Hot Mess Magic

Michelle Burke
  • 5.0 (12)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

You became someone to survive. To belong. To be loved. To keep the peace, keep it together, keep going. It worked, you’re here. But the identity you built to get through your life started running it. Hot Mess Magic is the conversation about the gap. Each week Michelle Burke sits with people willing to say the true thing out loud. Not the curated version. What’s underneath. The patterns mistaken for personality. The stories inherited before you could choose. The roles played so long they stopped feeling like roles. These are the conversations that usually stay private, about who you became, who you actually are, and the moment you realize the two no longer match. No steps. No homework. No one here to fix you. You were never broken. Just the clean cut of finally hearing it named. New episodes every Friday.

  1. 2h ago

    Why Does the Wrong Person Feel So Right?

    What if the breakup isn't what hurts most? What if the hardest part is realizing how much of yourself disappeared while you were trying to make someone stay? Jess Hendrick knows the pattern. Confuse chemistry with compatibility. Mistake chaos for connection. Give too much. Become more perfect, more accommodating, more desirable, hoping love will finally feel secure. Until you have to face an uncomfortable question: Who did you become trying to be loved? Jess and Michelle get into the relationship patterns we learn long before dating enters the picture. Childhood dynamics. Perfectionism. Fantasy. Self-abandonment. The familiar pull toward people who activate old wounds. Because sometimes chemistry feels like fireworks when your nervous system is simply recognizing home. And sometimes the person pulling away isn't the real problem. The deeper question is why their withdrawal suddenly becomes evidence you aren't enough. This conversation goes into what happens when you stop looking outside yourself for safety, start recognizing your own patterns, and realize healthy relationships can feel surprisingly unfamiliar. WHAT YOU'LL HEARWhy chemistry can feel powerful while compatibility is nowhere in sightHow childhood patterns can shape who feels familiar in loveThe connection between perfectionism and trying to earn loveWhy fantasy can make you attached before you truly know someoneWhat happens when someone pulls away and your first instinct is to blame yourselfWhy a calmer relationship can initially feel boringThe uncomfortable moment when you realize you're the common denominator TIMESTAMPS1:23 The part of heartbreak most people don't talk about 5:23 Chemistry vs. compatibility 12:19 The version of Jess who thought perfection could earn love 18:35 Becoming the common denominator 31:14 When you outsource your safety to a relationship 39:28 Fantasy, dating, and ignoring what your body knows 46:55 Are you afraid of being alone, or meeting yourself? 50:14 The moment Jess stopped pretending THE QUESTIONWhere have you abandoned yourself in an attempt to make someone stay? KEEP THE CONVERSATION GOINGFollow Hot Mess MagicJoin the Hot Mess Magic Community https://www.skool.com/hot-mess-magic-1323 Connect with Michelle IG - @michelleaburke Connect with Jess IG @jesshendrickcoaching/ Resources Mentioned Jess' Free Relationship Quiz - https://www.jesshendrick.com/ Danielle Laporte's White Hot Truth THIS EPISODE WAS POWERED BY Riverside Hot Mess Magic’s online recording studio https://riverside.sjv.io/hotmessmagic Gloci Glow and Debloat. https://getgloci.com/MICHELLE-BURKE Micro Journey Live Life Vividly Use code MBURKE for 20% off https://themicrojourney.com/?ref=mburke Some links may be affiliate links, meaning HMM may earn a commission if you purchase through them.

  2. Sep 2

    Who Are You When Money Stops Making You Feel Safe?

