Raised Resilient: Help Your Highly Sensitive Child

Dr. Hilary Mandzik - Psychologist
  • 4.9 (66)
  • Kids & Family

Parenting is the hardest job ever – and parenting a highly sensitive child who’s struggling can feel downright impossible. If you’re suffering through endless meltdowns, walking on eggshells to avoid your child’s huge emotions, and losing sleep worrying that you’re failing your child, you’ve landed in the right place. I’m Dr. Hilary Mandzik – clinical psychologist, parenting specialist, and mom of 3. And I’m here to help you feel GOOD about parenting your highly sensitive child. Join me each week on the Raised Resilient podcast as we explore the topics parents worry about most when it comes to raising highly sensitive kids: managing meltdowns, building emotion regulation, understanding highly sensitive kids, making sense of challenging behaviors, building self-esteem, finding parenting strategies that actually work *with* your child’s sensitivity ... and everything in between. I’ll help you understand your child’s behavior (and your reactions to it!) so that even the really hard moments make more sense. I’ll empower you with tools, strategies, and scripts to navigate those really hard moments with connection and confidence. (And I’ll remind you that no tool, strategy, or script is as powerful as your parenting ace – your relationship with your child!) I’m passionate about parenting differently – parenting in a way that sees all kids as good, even when they’re struggling. I’m passionate about breaking unhelpful generational cycles and putting a hard stop to spanking, time outs, shaming, and yelling. I’m passionate about helping highly sensitive kids build the skills they need in order to manage their big emotions successfully ... and parents learning to regulate their own emotions alongside their children. I want to help you stop worrying about whether you’re “raising them right” and feel confident that your kids will grow up trusting themselves and feeling comfortable in their skin … because they were raised resilient. And that’s big. Because raising our kids resilient can literally make this world a better place. Listen, parenting is hard no matter how you do it. You won’t “enjoy every moment”, no matter what that lady at the store says. But I’m here to help you go from just barely surviving to parenting in a way that genuinely feels good, for you and your highly sensitive child. So warm up your coffee and grab your ear buds. It’s time to turn your child’s sensitivity into their SUPERPOWER! Connect with me: https://www.raisedresilient.com/ IG: @raisedresilient Schedule your FREE Breakthrough Session: https://www.raisedresilient.com/breakthrough Do YOU have a highly sensitive child? Take my FREE QUIZ to find out: https://www.raisedresilient.com/quiz Major themes: parenting highly sensitive / deeply feeling kids; cycle breaking; building emotion regulation; generational healing; respectful parenting; gentle parenting; peaceful parenting; attachment theory / building a secure attachment

  1. 5d ago

    159: Why The “Easy” Child Needs Emotional Attention Too (and How to Help Them Express Big Feelings Before They Become a People Pleaser)

    Have you ever noticed that your easy child never seems to have a hard day, no matter what's happening with their sibling's meltdowns? In this episode, I walk you through why the child who never falls apart is often the one working the hardest to keep their feelings from showing. I also talk about why an easy child having big feelings means the whole family system is finally getting support. I break down how these family dynamics form without anyone choosing them, and why emotional suppression in the easy child often goes unnoticed until it costs them. You'll learn: Why your easy child might be suppressing emotions to keep the peace at homeWhat to watch for when one child becomes the family's people pleaserWhat to know about how sibling dynamics change once you understand what's happening underneath the surfaceWhy emotional suppression in childhood can resurface later as anxiety or shutting downHow to support a family system where every child gets help, not just the one having meltdownsWhat to do when your easy child starts having behaviors you've never seen beforeHow to read sibling relationship patterns to see which child is carrying too much for the familyWhy an identified patient often isn't the only child who needs supportWhat to expect as your family works toward meeting emotional needs for every childWhy unmet emotional needs in childhood can turn into people-pleasing as an adult If you have one child who seems to need so much from you and another who seems to need very little, this episode will help you look at that dynamic in a completely different way. Here's to raising resilient kids, Dr. Hilary Find more from Dr. Hilary: Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website

  2. Aug 25

    158: Kindergarten Transition for Sensitive Kids: What the Bedtime Meltdowns Really Mean and How to Help Your Child Adjust

