Language of Love with Dr. Laura Berman

The Language of Love
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Language of Love is a weekly podcast where Dr. Berman shares her compassionate, humorous, and no-nonsense advice: answering listener questions and interviewing thought leaders and experts on relevant topics. Dr. Berman is ready to help you create the fulfilling and passionate love life you deserve, regardless of your relationship status, gender, or sexual orientation. Are you ready to get started? 

  1. 5D AGO

    Sex, Energy, and the Science of Staying in Love

    When was the last time you felt completely alive with your partner, not because of what you did, but because of how connected you felt? No new toys, no faraway trips, no clever tricks. Just presence. Just energy. Just the spark that comes from truly seeing and being seen. In this Language of Love Session, I sit down with Rachel, a listener and student of Sex Magic, who joined one of my live events in New Jersey and left with a notebook full of questions and a heart full of curiosity. Together, we explore what really fuels passion after the honeymoon fades. It’s not dopamine or novelty, but the deeper vibrational energy that connects two people soul to soul. We explore:  Why true intimacy starts with awareness, not more techniques How to tell the difference between dopamine-fueled excitement and deep energetic connection How curiosity can dissolve judgment and open your heart wider What to do when one partner feels the energy instantly and the other doesn’t (yet) How to hold your vibration without taking on someone else’s emotions The concept of the Quantum Love Map and its relevance to vibrational matching Why we attract emotionally heavy people and how to stop being their anchor How raising your frequency naturally transforms your relationships Simple Sex Magic practices to clarify desire and realign with what you truly want The importance of being in a high energetic state during sex to enhance the manifestation process. This conversation is for anyone who’s ever looked at their partner and wondered, Can we ever feel that spark again? The answer is yes, but it doesn’t come from doing more. It comes from being more: more present, more attuned, more alive. Passion never really dies; it just waits for you to come back home to your body, your energy, and your heart. And if this episode lit something up in you, keep the flame going. Grab your copy of Sex Magic and explore the free meditations and tools at healwithlaura.com. I’d love to hear your story or your question for our next book club, just send me an email at languageoflovepod@gmail.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    57 min

  2. NOV 10

    How to Have Sex Again After a Long Dry Spell

    Let’s be honest, every long-term relationship has seasons where sex gets pushed aside. Between changing bodies, kids, work stress, money stress, and just plain exhaustion, months can slip into years without intimacy. So what do you do when you want sex again, but it feels awkward, foreign, or even impossible to bring up? In this Language of Love Bite, I walk you through how to gently break the silence, rebuild emotional closeness, and take small but powerful steps back into an erotic connection with your partner. You will see that reigniting passion is not about pressure or performance, it is about safety, communication, and rediscovering each other in a playful, sensual way. We discuss: Why passion fades in long-term relationships (and how resentment sneaks in) The role of emotional safety and non-sexual touch in reawakening desire How to use “sensate focus” to rebuild intimacy step by step The surprising power of non-demand kissing to spark erotic energy A sensual awakening ritual you can try tonight to gently reignite connection When and how to seek support from a certified sex therapist (AASECT.org) Desire is never truly gone, it is just waiting for permission to return. If you want to go deeper into creating sacred, satisfying intimacy, check out my book Sex Magic for step-by-step practices to awaken erotic pleasure and deepen connection. And do not forget to subscribe to the Language of Love podcast for more bite-sized tools to transform your love life. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    12 min