    What happens when you hand someone else the power to decide what your life looks like? Trish Ramirez knows money and dragsters. This drag car racer has spent more than 35 years in the financial industry, helping women understand money, build wealth, and change the way they think about their finances. But there was a time when Trish knew what she wanted and didn't trust herself enough to fight for it. She wanted to buy a house. Someone she trusted told her everything would be fine. It wasn't. And years later, she found herself rebuilding her life after divorce and asking a much bigger question than what happened to the house: Why didn't I trust myself? In this conversation, Trish and Michelle talk about money, financial independence, relationships, divorce, power, and the stories we're handed about who should manage the money. Because money isn't just numbers. It can become tied to your identity. Your confidence. Your relationships. Your sense of safety. And sometimes, the hardest financial decision isn't deciding what to do with your money. It's admitting you've been handing your power to someone else. We also get into the money stories we inherit as children, why even a financial professional can still feel anxious looking at her own numbers, and what happens when losing a job or relationship forces you to question who you thought you were. And then Trish reveals a part of herself you probably wouldn't expect. Because the financial advisor sitting across from Michelle isn't the whole story. Neither of us is. We're not our job titles. We're not our bank accounts. And we're sure as hell not the roles we've been handed. So what happens when you finally trust yourself enough to take your power back? Listen to the conversation. If something in this episode made you see your own relationship with money differently, share it with someone who needs the conversation. Follow Hot Mess Magic wherever you listen to podcasts, and join the Hot Mess Magic Community to keep the conversation going. Because sometimes the money conversation isn't really about money. It's about who gets to decide. Connect Michelle Burke IG - @michelleaburke Trish Ramirez IG - @patricialynnramirez Website - Ramirez Wealth Management

  3. Aug 21

    The Moment You Realize You Can’t Keep Doing It This Way

    What happens when the thing you've been using to survive starts becoming the thing that's destroying you? Joanne Kminsky knows what it means to keep functioning while everything underneath you is falling apart. She lost her father young. She struggled with grief she didn't know how to process. She found ways to numb it. She kept working. Kept parenting. Kept moving. From the outside, she was functioning. Inside, something was very different. Then one night, something happened with her daughter that forced Joanne to see what she could no longer look away from. That moment changed the direction of her life. In this conversation, Joanne and Michelle talk about grief, addiction, parenting, asking for help, and the identities we build around being the person who can handle everything. They also go somewhere unexpected: into the classroom, the education system, and what happens when the work you once loved becomes a place where you can no longer recognize yourself. Because sometimes the hardest part isn't knowing that something has to change. It's admitting that you can't keep doing it this way. This conversation is for anyone who's functioning on the outside while quietly knowing something has to give. You don't have to know what comes next to know that this isn't working anymore. If this conversation hit somewhere a little too close to home, don't just scroll past it join the Hot Mess Magic Community and keep the convo going. Follow Hot Mess Magic wherever you listen to podcasts, and send this episode to the person who needs to hear it. Because sometimes the conversation we need most is the one we keep avoiding. Connect Michelle - IG @michelleaburke Joanne - FB @skypereadingtutor This episode includes discussion of suicide, addiction, grief, and mental health struggles. If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction or mental health, please reach out to a qualified mental health or addiction professional or a local crisis/support service. You don't have to figure it out alone.

  4. Aug 14

    Which Mask Are You Done Wearing?

    You are not the same person you were at 10. So why are you still wearing the mask you put on back then? We’re in an eclipse window between the August 12 solar eclipse in Leo and the August 27–28 lunar eclipse in Pisces. And this episode came together while I was walking on the beach, completely different from what I planned to record. Because maybe that’s the point. We evolve. We change our minds. We outgrow things. And sometimes the identity that once protected us becomes the identity we can no longer live inside. The good girl. The strong one. The successful one. The easy one. The one who keeps it together. Which one are you still being? And which one are you done wearing? This is a beach walk and talk about identity, masks, evolution, and what happens when you finally see the parts of yourself you’ve been hiding. Drop the facade. Own the mess. Remember who the f**k you are. Hot Mess Magic is a podcast about the identities we build, the masks we wear, and what happens when we stop pretending. New episodes every Friday.

  5. Jul 31

    The Woman You Judge Might Be the Woman You Understand | A Former Stripper on Confidence, Identity & Worth

