Insights from the Couch - Real Talk for Women at Midlife

Colette Fehr, Laura Bowman
  • 4.9 (55)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

Insights from the Couch is your go-to podcast for smart, self-aware women in midlife navigating perimenopause, burnout, marriage shifts, identity changes, and the emotional chaos of “What now?” Hosted by best friends and seasoned therapists Colette Fehr and Laura Bowman, this is where therapy meets real life — bold conversations, hard truths, and powerful tools to help you get unstuck and come alive.Whether you're questioning your relationship, struggling with empty nest, battling people-pleasing or perfectionism, or just feeling flat and disconnected from yourself — this show is for you.Colette and Laura bring decades of clinical experience (and lived midlife wisdom) to every episode. Expect real talk on the things no one prepares you for: midlife reinvention, perimenopause and hormone shifts, marriage and divorce, boundaries, friendships, confidence, identity loss, and what it actually takes to build a life you want at this stage — not just one you tolerate.This is where smart women get unstuck and come alive.🎧 New episodes every week🌟 Join the Midlife Masterclass: insightsfromthecouch.org/group-coaching-program🩷 Grab your free guide: The Midlife Roadmap — 7 Skills to Get Unstuck and Come Alive👉 Follow us on Instagram: @insightsfromthecouch

  1. 18h ago

    Ep. 121: How to be Hot at Midlife

    Can you really be hot at midlife? Hell yes! But what does that actually mean when you're in your 50s, your body is changing, and the reflection in the mirror doesn't always match the version of yourself you see in your head? This week, we're having a fun, honest, and sometimes hilarious conversation about beauty, aging, personal style, and what it really takes to look and feel your best in midlife. From plastic surgery and celebrity beauty standards to finding your signature style and embracing a little healthy delusion, we're getting into all of it. But being hot at midlife is about so much more than great clothes, good hair, or looking younger. We're talking about the connection between confidence, mindset, movement, and that elusive joie de vivre that makes some women absolutely magnetic. How do you reconnect with your body, rediscover what excites you, and feel genuinely good in your own skin? And what if the secret to feeling sexy and vibrant in your 50s has less to do with fighting aging and more to do with how you're living? Join us as we explore what it means to feel alive, empowered, and yes, HOT at midlife! Episode Highlights [0:03] - Can you really be hot at midlife? We're diving into beauty, aging, and feeling your best in your 50s. [1:34] - Hollywood beauty icons, plastic surgery, and why we're questioning the pressure to look forever young. [5:20] - A little healthy delusion? Why feeling attractive might matter more than what the mirror tells you. [6:58] - The hot pink blazer moment: How finding your personal style can transform your midlife confidence. [8:21] - Reinventing your wardrobe in your 50s without losing your personality or following every fashion trend. [11:30] - Fabrics, flattering fits, comfort, and the case for fewer, higher-quality wardrobe staples. [15:14] - Beyond beauty: Why your mindset, energy, and sense of aliveness are the biggest parts of being hot at midlife. [16:12] - Taking risks, getting outside your comfort zone, and staying engaged in life. [19:40] - Getting off the sidelines and putting yourself out there, even when it feels uncomfortable. [20:14] - Husbands say the darndest things! A hilarious (and slightly painful) conversation about aging, attractiveness, and double standards. [23:05] - Why confidence and joie de vivre make women magnetic, regardless of age. [24:00] - Refreshing your look, rethinking your hair, and figuring out what feels like YOU now. [25:05] - Where to start when you're not feeling sexy, confident, or excited about life. [25:31] - Body image at midlife: How movement can change your relationship with your body, even without weight loss. [26:35] - Weight, wellness, self-acceptance, and finding freedom from the constant pressure to look a certain way. [28:10] - Feeling strong, reconnecting with your sexuality, and rediscovering the things that light you up. [28:50] - Getting curious about your childhood passions and finding new sources of joy and fulfillment. [29:31] - The art of savoring, pursuing meaningful goals, and feeling fired up about your future. [30:03] - Why having something to work toward can bring excitement, purpose, and vitality back into your life. [31:19] - The inside job: Why no amount of shopping, cosmetic procedures, or weight loss can replace genuine inner confidence. [31:54] - The beauty of midlife: Feeling more comfortable, content, and confident in your own skin than ever before.  If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share Insights from the Couch with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more! Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book 🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season.  Come join us—we’d love to have you! 👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/ Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book Recognized by FeedSpot: Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

