Choosing Us

Brad and Michaela Draper
  • 5.0 (11)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Weekly

Brad and Michaela Draper have what many people call "a unique relationship that others strive to be like". Though they feel their relationship is fairly normal, they also realize they are different from most other relationships. They found each on the dance floor of a bar, were married 9 months later, were told they were making a massive mistake... here they are 10 years later with two little rug rats. Brad and Michaela are beyond excited to share some of the nuggets they have picked up along the way while curating what many would say is the ultimate power couple. Join them on this journey as they relay a variety of topics to help you create the type relationship you strive for most. Listen in! Thank you for listening to this episode of Choosing Us.

  1. 4d ago

    154. Stop Waiting: Create Joy Now With the People You Love

    Stop Waiting and Start Living: The Choosing Us Philosophy Unexpectedly spotting a zebra during a simple family park visit might just be the perfect metaphor for what the Drapers are preaching in this episode of Choosing Us. Life's best moments rarely arrive on schedule, and that is exactly the point. The Drapers make a genuinely compelling case that strong relationships and joyful living don't require money, grand gestures, or ideal circumstances. They share stories ranging from dating on swings to roadside sand dunes with their kids, illustrating how presence and intentionality create lasting memories far more effectively than elaborate plans ever could. One speaker even reflects on a father who commuted weekly between New Jersey and California, yet still managed to show up in deeply meaningful ways through fly fishing and simple exploration together. What does your daily schedule actually say about what you value? Because according to the Drapers, you have complete control over that schedule right now. Thoughtfully, they also connect this philosophy outward, noting their community involvement began small with local soup kitchens and youth centers. Living fully isn't selfish; it's generous. Since tomorrow isn't guaranteed (COVID and sudden losses made that painfully clear), the Drapers urge listeners to stop merely getting through life and start actively choosing joy. Tune in to hear how the Drapers are making intentional living feel genuinely achievable. Now, If you find this episode valuable, please share with your significant other, friends, and family. We love you! Listen in! Thank you for listening to this episode of Choosing Us.

  2. Oct 21

    153. When You're Having an Off Day: Grace, Self-Care, and Emotional Regulation in Marriage

    When One Bad Morning Almost Derailed Everything Rarely does a single frustrating morning reveal so much about what makes or breaks a relationship. In this episode of "Choosing Us," Brad and Michaela get refreshingly honest about what happens when emotional regulation falls apart and negative energy quietly takes over an entire household. Brad's difficult day started small, with the dog and toddler pushing him past his limit, but his mood spread through the family atmosphere fast. (It's honestly relatable in the most uncomfortable way.) Michaela noticed immediately and did something simple but powerful: she told him to take a nap. Not to push through. Not to pretend. Just rest and reset. What could you gain from five to ten minutes of real self-care on your hardest days? The episode digs into that question directly, pulling from real experiences including losing $270,000 and finding unexpected relief through the shooting range. The core message is this: you cannot fix your partner, you can only create space for them to find their way back. One partner staying grounded while the other struggles is not a weakness in the relationship, it is the relationship working exactly as it should. Ultimately, both partners must choose happiness individually before they can choose it together. Listen to this episode now. Now, If you find this episode valuable, please share with your significant other, friends, and family. We love you! Listen in! Thank you for listening to this episode of Choosing Us.

  3. Oct 14

    152. Opening Our Home: Building Sanctuaries of Compassion

    Building a Life That Actually Means Something What does it look like to open your home, your schedule, and your heart to people who need it most? The Drapers, best friends and co-hosts, are doing exactly that and sharing every honest, messy detail along the way. Currently preparing their basement apartment for a friend navigating a difficult life transition, the Drapers reflect on how their home has become a genuine sanctuary for people in crisis. (They originally rented the space to afford their 2022 home purchase, which makes this generosity even more striking.) Guests consistently report feeling a different spiritual presence there, something the Drapers connect directly to placing Christ at the center of their home. Practically speaking, hospitality costs them. Increased utilities, household stress, and Brad managing their 10-month-old daughter during work calls from home are all real challenges they openly acknowledge. Honestly, the inconvenience is real and it is ongoing. Yet they keep showing up anyway, choosing meaningful relationships over comfortable routines. Are you truly giving your best effort in relationships, family, and life right now? That question sits at the heart of this conversation. Deeply rooted in mutual support and continuous self-improvement, this episode challenges listeners to look outward even when life feels chaotic. Listen in. You will not regret it. Now, If you find this episode valuable, please share with your significant other, friends, and family. We love you! Listen in! Thank you for listening to this episode of Choosing Us.

  4. Oct 7

    151. Speaking Your Partner's Love Language: How Brad and Michaela Transformed Their Marriage

    When Folding Laundry Almost Broke a Marriage What happens when two people love each other deeply but speak completely different emotional languages? Brad and Michaela Draper of "Choosing Us" lived that confusion firsthand, and their story is both funny and genuinely eye-opening. In their 13-year marriage, Brad's primary love language is acts of service while Michaela's is physical touch. The tension came to a head in a moment that perfectly captures how well-meaning couples miss each other entirely: Brad folded laundry upstairs while Michaela sat downstairs wanting to cuddle. Both were trying to show love. Neither felt it. Understanding love languages transformed everything for them. Through teaching a prison program class on the topic, they came to see how each person both gives and receives affection differently, and how those preferences shift with life circumstances, hormones, and growing families. (They also had some relatable trouble adjusting to new iPhones, which, honestly, same.) Importantly, they stress that love languages change over time, they're not fixed traits but evolving needs. Their insights extend beyond marriage to children, friendships, and all meaningful relationships. If you have ever felt unloved despite someone clearly trying, this episode might explain exactly why. Tune in to "Choosing Us" and let Brad and Michaela show you how to finally speak someone's language. Now, If you find this episode valuable, please share with your significant other, friends, and family. We love you! Listen in! Thank you for listening to this episode of Choosing Us.