    The woman you judge might be the woman you understand. We are quick to decide who someone is based on the role they play. The stripper. The executive. The entrepreneur. The woman who seems to have it all together. The woman whose choices don't make sense to us. But what if the story we've been told isn't the whole story? In this conversation, Michelle sits down with Morgan Barkus, a former stripper who spent 13 years in the adult entertainment industry before becoming a confidence coach and entrepreneur. What unfolds is not a conversation about stripping. It's a conversation about identity, perception, confidence, and the masks we all learn to wear to survive. Morgan shares what the industry taught her about boundaries, self-worth, rejection, sales, and the power of being seen for more than the role someone assumes you play. Together, Michelle and Morgan challenge the beliefs we carry about empowerment, judgment, success, and what it means to truly own who you are. Because sometimes the person we are quickest to judge is the person who has something important to teach us. In this episode:Why the common narrative about women in the adult entertainment industry misses the deeper truthWhat 13 years as a stripper taught Morgan about confidence and resilienceThe surprising connection between stripping, entrepreneurship, and salesWhy confidence has less to do with appearance and more to do with knowing your worthHow rejection can become one of your greatest strengthsWhy being seen, heard, and understood is something everyone cravesThe difference between empowerment and simply adapting to surviveHow the roles we play can become mistaken for who we are This conversation will challenge the assumptions you hold about other people—and maybe the assumptions you've been carrying about yourself. Because the masks we judge in others are often the same masks we wear ourselves. Connect Michelle Burke IG - https://www.instagram.com/michelleaburkeWhat Identity did you create to survive? - Find out here --> michelle-a-burke.kit.com/themask Morgan Barkus IG - https://www.instagram.com/morganbarkus/Join the Club - https://www.morganbarkus.com/confidence-club If this conversation made you stop and think, subscribe to Hot Mess Magic for honest conversations about identity, authenticity, and the hidden cost of the masks we wear to survive. Share this episode with someone who's ready to question the stories they've been taught about confidence, success, and what it really means to be seen.

  6. Jul 17

    The Part of Yourself You Abandoned Because It Didn’t Feel Safe | Reclaiming Your Identity

    What happens when you stop trusting a part of yourself you once knew was powerful? In this episode of Hot Mess Magic, Michelle Burke shares a deeply personal story about identity, self-trust, and what happens when we silence a part of ourselves because we’re afraid of how it will be perceived. Michelle opens up about a chapter of her life she hasn’t talked about publicly in this way before — a time when she questioned herself, walked away from something that had been a major part of her identity, and had to confront what it meant to truly remember who she was. Because sometimes the hardest thing to reclaim isn’t a dream, a goal, or a relationship. It’s the parts of ourselves we decided weren’t safe to show. In this episode, Michelle explores: • The identities we build and what happens when they become who we are • Why being judged or misunderstood can cause us to hide parts of ourselves • The difference between protecting yourself and abandoning yourself • How your nervous system can keep you safe while also keeping you stuck • What it means to come back to yourself after losing your way The question Michelle wants you to sit with: What part of yourself have you abandoned because somewhere along the way it stopped feeling safe to be seen? Because maybe the thing you’ve been hiding isn’t the thing that needs to disappear. Maybe it’s the thing you’re meant to remember. Join Michelle inside The Remembering — a space to drop the facade and reconnect with who you are underneath the identities, expectations, and stories you’ve carried. Let’s remember who the f**k we are together. Join Here

  7. Jun 26

    Why You Can't Heal Like a Hustler — Jess Robbins on What Happens When You Try

    There's a specific kind of person who gets hit by a car at 74 miles an hour, breaks most of their body, and thinks — okay, now I can shower and get back to the office. Not because they're reckless. Because stillness started to feel like failure somewhere along the way. And producing became the only proof they were worth anything. That's Jess Robbins. Sixteen surgeries. Divorce. Bankruptcy. Addiction. All of it shoved into a box labeled deal with this later. Then she rebuilt. Got back to the top of a corporate career. Got the supplements and the water bottle and the genuine commitment to do it right this time. Then she found herself on a cold basement floor, hating everything she'd built. This is what burnout looks like in high achievers who never learned to stop — not a dramatic collapse, but a quiet, efficient rebuilding of the exact same thing that broke them. Same perfectionism. Same patterns. Same proof-of-worth machinery running in the background, unexamined. Jess didn't just burn out. She healed like a hustler. And then she burned out again. If you've ever survived something, rebuilt something, and had a quiet suspicion you rebuilt it wrong, this conversation will name what you already know. In This Episode You'll Explore Why high achievers often rebuild the same cycle after hitting rock bottomWhat it looks like when someone heals with the same energy that burned them outWhy stillness and rest feel like failure to people wired for productionHow a childhood moment of perfectionism can quietly run an entire adult lifeWhy the people who are best at seeing patterns in others are often the last to see their own Listener CTA If this episode named something you've been carrying around without a word for it — follow the show so you don't miss what comes next. And if someone in your life would recognize themselves in this conversation, send it to them. Sometimes the most useful thing isn't advice. It's someone finally saying the thing out loud. Connect with Michelle Website: https://hotmessmagicemedia.com Instagram: @michelleaburke Speaking & Media Inquiries: CLICK HERE Connect with Jess Robbins Instagram: Newsletter CTA The newsletter is where this conversation keeps going between episodes — the stuff that doesn't fit in a caption and shouldn't. No tips. No hacks. No five steps to anything. Just more of the things people are thinking privately and pretending they're not. If that's your kind of mailing list, get on it at : https://michelle-a-burke.kit.com/hotmessmagic Questions Answered In This Episode Why does achieving more not make the feeling of not-enoughness stop? Why do some people keep rebuilding the same patterns after their lives fall apart? What does it feel like to be unable to stop even when your body is demanding it? Why do high-functioning people struggle so much to ask for help? What is the connection between perfectionism in childhood and burnout in adulthood?

