Living in the Aftermath with Lyndsey

Living in the Aftermath
  • 4.8 (19)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Biweekly

Living in the Aftermath is a podcast by a domestic violence survivor, sharing raw and honest conversations about life after trauma. Each episode explores healing, resilience, and the real work of rebuilding. Featuring voices of survivors and the people who’ve walked with us. You’re not alone! This is what healing out loud looks like.

  1. Sep 12

    Before the Breaking Point: The Conversation the Lindsay Clancy Case Started

    The Lindsay Clancy case has started a much bigger conversation about postpartum mental health, intrusive thoughts, motherhood, emotional neglect—and what happens when a woman says she isn’t okay, but doesn’t feel heard. In this episode of Living in the Aftermath, Kaitlyn returns for a raw and deeply personal conversation about what can happen before the breaking point. We talk about the parts of women’s experiences that are often invisible from the outside: functioning while falling apart, carrying the invisible load, begging for help, intrusive thoughts, medical dismissal, emotional neglect, unhealthy relationship dynamics, and the fear that comes with telling someone the truth about what is happening inside your own mind. The Lindsay Clancy case may have started this conversation, but this episode quickly becomes about something much bigger: What happens when women repeatedly say something is wrong—and nobody truly listens? We discuss: • postpartum mental health and intrusive thoughts • the difference between having a thought and wanting to act on it • why women may be afraid to admit they aren't okay • emotional neglect and invisible labor in relationships • what happens when someone is pushed toward a breaking point • why functioning does not always mean someone is okay • the importance of having a partner who advocates for you • whose voices we believe when women describe their own experiences • why compassion and accountability can exist at the same time • what meaningful support can actually look like This conversation is not about excusing harm or minimizing the devastating loss of innocent children. It is about asking harder questions about mental health, motherhood, relationships, support, and whether we are listening early enough. Because maybe the question shouldn't only be: “How did she get to that point?” Maybe we also need to ask: “What happened before the breaking point?” 🎙️ Living in the Aftermath explores the experiences we survive, the things that shape us, and what happens after. If this conversation resonates with you, share it with someone who needs to hear it—and tell us in the comments: Do you think breaking points happen suddenly, or do we just notice them suddenly? If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, postpartum mental health, domestic violence, or feels unsafe, please reach out to a qualified professional or crisis resource in your area. Postpartum Support International (PSI) — 1-800-944-4773; press 1 for Spanish or 2 for English. Text HELP to 800-944-4773 in English or 971-203-7773 in Spanish. Postpartum Support International988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline — Call or text 988. 988 Suicide & Crisis LifelineNational Domestic Violence Hotline — 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text START to 88788. National Domestic Violence HotlineThe Refuge Utah — Domestic Violence 24/7 Helpline: 801-377-5500; Sexual Assault 24/7 Helpline: 801-356-2511. The Refuge Utah

