When Depression is in Your Bed℠

Trish Sanders, LCSW
  • 4.9 (8)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

When Depression Is in Your Bed℠ is a podcast about what happens when life gets hard and how we find our way back to connection. Hosted by Trish Sanders, Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Certified Advanced Imago Relationship Therapist and Relationship Coach, each episode explores the complex relationship between our nervous systems, our relationships, and our emotional well-being. Through a blend of personal stories, professional insights, and practical tools, Trish tackles topics such as depression, communication, perfectionism, neurodivergence, self-trust, conflict, repair, empathy, boundaries, attachment, nervous system regulation, and relational healing. With honesty, warmth, and a deep belief in people's capacity to grow, Trish helps listeners understand not only why they get stuck, but how meaningful change becomes possible. Whether you're struggling with depression, feeling disconnected from yourself or your partner, or simply trying to navigate life with more awareness and compassion, this podcast offers a roadmap back to connection, again and again.

  1. 6h ago

    #92 Here We Go Again: Looking Closer When It Feels Like Nothing Has Changed

    Have you ever found yourself thinking, “Here we go again,” just when you thought your relationship was finally making progress? Maybe you've been working on yourself, communicating differently, or finding new ways to connect with your partner. And yet, suddenly, there's that familiar hurt, disappointment, or disconnection. It feels like you're right back where you started. But what if you're not? When something feels familiar, it's easy to assume that nothing has changed. Yet the feelings we recognize so quickly may be showing up in circumstances that are quite different from the past. And the stories we tell ourselves about what's happening may not capture everything that's actually going on. In this episode, I share something my husband, Ben, and I have been navigating in our own relationship. Through the lens of The Road to Reconnection™, we explore how familiar relationship patterns develop, why meaningful change doesn't always feel like progress, and how even small moments of participating differently can contribute to new possibilities between partners. In this episode, you'll learn: Why familiar feelings of disconnection don't necessarily mean your relationship is back where it started.How old emotional experiences and the stories we tell ourselves can shape our understanding of what's happening today.Why personal growth and meaningful relationship progress don't always happen at the same pace.How our everyday choices can reinforce familiar relationship patterns or help create new ones.Why changing your own response doesn't guarantee a different response from your partner, and why that doesn't make your efforts meaningless.How looking more closely at what's happening within you, between you, and around you can help you recognize possibilities you might otherwise overlook.Because sometimes the road you're traveling feels incredibly familiar, even when you're not quite where you used to be. And recognizing that difference may open up possibilities you hadn't yet considered. For support in how to have deeper connections and better communication in the relationships that matter most in your life, follow the host, Trish Sanders, on https://www.instagram.com/trish.sanders.lcsw or https://www.linkedin.com/in/trish-sanders-lcsw07652.