  2. Oct 7

    Ep. 120: How to Plan a Rewirement Instead of a Retirement with Joanna Danaher

    What happens when you’ve spent decades building a career, raising a family, achieving, producing, and checking all the boxes… and suddenly you’re staring down retirement? We spend years preparing financially for retirement, but most of us don’t spend nearly enough time preparing emotionally for what happens when the identity, structure, and purpose tied to work begin to shift. In this episode, we’re joined by Johanna Danaher, life and leadership coach and founder of Anchor to Aspire Coaching, to talk about why retirement can be less about retiring and more about rewiring. We explore identity beyond achievement, the emotions that come with major life transitions, why busyness can keep us from asking the deeper questions, and how to discover what genuinely lights you up in your next chapter. Whether retirement is years away, unexpectedly right in front of you, or you’re simply wondering what you want your second act to look like, this conversation will get you thinking. Episode Highlights [0:03] - Why financial preparation for retirement is only part of the equation—and the emotional piece we often overlook. [1:50] - Johanna shares how losing her corporate role after 25 years forced her to ask: Who am I without the title that defined me? [3:08] - Why even positive change can bring grief, anger, excitement, fear, and joy all at once. [5:41] - When everything changes at the same time: career, family, finances, and stepping into the unknown. [7:14] - The identity vacuum that can appear when high achievers leave careers built around productivity and accomplishment. [8:11] - Is busyness actually keeping us from confronting grief, uncertainty, and the question of who we want to be? [10:28] - Following your energy: noticing what genuinely lights you up versus what depletes you. [12:52] - When our greatest strengths turn against us: productivity becomes overfunctioning, control becomes rigidity, and high standards become a relentless inner critic. [15:04] - Johanna introduces “transferable brilliance” and how our human skills can help shape an entirely new chapter. [18:17] - The WAVES Transformation Journey: exploring who you are, your abilities, values, energy, and what success means on your terms. [20:00] - How Johanna turned a difficult celiac diagnosis and her love of food into an unexpected passion project. [21:34] - Why we believe in actively dabbling in life—and how experimentation creates room for serendipity. [22:34] - What if fear isn’t a red light telling you to stop, but a signal that your identity is expanding? [24:46] - Breaking down the WAVES framework and using it to imagine your next chapter. [25:40] - Legacy, regret, and asking yourself what you still want to experience while you have the opportunity. [28:14] - How fear of the unknown sends us rushing into problem-solving—and why pausing can change everything. [30:36] - Authoring your own story instead of following the career ladder, expectations, and “shoulds.” [31:37] - Why “retirement” may be the wrong word entirely. Welcome to rewirement. [34:59] - Johanna’s powerful reminder: rest isn’t the opposite of purpose—it may be the doorway to it. If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share Insights from the Couch with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more! Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book 🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season.  Come join us—we’d love to have you! 👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/ Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book Recognized by FeedSpot: Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

