Pleasure in the Pause: Midlife Conversations About Menopause, Sex & Pleasure

Gabriella Espinosa

Menopause doesn't mean the end of pleasure — it’s a new beginning! Pleasure in the Pause is the podcast redefining midlife for women ready to reconnect with their bodies, pleasure, and power — at every stage of the menopause journey and beyond. Hosted by Gabriella Espinosa, certified menopause coach and sexual health advocate, each episode features informative and thought-provoking conversations with doctors, thought leaders, and wellness experts on hormones, sexual health, desire, and healthy aging. Expect actionable strategies and empowering insights to help you feel more confident, energized, and connected to your body — no matter your age. Together, we’ll reframe the conversation around pleasure, sex, and midlife so you can be the best advocate for your body — in and out of the bedroom. Because PLEASURE HAS NO EXPIRATION DATE! Say YES! to Pleasure at www.pleasureinthepause.com

  1. 90 | The Business of Pleasure: Tools for Self-Love in Midlife with Oboo founder Amy St. Germain

    2D AGO

    90 | The Business of Pleasure: Tools for Self-Love in Midlife with Oboo founder Amy St. Germain

    What if the most important love story you nurture this Valentine's Week isn't with a partner, but with yourself? In this conversation on Pleasure in the Pause, host Gabriella Espinosa sits down with Amy St. Germain, founder of Oboo, a pleasure-forward wellness brand creating tools designed specifically for midlife bodies.  This episode is a shame-free exploration of self-pleasure as self-care, the health benefits of vibrators for midlife women, and why desire doesn't disappear as our bodies change. Whether you're navigating dryness, decreased sensitivity, or simply want to reclaim pleasure on your own terms, this conversation reminds you that your body is amazing at every age. Amy St. Germain is the founder of Oboo, a pleasure-forward wellness brand creating tools and products designed for midlife bodies. What started as her own wake-up call turned into a mission to make intimacy, desire, and self-pleasure feel accessible, practical, and shame-free. Through Oboo's thoughtfully designed products and open, honest conversations, Amy helps women feel more at home in their bodies, laugh a little more about the changes of midlife, and stay open to trying something new. Her approach blends curiosity, humor, and real-life usefulness. Her favorite reminder: desire doesn't disappear in midlife. It just needs better lighting, better language, and better tools. Highlights from our discussion include: 50% of women over 50 stop having sex or being intimate altogether, but we have at least 30 more years to enjoy pleasure.Vibrators aren't just for pleasure. They improve blood flow, reduce dryness, support pelvic floor health, and can even reduce hot flashes.The "Pleasure Reset" is five minutes of pressure-free self-pleasure with no goal, no performance, just reconnection with your body.Better lighting, better language, and better tools are what desire needs in midlife, not fixing something that's broken.Pregaming (warming yourself up before partner intimacy) takes the pressure off and allows you to arrive ready and connected.Using lubricant makes everything feel better, even if you don't think you need it. Comfort first, then move to the next steps.Connect with Amy St. Germain: Website Instagram Resources Mentioned: Blog - The Pleasure Reset (5-minute pressure-free self-pleasure practice) Kinsey Institute research on self-pleasure and symptom relief Ep 80 Good Vibes Ep 64 Communicating with a Partner about Pleasure CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA: Instagram LinkedIn Celebrate Valentine’s Week with the Oooh Palm Massager giveaway from OBO, created for midlife bodies. Leave a review for Pleasure in the Pause, screenshot it, and DM @gabriellaespinosa on Instagram to enter.  Full episodes on YouTube. The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.

    56 min
  2. 89 | Motherhood, Mental Health And Return To Self With Lizzie Bermudez [Return to Her Series]

    FEB 4

    89 | Motherhood, Mental Health And Return To Self With Lizzie Bermudez [Return to Her Series]

