363 episodes

In The Adult Chair, Michelle Chalfant applies her holistic approach to healing and transformation as a foundation for better understanding our relationship with ourselves and our relationship with stress, anxiety, depression, physical health, self-love, peace, emotional balance, and how our understanding of ourselves impacts the most important relationships in our lives.

The Adult Chair Michelle Chalfant

    • Education
    • 4.9 • 1.3K Ratings

In The Adult Chair, Michelle Chalfant applies her holistic approach to healing and transformation as a foundation for better understanding our relationship with ourselves and our relationship with stress, anxiety, depression, physical health, self-love, peace, emotional balance, and how our understanding of ourselves impacts the most important relationships in our lives.

    Summer Series: Emotional Mastery with Dr. Joan Rosenberg

    Summer Series: Emotional Mastery with Dr. Joan Rosenberg

    We all experience emotions, but most of us don’t really understand what emotions are. These feelings can drastically alter our day, our life and our experience in the world, yet they’re intangible and often messy and confusing. It’s no wonder many of us try to avoid them altogether.
     
    Well, get ready to have your mind blown and to see emotions in a whole new light in this brilliant episode with Dr. Joan Rosenberg. Dr. Rosenberg began her study of emotions when she was trying to figure out what made some people confident in life, and her finding was surprising: confidence didn’t just come from a sense of self-esteem but from our ability to handle uncomfortable emotions.
     
    As she dug deeper into the human emotional experience, she uncovered a world of surprises around our understanding of emotions and how we can better process, experience and master our emotions.
     
    We talked about why emotions are so uncomfortable for us (it’s not why you think), what a compliment really is and why it matters so much, what drives fear, anxiety and grief, our fears around emotions and how we get stuck in emotion. Dr. Joan also shares her formula for feeling, experiencing and expressing the eight core emotions in an authentic way that helps them truly move through us.
     
    Listen to discover:
    The unexpected key to building confidence "The Rosenberg Reset" formula to build confidence The 3 things that cause our uncomfortable feelings to linger (it's not the feelings themselves!) Steps to build more confidence The true power of a compliment (this one left me speechless) What's actually underneath fear and anxiety Why we need to both feel AND express our emotions  
    As much as I talk about emotions, I was still left speechless more than once in this episode as Dr. Rosenberg got to the heart of what is really beneath certain emotions and my perspective was shifted in so many ways. This is a truly empowering show that will help you live a more balanced and confident life.
     
    “We need to learn as humans how to feel our emotions.” - Michelle Chalfant
     
    “The ability or the capacity to handle unpleasant feelings really is the foundation of confidence.” - Dr Joan Rosenberg
     
    “I think of confidence as the deep sense that you can handle the emotional outcome of whatever you face or whatever you pursue.” - Dr. Joan Rosenberg
     
    "We're one interconnected whole...The brain is always feeding information to the body, and the body is always feeding information to the brain." Dr. Joan Rosenberg
     
    "It comes down to handling short-lived bodily sensation waves." - Dr. Joan Rosenberg
     
    "100% of the time that sensation morphs and vanishes if they stay with it." - Michelle Chalfant
     
    "We metabolize feeling by feeling it and expressing it." - Dr. Joan Rosenberg
     
    "If you want to stop your ruminating thoughts, you have to feel the emotion that's underneath the rumination." - Michelle Chalfant
     
    "I think of the ability to speak up as the superglue to confidence." - Dr. Joan Rosenberg
     
    "A compliment is a reflection of you back to you." - Dr. Joan Rosenberg
     
    "What looks like arrogance is insecurity." - Dr. Joan Rosenberg
     
    "Disguised grief is the gap between what we wanted, what we needed, what we felt we deserved and what we really got." - Dr. Joan Rosenberg
     
     
    LINKS & RESOURCES
    Dr. Joan Rosenberg
    https://drjoanrosenberg.com/ 
     
    “90 Seconds to a Life You Love” (Dr. Joan Rosenberg book)
    https://www.amazon.com/Seconds-Life-You-Love-Authenticity/dp/1478999764 
     
    Dr. Joan Rosenberg TED Talk
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKy19WzkPxE 
     
     
    MORE ADULT CHAIR
    The Adult Chair® Website
    https://theadultchair.com 
     
    The Adult Chair® Membership
    https://theadultchair.com/membership/
     
    The Adult Chair® Events
    https://theadultchair.com/events/
     
    The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
    https://theadultchair.com/certification
     
     
    STAY CONNECTED
    Instagram: https://www.

