron brings more than a decade of experience in health, fitness, nutrition and coaching. Together, they’re creating a space for honest conversations about love, desire, sex, marriage, bodies, parenting, communication, pleasure — and everything that happens when those things collide with real life. No pretending to have the perfect marriage. No pretending sex stays the same forever. No shame around asking the questions people actually want answered. Welcome back to Love, Lust & Real Life. Love is the connection.
Lust is the desire.
Real life is everything that happens in between. Connect With Us! https://www.brittnoel.com/about-me Aaron's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mr.__morton Brittani's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/being_brittani_ Brittani's TikTok For Our LIVES (every wed & friday @ 7PM PST) https://www.tiktok.com/@brittanis.booked You can also email questions or inquiries to B.Mortoncoaching@gmail.com

  8. 03/07/2023

    Ep.12 Are Your Needs Being Met?

    Are you effectively communicating your needs to the people around you? Do you even know what your own needs are? We talk about why it's important to take time to know your own needs, how to speak directly and honestly about what your needs are and  how to trust the people around you to show up. You are deserving of the life you dream of but how are you ever going to get it if you're constantly hoping other will just figure it out for you without you taking the time to communicate it effectively!

    Ep.12 Are Your Needs Being Met?
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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
4 Ratings

About

Marriage isn’t boring—and we’re here to prove it. We talk love, sex, kinks, connection, and what it really takes to keep a relationship alive while raising kids and building a life together. Inspired by spicy books, real experiences, and honest conversations, this podcast blends romance, reality, and self-empowerment. From the spark to the struggles, from passion to purpose—we’re exploring what it means to build a relationship that actually feels good to live in.

Information

  • Creator
    The Unfiltered Conversations That Keep Love Real - With Aaron and Brittani
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2026
  • Episodes
    20
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © The Unfiltered Conversations That Keep Love Real - With Aaron and Brittani
  • Show Website
    Love, Lust and Real Life