    What happens when your child's mental health crisis becomes your entire world and you quietly lose yourself in the process? In this debut episode of Return to Her, a new monthly series on Pleasure in the Pause, host Gabriella Espinosa sits down with lifestyle host and midlife influencer Lizzie Bermudez for an honest conversation about walking through over three years of her daughter's mental health struggles while putting her own life completely on hold. Lizzie shares what it felt like to be her daughter's primary caretaker in survival mode, how she navigated the isolation and stigma surrounding mental health, and the turning point when she finally realized the best thing she could do for her daughter was take care of herself. This is a powerful story about caregiving, crisis, and the slow, messy, beautiful journey of coming home to yourself again. Lizzie is a lifestyle host, podcaster and midlife influencer. She helps women embrace the "middle ages" by sharing tips, tricks, and interviews about looking and feeling your best when it comes to midlife, menopause and empty nesting. Lizzie B's audience knows she doesn't take herself too seriously, and viewers love following her entertaining behind-the-scenes stories on Instagram and TikTok.   Lizzie also spent 20-plus years as an Emmy award-winning broadcast journalist and host. During that time, she interviewed everyone from celebrities to CEOs to presidents and developed the skills of storytelling and engaging viewers.   If you ask Lizzie her favorite thing about switching from traditional media to digital, she’ll proudly tell you she can say just about whatever the eff she wants and no longer needs a full face of makeup to go on camera. Highlights from our discussion include: When your child struggles with mental health, the isolation is overwhelming. People don't know what to say, so they say nothing.DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy) gave her family tools and a shared language to navigate emotional regulation and crisis.Learning that two things can be true at once expanded her capacity to hold conflicting emotions without judgment.Coming home to herself feels like lightness. Waking up smiling again, cortisol releasing, opening to friendships after years of isolation.Laughter was medicine. Even in the darkest days, finding one thing to laugh about each day became a survival tool.If you're in the thick of caregiving and losing yourself, if you're slowly coming back, or if you're still figuring it out—this conversation reminds you that returning to yourself is always possible. Listen now and discover that even after the most intense seasons, lightness and joy can return. CONNECT WITH LIZZIE BERMUDEZ: TikTok Instagram CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA: Instagram LinkedIn Work with Gabriella!  Celebrate Valentine’s Week with the Oooh Palm Massager giveaway from OBO, created for midlife bodies. Leave a review for Pleasure in the Pause, screenshot it, and DM @gabriellaespinosa on Instagram to enter.  Full episodes on YouTube. The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.

    55 min
  3. 88 | The Intimate Animal: Why We’re Wired For Love, Desire, And Connection In Midlife with Dr. Justin Garcia

    JAN 28

    88 | The Intimate Animal: Why We’re Wired For Love, Desire, And Connection In Midlife with Dr. Justin Garcia

    Have you ever looked at your long-term partner and wondered: Is this still the connection I want? Who are we now? Can we feel close again? If you've reached midlife and found yourself in a relationship that feels more like roommates than lovers, if the spark has faded and you're not sure how to reignite it, or if you're navigating the dating world again after years away, this episode is for you. Gabriella Espinosa sits down with Dr. Justin Garcia. Dr. Garcia brings decades of research to answer the questions many midlife women are asking: Why do long-term relationships drift into disconnection? Can desire return after years together? Is it possible to rebuild intimacy when life, hormones, and identity are all shifting at once? And perhaps most importantly: Are we asking romantic partnerships to do something evolution never designed them for? Dr. Justin R. Garcia is an evolutionary biologist and international authority on the science of sex and relationships. Since 2019, he has served as Executive Director of the world-renowned Kinsey Institute, where he is also a Senior Scientist. He holds an appointment as the Ruth N. Halls Professor in the College of Arts and Sciences at Indiana University and is a Founding Co-Director of Human Sexuality and Health at the IU School of Medicine. An award-winning researcher and educator, Dr. Garcia is the Chief Scientific Advisor to Match, where he provides expertise for the annual Singles in America study. His research focuses on people's romantic and sexual lives throughout the life course, especially on integrative biopsychosocial models of variation in courtship, intimacy, and sexual behavior. He has co-authored over 100 academic articles and book chapters and is co-author of Evolution and Human Sexual Behavior. His latest book, The Intimate Animal: Why We Live for Love, explores the science behind human connection and is available now. Highlights from our discussion include: Intimacy Lives in the Shadow of SexSocial Monogamy vs. Sexual MonogamySexual Habituation Is Normal (And Solvable)What Keeps Passion Alive in Long-Term RelationshipsThe Intimacy Crisis Is RealMidlife Dating Prioritizes Chemistry AND CompatibilityGray Divorce and RenegotiationCuriosity Is the Best Tonic for RelationshipsSexual Satisfaction Increases with AgeTechnology Is a Tool, Not a ReplacementWhether you're in a long-term partnership, newly dating, or choosing singlehood, you'll discover why humans are wired for belonging and how midlife can be the beginning of your real love story. CONNECT WITH Dr. Justin Garcia: Instagram Kinsey Institute CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA: Instagram LinkedIn Work with Gabriella!  Celebrate Valentine’s Week with the Oooh Palm Massager giveaway from OBO, created for midlife bodies. Leave a review for Pleasure in the Pause, screenshot it, and DM @gabriellaespinosa on Instagram to enter.  Full episodes on YouTube. The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.