  3. Sep 30

    Ep. 119: Bad Days, Birthdays, and Breakthroughs

    Some days just feel heavy. You’re discouraged, comparing yourself to everyone around you, questioning your progress, and suddenly your brain has decided everything is terrible. We’ve both been there—and in this birthday episode, we’re talking about what actually helps us move through a bad day without pretending we’re fine or forcing ourselves into positivity. We also get into the very midlife realities of getting older, becoming more aware of time and mortality, figuring out what we want the “back nine” of life to look like, and why having something to anticipate can make such a difference. Plus, we talk anxiety, gratitude, career disappointment, regret versus disappointment, and the surprising lesson Laura pulled from Good to Great about resilience, patience, and staying out of the dreaded “doom loop.” Episode Highlights [0:03] - What to do when you’re having a bad day and everything feels heavy [1:21] - Birthday reflections, getting settled, and why a quiet day can be the perfect celebration in midlife [4:35] - How what we consider “fun” changes as we get older [5:18] - Kids moving farther away and the surprisingly existential side of becoming an empty nester [7:29] - Feeling grateful to be alive, healthy, and increasingly aware of how precious time really is [8:16] - Turning 49, mortality, aging parents, and realizing there may be fewer healthy years ahead than we imagine [10:47] - Careers heating up in midlife while simultaneously thinking about retirement and the next season of life [12:48] - European summers, slowing down, and intentionally designing the life we want [13:34] - Why “anticipation is my drug of choice”—and the power of having something to look forward to [15:18] - Have we lost the ability to anticipate anything in an instant-gratification world? [16:49] - Anxiety, negativity bias, and learning to notice what’s actually beautiful in your life right now [17:50] - Gratitude as a way to shift your attention without dismissing difficult emotions [18:35] - Colette’s really bad day: career comparison, disappointment, envy, and feeling behind the pack [21:56] - Laura’s bad-day rants and why sometimes tomorrow genuinely feels completely different [23:19] - Why trying to cheerlead yourself out of difficult feelings can backfire [24:42] - Taking useful information from disappointment—and why regret may hurt more than trying and failing [25:42] - The power of “not yet” and lessons from Jim Collins’ Good to Great [26:57] - The Stockdale Paradox: accepting reality while maintaining faith that things can work out [28:37] - The “flywheel” versus the “doom loop”—and what both can teach us about our own goals [29:17] - Why a good kvetch can help, as long as you don’t set up permanent residence there [30:45] - Patience, momentum, anticipation, and staying excited enough about your goals to keep going [31:01] - Our reminder for your next bad day: feel it, reach out, don’t overthink it—and remember tomorrow may feel completely different If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share Insights from the Couch with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more! Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book 🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season.  Come join us—we’d love to have you! 👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/ Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book Recognized by FeedSpot: Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

  4. Sep 23

    Ep. 118: The 6 Core Childhood Wounds and How They're Keeping You Stuck with Dr. Galit Atlas

    Have you ever wondered why you keep choosing emotionally unavailable people, getting stuck in the same relationship patterns, or craving closeness while simultaneously being terrified of it? So much of what drives us in our adult relationships is happening beneath the surface—and often, the survival strategies that helped us as children become the unconscious patterns we repeat as adults. In this episode, we sit down with renowned psychoanalyst and bestselling author Dr. Galit Atlas to talk about her new book, Come Closer, and the six core childhood wounds we carry into adulthood: the frightened child, melancholic child, ashamed child, invisible child, guilty child, and chosen child. We get personal about our own childhood roles (because of course we do!) and explore emotional unavailability, parentification, shame, intimacy, vulnerability, and why understanding the child we once were can completely change the way we see ourselves and our relationships today. Episode Highlights [0:03] - Why do we keep repeating the relationship patterns we desperately want to change? [2:04] - Dr. Galit Atlas explains how childhood experiences, defenses, and survival strategies become adult relationship patterns. [4:11] - Laura gets personal about being both the “chosen” and “invisible” child—and how those roles still show up in adulthood. [6:06] - What psychoanalysis actually is and why what we see on the surface may be a defense against deeper feelings. [10:32] - Why part of us wants self-awareness while another part is really, really afraid of what we might discover. [13:58] - Meet the six childhood wounds—and why most of us carry more than one. [16:50] - The invisible child: the urge to disappear while secretly longing to be truly seen and known. [18:37] - The chosen child, parentification, and the complicated adult consequences of being a parent’s confidant or caretaker. [23:31] - Colette opens up about being her father’s confidant as a child and why feeling “special” can make the chosen-child dynamic so difficult to recognize. [26:14] - When childhood wounds overlap: being chosen, unseen, and emotionally responsible for others at the same time. [27:42] - Why we can desperately crave intimacy and still unconsciously choose relationships where true closeness feels impossible. [29:24] - Childhood wounds aren’t always trauma: how ordinary losses, family chaos, illness, divorce, and emotional disconnection shape us. [32:15] - The ashamed child, fear of rejection, cycles of blame, and the pursuit of the “perfect” partner. [35:54] - How do we actually heal? Giving the child inside us a “seat at the table” and hearing our story from their perspective. [39:57] - Recognizing when a wounded child has “the wheel” in our adult relationships. [41:13] - Why even years of therapy and self-work don’t mean we’re finished discovering our unconscious patterns. [42:50] - The melancholic child: unprocessed loss, separation anxiety, and the surprising ways childhood grief can repeat in adult relationships. [47:42] - How curiosity, compassion, and awareness can help us challenge old relationship patterns and move toward authentic self-acceptance. Links & Resources Wild Analysis with Galit Atlas: wildanalysiswithgalitatlas.substack.com Dr. Galit Atlas’ Website: www.drgalitatlas.com If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share Insights from the Couch with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more! Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book 🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season.  Come join us—we’d love to have you! 👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/ Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book Recognized by FeedSpot: Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