    • 59 min
    Summer Series: How to Save and Strengthen Your Relationship with Matt Fray

    Summer Series: How to Save and Strengthen Your Relationship with Matt Fray

    You think you’re a good person, you genuinely love your partner and you try to do the right thing …so why are you struggling in your relationship? Why do you and your partner feel unhappy, disconnected and maybe even headed for divorce?
     
    These are the questions Matt Fray asked himself after his marriage ended. He knew he was a decent guy. He knew he had loved his wife, been faithful and done the things he thought he was “supposed” to do in a marriage – yet one day she came to him and asked for a divorce. As he walked through the grief and pain of that experience, he began a journey of self-reflection and blogging to try to understand what went wrong and how people can truly have healthy relationships.
     
    What he uncovered was a series of small habits and dynamics that added up in his relationship and eroded trust and safety over time…and that these dynamics exist in nearly all relationships, including relationships made up of good people who really do love each other. Now, he’s on a mission to help good people become good partners by understanding the root of relationship problems and how to fix them.
     
    In this episode, Matt reveals the invisible habits that kill relationships, how we can turn our relationships around and how to build trust, safety and lifelong love.
     
    Listen to discover:
    Matt’s story of his marriage ending and what he did next The habits and blind spots that damage and even destroy our relationships The three ways we invalidate people unintentionally Why defensiveness can be so damaging The importance of empathy and consideration in relationships How to break the cycle of invalidation and build trust and safety Nothing in life is static. Either we’re cultivating our relationships and on a trajectory of trust or we’re neglecting our relationships and on a trajectory of breakdown. Too often, we can’t see this trajectory until it all falls apart. I love Matt’s work because he’s helping us open our eyes to the invisible ways we’re either creating or damaging our relationships, even when things seem “fine,” and giving us one of the most important gifts a person can have: the power of choice to do things differently and change the trajectory we’re on.
    “There’s so much power in that ‘I’m not alone’ experience.” - Matt Fray
     
    “That’s when healing truly began — when I took ownership and responsibility for my lot in life.” - Matt Fray
     
    “When you think you’re a good person, it’s so easy to not accept responsibility for harm that’s being experienced by someone else.”- Matt Fray
     
    “Very good people who really, truly love each other can do this to one another.” - Matt Fray
     
    “Once you associate invalidation with the erosion of trust, then you can make the conscious decision to validate.” - Matt Fray
     
    “When we go through something unusual, it is our job to share, ‘You know, I really need help with this,’ and it’s our partner’s job to show up and say, ‘I’ve got you.’” - Michelle Chalfant
     
    “It’s not about being right – it’s being there in it with that person.” - Michelle Chalfant
     
    “The low-hanging fruit…is ‘I’m not going to invalidate.’” - Matt Fray
     
     
    LINKS & RESOURCES
    Matt Fray Website
    https://matthewfray.com/
     
    “This Is How Your Marriage Ends” (Matt Fray book)
    https://www.amazon.com/This-Your-Marriage-Ends-Relationships/dp/0063072254/
     
    “The Mask You Live In” Documentary
    https://therepproject.org/films/the-mask-you-live-in/
     
     
    MORE ADULT CHAIR
    The Adult Chair® Website
    https://theadultchair.com 
     
    The Adult Chair® Membership
    https://theadultchair.com/membership/
     
    The Adult Chair® Events
    https://theadultchair.com/events/
     
    The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
    https://theadultchair.com/certification
     
     
    STAY CONNECTED
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
     
    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com

    • 1 hr 5 min
    Summer Series: Finding your True Self with Dr. Shefali

    Summer Series: Finding your True Self with Dr. Shefali

    The world around us demands so much of us. If we’re not careful, it can erode our souls, steal our true selves and get us to believe lies about the source of our worth. We have to become conscious and aware to step into our true power and a whole, awakened life.
     
    I have been a huge fan of Dr. Shefali for years. I got SO much out of her work on conscious parenting when my kids were young, and it’s no wonder she’s become so well known for her work. But her new book might just be my favorite yet — I truly couldn’t put it down (it’s SO aligned with The Adult Chair®) — and I’m beyond thrilled to have her on the show to discuss how to have a radical (and beautiful) awakening in life.
     