    59 min
  4. 87 | Unapologetic Aging: How to Build a Loving Relationship with Your Midlife Body with Deb Benfield

    JAN 21

    87 | Unapologetic Aging: How to Build a Loving Relationship with Your Midlife Body with Deb Benfield

    When you look in the mirror, what's the first story you tell yourself about your body? If you're like most midlife women, that internal dialogue is often rooted in criticism, comparison, and the relentless pressure to "fix" an aging body that was never broken in the first place. In this episode of Pleasure in the Pause, host Gabriella Espinosa sits down with registered dietitian and body image coach Deb Benfield to explore how internalized ageism and diet culture keep us disconnected from our bodies—and what it takes to reclaim body trust, pleasure, and freedom in midlife and beyond. Deb Benfield, M.Ed., RDN, LDN, RYT, is a Registered Dietitian, nutrition therapist, and body image coach with 40 years of experience helping people heal their relationship with food, movement, and their bodies. Her work sits at the intersection of anti-ageism, body liberation, and trauma-informed care—offering a radically compassionate alternative to diet and wellness culture, especially for those in midlife and beyond. After turning 60, Deb began questioning the dominant narratives around aging, vitality, and beauty, and quickly realized how many resources still centered weight loss and youthful appearance as ultimate goals. In response, she created what she couldn’t find: a framework for nourishing the body that honors inner wisdom, prioritizes vitality, and embraces the full spectrum of aging. She’s the author of Unapologetic Aging: How to Mend and Nourish Your Relationship with Your Body, and she offers individual and group coaching to help her clients age unapologetically—on their own terms. Highlights from our discussion include: Understanding Your Body StoryYour Body Is Your Life Partner, Not Your Life's ProjectInternalized Ageism Keeps You StuckDiet Culture Fuels Hypervigilance, Not HealthRebuilding Body Trust Through EmbodimentRedefining Intimacy and Pleasure in MidlifeGLP-1 Medications: A Complex DecisionPermission to Stop ApologizingWhat if you stopped treating your body like a problem to solve and started honoring it as the life partner it's always been? This episode is an invitation home—to your body, your pleasure, and your power. If you're ready to step off the diet culture rollercoaster and into a more compassionate, embodied way of living, Deb Benfield's Unapologetic Aging is the companion you need. CONNECT WITH DEB BENFIELD: Website: https://www.debrabenfield.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/agingbodyliberation/ Substack: https://substack.com/@debbenfield1 CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA: Instagram LinkedIn Work with Gabriella!  Celebrate Valentine’s Week with the Oooh Palm Massager giveaway from OBO, created for midlife bodies. Leave a review for Pleasure in the Pause, screenshot it, and DM @gabriellaespinosa on Instagram to enter.  Full episodes on YouTube. The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.

    54 min
  5. 86 | Psychedelics, Menopause & Mental Health: What Midlife Women Need to Know with Ashley Turner

    JAN 14

    86 | Psychedelics, Menopause & Mental Health: What Midlife Women Need to Know with Ashley Turner

    Are you doing all the "right things" for your menopause symptoms—hormone therapy, nutrition, exercise, stress management—but still not feeling like yourself?  In this episode of Pleasure in the Pause, host Gabriela Espinosa welcomes back licensed psychotherapist Ashley Turner for a groundbreaking conversation about psychedelic-assisted therapy and microdosing as complementary support during the menopause transition. Ashley Turner is a licensed marriage and family psychotherapist, yoga/meditation teacher, and founder of Yoga Psyche Soul, specializing in integrating Eastern spiritual practices with Western psychology (depth, shadow, and somatic psychology, women's mental health) for 25 years. After her own intense menopausal mental health struggles (depression, anxiety, confidence loss, cognitive issues), Ashley explored psychedelic-assisted therapy and psilocybin microdosing. She is completing her psychedelic-assisted therapy certification through the Integrated Psychiatry Institute in Boulder, focusing on psilocybin, ketamine, and MDMA. Ashley created the six-month Metamorphosis program for menopause and recently launched The Portal, a 12-week microdosing and menopause group therapy program with Golden Rule. Highlights from our discussion include: Menopause is a developmental phase, not just a medical event. Mental health symptoms during menopause can persist even with optimal lifestyle interventions.Psilocybin microdosing creates neuroplasticity and can act as a natural mood stabilizer.Psychedelic-assisted therapy is different from microdosing on your own. "No pills without skills" applies to all interventions, including psychedelics.This week, get curious: educate yourself by watching Ashley's masterclass on Microdosing and Menopause, read one of the books she mentioned (Mycelio-Pause or The Psilocybin Guidebook for Women), or simply journal about what you're experiencing emotionally and psychologically beyond the physical symptoms. Remember, you deserve all the tools available to thrive—not just survive—this transition. CONNECT WITH ASHLEY TURNER: Instagram Work with Ashley!  CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA: Instagram LinkedIn Work with Gabriella!  Resources Mentioned: Mycelio-Pause: Using Mushrooms in the Menopausal TransitionThe Psilocybin Guidebook for Women by Jennifer ChesakAndrew Huberman's podcast on psilocybin and neuroscienceGolden Rule (female-owned psilocybin microdosing company based in Colorado)UK study on microdosing and menopauseBrian Johnson's live-streamed psilocybin macro dose journey Celebrate Valentine’s Week with the Oooh Palm Massager giveaway from OBO, created for midlife bodies. Leave a review for Pleasure in the Pause, screenshot it, and DM @gabriellaespinosa on Instagram to enter.  Full episodes on YouTube. The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.