  5. Sep 30

    150. 150 Episodes of Teamwork: Grace, Grit, and Growing Together

    150 Episodes and Still Going Strong Incredibly, reaching episode 150 puts The Drapers in the top five percent of all podcasts since most shows don't survive past episode twenty. That milestone alone makes this episode worth your time. Michaela and Brad recorded this one late into the night, exhausted but committed, because keeping promises matters even when life gets messy. What does it actually look like to keep a marriage thriving through sick kids, morning routine battles, and a deeply inconvenient stomach bug hitting three children on different days? (The "double dragon" phenomenon they describe is as chaotic as it sounds.) This episode gets into all of it with honesty and humor. In nearly three years of consistent content, the Drapers have built something real: a show that has grown alongside their work teaching in prisons, which has become their actual weekly date night. Their central message is clear and worth repeating: relationships don't just drift, they require constant intentional effort or couples slowly become roommates instead of best friends. Can a conversation about diaper pails and trash bags half-left in the garage genuinely strengthen your marriage? Surprisingly, yes. From morning routines to grace under pressure, this episode is a reminder that the small things are never really small. Listen to episode 150 of Choosing Us now. Now, If you find this episode valuable, please share with your significant other, friends, and family. We love you! Listen in! Thank you for listening to this episode of Choosing Us.

  6. Sep 23

    149. From $14/Hour Dates to Meaningful Moments: Why Less Really Is More

    Choosing Us: Why Doing Less Could Save Your Relationship Surprisingly, the secret to a stronger marriage might be as simple as a walk in the park and homemade popcorn. The Drapers, hosts of Choosing Us, have spent 13 years figuring out what actually makes relationships thrive, and their answer might challenge everything you think you know about date nights. What if the pressure to make everything bigger and better is actually working against you? Starting out at $14 per hour, the Drapers made real sacrifices to afford modest dinners at places like Zupas and Olive Garden. Now spending over $100 at sushi restaurants, they've come to realize that the dollar amount was never the point. Meaningful connection, real and genuine closeness, was always built in the simpler moments. Because when life piles on (mortgages, aging grandparents, endless responsibilities), the instinct is to add more effort rather than subtract. Inspired by Robin Sharma, one speaker even built a daily 15 to 25 minute afternoon nap into his executive schedule, doubling down on rest instead of grinding harder. Their coach reinforces this: rest must counterbalance added stress. Cutting from fifty commitments to twenty-five lets you invest deeply where it counts most. Tune into this episode for a genuinely refreshing reminder that doing less can mean living better. Now, If you find this episode valuable, please share with your significant other, friends, and family. We love you! Listen in! Thank you for listening to this episode of Choosing Us.

  7. Sep 16

    148. Breaking the Bedroom Silence: Why Sexual Intimacy Matters More Than You Think

    Choosing Us: Why Sexual Intimacy Could Be Making or Breaking Your Marriage What if neglecting sexual intimacy is quietly turning your marriage into a glorified roommate situation? The Drapers, hosts of "Choosing Us," are breaking generational silence around bedroom conversations and making a compelling case for why this topic deserves an honest look. After over twelve years of marriage, the Drapers openly share how their intimate connection has actually improved over time through honest, ongoing communication. Frequently, couples fall into repetitive routines that inevitably lead to boredom, and the Drapers argue this is avoidable with intentional effort. They get refreshingly specific, including sending detailed flirty texts throughout the day and introducing something as simple as silk pajamas from Amazon to shift the energy from parental roles to something more playful and connected. Beyond the bedroom, they frame intimacy not as a transactional act but as a genuine form of communication that strengthens every other part of a relationship. (The comparison to brushing teeth with the opposite hand is unexpectedly perfect here.) They also explore how changing environments, whether hotel stays or simply moving to a different room, keeps both partners mentally present rather than distracted. Clearly, this episode covers real, practical ground that most relationship conversations avoid entirely. Tune in to hear the full conversation with the Drapers on "Choosing Us." Now, If you find this episode valuable, please share with your significant other, friends, and family. We love you! Listen in! Thank you for listening to this episode of Choosing Us.

  8. Sep 9

    147. Control the Controllables: Creating experiences with holidays and birthdays

    Brad and Michaela speak directly to their experinces with holidays and birthdays. They reference tradions and how to create your own, unique traditions, different from what you grew up with. The Drapers talk about merging ideas of how holidays should be experienced and Michaela talks about her love for holidays and Brad's lack thereof. Michaela also speaks directly to her birthday this year and how it absolutely did not go according to plan. What would you do if you had jury duty on your birthday? Now, If you find this episode valuable, please share with your significant other, friends, and family. We love you! Listen in! Thank you for listening to this episode of Choosing Us.

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5
out of 5
11 Ratings

About

Brad and Michaela Draper have what many people call "a unique relationship that others strive to be like". Though they feel their relationship is fairly normal, they also realize they are different from most other relationships. They found each on the dance floor of a bar, were married 9 months later, were told they were making a massive mistake... here they are 10 years later with two little rug rats. Brad and Michaela are beyond excited to share some of the nuggets they have picked up along the way while curating what many would say is the ultimate power couple. Join them on this journey as they relay a variety of topics to help you create the type relationship you strive for most. Listen in! Thank you for listening to this episode of Choosing Us.

Information

  • Creator
    Brad and Michaela Draper
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2026
  • Episodes
    154
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Copyright Brad Draper
  • Show Website
    Choosing Us

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