After I Lost You

Matt Smyth
  • 5.0 (2)
  • Society & Culture
  • Updated Biweekly

After I Lost You is a podcast about life after loss. After losing my wife Carli, I share my journey through grief, faith, and learning how to keep moving forward. This is a space for real, honest conversations to help you feel less alone and remind you that your circumstances don’t define who you are or who you can become.

Episodes

  1. Sep 25

    Episode 12 - Learning to Forgive Yourself | Chelsea Wilkes

    In this episode of After I Lost You, I’m joined by Chelsea Wilkes to talk about losing her younger sister, Becca, and the journey of learning to forgive herself after the accident that took her life. Chelsea shares who Becca was, the guilt she carried after losing her, and how grief affected her life in the years that followed. But Chelsea’s story is also one of hope. We talk about learning to forgive yourself, giving the weight you can’t carry to God, and choosing to keep living even after experiencing something that changes you forever. Today, Chelsea has built a beautiful life as a wife and mother while continuing to carry Becca with her. Her story is a reminder that we can hold grief for the life we lost while still finding joy, purpose, faith, and gratitude in the life we have now.

  2. Sep 16

    Episode 11- Turning Pain Into Purpose | Mason Sawyer

    In Episode 11 of After I Lost You, I’m joined by Mason Sawyer for a conversation about unimaginable loss, grief, and choosing to keep living when your entire world changes. In 2021, Mason lost five members of his family in a tragic car accident—his wife, Kortni; his two children, Riggins and Franki; his brother, Race; and his nephew, Rider. His son, Blue, survived. Mason shares who each of them were, the life his family had before the accident, and what it was like facing a life he never imagined he would have to live. We talk about the darkest parts of grief, being a father to Blue while grieving himself, finding purpose after loss, and Mason’s 10/90 philosophy—the idea that we can’t control everything that happens to us, but we can choose how we respond to what happens next. This is a conversation about carrying unimaginable loss, while choosing to keep going, and learning that even when everything changes, there can still be hope in the life ahead.

  3. Sep 9

    Episode 10 - The Love That Doesn’t End: Losing a Child | Topanga & Logan Hawkins

    In Episode 10 of After I Lost You, I’m joined by Topanga and Logan Hawkins as they share the story of their daughter, Cali, who they unexpectedly lost at just 3 years old. Topanga and Logan share who Cali was, the joy and love she brought into their family, some of their favorite memories with her, and the day that changed their lives forever. We talk about what it’s like to grieve the loss of a child, how they’ve learned to support each other while grieving differently, how loss has affected their marriage and family, and how they continue to keep Cali a part of their lives. We also talk about faith, their relationship with God, finding moments of joy again, and what it means to continue living while carrying an unimaginable loss. This is a conversation about a beautiful little girl, two parents who love and miss her deeply, and a love that didn’t end when Cali left this life.

  4. Sep 2

    Episode 9 - How Do You Keep Living When the Person You Planned Your Life With Is Gone? | Annie Wright

    In Episode 9 of After I Lost You, I'm joined by Annie Wright for a conversation neither of us ever imagined we'd be able to relate to—losing our spouses in our twenties. Annie shares the story of her husband, Zach, who he was, the life they were building together, and what it was like to suddenly face a future without the person she planned to spend it with. We talk about the reality of young widowhood, grieving the future you thought you would have, loneliness, finding joy again, sharing grief publicly, faith, and what it really means to keep living without leaving the person you love behind. Our stories are different, but so much of what we've experienced through grief is similar. This is an honest conversation between two people learning how to carry the love, the loss, and the people we miss with us as we continue forward. How do you keep living when the person you planned your life with is gone? We're both still figuring that out.

  5. Aug 19

    Episode 8- The Loss of a Father with Sydney May

    In Episode 8 of After I Lost You, I'm joined by Sydney May to talk about the loss of her father. Sydney shares who her dad was, some of her favorite memories with him, and what it was like navigating the loss of a parent at a young age. We talk about the reality of grief, how loss changes you, the ways we continue to feel connected to the people we've lost, and what has helped her continue moving forward. This is an honest conversation about losing a parent, carrying their memory with you, and learning to find hope and purpose while still making room for grief.

  6. Aug 12

    Episode 7 - The Loss of a Brother with Raymond Brazier

    In my first guest episode of After I Lost You, I'm joined by one of my good friends, Raymond Brazier. Raymond shares the story of his brother, what he remembers most about him, and what it has been like navigating life and grief after losing him to suicide. We talk about living with unanswered questions, guilt, faith, healing, and how losing someone we love can change the way we see life. Raymond also shares what has helped him continue moving forward while keeping his brother's memory and influence with him. This is an honest conversation about loss, love, faith, and learning to carry the questions we may never have answers to.

  7. Aug 11

    Episode 6- You Don’t Have to Walk Through This Alone

    If I could sit down with the version of myself who had just lost Carli one year ago, what would I tell him? In this episode, I share some of the things I wish I understood during those first days of grief—from allowing yourself to feel everything and leaning on the people around you, to simply taking life one day at a time. I also share how movement, family, friends, purpose, and most importantly my faith in Jesus Christ have helped carry me through the hardest year of my life. If you're grieving, hurting, or simply walking through a difficult season, I hope this episode reminds you of one thing: You don't have to have everything figured out. You don't have to walk through this alone. And your story isn't over.

  8. Jul 31

    Episode 5- Grief Thoughts On Moving Forward

    What does it really mean to move forward after losing someone you love? In this episode, I share what I've learned about moving forward without leaving Carli behind. I talk about the difference between moving on and moving forward, finding purpose through pain, and learning to carry both grief and gratitude. If you're navigating loss or walking through a difficult season, I hope this episode reminds you that healing doesn't mean forgetting—and you don't have to walk this road alone.

  9. Jun 1

    Episode 4- What Grief Has Taught Me

    In this episode, I share some of the biggest lessons grief has taught me since losing my wife, Carli. From learning how to carry both grief and gratitude, to finding strength through faith, family, and purpose, I reflect on the things that have helped me navigate the hardest season of my life. This episode is about loss, love, healing, and the hope that can still be found even in the middle of heartbreak. If you're going through something difficult, I hope this reminds you that you're not alone and that there is still purpose in your story.

  10. May 3

    Episode 3 - Life After Losing Carli

    In this episode, I share what the last year of my life has really looked like after losing my wife, Carli. I talk about the reality of grief, what’s helped me get through day to day, and how my faith in Jesus Christ has given me strength and hope. If you’re going through something hard, I hope this helps you feel a little less alone.

  11. Apr 26

    Episode 2- Carli and Matt's Story

    In this episode, I share mine and Carli’s story—from how we first met, to the relationship we built, and the life we created together. Carli wasn’t just my wife, she was my best friend and my person, and I wanted to take some time to share a glimpse into who she was and what made her so special.

  12. Apr 19

    Episode 1- Welcome to the Podcast

    In this first episode, I share why I started After I Lost You and what this podcast is all about. This is a space for real conversations around grief, faith, and finding a way forward. If you’re going through something hard, you’re not alone.

  • 12 Episodes

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
2 Ratings

About

After I Lost You is a podcast about life after loss. After losing my wife Carli, I share my journey through grief, faith, and learning how to keep moving forward. This is a space for real, honest conversations to help you feel less alone and remind you that your circumstances don’t define who you are or who you can become.

Information

  • Creator
    Matt Smyth
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    12
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Matt Smyth
  • Show Website
    After I Lost You

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