    1h 7m
  6. 85 | Breaking the Silence: Reclaiming Sexual Desire and Pleasure During Menopause with Gabriella Espinosa

    JAN 7

    85 | Breaking the Silence: Reclaiming Sexual Desire and Pleasure During Menopause with Gabriella Espinosa

    Are you experiencing low libido, loss of sexual desire, or intimacy challenges during perimenopause or menopause? In this episode of Pleasure in the Pause, host Gabriela Espinosa joins Dr. Anna Cabeca on The Girlfriend Doctor Show to share her deeply personal story of sexual awakening during midlife.  Together, they address one of the most common yet rarely discussed symptoms of perimenopause: the complete loss of sexual desire. Gabriela opens up about how her libido plummeted overnight, leaving her without the language to describe what was happening—and the transformative journey that led her to become a sexual wellness coach.  Dr. Anna Cabeca is a board-certified gynecologist, women's health expert, and hormone specialist known as "The Girlfriend Doctor." She is passionate about empowering women to reclaim their health, hormones, and vitality during midlife and beyond. Dr. Anna specializes in sexual health, intimacy, and menopause care, helping women address the "three Ds" that affect intimacy: desire, disconnect, and discomfort. She is the creator of innovative vulvar health products designed to support women's sexual wellness during hormonal transitions. Through her podcast, online communities, and clinical work, Dr. Anna provides practical, compassionate guidance for women navigating perimenopause and menopause. Key Takeaways Loss of libido during perimenopause is biological, not personal failure.Most women don't know their own pleasure anatomy.Arousal in midlife requires time, presence, and communication.The three Ds affect intimacy (desire, disconnect, discomfort), but the three Ps restore it.Unpacking shame and inherited narratives is essential work.Your body isn't broken, and menopause isn't the end of pleasure—it's an invitation to discover yourself in new ways.  Subscribe to Pleasure in the Pause for more honest conversations about female sexuality, menopause, and reclaiming your power in midlife. CONNECT WITH DR ANNA CABECA: Website Instagram Products Books Podcast Episode CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA: Instagram LinkedIn Work with Gabriella!  Celebrate Valentine’s Week with the Oooh Palm Massager giveaway from OBO, created for midlife bodies. Leave a review for Pleasure in the Pause, screenshot it, and DM @gabriellaespinosa on Instagram to enter.  Full episodes on YouTube. The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.

    48 min
  7. 84 | Midlife Reflections: What 2025 Taught Me About Menopause, Pleasure & Aging Well

    JAN 1

    84 | Midlife Reflections: What 2025 Taught Me About Menopause, Pleasure & Aging Well

    Are you feeling the weight of another year passing while navigating the changes of perimenopause and menopause? Do you struggle to make sense of midlife transitions—the shifting hormones, changing body, evolving desires, and the pressure to have it all figured out? In this intimate end-of-year solo episode of Pleasure In The Pause, host Gabriela Espinosa guides you through a reflective journey to release what no longer serves you and reclaim what matters most as you step into 2026.  Whether you're grappling with metabolic changes, declining desire, or simply feeling invisible in a youth-obsessed culture, this episode offers evidence-based insights on the future of midlife health, sexual wellness, and longevity—plus powerful journaling prompts to help you transition into the new year with clarity, confidence, and self-trust. Highlights from our discussion include: Midlife health is entering the mainstreamSexual wellness is finally recognized as healthcarePolicy victories matter for your careNew podcast segments to support your journeyReflection is an act of self-careAs you close out 2025 and step into the new year, remember this truth: your pleasure has no expiration date. Your body, your desires, and your wisdom matter exactly as they are right now.  Take time this week to work through the journaling prompts shared in this episode—ask yourself what you're ready to carry forward and what you're ready to leave behind.  Then, submit your questions for the new "Ask Me Anything" segment anonymously to hello@pleasureinthepause.com No question is too personal or too awkward—this is your shame-free space.  Subscribe to Pleasure In The Pause so you don't miss the exciting new conversations coming in 2026, and share this episode with a woman in your life who needs permission to prioritize her pleasure and step into her next chapter with confidence. LINKS MENTIONED: Let’s Talk Menopause Midlife Private Parts Hot Document CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA: Instagram LinkedIn Work with Gabriella!  Celebrate Valentine’s Week with the Oooh Palm Massager giveaway from OBO, created for midlife bodies. Leave a review for Pleasure in the Pause, screenshot it, and DM @gabriellaespinosa on Instagram to enter.  Full episodes on YouTube. The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.