  5. Sep 16

    Ep. 117: Looking at Your Relationship with Alcohol

    Alcohol is so normalized in our culture that it can be surprisingly hard to tell when a casual habit has quietly become a coping mechanism. In this episode, we’re having an honest, judgment-free conversation about women, alcohol, and midlife—and asking a question that’s worth considering no matter where you fall on the spectrum: Is alcohol actually serving you anymore? We talk about the nightly wine creep, using alcohol to manage anxiety and stress, drinking as a reward or social lubricant, binge drinking, tolerance, and the subtle signs that your relationship with alcohol may be changing. We also get personal about our own experiences and explore why midlife can be such an important time to get curious about old coping mechanisms, what we’re trying not to feel, and whether it might be time to reset the table. Episode Highlights [0:03] - Why we’re finally talking about women, alcohol, and our relationship with drinking at midlife [1:54] - Colette opens up about leaning on wine and cigarettes as coping mechanisms during her divorce [3:52] - Why being high-functioning doesn’t necessarily mean your relationship with alcohol isn’t problematic [5:54] - Growing up in a culture where heavy drinking was normalized—and how those early messages stick with us [8:09] - The “second wave” of alcohol at midlife and how our relationship with drinking can change as we age [9:40] - The nightly wine creep: when a glass while cooking becomes your signal that you’re finally allowed to relax [11:06] - Using alcohol to quiet anxiety, stress, rumination, and difficult relationships [12:42] - Sleep disruption, rebound anxiety, and the ways alcohol can leave us feeling worse instead of better [14:14] - “I deserve this”: when alcohol becomes the reward for surviving another exhausting day [14:47] - Weekend binge drinking, blackouts, and when getting wasted becomes synonymous with having fun [16:35] - Laura gets personal about how problematic binge drinking affected her marriage [17:27] - Why alcohol can be so compelling as a coping mechanism—and how tolerance and dependence can creep up on us [20:35] - Signs worth paying attention to: exceeding your own limits, increasing tolerance, and creating rules around drinking [21:52] - Hiding, minimizing, sneaking, or becoming protective of your alcohol use [22:46] - When you feel like you need alcohol to sleep, socialize, have sex, relax, or tolerate difficult emotions [25:05] - Listening when someone you trust expresses concern about your drinking [25:26] - An important warning about alcohol dependence and why suddenly stopping heavy, regular drinking can be dangerous [26:16] - Moving beyond the label of “alcoholic” and understanding alcohol problems as a continuum [28:47] - Asking ourselves the bigger midlife question: Do I want to reset my relationship with alcohol? [29:48] - Experimenting with changing familiar drinking patterns when it is medically safe to do so [30:21] - Colette reflects on going an entire year without alcohol—and why she’s still questioning whether she wants it in her life [31:52] - Looking underneath the drinking habit at the feelings, fears, and experiences we may be trying to avoid If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share "Insights from the Couch" with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more! Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book 🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season.  Come join us—we’d love to have you! 👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/ Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book Recognized by FeedSpot: Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

  6. Sep 9

    Ep. 116: Do I Need Meds? An Honest Conversation About Psychiatry, Diagnosis & Mental Health with Dr. Brady Bradshaw