  2. Oct 21

    #91 Conversations That Connect: Creating Emotional & Sexual Intimacy

    What if the conversations you've been avoiding could actually bring you closer to the people you love? When something feels difficult in a relationship, we often approach the conversation as a problem to solve, a disagreement to resolve, or something uncomfortable we just need to get through. But what if the conversation itself could become an opportunity for connection? What if sharing something vulnerable didn't have to mean blaming someone? What if understanding another person's perspective didn't require setting aside your own feelings? And what if talking about sex could actually be a pleasant, connecting experience rather than a conversation focused on what's wrong? Sometimes, the most meaningful moments of intimacy happen when we make room for both people's experiences, even when those experiences are different. In this episode, Trish shares two personal experiences that revealed just how powerful these conversations can be, and why the way we approach sensitive topics can make such a difference in our relationships. In this episode, you'll learn: Why understanding someone's intentions doesn't mean your own feelings of hurt don't matter.How making room for your own emotional experience can strengthen both your relationships with others and your relationship with yourself.Why vulnerable conversations don't have to revolve around blame, fault, or deciding who's right.How conversations about difficult subjects can become experiences of emotional connection rather than simply opportunities to solve problems.Why talking about sexual challenges can feel especially vulnerable, and how focusing primarily on what's wrong may limit opportunities for connection.How conversations about sex can include curiosity, warmth, appreciation, and even enjoyment.Why both partners' experiences, preferences, needs, and boundaries deserve room in conversations about physical and sexual intimacy.How the Imago Dialogue process can support deeper understanding and connection, even when the subject feels sensitive or challenging.Sometimes, the conversation isn't just a way to get to greater intimacy. The conversation itself can be an experience of intimacy. Explore Satisfying Sex for Committed Couples If you'd like an opportunity to experience these kinds of conversations with your partner, registration is open for Satisfying Sex for Committed Couples, an online, Imago-based workshop that Trish Sanders, LCSW is certified to present. This educational and experiential workshop offers committed partners a structured, supportive opportunity to explore physical and sexual intimacy through guided dialogues, practiced privately together from the comfort of home. Whether you're hoping to deepen an already satisfying intimate relationship or explore an area that has felt challenging, you're invited to learn more. Upcoming workshops: November 2026 and January 2027, with additional dates planned. Workshop information and registration: www.wholefamilynj.com/satisfyingsex Additional resource: Satisfying Sex for Committed Couples, a book by Sophie Slade, Ph.D and David Haworth or https://www.amazon.com/Satisfying-Committed-Couples-Sophie-Slade If you're listening after the dates listed above, visit the workshop link for information about currently available offerings. For support in how to have deeper connections and better communication in the relationships that matter most in your life, follow the host, Trish Sanders, on https://www.instagram.com/trish.sanders.lcsw or https://www.linkedin.com/in/trish-sanders-lcsw07652.

  3. Oct 14

    #90 The Grief in Growth: When Mourning the Past Comes With Moving Forward

    Have you ever finally figured something out about yourself, only to find yourself wishing you'd figured it out years ago? Personal growth can be exciting, empowering, and even life-changing. But what happens when your newfound understanding also makes you more aware of everything that came before it? The years you spent struggling. The opportunities you might have missed. The relationships that might have unfolded differently. Or the ways your past experiences continue to affect your life today. Sometimes, the very growth we're so grateful for can bring unexpected grief. And when that happens, we may find ourselves wondering why we can't simply appreciate how far we've come. But what if gratitude and grief aren't competing experiences? What if we can feel proud of our progress, compassionate toward our younger selves, and genuinely sad about what we've been through, all at the same time? In this episode, you'll learn: Why meaningful personal growth can sometimes bring unexpected sadness, regret, or grief.How new awareness can reveal losses and consequences we couldn't fully recognize before.Why making significant discoveries later in adulthood can bring up feelings of being behind or wishing we'd figured things out sooner.How comparing our journeys to other people's transformation stories can stir up grief about the lives we imagine we might have lived.Why understanding our past limitations doesn't mean we have to dismiss the impact they had on our lives.How grief can show up when we look back on past relationships, parenting experiences, and the ways we've affected people we love.Why self-compassion and accountability can coexist with sadness about the past.How we can make room for grief without overlooking our growth, our gratitude, or the possibilities still ahead.We don't have to choose between appreciating how far we've come and mourning what we wish had been different. There may be room for all of it, including hope for what is still possible. For support in how to have deeper connections and better communication in the relationships that matter most in your life, follow the host, Trish Sanders, on https://www.instagram.com/trish.sanders.lcsw or https://www.linkedin.com/in/trish-sanders-lcsw07652.