    In this conversation, we explore the way our ego and our social conditioning covers up the true self and keeps us from living free lives. This can be especially true for those oriented towards giving, nurturing and connecting. Society takes these gifts and trains us to be outward focused, seeking praise, validation and approval instead of turning inward and claiming who we really are.
     
    Dr. Shefali shares her own story of awakening, when she realized that despite her work, she was living in the “matrix” and ignoring her true wants and needs to try to get love from others (what she calls the “beggar” mentality). By going deep into the often difficult work of looking at the ego and the masks we all wear, she was able to strip away the lies and see what was true — and step into the authentic self-love and self-care we all deserve.
     
    Listen to discover:
    Shefali’s own radical awakening The trap women (and men) fall into How to stop suppressing the true self What soul erosion is and how it forms The “triple threat” women face in childhood The role of the ego in our life What keeps us from awakening (especially in our culture) This is a profound conversation that will take the blinders off and change what you think is normal, while inspiring you to strive for what is truly possible for you — and for all of us.
     
    “We, women especially, need to snap out of our chronic civility, helplessness and unworthiness.”  - Dr. Shefali
     
    “We cannot waste our life never discovering our true self.” - Dr. Shefali
     
    “When we’re told we can only be given worth when we put others before ourselves, now that giving heart leads to an obliteration of ourselves.” - Dr. Shefali
     
    “We’re so disconnected from our true self, we don’t know who we are at all.” - Michelle Chalfant
     
    “The way out is in. We have to go in to heal.” - Michelle Chalfant
     
    “I want what’s on the other side of that wall, but you got to go through the wall, and the wall is our pain.” - Michelle Chalfant
     
    “We tell ourselves the greatest stories in the world, and we don’t know we’re telling ourselves stories.” - Dr. Shefali
     
    “The greatest narcissism is to pretend you’re not a queen or a king and not own your voice.” - Dr. Shefali
     
    Resources
    “A Radical Awakening” Book and Course
    http://aradicalawakening.com/ 
     
    Dr. Shefali Website
    https://www.drshefali.com/
     
    Free Inner Child Resource
    https://theadultchair.com/innerchild
     
    More Adult Chair
    The Adult Chair® Website
    https://theadultchair.com 
     
    The Adult Chair® Membership
    https://theadultchair.com/membership/
     
    The Adult Chair® Events
    https://theadultchair.com/events/
     
    The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
    https://theadultchair.com/certification-program/
     
    Stay Connected
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
     
    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
     
    The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
     
    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

    • 38 min
    Summer Series: The Anxiety Survival Guide with The Anxiety Sisters

    Summer Series: The Anxiety Survival Guide with The Anxiety Sisters

    Do you know what anxiety really feels like? I’m not talking about the emotions of fear or stress, but what it feels like in your body.
    So many of us live with anxiety and don’t even know it because it’s SO physical. It’s even easy to mistake it for physical disease, like heart issues or digestive issues.
    That was the case for Abbe Greenberg and Maggie Sarachek, two soul sisters who are both mental health professionals and the founders of Anxiety Sisters, a supportive community for those living with anxiety. Though they can now see how their anxiety began showing up in early childhood, for years, they bounced from doctor to doctor and even spent time in the hospital before realizing the root cause of their suffering was anxiety.
    This began their passion to help raise awareness around anxiety and help anxiety sufferers learn how to live full, happy lives – anxiety and all. We had an incredible conversation about all things anxiety and how to heal it, and I resonated with so many parts of their story…these ladies are the real deal!
    Listen to discover:
    Our stories of recognizing and healing anxiety How anxiety manifests as physical symptoms The power of acceptance in managing anxiety Why connection is key to healing anxiety How to pack a "spin kit" so you'll be prepared when anxiety strikes The difference between anxiety and a panic attack How to overcome phobias and agoraphobia I know I have a lot of favorite topics, but anxiety is one I really feel we can't talk about enough. Too many people in the world are suffering from anxiety without even knowing it, and we have so many tools – from our support system to our sensory system – to help us find peace and balance in life.
    It’s not about never feeling anxious again, but learning how to find your own brand of happiness and how to take charge so anxiety no longer runs the show.
    "I still didn't have the vocabulary or the words to make these connections of what I was feeling and how that was connected to anxiety."  - Maggie Sarachek
     
    "Anxiety becomes really debilitating when it's in the driver's seat." - Abbe Greenberg
     