  3. NOV 5

    Love, Loss, and the Goal of a Lifetime with Nikki Mark

    What do you do when everything you’ve built, everything you’ve believed in, suddenly means nothing, and all that’s left is heartbreak, silence, and the question, “How do I go on?”  In this profoundly moving episode of The Language of Love Session, I sit down with author, mother, and speaker Nikki Mark, whose journey through unimaginable loss became a blueprint for healing, transformation, and connection across worlds. In 2018, Nikki had lost her 12-year-old son, Tommy. Doctors had no answers, only silence. But what followed wasn’t the end of their story. In the depths of grief, Nikki began to experience undeniable signs, powerful dreams, and moments of connection that defied logic but spoke directly to the heart. With no spiritual background to lean on, Nikki did what she knew best: she treated herself like a startup. One small step each day toward two goals: survive for her younger son, and honor her older one. From that resolve grew Tommy’s Field, a community soccer space dedicated to play, healing, and love, and a new mission to transform grief into purpose. In this Conversation, we explore: How to find meaning when life makes no sense. The powerful “conversation” that foretold her son’s passing and the signs that followed. What it means to “treat yourself like a startup” and rebuild a life from the ashes. The role of dreams, signs, and synchronicities in grief healing. The connection between generational trauma and soul contracts, and how healing yourself can heal those who came before you. What it really means to “keep playing” when your heart is broken. The choice that changes everything: choosing life again. If you’ve ever wondered whether love really continues beyond this world, or how to live again after loss, Nikki’s story is living proof that we can find grace even in grief and purpose where we once saw only pain. To learn more about Nikki’s work, visit nikkimark.com and read her book Tommy’s Field: Love, Loss, and the Goal of a Lifetime. And if you’re ready to take your next brave step toward healing, visit lauraberman.com to explore The Good Grief Course,  a heart-centered journey that helps you transform pain into peace and reconnect with the love that never ends. If this conversation touched your heart, I’d love to hear your story. Email me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com. Your healing, your heart, and your voice matter. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    58 min

  4. OCT 29

    Breaking the Cycle: How to Stop Having the Same Fight Over and Over Again

    Did you know that if you keep leaving relationships because you’re tired of having the same arguments, you’ll probably end up having those same fights in the next one too? It doesn’t always mean you’re not compatible. Most of the time, it simply means there’s something still needs healing. In this episode of The Language of Love Sessions, I answer a question from a listener named Carrie. She wrote in because she and her partner keep fighting in circles. Same argument, same frustration, and she’s starting to lose hope that things will ever change. I get it. It’s exhausting. But what I’ve learned after decades of working with couples is that repeating arguments aren’t just about who’s right or wrong. They’re often a mirror showing us the patterns and pain we haven’t yet healed. Our relationships have this beautiful way of bringing up the stuff that’s ready to be worked on if we’re willing to look at it. In this session, I talk about: Why you keep finding yourself in the same kind of fights How to take responsibility for your part in the pattern The difference between incompatibility and unhealed wounds How to turn conflict into a chance for connection instead of disconnection Why doing your own healing work changes every relationship you have If you’ve ever thought, “Why does this always happen to me?”, this episode is for you. Because real change doesn’t start by finding someone new. It starts by getting curious about yourself. If you’d like me to answer your question on the show, send me an email at languageoflovepod@gmail.com or leave me a voice note at speakpipe.com/languageoflove. Remember, love isn’t about avoiding conflict. It’s about learning from it, healing through it, and growing together. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    6 min

  5. OCT 27

    Is This the Best S*x Position Ever for Women?

    Some people swear by the 69 position, others love the comfort of missionary, some can’t get enough of doggy style, and plenty enjoy the view with reverse cowgirl. But here’s the real question… But there is one position that actually makes you feel the most connected, the most turned on, and the most satisfied.  In this Language of Love Bite, I break down what science, anatomy, and thousands of real women have shared about the most reliable position for her pleasure. Imagine it’s simpler than you think, and with just a pillow and some mindful adjustments, it can go from average to unforgettable. We discuss: Why only 20–25% of women orgasm from penetration alone The role clitoral stimulation plays in reliable pleasure How a simple pelvic angle shift transforms missionary into the most effective position Why emotional safety and nervous system calm are essential for orgasm The benefits of chest-to-chest contact, oxytocin release, and eye contact How to use your hands (or hers) for clitoral stimulation during penetration The secret sauce for creating connected, simultaneous orgasms If you want to take this deeper, check out my book Sex Magic for a full guide to creating erotic intimacy that feels sacred and deeply satisfying. And don’t forget to subscribe to the Language of Love podcast so you never miss a bite-sized tip to level up your love life. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    7 min
  6. Letting Go, Letting Love, and Learning to Stay Open with Jennifer Pastiloff