    Does your sensitive child seem totally fine at school, calm at drop off and easygoing with their teacher, only to completely fall apart when bedtime comes, leaving you wondering what a meltdown showing up somewhere you weren't looking actually means? In this episode, I walk you through how I'm watching for signs of stress in my own sensitive child during her kindergarten transition, even though she isn't showing any of the signs I expected. I talk about the water pitcher concept I use to explain how kids carry stress they don't show, and how a child can separate just fine, do great with her teacher, and still be overwhelmed by everything her body is managing all day. I share the one meltdown we did have, what set it off, and why bedtime tears finally showed up. You'll learn: Why a child can separate without tears and still be carrying a full day of stressWhat the water pitcher concept explains about meltdowns that seem to come from nowhereHow stress hormones make it harder for overtired kids to fall asleepWhy bedtime tears show up even when the day looked easyWhat to say when your child tells you they hate school and never want to go backHow play helps a child process a school transition that didn't make sense to them yetWhy pushing through playtime can trigger the meltdown you were trying to avoidWhat it means when your child says they save their tears for youHow to tell the difference between a hard transition and separation anxietyWhy occasional meltdowns during a big transition don't mean something's wrongIf you've been searching for what a calm kindergarten transition is hiding, or wondering how to build emotional safety for a sensitive kid, this episode is for you. Here's to raising resilient kids, Dr. Hilary Find more from Dr. Hilary: Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website Wondering whether your child is really ready for kindergarten? It's not about academics. Go back and listen to my episode on kindergarten readiness to find out what to look for instead. Curious how I decide when to follow my child's lead into something intense, like gymnastics, even when it's not the typical path? Listen to my episode on gymnastics and developmental appropriateness.

  3. Aug 18

    157: Are Your Sensitive Child's Meltdowns Holding Your Family Hostage? How To Rebuild The Connection Underneath It All And Enjoy Your Family Again

    Does every day bring another emotional meltdown that lasts an hour or longer, leaving you walking on eggshells at home, afraid that one wrong word will set off your highly sensitive child? In this episode, I'm joined by Nick and Kelsey, parents of a four-year-old son and an almost two-year-old daughter, who completed my eight-week Chaos to Connection parent coaching program. We talk about the chaos before the program, when hour-long meltdowns happened daily and their family had grown apart. They open up about weighing therapy options, their fear of investing in a parenting program while paying for two kids in daycare, and the introspective first module that started with the parents instead of the child. They also share where things stand now, from family bonding between siblings to a son who finishes his mom's sentences when she's frustrated. In this episode, you'll learn: How to recognize when meltdowns are running your entire householdWhy connection before correction is the foundation that makes every strategy workWhat to expect from the inner work at the start of a parenting support programWhy trying to fix your kid misses the deeper issueHow to weigh coaching against weekly appointment-based optionsWhat changes when parents commit fully for eight weeksHow connected parenting helps a child name and share emotions without shameWhy sibling empathy grows when a dysregulated kid gets supportHow to end a hard day proud of the way you showed upWhat it takes to get your family connection back If you've been searching for gentle parenting, parent coaching, and support for your sensitive child, this episode is your invitation to reclaim peace and connection in your home. Here's to raising resilient kids, Dr. Hilary Find more from Dr. Hilary: Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website Click here to book a FREE breakthrough call with us

  4. Aug 11

    156: Tantrum Vs Meltdown: How Tell the Difference -- and How to Handle Temper Tantrums When Your Sensitive Child Is Completely Overwhelmed (and How Emotional Overload Shows Up in Kids)

    Can you tell the difference between tantrums and meltdowns?  In this episode, I walk you through what causes each one and what to do differently for each. In this episode, you'll learn: Why a tantrum and a meltdown look identical from the outsideWhy your child holds it together at school and falls apart at homeHow sensory input builds up and triggers a sensory meltdown with no visible causeWhat to say when your child falls apart over a cut bananaWhy a terrible twos tantrum is a good signHow to handle temper tantrums with one sentence that ends most of themHow to raise a child who handles disappointment without giving inWhy punishments, rewards, and bribes stop working during emotional overloadWhat your two jobs are once a meltdown startsHow to tell which one you're in when the behavior gives you no clueIf you've been searching for meltdowns vs tantrums, temper tantrums, or what age do tantrums start, this episode is your invitation to respond to what's actually happening for your child. Here's to raising resilient kids, Dr. Hilary Find more from Dr. Hilary: Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website Click here to book a FREE breakthrough call with us