  4. Oct 7

    #89 When You're So Focused on What's Next That You Miss What's Now Actually Living in Your Life

    How often are you so busy thinking about what's next that you barely notice what's happening right now? There are things that need to get done. People we want to care for. Plans to make, responsibilities to manage, and experiences we're working hard to create. But sometimes, even when the moment changes, some part of us is still caught up in What's next? What's next? What's next? And what might become possible if we notice? In this episode, Trish shares a seemingly small moment during a family day at the Renaissance Faire that helped her recognize a familiar pattern in real time and discover that something different was available. Not an instant, dramatic transformation. Not the absolute end of an old pattern. Just a breath, a bench, some music, a hand to hold, and a few minutes of experiencing the life that was already happening. In this episode, you'll learn: How a nervous system response that is helpful in one moment may continue even after the conditions around us have changed.Why familiar patterns don't need to be judged or eliminated before something new can begin to happen.How simply noticing an old pattern can matter, even when doing something differently isn't yet available.Why understanding what a familiar response has offered us can create more room for compassion rather than shame.How our own patterns can influence our availability for connection with the people we love.Why slowing down can sometimes feel harder than it sounds, especially when staying in motion has served an important purpose.How small moments of doing something differently can begin creating new evidence about what's possible.What it can mean to participate more fully in the relationships and the life you're already living.Oftentimes, change doesn't begin with doing something big. It often begins with noticing where you are, getting curious about what's available now, and discovering that this particular moment doesn't have to unfold exactly the way the familiar ones have before. Because a breath can matter. A few minutes can matter. Reaching for someone's hand can matter. And small moments of change can become part of something much bigger. For support in how to have deeper connections and better communication in the relationships that matter most in your life, follow the host, Trish Sanders, on https://www.instagram.com/trish.sanders.lcsw or https://www.linkedin.com/in/trish-sanders-lcsw07652.

  5. Sep 30

    #88 You Know Better, But Can't Always Do Better: What Makes Change Possible

    Have you ever known exactly what you would like to do differently... and still found yourself unable to do it in the moment? Maybe you understand your patterns. You know your triggers. You've done the therapy, read the books, listened to the podcasts, and gained incredible insight into yourself and your relationships. And yet, sometimes, you still find yourself right back in the same familiar place. So if knowing better isn't always enough to help us do better, what actually makes change possible? In this episode, Trish explores the question that has significantly changed the way she understands growth, relationships, and lasting change. Through personal storytelling, practical nervous-system understanding, and the lens of The Road to Reconnection™, she considers why insight matters, but may not be enough on its own, and what else may influence our ability to participate differently in our lives and relationships. In this episode, you'll learn: Why knowing what would be helpful and having it genuinely available in the moment are not necessarily the same thing.How our conditions can influence our nervous systems, our capacity, and what becomes available to us.Why understanding capacity doesn't mean removing responsibility or accountability.Why trying harder or communicating more isn't always enough to shift a familiar relationship pattern.How meaningful growth can happen through small, imperfect changes that may be easy to overlook.Why new lived experiences can provide new evidence about what is possible.Why familiar doesn't necessarily mean permanent.Introducing The Road to Reconnection™ Assessment This episode also marks something special: the public launch of The Road to Reconnection™ Assessment. This free assessment is designed for partners who love each other and want their relationship to work, but find themselves returning to familiar arguments, reactions, misunderstandings, or emotional distance. Each partner takes the assessment separately, reflecting on their own experience of the relationship. You'll receive an individualized report designed to help you get your bearings, see where you may be on The Roadmap of Relationship™, and understand your current relationship experience with greater clarity and compassion. Take The Road to Reconnection™ Assessment here or at https://innersights.io/trish/assessments/road-to-reconnection. Knowing better matters. But knowing more isn't always what makes something different possible. Sometimes change begins when new experiences give us new evidence that the familiar road isn't the only road available. Because familiar doesn't have to mean permanent. For support in how to have deeper connections and better communication in the relationships that matter most in your life, follow the host, Trish Sanders, on https://www.instagram.com/trish.sanders.lcsw or https://www.linkedin.com/in/trish-sanders-lcsw07652.