  2. Aug 29

    I Kept Hoping She Would Change: When the Person Who Should Protect You Doesn’t

    I Kept Hoping She Would Change: When the Person Who Should Protect You Doesn’t She told her mother she was being sexually abused. She thought that meant someone would finally protect her. Instead, she spent years hoping the person who was supposed to protect her would change. In this episode of Living in the Aftermath, Lee shares her experience of surviving childhood sexual abuse—and what happened when telling the truth didn't bring the safety, protection, or support she desperately needed. Lee talks openly about growing up as the oldest child, being parentified at a young age, trying to protect her younger siblings, asking repeatedly for mental health support, navigating suicidal thoughts and self-harm, and continuing to hope that one day her mother would become the person she needed her to be. We also explore something many survivors understand deeply: why we keep hoping. Why do we keep waiting for someone to finally choose us? Why do we convince ourselves that maybe if we explain it differently, try harder, need less, become easier to love, or give them one more chance, they'll finally show up? And what happens when we finally realize we cannot make another person change—no matter how desperately we need them to? Lee's story is also one of advocacy, finding validation, learning to extend herself the compassion she so easily gives other survivors, and discovering that healing doesn't mean forgetting what happened. Sometimes healing begins when we stop asking, “How do I make them change?” and start asking, “What do I need now?” CONTENT WARNING This episode contains discussions of childhood sexual abuse, sexual assault, suicidal ideation, self-harm, emotional abuse, neglect, medical trauma, and other potentially distressing experiences. Please listen with care and step away if you need to. IF YOU OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW NEEDS SUPPORT 🇺🇸 National Sexual Assault Hotline — RAINN Available 24/7 for survivors of sexual assault and abuse. Call: 800-656-HOPE (4673) Text: HOPE to 64673 Online chat and additional resources: RAINN.org RAINN provides confidential support, information, and connections to local resources for survivors and their loved ones. 💜 The Refuge Utah — Domestic Violence & Sexual Assault Support 24/7 Domestic Violence Helpline: 801-377-5500 24/7 Sexual Assault Helpline: 801-356-2511 Spanish Sexual Assault Helpline: 801-924-0860 Learn more: therefugeutah.org ❤️ National Domestic Violence Hotline Call: 800-799-SAFE (7233) Text: START to 88788 Online support: thehotline.org Trained advocates can help with safety planning, identifying abuse, finding local resources, and exploring options. 🩵 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, emotional distress, or a mental health crisis: Call or text 988 If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 911 or your local emergency services. You do not have to wait until your situation feels “bad enough” to ask for help. You deserve to be heard, believed, supported, and safe. Living in the Aftermath shares survivor experiences to create education, awareness, connection, and conversations around trauma and healing. The experiences shared by guests are their own. This podcast is not a substitute for professional mental health, medical, or legal advice.

  3. Aug 15

    We Were Taught Love Wrong: Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationship Myths

    What if some of the things we were taught about love and relationships were never actually healthy? “Marriage is hard.” “If they’re jealous, it means they care.” “Love should be unconditional.” “Never go to bed angry.” “People don’t change.” We hear these phrases so often that we rarely stop to question what they actually teach us about love. In this episode of Living in the Aftermath, Lyndsey is joined by Teal Christianson and Ash Hunsaker from The Refuge Utah’s Prevention Team for an honest, relatable conversation about what healthy relationships actually look like—and the relationship myths we may need to unlearn. Together, they talk about the often-confusing space between healthy, unhealthy, and abusive relationships, and why recognizing the difference can be difficult whether you’re a teenager navigating your first relationship or an adult who has been married for years. They dig into boundaries, consent, jealousy, trust, healthy conflict, communication, accountability, emotional safety, and red flags—including why consent doesn’t disappear when a relationship becomes serious or turns into marriage. And this episode is interactive. Grab a piece of paper or your phone and rate yourself as you listen through questions about: BoundariesCommunicationConflictApologies and accountabilityJealousy and trustCan you say no without overexplaining? Can you hear someone else’s boundary without treating it as rejection? Can you disagree without trying to win? Can you apologize without adding a “but”? Can you communicate insecurity without creating rules for someone else? This isn’t a test of whether you’re “good” or “bad” at relationships. These are skills—and skills can be learned, practiced, and strengthened. The conversation also challenges some of the relationship advice many of us grew up hearing and asks an important question: Is this actually love—or have we simply been taught to call it love? Because healthy relationships don’t require you to lose your voice, abandon your boundaries, or sacrifice yourself to prove that you care. Sometimes the healthiest thing we can do is unlearn what we were taught. About The Refuge UtahThe Refuge Utah is a nonprofit rape crisis center and domestic violence service provider serving survivors of domestic violence, sexual assault, stalking, coercion, control, and lack of consent. Its mission is to empower survivors and increase emotional and physical safety through advocacy, education, and trauma-informed services. The Refuge Utah provides survivor-centered services at no cost and offers prevention education in schools and throughout the community, including education about healthy relationships, safe dating, abuse warning signs, and how to help someone who may be in an unsafe relationship. 24/7 Domestic Violence Helpline: (801) 377-5500 24/7 Sexual Assault Helpline: (801) 356-2511 If you are interested in bringing The Refuge Utah’s Prevention Team to a school, college, youth organization, church group, community organization, parent group, or other gathering, reach out to the Prevention Team at prevention@therefugeutah.org for questions or booking information. *Living in the Aftermath is a podcast about the ways trauma shapes us, the things we learn in survival, and what happens as we begin to rebuild. This podcast is for educational and informational purposes and is not a substitute for professional mental health, medical, or legal advice.

