Love Inside Out with Adele Testa

Adele The Coach
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What if the way we've been thinking about love is keeping us from actually having it? Whether you're happily partnered, struggling to connect, or somewhere in the messy middle—pull up a chair. Let's figure this out together. Love Inside Out is for anyone who's ever felt like they're performing in their relationship instead of living in it. For people who wonder if compromise has turned into playing small. For those asking: Why was this easier in my twenties? I'm Adele—coach, and curious human. Thank you for joining me in this journey!

  1. hace 1 día

    Heart Note #4: Why everyone's on the dating apps in summer

    It starts with a quiet Sunday evening. The sun is still up, everyone else seems to be out living their best summer, and suddenly you are downloading the dating app you swore you deleted for good. In this Summer Heart Note, we look at what that ache may really be: the wish to feel wanted, the need for someone to share a sunset with, the discomfort of arriving alone to another barbecue, or simply the feeling that summer is happening somewhere else. This is not an episode telling you to stay off the apps. It is a gentler invitation to pause before you swipe, understand what you are actually looking for, and date without handing your worth to a stranger’s thumb. Bring a cold drink and an honest answer. This one may help you use the apps with a little more clarity — and a lot more self-respect. Get in touch on IG: adele_thecoach If you are curious, the replay's episode for Wednesday is episode 9: how to recognise your person

    17 min

  2. hace 5 días

    Replay #3: why fight lingers?

    Most of us think the fight is the damage, but the real damage usually happens after, in the silence nobody teaches us how to handle. This week's Sunday Heart Note was about the careful quiet that shows up on holiday. So I'm bringing back one of my favourite episodes on a different silence entirely: the one that lands right after a row. 🤎 In this extract of episode 11, we get into why you genuinely can't have a calm conversation three minutes later, the three things we all do instead i.e. rush it, go cold, or pretend nothing happened; and the difference between an apology and an actual repair. I also share one of the most vulnerable stories I've told on here: the months I picked fights about the bins when the real thing I couldn't say had nothing to do with the bins at all. 🤎 If you've been arguing in circles and can't figure out why, this one's for you. 🤎 If you are curious to listen to the entire episode, here is the link If you want to share your thoughts, get in touch at @adele_thecoach on instagram

    13 min

  3. 28 jun

    Heart Note #3: when the couple holiday isn't working

    A holiday is basically a relationship stress test in a sunhat. Take away the work, the routine, the separate friends, the rooms you can escape to; and it's just the two of us, sharing a bathroom, a bed, and every single decision about where to go and what to eat. That's exactly where the friction I'd been quietly avoiding for months had nowhere left to hide. In this Heart Note: I get into why couples end up arguing about a taxi that was never really about the taxi. I'll walk you through the four things that usually sit underneath a holiday row, why travel doesn't create the tension so much as expose it, and the one honest sentence that can soften a heavy silence at dinner without tipping into a fight. I also share a five-minute check-in you can use mid-trip, or at your own kitchen table on a Tuesday night.Here's what I want you to take away: whatever your trip reveals is information, not a verdict. A bumpy holiday doesn't mean you're wrong together. Usually it means there's something real here, real enough to be worth working on. Stay curious. Be brave. 🤎 On Wednesday, the replay: Episode 11, how to recover, and actually grow, after an argument. Today was about the silence in the middle of a trip. Wednesday is about what happens when that silence finally breaks.

    12 min

  4. 23 jun

    Replay #2: Are you where you want to be in love?

    Sunday's Heart Note left us with an idea: wedding-grief isn't a wound, it's a compass, pointing at something you still want. Today's replay picks up that needle and puts it on the table. This is the Episode 3 extract: are you where you want to be in love? We will try to explore the complex question: if nothing changed for a whole year, if twelve months from now your love life looked exactly like it does today, would you feel at peace? Or quietly unhappy? That gap, between where you are and where you thought you'd be, is what we sit with here. The moment their mood quietly becomes the owner of yours. The difference between a life season and a relationship pattern. And a few honest questions to take with you, including some just for you if you're single right now. Not to fix anything today. Just to notice it. 🤎 Follow so the rest of the summer replays land in your feed.

    9 min

  5. 20 jun

    Heart Note #2: The wedding invite that hit differently

    You can be genuinely happy for the groom and bride, and still go home feeling sad. Those two things co-exist at the same time when you are in a challenging spot in your love life. In this Summer Heart Note, we explore the quiet feeling that sometimes follows weddings, engagement announcements, and other people's love stories. We try to understand what that mixed-emotion might be trying to tell you. Be brave, stay curious and enjoy this episode of the LOVE INSIDE OUT's summer edition. Get in touch at adele_thecoach on instagram, I am curious to hear your thoughts!