    With one in six American adults now taking an antidepressant, we wanted to ask some big questions: Are we overmedicating? Are we overdiagnosing? When is medication genuinely helpful—and when might what we’re feeling simply be an appropriate response to a difficult season of life? We’re joined by our dear friend and incredibly talented psychiatrist, Dr. Brady Bradshaw, for a nuanced conversation about modern psychiatry, depression, anxiety, SSRIs, mental health diagnoses, and the role medication can play alongside therapy. We also get into ADHD, OCD, personality disorders, medication side effects, and the important distinctions between postpartum depression, postpartum anxiety, and postpartum psychosis. If you’ve ever wondered whether medication might help you—or worried about what taking it means—this episode offers a thoughtful, humanistic perspective. Episode Highlights [0:03] - Are antidepressants being overprescribed? We open up the conversation around modern psychiatry, diagnoses, medication, and mental health. [2:01] - Moving beyond the “chemical imbalance” explanation and looking at the many layers that can contribute to depression and anxiety. [5:14] - Why a good psychiatric evaluation doesn’t automatically mean walking away with a prescription. [6:37] - SSRIs for depression and anxiety: why they’re still considered a first-line treatment, how long they can take to work, and other medication options. [8:47] - When life itself hurts: how do we distinguish normal emotional pain from symptoms that may benefit from medication? [11:41] - Colette shares her own resistance to psychiatric medication during her divorce—and why a short course ultimately helped her cope, sleep, parent, and function. [14:36] - Medication and therapy together: why reducing symptoms can sometimes make it possible to do deeper therapeutic work. [17:18] - Challenging the idea that you have to be completely falling apart before medication is worth considering. [19:00] - “You can still go touch grass and take Lexapro.” Dr. Bradshaw explains which mental health conditions may particularly benefit from medication. [20:42] - OCD and ADHD: how symptoms can affect daily functioning and relationships—and when medication can be transformative. [22:37] - Personality, temperament, anxiety, and medication: what medication can and can’t change. [26:14] - Personality disorders versus mood and anxiety disorders, and why the timeline of symptoms matters in diagnosis. [29:25] - The real value of a thoughtful mental health diagnosis: informing treatment rather than defining your identity. [30:51] - “You’re not marrying the medication.” Can you eventually come off psychiatric medication? [32:03] - Withdrawal symptoms, “brain zaps,” and why tapering medication carefully with medical guidance matters. [33:09] - Postpartum depression and postpartum psychosis: what women and their loved ones need to know. [35:12] - Recognizing postpartum psychosis, why it’s considered a medical emergency, and what symptoms can look like. [38:24] - Intrusive thoughts versus psychosis: an important distinction in postpartum anxiety and mental health. [40:32] - Why seeking treatment for postpartum depression and anxiety can also support the parent-child attachment bond. [41:56] - Why therapy, medication, and healthy lifestyle choices don’t have to be either/or. [43:18] - Where psychiatry can go wrong: polypharmacy, treating medication side effects with more medication, and the importance of reassessing treatment. [45:24] - Why finding a provider who takes the time to understand the whole person can make all the difference. Links & Resources Dr. Brady Bradshaw, MD: www.bradybradshawmd.com If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share "Insights from the Couch" with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more! Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book 🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season.  Come join us—we’d love to have you! 👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/ Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book Recognized by FeedSpot: Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

  7. Sep 2

    Ep. 115: Lindsay Clancy: Postpartum depression, media, and mental health

    In this episode, we’re tackling a heavy, complicated, and deeply divisive conversation: the Lindsey Clancy case and what it brings up about postpartum depression, postpartum psychosis, maternal mental health, and the ways our systems may be failing women. As two therapists, we unpack the difficulty of assessing someone’s mental state from the outside, the limits of psychiatric intervention, and why this case has become such a lightning rod online. But because this is us, we also wander into a little potpourri—from Colette’s husband rupturing his bicep moving the world’s most expensive dust collector (aka her Peloton), to how defensiveness can derail a relationship in seconds, the darker side of social media and true crime culture, and, yes, Harry and Meghan. Underneath it all is a bigger question: Are we taking good enough care of one another? This is a raw conversation about guilt, mental health, motherhood, relationships, social media, and why we could all stand to give each other a little more grace. Episode Highlights [0:03] - Setting the stage for a sensitive conversation about the Lindsey Clancy case, women’s mental health, and everything else on our minds. [2:07] - How Colette’s unused Peloton led to Steve’s major bicep injury—and an unexpected lesson in guilt and defensiveness. [3:25] - Catching the urge to defend yourself before it turns a misunderstanding into an unnecessary argument. [5:55] - Laura’s childhood story about an ill-advised swing-set game and the very human experience of feeling responsible when someone gets hurt. [10:33] - Turning to the Lindsey Clancy trial and the heartbreaking questions surrounding postpartum depression, psychosis, criminal responsibility, and maternal mental health. [13:59] - Why postpartum depression can be so difficult to recognize—even when someone has support and people know they’re struggling. [18:54] - Murder-suicide, severe depression, and why determining someone’s mental state at a specific moment can be extraordinarily complicated. [20:52] - Our own experiences with postpartum depression and anxiety—and how little anyone asked about our mental health after becoming mothers. [22:05] - Why getting women appropriate mental health care isn’t as simple as telling someone to seek help or assuming hospitalization is always an option. [25:04] - The isolation of new motherhood, intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and the pressure to look like everything is fine. [27:27] - Discussing altruistic filicide, suicide, unbearable psychological suffering, and the disturbing rise of murder-suicide cases. [29:02] - What other societies can teach us about community, healthcare, family support, and creating stronger safety nets. [31:48] - The dark side of true crime culture and what happens when tragedy becomes content, clicks, and social media entertainment. [35:21] - Why online pile-ons can become dangerous for someone who may already be struggling with their mental health. [37:13] - A pivot to Harry and Meghan, public scrutiny, conflicting narratives, and whether multiple things can be true at the same time. [43:07] - From the enormous to the everyday: everybody is dealing with something, whether we can see it or not. [44:39] - Our takeaway for the week: give people grace, assume the best instead of the worst, and just be kind. If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share Insights from the Couch with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more! Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book 🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season.  Come join us—we’d love to have you! 👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/ Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book Recognized by FeedSpot: Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