  5. Aug 4

    155: Tried Every Gentle Parenting Script And Still Stuck In The Meltdown Cycle? What Validating Feelings Advice Left Out (And What To Do Instead)

    Have you validated every emotion, stayed calm through the hitting, and still watched the meltdowns stretch on for hours over nothing?  In this episode, I walk you through how gentle parenting got confused with permissive parenting and what to do when nothing you've tried has working results. I talk about the four parenting styles, including authoritarian parenting and uninvolved parenting, and why the warm and boundaried one still holds up decades later. I also talk about the shame that builds in kids who can't stop their own bodies, and why the behaviors grow when nobody steps in to help. In this episode, you'll learn: Why allowing all emotions never meant allowing all behaviorsWhat the four parenting styles actually describe and where gentle parenting was meant to fitThe difference between permissive and authoritative parentingHow to stop unsafe behaviors physically and with warmth while the emotion stays welcomeWhy setting boundaries is something you do rather than something you ask forWhat happens when you stay outwardly calm and push your own frustration downWhy your child reads your energy, tone, and body language before your wordsHow to tell dysregulation apart from defiance when your child smiles at youWhat shame does to a kid who already knows they're out of controlWhy impulse control develops later for younger and neurodivergent kidsHow to access genuine empathy in your child's hardest moments If you've been doing all the right things and the hard days keep repeating, listen in with fresh ears, because there's a version of this where your child's big feelings stop running the house and validating feelings becomes something you mean instead of something you recite. Here's to raising resilient kids, Dr. Hilary Find more from Dr. Hilary: Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website Click here to book a FREE breakthrough call with us

  6. Jul 28

    154: What Age Should Your Sensitive Kid Get a Smartphone? My Honest Answer as a Psychologist Mom, the Real Risks, and the Exact Plan I'm Using With My Sensitive Child

    Is your child asking for a first phone? How do you know if they've actually reached digital readiness? And what happens once you hand over that device and can't take it back? In this episode, I share parent guidance on making the smartphone decision that fits your child's maturity and your family's values. I walk you through how to evaluate digital readiness and the parenting boundaries that can protect your child without isolating them from friends. I also share why social media and AI deserve extra caution, how healthy technology habits begin before a child has unrestricted internet access, and the boundaries I'm planning to use, including clear phone rules, firm screen limits, thoughtful digital boundaries, protected sleep, and delayed social media. You'll learn: Why maturity is more important than age when deciding whether your child is ready for a smartphoneHow peer pressure can shape the first phone conversationWhy calling and texting are different from unrestricted internet and social media accessWhat parents need to understand about algorithms designed to keep kids scrollingWhy AI should never replace trusted adult support or guidanceHow to talk with kids about inaccurate information generated by AIWhy phones should stay out of the bedroom at nightHow device-free meals can protect family connectionWhen a basic phone or watch may meet your child's communication needs, addressing phone access without a full smartphoneWhat to consider before allowing group chats or social media accountsWhy preserving life without constant notifications mattersWhy kids with emotional intensity may need extra support around screen time If you've felt pressured to give your child a smartphone because their friends already have one, unsure which boundaries matter most, or worried about social media and AI, this episode is for you. Here's to raising resilient kids, Dr. Hilary Find more from Dr. Hilary: Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website Books Mentioned Hands Free Mama by Rachel Macy StaffordThe Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt

  7. Jul 21

    153: Why Parenting Strategies Aren't Working (& What to Do Instead) - Jeanne & Josh's Story

    Watch my video → How to End Your Child's Meltdowns in 8 Weeks or Less For eight years, their son had never once said "I love you", and waking him up for school usually meant getting kicked or hit.  Jeannie and Josh are the parents of an eight-year-old adopted, neurodivergent, highly sensitive boy. Their days had turned into a cycle of hitting, yelling, and dysregulation that started the moment their son woke up. Josh stopped kissing him awake because it usually ended with knuckles to his forehead. Simple things like ice cream runs turned into battles. They had read the books, tried the strategies, and listened to every ADHD and sensitivity podcast they could find. None of it stuck, because they were still coming at it from one question: how do we fix him? The turn came when they stopped asking that question. Their story depicts what it feels like to look at your own reactions, childhood, and parenting patterns. It also demonstrates what happens when both parents finally speak the same language. If you're carrying fear about who your child might become in five years, don’t miss this episode. You’ll learn: [0:00] Introduction [2:13] Every parenting idea they had got roadblocked, and they didn't know why [4:13] Signs Josh and Jeannie wish they'd caught earlier [8:26] Things they tried before finding me, and why the "fix him" mindset failed [12:04] Why strategies alone don't work without deeper seismic shifts underneath [14:05] The hardest part now isn't their child’s behaviour, it's family members who don't get it [18:58] How Josh’s co-regulation also co-regulated the traumatised boy inside his dad [21:00] The fear of picturing their son at 16, and the big leap that followed [28:02] Information-based programs can leave you more overwhelmed, not more healed [34:43] The moment they realised their son hadn't said "I love you" in eight years Find more from Dr. Hilary: Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website