    "I think there is this process of accepting anxiety." - Maggie Sarachek
     
    "Acceptance doesn't mean anything other than, 'This is where I am.’" - Michelle Chalfant
     
    "Our brand of happy is anxious happy." - Abbe Greenberg
     
    "Anxiety can no longer sneak up on you. And when it can't sneak up on you, it takes away two thirds of its power." - Abbe Greenberg
     
    "No two people have the same exact anxiety and panic." - Michelle Chalfant
     
    LINKS & RESOURCES
    Anxiety Sisters Website
    https://anxietysisters.com/
     
    Anxiety Sisters Facebook
    https://www.facebook.com/anxietysisters
    *Home of a Tuesday night book club + supportive community
     
    The Spin Cycle (Anxiety Sisters Podcast)
    https://anxietysisters.com/podcasts/
     
    "The Anxiety Sisters' Survival Guide" (Anxiety Sisters Book)
    https://anxietysisters.com/anxiety-sisters-survival-guide/ 
     
    The Adult Chair® Private Facebook Group
    https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/  
     
    MORE ADULT CHAIR
    The Adult Chair® Website
    https://theadultchair.com 
     
    The Adult Chair® Membership
    https://theadultchair.com/membership/
     
    The Adult Chair® Events
    https://theadultchair.com/events/
     
    The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
    https://theadultchair.com/certification
     
    STAY CONNECTED
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
     
    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
     
    The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
     
    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

    • 55 min
    Summer Series: Overcoming Trauma and Limiting Beliefs with Michael Unbroken

    Summer Series: Overcoming Trauma and Limiting Beliefs with Michael Unbroken

    We all have limiting beliefs that hold us back in life. But what if you’ve experienced significant trauma as well? How do you distinguish between a trauma response and limiting or negative thinking? How do you find the power to heal when things have happened that were out of your control?
     
    My guest today, Michael Unbroken, has an intense and powerful story of overcoming unspeakable trauma, growing up with abuse, addiction and homelessness. At one point, he wanted to end his own life. But he made a decision to live, and in doing so, discovered that the only path forward started within.
     
    In this incredible conversation, Michael shares how he was able to break the cycle of trauma in his life and consciously choose a different path for himself. This is an inspiring and vulnerable conversation that will challenge you to take ownership of your life, treat yourself with grace and kindness and live life fully!
    Listen to discover:
    Michael’s incredible story of healing from trauma and turning his life around The steps for overcoming limiting beliefs How to get past fear and start living your life How to actually change your life (and why you have to get out of the way first) The power of vulnerability The importance of a mentor Transforming limiting beliefs starts with taking ownership of the way we think about life, no matter what we’ve been through. What happened to us is not our fault, but it does become our job to take responsibility for it and make a choice to create the healthy, whole life we want to live. We all have the power to do this, and I hope this episode inspires you to find everything that’s possible for you.
     
    “It’s never going to be one thing that changes your life.” - Michael Unbroken
     
    “What you think becomes what you speak. What you speak becomes your actions, and your actions become your reality.” - Michael Unbroken
     
    “If we’re sitting waiting for someone to rescue us, we’re in the seat of the victim.” - Michelle Chalfant
     
    “We have to create different. We have to create better. If we want a different life, we have to make different choices.” - Michelle Chalfant
     
    “It will change everything about the fabric of your experience of this life when you’re willing to be real.” - Michael Unbroken
     
    LINKS & RESOURCES
    Michael Unbroken Website
    https://www.thinkunbroken.com/
     
    Michael Unbroken Podcast
    https://www.thinkunbrokenpodcast.com/
     
    Michael Unbroken Instagram
    https://www.instagram.com/michaelunbroken/
     
    Michael Unbroken Facebook
    https://www.facebook.com/MichaelUnbroken/
     
    MORE ADULT CHAIR
    The Adult Chair® Website
    https://theadultchair.com 
     
    The Adult Chair® Membership
    https://theadultchair.com/membership/
     
    The Adult Chair® Events
    https://theadultchair.com/events/
     
    The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
    https://theadultchair.com/certification
     
     
    STAY CONNECTED
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
     
    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
     
    The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
     
    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

    • 41 min
    Summer Series 1: Narcissistic Abuse Explained with Caroline Strawson

    Summer Series 1: Narcissistic Abuse Explained with Caroline Strawson

    Sometimes, it takes losing everything you know to start over and begin the journey of healing.
     