  8. Aug 26

    Ep. 114: You Can't Think Your Way Out of Your Feelings with Chelsea Horton

    Are you actually feeling your feelings—or are you really good at thinking about them? In this episode, we’re joined by somatic coach, educator, and Healing Embodied founder Chelsea Horton to explore why insight alone doesn’t always create change. We unpack what Chelsea calls “thought-feeling fusion” and “emotional constipation,” why so many of us automatically analyze, judge, or suppress emotions, and what can happen when we learn to let the body do what it naturally knows how to do. We also get into anxiety, nervous system regulation, body awareness, sensuality, and Chelsea’s love of pole dancing as a path toward embodiment and self-expression. Whether you’re a big thinker who lives like a “floating head in a jar,” someone who feels everything intensely, or someone who struggles to feel much at all, this conversation offers a different way to relate to your emotions—and your body. Episode Highlights [0:03] - Are you feeling your feelings—or just analyzing them? [2:39] - Why emotions happen in the body and the “floating head in a jar” problem [5:15] - Understanding thought-feeling fusion and why we become “emotionally constipated” [8:43] - Why feeling can be scary and how to build your capacity for body awareness [13:32] - Why we can’t selectively numb emotions—and what it really means to feel alive [16:16] - Chelsea shares how pole dancing helped her reclaim sensuality, sexuality, and embodiment [21:32] - Using movement and somatic work to move through shame and insecurity [24:11] - How staying with bodily sensations can transform our relationship with anxiety [27:44] - Learning to feel as a skill—and why you can eventually practice it on your own [31:42] - Making friends with anxiety and recognizing the gifts inside an anxious mind [34:37] - Practical body-awareness exercises for highly sensitive people and those who feel numb [38:42] - Where to begin with somatic work: building a relationship with your body instead of trying to “fix” it Links & Resources www.healingembodied.com/connect www.facebook.com/groups/embodiedleaderparadigm If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share Insights from the Couch with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more! Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book 🎙️ Love the podcast? Come talk about episodes with us inside The Midlife Chat. It’s a free, private community just for women at midlife who want to keep these conversations going. We’ve created this space for real talk, fresh resources, and honest connection—where you can share ideas and resources, ask questions, and get support from women navigating the same season.  Come join us—we’d love to have you! 👉 Join The Midlife Chat here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/795863256460970/ Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book Recognized by FeedSpot: Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts

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Insights from the Couch is your go-to podcast for smart, self-aware women in midlife navigating perimenopause, burnout, marriage shifts, identity changes, and the emotional chaos of “What now?” Hosted by best friends and seasoned therapists Colette Fehr and Laura Bowman, this is where therapy meets real life — bold conversations, hard truths, and powerful tools to help you get unstuck and come alive.Whether you're questioning your relationship, struggling with empty nest, battling people-pleasing or perfectionism, or just feeling flat and disconnected from yourself — this show is for you.Colette and Laura bring decades of clinical experience (and lived midlife wisdom) to every episode. Expect real talk on the things no one prepares you for: midlife reinvention, perimenopause and hormone shifts, marriage and divorce, boundaries, friendships, confidence, identity loss, and what it actually takes to build a life you want at this stage — not just one you tolerate.This is where smart women get unstuck and come alive.🎧 New episodes every week🌟 Join the Midlife Masterclass: insightsfromthecouch.org/group-coaching-program🩷 Grab your free guide: The Midlife Roadmap — 7 Skills to Get Unstuck and Come Alive👉 Follow us on Instagram: @insightsfromthecouch

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