  4. Aug 1

    I Raised My Parents Instead of Being Their Child: Growing Up With Addiction, Neglect & Trauma

    What happens when a child becomes the parent? At just 22 years old, Rhiannon has survived more than most people experience in a lifetime. Growing up with parents battling addiction, she learned to protect the very people who were supposed to protect her. After entering foster care as a teenager, losing her father to suicide, and navigating the grief of an estranged relationship with her mother, she found herself asking a heartbreaking question: Who am I when I was never allowed to just be a child? In this deeply honest conversation, we explore how childhood trauma doesn't end when childhood does. It follows survivors into adulthood through people-pleasing, hypervigilance, difficulty trusting others, and the overwhelming feeling of being responsible for everyone else's happiness. Whether you grew up with addicted parents, experienced emotional neglect, or simply felt like you had to grow up too soon, this episode is a reminder that your survival isn't your identity—and healing is possible. In this episode we discuss:Growing up with addicted parentsChildhood trauma and emotional neglectParentification and becoming the caregiverLosing a parent to suicideThe lifelong impact of childhood abuseChild Protective Services (CPS) and child advocacyTrauma responses in adulthoodPeople-pleasing and conflict avoidanceHealing after childhood traumaWhy survivors often become caretakersIf this conversation resonates with you, please consider subscribing, sharing this episode with someone who needs it, and leaving a review. Every share helps another survivor feel a little less alone. ResourcesIf you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence or coercive control, support is available. • The Refuge Utah If you or someone you know is struggling with thoughts of suicide or experiencing a mental health crisis, contact the 988

  5. Jul 18

    He Looked Like Every Parent's Dream Boy: How My Rapist Fooled Everyone

    What if the person everyone trusted was the one who hurt you? In this powerful episode of Living in the Aftermath, Lyndsey Hackford sits down with survivor and advocate Shannon Porter, founder of What They Don't Say, to explore the devastating reality that sexual predators often don't fit the stereotypes we've been taught to fear. After losing her father and brother in a tragic plane crash at just 11 years old, Shannon spent years searching for safety, belonging, and approval. Then she met the man everyone believed was the "perfect Christian boy"—kind, respectful, faith-filled, and trusted by everyone around him. What happened next changed her life forever. Together, Lyndsey and Shannon have an honest conversation about: How childhood trauma shapes our relationshipsWhy predators often appear trustworthyReligious trauma and purity cultureConsent, coercion, and healthy boundariesWhy "good people" can still commit horrific actsHow communities unintentionally enable abuseThe long journey of healing after sexual assaultIf you've ever questioned your own experience, struggled to trust yourself after trauma, or wondered how someone "so nice" could become an abuser, this conversation is for you. Connect with Shannon Porter & What They Don't Say 🌐 What They Don't Say: WhatTheyDontSay.com🎙️ Listen to the What They Don't Say podcast📱 Follow What They Don't Say on Instagram & TikTok☕ Support their work through Buy Me a Coffee📧 Contact Shannon through her official linksAll of Shannon's official resources can be found here: What They Don't Say Linktree ResourcesIf you or someone you know has experienced sexual assault or domestic violence, you are not alone. 💜 The Refuge Utah Supporting survivors of domestic violence through emergency shelter, advocacy, counseling, and community resources. https://refugeutah.org 📞 National Domestic Violence Hotline Call: 800-799-7233 Text START to 88788 https://www.thehotline.org 📞 RAINN (National Sexual Assault Hotline) Call: 800-656-HOPE (4673) https://www.rainn.org If you are in immediate danger, call 911 or your local emergency services. 🎙️ About Living in the Aftermath Living in the Aftermath is a podcast hosted by survivor and advocate Lyndsey Hackford, exploring how trauma shapes decision-making, relationships, and healing. Through honest conversations with survivors, professionals, and advocates, this podcast challenges misconceptions about abuse while offering hope to those rebuilding their lives. If this episode impacted you, please consider: 👍 Like the video 💬 Share your thoughts in the comments 📤 Share this episode with someone who needs it 🔔 Subscribe so you never miss a new conversation #SexualAssaultAwareness #Consent #TraumaHealing #ReligiousTrauma #DomesticViolence