    8 min

  6. 17 jun

    Replay # 1: Juggling LOVE and LIFE

    What if the argument is not really about the dishes, the bins or the unanswered text? Sometimes the relationship is not the problem. Life is. Work pressure, exhaustion, children, ageing parents, money, commuting and the mental load can quietly change how we speak, listen and react to each other. A small comment lands badly. One person withdraws. The other pushes harder. Suddenly, you are arguing about something neither of you truly cares about. In this first Summer Replay, I share an extract from Episode 5 about what happens when everyday stress enters a relationship—and starts disguising itself as a relationship problem. You will explore why focusing only on the latest argument can keep you stuck, how to recognise your own stress signature, and why the thing that helps you reconnect may sometimes happen away from your partner. The episode also introduces simple ways to interrupt tension before it becomes a full argument, including decompression time, tips for difficult conversations and language that helps you name the pattern rather than fight over the surface issue. Because when life gets heavy, connection rarely needs to be perfect or impressive. Sometimes it simply needs to say: we are still choosing each other. Summer Replay No. 1 is an extract from Episode 5: How Life, Work and Juggling Impact Your Love Life—and What to Do About It.

    15 min

  7. 13 jun

    Heart Note #1: the version of You that only appears on holiday

    Have you ever noticed that a different version of you seems to appear a few days into a holiday? Your body softens. You laugh more easily. You become more curious, more spontaneous and more open to the person beside you. Then you come home—and that version of you seems to disappear almost immediately. In this first Summer Heart Note, we explore what might really be changing when we step away from routine, pressure and the roles we carry every day. Is it the place, the rest, the warm light—or is something deeper happening? This short episode looks at the hidden difference between who we are on holiday and who we become in ordinary life. It also offers one question to carry with you through the week—especially if you have ever returned home feeling that you left an important part of yourself behind. Stay curious and be brave.

    7 min

  8. 7 jun

    25. Sorry is a word. Change is a practice

    Six sorries in two minutes — and the argument only got worse. If you've ever said "sorry" just to make the discomfort stop… if you've ever been handed an apology that left you feeling more unseen, not less… if you're quietly waiting for an "I'm sorry" that never seems to arrive — this one is for you. Most of us were never taught how to apologise. Very few of us ever received a real apology from a parent while we were still children. So we grew up improvising — reaching for the word "sorry" like a button that ends the argument, instead of a bridge that repairs it. In this episode of Love Inside Out, Adele the Coach reframes apology from a confession of being bad into what it actually is: an adult life skill. Being aware of your mistake, and steady enough to repair it — without spinning, negotiating, or softening it to protect yourself. The people who are genuinely good at love are the ones who can do this cleanly. And it's learnable. This is the last full-length episode before the summer break — and it's the one everything this season has been quietly building towards. Inside, we cover: 00:00 Understanding apologies: the journey begins00:22 The anatomy of a real apology01:44 Dismantling fake apologies05:21 Building a genuine apology10:05 The 5 components of a real apology14:57 Navigating reactions and moving forward16:43 The power of apology17:17 Waiting for an apology19:39 Understanding fake apologies21:49 The Importance of genuine change26:11 Personal growth through acceptance28:04 The gap between words and actions32:04 Reflections and challenges for growth This week's Heart Work — the last of the season — is two reflections and one challenge: name the apology you owe and the one you're still waiting for, spot your favourite fake apology, and then give one real apology this week using the five components. Don't rush it. Don't soften it. See what happens. Whether you're partnered, dating, or single and noticing the same pattern show up wherever you go — this is a tool for life. A note on what's next: Love Inside Out shifts into Summer Heart Notes — short ~10-minute reflections every Sunday, plus the juiciest extract from a favourite episode each Wednesday. Full-length episodes return in September, with a new monthly listener Q&A. Stay in touch If this episode lands for you, I'd love to hear about it. 🤎 Instagram — @adele_thecoach

    34 min
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What if the way we've been thinking about love is keeping us from actually having it? Whether you're happily partnered, struggling to connect, or somewhere in the messy middle—pull up a chair. Let's figure this out together. Love Inside Out is for anyone who's ever felt like they're performing in their relationship instead of living in it. For people who wonder if compromise has turned into playing small. For those asking: Why was this easier in my twenties? I'm Adele—coach, and curious human. Thank you for joining me in this journey!

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