  8. Jun 19

    Why Hitting Your Goal Feels Like Nothing (Success Doesn't Feel Like Success Anymore)

    It's the strongest because it does two jobs at once without compromising either. It matches the exact phrasing a person uses when they search this feeling at 11pm, so it's discoverable. And it sounds like Michelle — flat, direct, naming the thing instead of dressing it up. It promises recognition rather than a fix, which is the whole point. The original episode title, The Milestone Felt Like Nothing, is beautiful as the in-show line and works well as a subtitle, but "milestone" is a softer search term than "goal," and leading with the question pulls more curiosity and more search traffic. You hit the thing. The number, the date, the title, the year you swore would feel like something. And then it came — and you felt almost nothing. A flat, confusing is that it? you didn't dare say out loud, because who feels empty at the thing they wanted? In this solo episode, Michelle Burke sits inside that exact nothing. One year of Hot Mess Magic — a milestone she assumed would land like fireworks and instead landed like a Tuesday. What she found underneath wasn't gratitude or regret. It was a pattern. The wedding. The house. The job. The number on the scale. Every finish line you were promised would fix something, and quietly didn't. This isn't about feeling more grateful. It's about the arrival fallacy nobody admits to, the gratitude we all perform for each other in the photo, and the question hiding under every milestone: what were you actually expecting it to fix? You're not broken. You just believed the story. So did everyone smiling next to you. Key Topics Covered The arrival fallacy — why a milestone you ran toward for years can land like an ordinary Tuesday The shame attached to anticlimax, and why "I felt nothing" gets quietly filed under ungrateful Performing gratitude you don't actually feel, and the photo-smile everyone keeps up for everyone else A year reframed as "the residue of not quitting" rather than a triumph — fifty-two arguments with yourself, won by a slim margin The flatness at the finish line as information: the thing you quietly hired a goal to fix that a goal was never going to fix CTA If this put words to something you've been carrying around and not saying — that's the whole reason it exists. Follow Hot Mess Magic so you don't lose the thread. If you've got something real to say, leave a review; the honest ones are the ones worth reading. And if someone in your life smiled in the photo and felt the nothing too, send it to them. They'll know exactly what it's about. Connect with Michelle Website: https://hotmessmagicemedia.com Instagram: @michelleaburke Speaking & Media Inquiries: CLICK HERE Newsletter CTA The newsletter is where this conversation keeps going between episodes — the stuff that doesn't fit in a caption and shouldn't. No tips. No hacks. No five steps to anything. Just more of the things people are thinking privately and pretending they're not. If that's your kind of mailing list, get on it at : https://michelle-a-burke.kit.com/hotmessmagic

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Trailer

5
out of 5
12 Ratings

About

You became someone to survive. To belong. To be loved. To keep the peace, keep it together, keep going. It worked, you’re here. But the identity you built to get through your life started running it. Hot Mess Magic is the conversation about the gap. Each week Michelle Burke sits with people willing to say the true thing out loud. Not the curated version. What’s underneath. The patterns mistaken for personality. The stories inherited before you could choose. The roles played so long they stopped feeling like roles. These are the conversations that usually stay private, about who you became, who you actually are, and the moment you realize the two no longer match. No steps. No homework. No one here to fix you. You were never broken. Just the clean cut of finally hearing it named. New episodes every Friday.

Information

  • Creator
    Michelle Burke
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    57
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2026 Michelle Burke
  • Show Website
    Hot Mess Magic

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