  6. Jul 4

    Her Children Were Murdered After Warning Signs Were Ignored: How Family Court Failed Them

    What happens when warning signs of domestic violence are ignored and family court fails to protect children? In this powerful episode of Living in the Aftermath, I sit down with child safety advocate Hope Hooton to discuss the heartbreaking loss of her children, Alec and Lydia, and how unimaginable tragedy led her to fight for change. Hope shares her experiences with coercive control, emotional abuse, isolation, and why survivors often stay in abusive relationships. Together, we discuss the realities of family court, the importance of putting child safety first, and the advocacy work that led to the passing of Arizona's Alec and Lydia Act. This conversation is difficult, emotional, and incredibly important. Topics discussed: • Domestic violence and coercive control • Family court and child custody • Child safety and protective parents • Emotional and religious abuse • Why survivors stay • Trauma and healing • The Alec and Lydia Act • Family court reform and child advocacy ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ CONNECT WITH HOPE HOOTON ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ 🌿 Follow Hope's journey: Hope's Linktree 📚 Buy Hope's book: "There’s Still Hope: A Journey of Adversity, Tragedy and Unshakable Hope" 🎙️ Listen to Hope's podcast: Voices Against Filicide Podcast 💜 Learn more about Hope's advocacy work: Voices Against Filicide ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ RESOURCES ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, help is available. 💜 National Domestic Violence Hotline: The Hotline Call: 800-799-SAFE (7233) Text: START to 88788 💜 The Refuge Utah: The Refuge Utah 801-377-5500 💜 Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: Childhelp Hotline Call or text: 800-4-A-CHILD (800-422-4453) ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ If this episode moved you, please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, COMMENT, and SHARE. Stories like Hope's create awareness, start conversations, and have the power to save lives. Every child deserves to be safe. #DomesticViolence #FamilyCourt #ChildSafety #HopeHooton #ProtectiveParents #CoerciveControl #AlecAndLydiaAct #TraumaHealing #ChildAdvocacy #LivingInTheAftermath #LyndseyHackford

  7. Jun 21

    The System Took My Children and Called It Healing: A Family Court Horror Story

    What happens when the system meant to protect children becomes the source of their trauma? In this episode of Living in the Aftermath, Lyndsey sits down with Kitty Mayo, founder of Georgia Protective Parents, to discuss her family's experience navigating family court, reunification programs, child advocacy, and the fight to bring children home. After years of advocating for her stepchildren following abuse allegations, Kitty and her husband found themselves facing a system they never expected. What followed was years of separation, staggering financial costs, profound grief, and ultimately a mission to help other families facing similar challenges. Together, Lyndsey and Kitty discuss: • Reunification camps and reunification therapy programs • Family court and child custody challenges • Protective parents and child advocacy • The emotional impact of forced family separation • Healing after family court trauma • Finding purpose through advocacy • Legislative efforts to protect children • The importance of using your voice, even when the system tells you not to This conversation explores difficult questions about child safety, family court reform, trauma, resilience, and what happens when children say they are not being heard. Whether you are a survivor, protective parent, advocate, professional, or simply someone who cares about child welfare, this episode offers an important perspective on a topic many families never hear about until it impacts their own lives. ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ Learn more and connect with Georgia Protective Parents: Website: https://georgiaprotectiveparents.org Linktree: https://linktr.ee/georgiaprotectiveparents Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GeorgiaProtectiveParents Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/georgiaprotectiveparents ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ RESOURCES National Domestic Violence Hotline https://www.thehotline.org Call or Text: 800-799-SAFE (7233) The Refuge Utah https://www.therefugeutah.org Crisis Text Line Text HOME to 741741 https://www.crisistextline.org If you are in immediate danger, call 911 or your local emergency services. ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ DISCLAIMER The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of the host, production team, or affiliated organizations. This podcast is intended for educational and informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, medical, mental health, or professional advice. This episode contains discussions involving domestic violence, child abuse allegations, family court proceedings, trauma, coercive control, and reunification programs. Listener discretion is advised. All individuals discussed are presumed innocent unless proven guilty in a court of law. Experiences shared represent personal perspectives and lived experiences.