  6. Sep 23

    #87 Getting Knocked Down and Finding Your Way Back Up: What Nervous System Flexibility Looks Like

    Have you ever been knocked down by something and wondered, “After all the work I’ve done, why is this still so hard?”  We sometimes imagine that growth will eventually make us so regulated, resilient, and capable that difficult experiences won’t knock us down anymore. But life doesn’t stop bringing challenges just because we’ve grown. We can still feel overwhelmed by something enormous, or find ourselves unexpectedly affected by something that looks relatively small from the outside. So perhaps the question isn’t how to avoid getting knocked down. Perhaps it’s how our relationship with what happens next can begin to change. In this episode, Trish shares two very different experiences that brought her growing capacity to respond to overwhelm into focus. Through personal storytelling and the lens of Polyvagal Theory, she explores what nervous system flexibility can look like when we allow ourselves to be affected by life, recognize what we need, and discover what becomes possible as our circumstances and capacity change. Getting back up isn’t always about doing more. Sometimes it means slowing down, allowing ourselves to rest, or accepting support. And sometimes it means taking a step forward without needing to know how we’ll navigate the entire journey. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why getting knocked down by a difficult experience doesn’t erase the growth you’ve made.How nervous system flexibility differs from staying calm, connected, or capable all the time.Why both withdrawal and constant action can become patterns that leave us feeling stuck.How to begin noticing the difference between temporarily escaping overwhelm and caring for yourself in ways that genuinely restore you.Why knowing what you need doesn’t always mean you have the capacity to do it right away.How rest, compassion, and receiving support can help expand what becomes available to you.Why getting back up may mean participating in your life differently, rather than returning to exactly where you were before.How you can care for yourself and the people you love even when you cannot control what happens next.We don’t have to fight every wave that knocks us down. We don’t have to shame ourselves for being affected by life. And we don’t have to figure out the entire journey before we can begin caring for ourselves in this moment. There may be hard moments ahead. There may be things we wish we could change but simply can’t. And the way forward may not look like the path we would have chosen. But growth can give us more ways to care for ourselves, more ways to find support, and more capacity to respond to life’s challenges in ways that truly support us.  One moment and one step at a time, we can find our own way back up. For support in how to have deeper connections and better communication in the relationships that matter most in your life, follow the host, Trish Sanders, on https://www.instagram.com/trish.sanders.lcsw or https://www.linkedin.com/in/trish-sanders-lcsw07652.

  7. Sep 16

    #86 Counting Every Step Along the Way: Receiving Growth Before You've Fully Arrived

    What happens when you can see that something is changing, but it still isn’t quite where you want it to be? Growth can be easier to recognize when the results are obvious. The old pattern doesn’t happen. The conversation goes differently. Something that used to be hard suddenly feels easier. But so much of real growth happens somewhere in between where we started and where we hope to go. In this episode, Trish continues the conversation about how we recognize progress when growth is still unfolding. Through a recent experience with her own familiar shame spiral and an imperfect but meaningful moment of support from her partner, she explores what it means not only to notice growth, but to actually receive it and let it count. Because receiving growth doesn’t mean declaring the work finished. We can appreciate that something is different while still wanting more. We can recognize our own increased capacity while acknowledging the places where old patterns still show up. And we can receive a partner’s effort without pretending it landed exactly the way we wanted it to. Through personal storytelling, practical neuroscience, and the lens of The Road to Reconnection™, Trish explores how focusing only on what is still missing can make it harder to take in how far we have already come. In this episode, you'll learn: Why an old familiar pattern showing up doesn’t erase the growth that has already happened.What it can look like to have a different relationship with an experience that once overwhelmed you.Why receiving a partner’s growth doesn’t require ignoring what you still need or want.How focusing on the remaining distance can cause us to overlook meaningful change that is already happening.Why our present-day lives and environments may not yet reflect all of the growth that has happened within us.How compassion for where we have been can coexist with continuing to influence where we are going.Why noticing, receiving, and allowing imperfect growth to matter may help support what becomes possible next.We don’t have to wait until we have fully arrived to appreciate how far we’ve traveled. There can still be more road ahead. There can still be things we want to change. There can still be old patterns, messy moments, and places where we wish things looked different. And we can count every step along the way. Because growth does not need to be complete before it matters. For support in how to have deeper connections and better communication in the relationships that matter most in your life, follow the host, Trish Sanders, on https://www.instagram.com/trish.sanders.lcsw or https://www.linkedin.com/in/trish-sanders-lcsw07652.