    OCT 22

    Letting Go, Letting Love, and Learning to Stay Open with Jennifer Pastiloff

    We all carry invisible chains: beliefs like "I’m not enough," "I’m not ready," or "What if I fail?" The real cage isn’t the world around us; it’s the story we’ve been told about who we’re allowed to be. Because freedom doesn’t come from trying harder, proving more, or fitting into someone else’s mold, it comes from letting go. In this Language of Love Conversation, I sit down with Jennifer Pastiloff, author and speaker, whose new book Proof of Life explores the powerful act of reclaiming permission to exist fully in your own body, voice, and life. After years of self-doubt, shame, and self-abandonment, Jennifer shares how healing began with learning to speak her truth out loud. We dive into Jennifer's journey of self-discovery, which was shaped by moments of struggle, loss, and personal awakening. In this Conversation, we explore:  How to recognize your “inner asshole” and stop believing its lies Why speaking your truth out loud is where healing begins What “heart-sight” means and how to listen to it The trap of “when I get there, then I’ll be happy” How making bad art can actually set you free Why finding your “I got you” people changes everything The lesson grief teaches us about living now, not later If you've ever struggled with shame or felt disconnected from yourself, this conversation is a beacon back home. Remember to check out Jennifer’s book, Proof of Life: Let Go, Let Love, and Stop Looking for Permission to Live Your Life, now available on Amazon. For her intimate, life-changing retreats, visit jenniferpastiloff.com/ and email her directly  @jenniferpastiloff.com to apply, she loves hearing from people who are ready to show up fully and authentically. You can also find her on Instagram and Substack.  And if this conversation moved you, I’d love to hear your story. Email me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    53 min

  7. OCT 15

    Why You Keep Attracting Emotionally Unavailable Partners

    Have you ever wondered why you keep ending up in the same kind of painful relationship almost like you’re tuned to a certain frequency that keeps pulling you toward emotionally unavailable partners? In this episode of Language of Love Session, I answer a heartfelt question from Sarah, a listener who wrote in asking: “Why do I keep attracting emotionally unavailable people, and how can I heal whatever inside me is drawing me to these relationships?”  We explore how the energy you carry, your vibration, and your earliest experiences all play a role in who you’re drawn to and why. I also share how healing practices like somatic experiencing and Internal Family Systems therapy can help shift your frequency so you attract partners who are truly capable of love and connection. We explore: Why emotionally unavailable partners feel so familiar (and why it’s not just “bad luck”) How childhood patterns set the vibration for the partners we’re drawn to later in life Ways somatic therapy helps release unconscious patterns stored in the body How Internal Family Systems therapy rewires your inner world for healthier love Why “butterflies” aren’t always passion, they may be your nervous system picking up on an old, unhealthy frequency This is all about learning how to change your vibration so you stop repeating painful cycles and open yourself up to safe, supportive love. For resources on somatic experiencing,  visit the Hakomi Institute or traumatherapy.org  for more on this powerful mindfulness-centered approach to healing. Have a question you’d like me to answer on the show? Email me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com, leave a voice message or question at SpeakPipe.com/LanguageofLove  or connect with me on social media @DrLauraBerman. For more support, visit my website for expert resources and don’t forget to check out my newest book, Sex Magic. And if you’re navigating betrayal or struggling to rebuild trust, share your story with me at languageoflovepod@gmail.com for a chance to be featured in a future episode. Your journey could be exactly what someone else needs to hear. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    10 min

  8. OCT 13

    Can’t Stay Present During Sex? Here’s Why

    How often do you find yourself zoning out during sex? One moment you’re fully present, the next, you’re mentally sorting laundry, overanalyzing your stomach, or wondering if your partner is actually enjoying it. It happens. A lot. In this Language of Love Bite, I break down why this happens, what’s going on in your nervous system and why even a hint of unease can make it so hard to stay turned on. I also share a quick, powerful exercise from my book Sex Magic to help you reconnect with your body. It takes less than three minutes, and you can do it solo or with a partner. In this Bite, you will discover:  Why your brain checks out during sex How anxiety hijacks arousal and how to reclaim it A quick way to come back into your body How to shift from pressure to sensation A simple 3-minute exercise (from Sex Magic) to snap back into your body, quiet your mind, and shift from pressure to pleasure Ready to unlock deeper pleasure and power? Grab your copy of Sex Magic and dive into transformative insights that awaken your sensual energy. While you're there, don’t miss out on the free Quantum Sex Course  designed to elevate your intimacy levels. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    6 min
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162 Ratings

About

Language of Love is a weekly podcast where Dr. Berman shares her compassionate, humorous, and no-nonsense advice: answering listener questions and interviewing thought leaders and experts on relevant topics. Dr. Berman is ready to help you create the fulfilling and passionate love life you deserve, regardless of your relationship status, gender, or sexual orientation. Are you ready to get started? 

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