  8. Jun 6

    I Trusted Everyone But Myself: The Red Flags That Nearly Destroyed My Life

    In this powerful episode of Living in the Aftermath, Lyndsey sits down with survivor, advocate, and paralegal Lynn Stroud for a raw conversation about the warning signs of abuse that so many people miss until it's too late. From childhood experiences that shaped her understanding of relationships to sexual assault, stalking, reproductive coercion, emotional abuse, family betrayal, and the failures of systems designed to protect survivors, Lynn shares the painful realities of what happens when trauma teaches you to question your own instincts. Together, Lyndsey and Lynn discuss: ✨ Why survivors often trust everyone else's opinions over their own intuition ✨ Reproductive coercion and the hidden forms of abuse many people don't recognize ✨ Family members who defend abusers and silence victims ✨ Stalking, intimidation, and post-separation abuse ✨ Toxic messages like "Marriage is hard" and "Blood is thicker than water" ✨ The family court system and the challenges protective parents face ✨ Healing after abuse and learning to trust yourself again ✨ Building healthy relationships after trauma ✨ Breaking generational cycles and teaching our children healthy boundaries If you've ever wondered why survivors stay, why leaving is so complicated, or how abuse can exist without visible bruises, this episode offers an honest look into the realities many victims face behind closed doors. This conversation is emotional, validating, and ultimately hopeful for anyone navigating life after abuse. ⚠️ CONTENT WARNING / DISCLAIMER This episode contains discussions of: Domestic violenceSexual assaultReproductive coercionStalkingEmotional and psychological abuseTrauma and PTSDFamily court challengesPost-separation abuseViewer and listener discretion is advised. The information shared in this episode is based on personal experiences and opinions and is intended for educational and awareness purposes only. This podcast is not a substitute for legal, medical, mental health, or professional counseling services. 💜 NEED HELP? The Refuge UtahWebsite: The Refuge Utah 24-Hour Crisis Line: 📞 801-377-5500 Text Line: 📱 801-368-7700 National Domestic Violence HotlineWebsite: National Domestic Violence Hotline Call: 📞 800-799-SAFE (7233) Text: 📱 START to 88788 RAINN (Sexual Assault Support)Website: RAINN 24/7 Hotline: 📞 800-656-HOPE (4673) 📸 Instagram: @knowledge_exch_abuse_survivors 💼 LinkedIn: Lynn Stroud LinkedIn Lynn is a survivor, advocate, and paralegal dedicated to helping others recognize the warning signs of abuse, reproductive coercion, coercive control, and post-separation abuse. 🎙️ Podcast Host: Lyndsey Hackford 📸 Instagram: @living.inthe.aftermath 🎥 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Livingintheaftermath Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/living-in-the-aftermath-with-lyndsey/id1832389204

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4.8
out of 5
19 Ratings

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Living in the Aftermath is a podcast by a domestic violence survivor, sharing raw and honest conversations about life after trauma. Each episode explores healing, resilience, and the real work of rebuilding. Featuring voices of survivors and the people who’ve walked with us. You’re not alone! This is what healing out loud looks like.

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