The Psychology of Relationships

Julie Krafchick & Yue Xu
  • 4.4 (108)
  • Relationships
  • Updated Weekly

Every couple has a story: the sparks, the late-night talks, the fights about nothing, and the moments that change everything. So why do some relationships thrive while others fall apart? The answer isn’t luck; it’s psychology. Join Julie Krafchick and Yue Xu, hosts of the hit podcast Dateable and authors of the book 'How to Be Dateable,' as they navigate this next phase of long-term committed relationships. Together with leading experts in the field, they'll explore what science really tells us about love, conflict, and connection — and translate it into tools you can actually use. 

  1. 19h ago

    Relationship, Are You Sure You Want One?: Why Partnership Should Be a Choice, Not a Necessity w/ Simone Milasas and Brendon Watt

    We’re often taught that being in a relationship is the goal—but what if partnership isn’t something we need in order to have a fulfilling life? Julie & Yue are joined by Simone Milasas and Brendon Watt, co-authors of Relationship.: Are You Sure You Want One?, to challenge the idea that being partnered is inherently better than being single. After consciously uncoupling from their own long-term relationship, they share what they learned about choosing partnership, creating a meaningful life independently, and redefining what a successful relationship can look like. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why we’re so conditioned to believe we need a relationshipHow to tell the difference between wanting a partner and needing oneWhy a fulfilling life doesn’t have to revolve around romantic partnershipWhat makes a relationship genuinely enhance your lifeHow to choose relationships from desire and intention rather than fear or expectation To learn more about Simone Milasas and Brendon Watt, visit www.relationshipsdonedifferent.com Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW Our Sponsors: * Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF. * Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/por * Talkiatry: Complete the short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes at talkiatry.com/por Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

  2. Sep 17

    The Truth About Attachment Styles: Why You’re Not Just Anxious or Avoidant w/ Lauren Korshak

    Attachment styles have become one of the most popular ways to understand relationships—but they’re often reduced to a few labels on social media. Julie & Yue are joined by licensed marriage and family therapist Lauren Korshak to take a closer look at what attachment theory actually tells us about love, closeness, and security. Rather than treating attachment as a fixed identity, we explore how our patterns develop, why insecurity can show up even in secure relationships, and how awareness can help us create more compassionate and connected partnerships. In this episode, you’ll learn: What attachment theory actually tells us about relationshipsHow anxious and avoidant patterns developWhy even securely attached people can feel insecureHow attachment patterns can change over timeHow to use attachment as a tool rather than a label To learn more about Lauren Korshak, visit https://www.lovewellsf.com/ Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW Our Sponsors: * Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF. * Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/por * Talkiatry: Complete the short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes at talkiatry.com/por Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

  3. Sep 10

    Money & Relationships: What Financial Compatibility Really Means for Couples w/ Joe Gavazza

    Money can create some of the biggest tensions in a relationship—but the conflict usually isn’t just about money. It’s about what money represents: security, freedom, control, priorities, and the future you want to build together. Julie & Yue are joined by Joe Gavazza of Gavazza Wealth Management to explore what financial compatibility really looks like and how couples can talk about spending, saving, debt, and long-term goals before they become sources of conflict. In this episode, you’ll learn: What financial compatibility actually means beyond incomeHow your money mindset can shape your relationshipHow to talk about spending, saving, and debtWhy financial transparency can strengthen trustHow couples can create greater alignment around their future To learn more about Joe Gavazza, visit www.gavazza.com. Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW Our Sponsors: * Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF. * Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/por * Talkiatry: Complete the short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes at talkiatry.com/por Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

  4. Sep 3

    Relationship Self-Sabotage: Why We Push Away the Love We Actually Want w/ Dr. Raquel Peel

    Sometimes the things we do to protect ourselves from getting hurt are the very things that create distance in our relationships. Julie & Yue are joined by psychologist and relationship researcher Dr. Raquel Peel to explore why we sometimes sabotage healthy relationships, from pulling away when things get serious to criticizing, becoming defensive, or shutting down when we feel vulnerable. Together, they unpack the Four Horsemen and how greater self-awareness can help us respond differently before protective patterns become relationship-ending habits. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why we sometimes sabotage relationships that are actually healthyHow fear and self-protection can create relationship problemsWhat the Four Horsemen reveal about relationship conflictHow to recognize your own self-sabotaging patternsWays to respond with more vulnerability and intention To learn more about Dr. Raquel Peel, visit https://www.raquelpeel.com Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW Our Sponsors: * Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF. * Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/por * Talkiatry: Complete the short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes at talkiatry.com/por Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

  5. Aug 27

    Marriage 101: The Relationship Skills Nobody Ever Taught You w/ Dr. Alexandra Solomon