    Caroline Strawson is an internationally recognized trauma-informed therapist and coach who helps her clients recover from narcissistic abuse and complex PTSD and create thriving lives. Her journey began with her own story of loss when, in a very short period of time, her mother passed away, her narcissistic husband left her and their two young children and she discovered he had gotten them into $100,000 of debt, leading to the loss of her home and the life she had built.
     
    Facing PTSD, anxiety, depression, self-harm, guilt and shame, Caroline turned inward and took a close look at herself, her life and her relationships – and has since become a leader in trauma-informed recovery and healing from abuse.
     
    In this conversation, Caroline shares her story of overcoming narcissistic abuse, how she finally recognized the abuse and how she began the journey of healing. She offers deep insights into how childhood wounding forms, how we develop “protector parts” and how those parts can lead to struggles like codependency and narcissism. She is a wealth of knowledge on trauma, how we get stuck in life, and how to move forward.
     
    Listen to discover:
    The source of childhood wounding and trauma How our nervous system is designed to protect us Why codependents and narcissists are magnets for each other (and why it's easier for the codependent to change) How we can feel compassion for wounded people without accepting abuse Why people stay in abusive relationships and how to help a friend in an abusive relationship The difference between PTSD and complex PTSD How to begin building self-worth even if you're still in an abusive relationship  
    Whether you’ve been in a relationship with a narcissist or not, you will get SO much out of this episode and gain a greater understanding of why you do what you do, what is going on in your brain in relation to trauma, and how to heal your wounding so you can form healthier relationships with self and others.
     
    "Initially I was waiting for that epiphany of him changing to then be ok for me to move forward. And of course, that isn't the case. Because we can't change anybody."  - Caroline Strawson
    "Trauma isn't a person. It's not an event. It's what I feel and what I'm saying to myself about those events." - Caroline Strawson
    "Our system all of the time is working to keep us safe, keep us alive, protect us, and move us away from the biggest perceived pain.” - Caroline Strawson
    "No narcissist is born. They are created from their childhood." - Caroline Strawson 
    "The codependent is giving, giving, giving trying to soothe their self-worthiness wounds. The narcissist is like, 'Give it to me. I'll take, take, take,’ to soothe their self-worthiness wounds." - Caroline Strawson
    "I think of narcissism on a scale." - Michelle Chalfant
    "When we're in these relationships, our reality is so distorted. To build self-worth is to then start seeing reality much clearer." - Michelle Chalfant
    "Grounding and getting all five senses online also helps us with our reality. We stop doubting ourselves." - Michelle Chalfant
     
    LINKS & RESOURCES
    Caroline Strawson Website
    https://www.carolinestrawson.com/
     
    Caroline Strawson Facebook
    https://www.facebook.com/carolinestrawson/
     
    Caroline Strawson Instagram
    https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
     
    “Divorce Became My Superpower” (Caroline Strawson Book)
    https://www.amazon.com/Divorce-Became-Superpower-Caroline-Strawson/dp/1726255549
     
    MORE ADULT CHAIR
    The Adult Chair® Website
    https://theadultchair.com 
     
    The Adult Chair® Membership
    https://theadultchair.com/membership/
     
    The Adult Chair® Events
    https://theadultchair.com/events/
     
    The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
    https://theadultchair.com/certification
     
     
    STAY CONNECTED
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
     
    Faceboo

    • 1 hr 9 min

Customer Reviews

4.9 out of 5
1.3K Ratings

1.3K Ratings

mendingtrauma ,

Inspiring and Motivating

Michelle is a master interviewer and is able to consistently inspire and motivate others to continue along the healing journey. Her commitment to a holistic approach is refreshing and truly validates the spiritual alongside the physical and mental. This is a must listen!

kcinbloom ,

My Daily Listen

A friend introduced me to the Adult Chair podcast 6 months ago and learning to use the tools of the adult chair has helped me so much in my recovery walk that it has become a part of my daily ritual in the morning. Many, many topics touch on what I have and am still struggling with. Through learning to sit in my emotions, I am learning to let go of some real heavy stuff I’ve carried around and treat myself and my loved ones with more compassion. Thanks Michelle

dr.n.educatenow.podcast ,

Dr. N. - Gratitude 🙏

I love 💕 this podcast because Michelle is inspiring, insightful & informative. I’ve implemented several principles & strategies to my life as a result of this show.
Dr. Nesser- The Life is a Classroom Podcast

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