  8. Sep 9

    #85 The Real Trajectory of Growth When It Feels Like You're Back Where You Started

    Have you ever thought you were finally making progress... only to find yourself right back in a familiar pattern and wonder if anything had really changed at all? Growth can be incredibly encouraging when we can see it happening. But what about the moments that don't look like growth? The argument you thought you'd moved beyond. The reaction you thought you'd changed. The family pattern that seemed to be getting better, until suddenly, there it is again. It can be easy to look at that moment and think, We're right back where we started. But are we? In this deeply personal episode, Trish returns to the family car rides she has shared about in recent episodes. After intentionally creating a new and much more connected experience together, the next family trip didn't begin nearly as well. And that raised a bigger question: How do we actually know whether growth is happening? Through personal storytelling, practical neuroscience, and the lens of The Road to Reconnection™, Trish explores what becomes visible when we stop measuring growth only by whether an individual moment went the way we hoped and begin looking at the larger trajectory. This isn't about putting a positive spin on every difficult experience or insisting that something isn't a setback when it feels like one. It's about getting curious about whether we may sometimes call something a setback because we're measuring the wrong thing. In this episode, you'll learn: Why growth rarely follows the steady upward trajectory we may expect.How a familiar pattern can reappear without necessarily meaning you're back where you started.Why the outcome of a difficult moment isn't the only place to look for evidence of change.How noticing, understanding, responding, recovering, and repairing differently can reveal growth that might otherwise be missed.Why something new can represent meaningful movement even when it doesn't yet look like the outcome you're working toward.How approaching difficult experiences as information can help reveal what you may need for the next step.Why measuring each individual experience as a success or failure can sometimes make continued growth harder.Up close, we may only be able to see the moment we're standing in. The good one. The hard one. The one that felt like progress. The one that made us wonder if we'd lost it. But an individual moment and the trajectory of growth are not the same thing. Sometimes we have to step back far enough to ask not only, Did this go the way I hoped? But also: What was different this time? What became available? What did I understand that I didn't understand before? What did I learn about where I need to go next? Because maybe the question isn't simply whether we moved forward or backward. Maybe it's whether we can learn from where we are now and take the next step from here. For support in how to have deeper connections and better communication in the relationships that matter most in your life, follow the host, Trish Sanders, on https://www.instagram.com/trish.sanders.lcsw or https://www.linkedin.com/in/trish-sanders-lcsw07652.

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4.9
out of 5
8 Ratings

About

When Depression Is in Your Bed℠ is a podcast about what happens when life gets hard and how we find our way back to connection. Hosted by Trish Sanders, Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Certified Advanced Imago Relationship Therapist and Relationship Coach, each episode explores the complex relationship between our nervous systems, our relationships, and our emotional well-being. Through a blend of personal stories, professional insights, and practical tools, Trish tackles topics such as depression, communication, perfectionism, neurodivergence, self-trust, conflict, repair, empathy, boundaries, attachment, nervous system regulation, and relational healing. With honesty, warmth, and a deep belief in people's capacity to grow, Trish helps listeners understand not only why they get stuck, but how meaningful change becomes possible. Whether you're struggling with depression, feeling disconnected from yourself or your partner, or simply trying to navigate life with more awareness and compassion, this podcast offers a roadmap back to connection, again and again.

Information

  • Creator
    Trish Sanders, LCSW
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    93
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 When Depression is in Your Bed℠
  • Show Website
    When Depression is in Your Bed℠

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