  8. Jul 14

    152: What to do If Your Sensitive Child Shows No Empathy For Others

    Watch my video → How to End Your Child's Meltdowns in 8 Weeks or Less Sensitive kids don't lack empathy. They're buried under so much shame they can't reach it. Sensitive kids feel more, not less. When they hurt someone, that "I'm a bad kid" feeling floods them so hard they wall off any softer emotion underneath, including remorse. From the outside, that wall reads as coldness. On the inside, it's the opposite. Here's the part most parents miss: saying "I'm sorry" takes vulnerability. A child drowning in shame cannot access vulnerability. So the more you push for accountability, the more the wall grows, and the less empathy you see. The shift that changes this is smaller and stranger than most parenting advice suggests. It has almost nothing to do with consequences, apologies, or teaching lessons in the moment. If you've ever wondered whether your child is lacking empathy, listen to this before you draw any conclusions. You’ll learn: [0:00] Introduction [1:38] The wall of shame sitting between your child and the empathy they feel [4:07] The empathy your child needs from you before they can access their own [5:47] The moments that build the wall of shame, or tear it down Find more from Dr. Hilary: Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website

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Parenting is the hardest job ever – and parenting a highly sensitive child who’s struggling can feel downright impossible. If you’re suffering through endless meltdowns, walking on eggshells to avoid your child’s huge emotions, and losing sleep worrying that you’re failing your child, you’ve landed in the right place. I’m Dr. Hilary Mandzik – clinical psychologist, parenting specialist, and mom of 3. And I’m here to help you feel GOOD about parenting your highly sensitive child. Join me each week on the Raised Resilient podcast as we explore the topics parents worry about most when it comes to raising highly sensitive kids: managing meltdowns, building emotion regulation, understanding highly sensitive kids, making sense of challenging behaviors, building self-esteem, finding parenting strategies that actually work *with* your child’s sensitivity ... and everything in between. I’ll help you understand your child’s behavior (and your reactions to it!) so that even the really hard moments make more sense. I’ll empower you with tools, strategies, and scripts to navigate those really hard moments with connection and confidence. (And I’ll remind you that no tool, strategy, or script is as powerful as your parenting ace – your relationship with your child!) I’m passionate about parenting differently – parenting in a way that sees all kids as good, even when they’re struggling. I’m passionate about breaking unhelpful generational cycles and putting a hard stop to spanking, time outs, shaming, and yelling. I’m passionate about helping highly sensitive kids build the skills they need in order to manage their big emotions successfully ... and parents learning to regulate their own emotions alongside their children. I want to help you stop worrying about whether you’re “raising them right” and feel confident that your kids will grow up trusting themselves and feeling comfortable in their skin … because they were raised resilient. And that’s big. Because raising our kids resilient can literally make this world a better place. Listen, parenting is hard no matter how you do it. You won’t “enjoy every moment”, no matter what that lady at the store says. But I’m here to help you go from just barely surviving to parenting in a way that genuinely feels good, for you and your highly sensitive child. So warm up your coffee and grab your ear buds. It’s time to turn your child’s sensitivity into their SUPERPOWER! Connect with me: https://www.raisedresilient.com/ IG: @raisedresilient Schedule your FREE Breakthrough Session: https://www.raisedresilient.com/breakthrough Do YOU have a highly sensitive child? Take my FREE QUIZ to find out: https://www.raisedresilient.com/quiz Major themes: parenting highly sensitive / deeply feeling kids; cycle breaking; building emotion regulation; generational healing; respectful parenting; gentle parenting; peaceful parenting; attachment theory / building a secure attachment

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