    Most people enter relationships without ever being taught the skills needed to sustain one. Communication, conflict, intimacy, and emotional responsibility are often learned through trial and error instead of intention. Dr. Alexandra Solomon—licensed therapist, professor at Northwestern University, and author of Loving Bravely and Taking Sexy Back—joins Julie & Yue to explore the lessons behind her popular course Marriage 101. Rather than focusing on finding “the one,” her work centers on becoming “the one” through self-awareness, emotional growth, and relational skill-building. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why self-awareness is essential for healthy relationshipsHow family history shapes the way we loveWhy conflict is something to work through, not avoidThe role emotional and sexual intimacy play in long-term loveWhat differentiation means and why it matters in relationships To learn more about Dr. Alexandra Solomon, follow her @dralexandrasolomon and visit dralexandrasolomon.com Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW Our Sponsors: * Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF. * Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/por * Talkiatry: Complete the short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes at talkiatry.com/por Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

  6. Aug 20

    The New Science of Emergent Love: How to Build Relationships That Grow Instead of Collapse w/ Dr. Sara Nasserzadi

    What if healthy relationships require more than simply falling in love? Many traditional relationship models teach couples to merge into one shared identity, but that approach can sometimes weaken connection instead of strengthening it. Dr. Sara Nasserzadeh, social psychologist and author of Love by Design, joins Julie & Yue to introduce the Emergent Love Model—a more intentional framework for lasting partnership. She explains why thriving relationships allow both people to continue evolving individually while building a meaningful life together. In this episode, you’ll learn: The difference between emergent and submergent relationshipsWhy “becoming one” can sometimes weaken connectionThe six ingredients that support lasting loveHow intentional partnership differs from passive expectationWays to approach relationships with more clarity and design To learn more about Dr. Sara Nasserzadeh, follow her @dr.saranasserzadeh and visit https://www.sara-nasserzadeh.com/ Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW Our Sponsors: * Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF. * Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/por * Talkiatry: Complete the short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes at talkiatry.com/por Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

  7. Aug 13

    Sex Talks: The Five Conversations Every Couple Needs To Transform Their Love Life w/ Vanessa and Xander Marin

    Sex is one of the most important parts of a relationship—and one of the hardest topics for couples to talk about openly. Vanessa Marin, licensed psychotherapist and author of Sex Talks, joins Julie & Yue alongside her husband and collaborator Xander Marin to unpack why conversations around intimacy often feel so uncomfortable, and how avoidance can quietly create distance in relationships. Together, they explore how communication, emotional safety, and vulnerability shape intimacy far beyond the physical side of sex. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why so many couples struggle to talk about sex openlyHow avoidance impacts intimacy and emotional connectionWays to communicate needs without shame or pressureWhy emotional safety is essential for a healthy sex lifeHow better conversations can strengthen intimacy overall To learn more about Vanessa and Xander Marin, follow them @vanessaandxander and visit vmtherapy.com. Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW Our Sponsors: * Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF. * Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/por * Talkiatry: Complete the short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes at talkiatry.com/por Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

  8. Aug 6

    How to Break Toxic Relationship Cycles for Good w/ Pharaoh Kyle

    After enough painful relationships, many people start asking the same question: why do I keep ending up here? Pharaoh Kyle, spiritual coach and entrepreneur, joins Julie & Yue to explore how toxic relationship patterns form, why people ignore red flags, and what it takes to break unhealthy cycles. He shares how emotional wounds and lost self-trust can keep people stuck in dynamics that no longer serve them—and how healing those patterns can lead to healthier, more aligned relationships moving forward. In this episode, you’ll learn: The common signs of toxic relationship patternsWhy people ignore red flags and stay stuckHow to rebuild trust in yourself after unhealthy relationshipsWhat keeps old relational cycles repeatingTools for healing and choosing healthier connections moving forward To learn more about Pharaoh Kyle, follow him @pharaohkyle and visit pharaohkyle.com Want to feel more connected to your partner? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/PORSHOW Our Sponsors: * Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF. * Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/por * Talkiatry: Complete the short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes at talkiatry.com/por Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

See All (48)

Trailer

4.4
out of 5
108 Ratings

About

Every couple has a story: the sparks, the late-night talks, the fights about nothing, and the moments that change everything. So why do some relationships thrive while others fall apart? The answer isn’t luck; it’s psychology. Join Julie Krafchick and Yue Xu, hosts of the hit podcast Dateable and authors of the book 'How to Be Dateable,' as they navigate this next phase of long-term committed relationships. Together with leading experts in the field, they'll explore what science really tells us about love, conflict, and connection — and translate it into tools you can actually use. 

Information

  • Creator
    Julie Krafchick & Yue Xu
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    48
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2024 Drank Productions LLC
  • Show Website
    The Psychology of Relationships

You Might Also Like