    31 min
  8. 83 | The Best of 2025: Hormones, Desire & Pleasure for Midlife Women

    12/24/2025

    83 | The Best of 2025: Hormones, Desire & Pleasure for Midlife Women

    Are you struggling with hormone therapy that isn't working? Wondering why testosterone for women is so hard to access? Feeling confused about vaginal estrogen warnings? This special Best of 2025 episode of Pleasure In The Pause tackles the most pressing questions midlife women asked this year about hormone optimization, sexual satisfaction, and reclaiming pleasure during perimenopause and menopause. Host Gabriela Espinosa revisits the year's most downloaded conversations—featuring leading women's health experts discussing hormone therapy optimization, the truth about testosterone for women, the historic FDA hearing on vaginal estrogen, redefining sexual satisfaction in midlife, exploring fantasy and desire, and discovering the five essential pleasure principles every woman should know. Whether you're navigating symptoms, considering hormone therapy, or simply want to feel more alive in your body, this episode delivers evidence-based insights and empowering tools for thriving through midlife. Featuring conversations with Dr. Jila Senemar, Dr. Susan Hardwich-Smith, Dr. Laurie Mintz, and Lauren Elise Rogers.  Highlights from our discussion include: The "big three" hormones—estradiol, progesterone, and testosterone—each address different menopausal symptoms, and treatment should be individualized based on your top priorities like sleep, mood, energy, or libido.Women naturally produce more testosterone than estradiol throughout their lives, yet have zero FDA-approved testosterone products compared to men's 20+, despite proven benefits for libido, bone health, muscle mass, and cognitive function.Low-dose vaginal estrogen cannot be detected in the bloodstream yet carries an unfounded FDA black box warning, preventing millions of women from accessing a safe treatment that prevents 50% of UTIs.Only 4-18% of women orgasm from penetration alone, and less than 2% use penetration when masturbating—closing the pleasure gap requires prioritizing clitoral stimulation as the main event, not just "foreplay."Erotic fantasy, built on the four cornerstones of longing, taboo, power, and ambivalence, can be a healthy springboard to arousal when integrated openly rather than pushed into the shadows.A turned-on life in midlife isn't about performance or sexy lingerie—it's about living in alignment with what fuels your joy, vitality, and truth, whether through art, nature, movement, or intimate touch.2025 was a turning point for women's health—from historic FDA hearings to conversations shattering decades of sexual myths and medical dogma. These six episodes represent what midlife women are hungry for: truth, empowerment, and permission to reclaim pleasure on their own terms. As you move into 2026, remember that your pleasure isn't optional—it's your birthright. Whether you're advocating for better hormone therapy, learning what actually brings you to orgasm, or discovering what makes you feel fully alive, this is your invitation to thrive. CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA: Instagram LinkedIn Celebrate Valentine’s Week with the Oooh Palm Massager giveaway from OBO, created for midlife bodies. Leave a review for Pleasure in the Pause, screenshot it, and DM @gabriellaespinosa on Instagram to enter.  Full episodes on YouTube. The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.

    35 min
4.1
out of 5
9 Ratings

About

Menopause doesn't mean the end of pleasure — it’s a new beginning! Pleasure in the Pause is the podcast redefining midlife for women ready to reconnect with their bodies, pleasure, and power — at every stage of the menopause journey and beyond. Hosted by Gabriella Espinosa, certified menopause coach and sexual health advocate, each episode features informative and thought-provoking conversations with doctors, thought leaders, and wellness experts on hormones, sexual health, desire, and healthy aging. Expect actionable strategies and empowering insights to help you feel more confident, energized, and connected to your body — no matter your age. Together, we’ll reframe the conversation around pleasure, sex, and midlife so you can be the best advocate for your body — in and out of the bedroom. Because PLEASURE HAS NO EXPIRATION DATE! Say YES! to Pleasure at www.pleasureinthepause.com

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