The Deeper Pulse with Candice Schutter

Candice Schutter

Hi. I'm Candice Schutter. I started this podcast during the pandemic, repackaging personal stories as self-help epiphanies because old habits die hard and turning pain into profit was at the heart of what I had long bought and sold as a new-age grifter. Eventually, I began to look more critically at two decades spent in spirituality and wellness circles. Sharing about those years publicly for the first time (See Episode 33) led me into the world of cult recovery, and I soon after became a wellness cult whistleblower. The Deeper Pulse offers cultural commentary alongside in-real-time recovery as my guests and I grapple with moral injuries in the aftermath of spiritual abuse and the toxic positivity that silenced us. Finally free(ish) from the myopia of self-help 'cult'ure, the pod now focuses primarily on current events, social justice, and ongoing critiques of leadership that disrupt the hierarchical frameworks that live inside and around us.

  1. #94 - Doctrine Over Person: A Convo on Cult Recovery, Anti-Vax Denialism, & Being ‘Gay Again’ | T Brown

    ١٠ سبتمبر

    #94 - Doctrine Over Person: A Convo on Cult Recovery, Anti-Vax Denialism, & Being ‘Gay Again’ | T Brown

    This episode is dedicated to American psychiatrist and author Robert Jay Lifton, who recently passed after decades of research into the psychology of totalism. “Doctrine over person” is one of Lifton’s eight criteria of thought reform; it’s widely considered to be a defining characteristic of the cultic headspace. But how exactly does it function? Meet T Brown. In 1997, T entered a Sufi group as a free-thinking, openly gay man. But he eventually discarded his personal eccentricities, married a woman, and became a public defender of the group’s apolitical, anti-vax ideology. In this episode, T shares how his life became “occupied” by the guru’s teachings. When the pandemic gave him the space he needed, T finally separated from the group after 23 years, and the journey of cult recovery began. Five years later, T is completing his doctoral dissertation and is debuting the performance of "A Cult Piece" at the Melbourne Fringe Festival. He tells us how the cult mindset impacted his choices, his family, and his sense of self. And he shares what it was like coming out of the cult (and to his wife) to re-enter the real world, free and disoriented. This episode is a deep dive into the paradox that often defines the journey of cult recovery. The end is just the beginning. Embodiment informs critical thinking. Art imitates life. And audacious self-acceptance slowly and steadily dispels a once all-consuming ideology. Learn more about T Brown by visiting his QuitYourCult YouTube channel. Support the show The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization. Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates.

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  2. #93 - The End of Aliases + Liberation Is Free | Solo Episode

    ٢٠ أغسطس

    #93 - The End of Aliases + Liberation Is Free | Solo Episode

    Risk is relative, and fascism places everything in perspective. As such, this episode puts an end to ‘Org’ aliases (because, why not?) before reiterating the purpose that has been core since the 'cult'ure series inception. It was never about one specific brand or a few bad players. It's about every one of us owning up to our complicity and passive acceptance of cult-capitalistic norms. Did you know that the once-fringe Wellness Industry is now worth more than Big Pharma? So it's no surprise that the confluence of pseudoscience and capitalism has given birth to the MAHA movement, which relies heavily on reflexive denialism and a lack of evidential accountability. New-age wellness culture is at least in part to blame, particularly the way that high-vibe religious zeal and spiritual supremacy have become normalized. In this episode, I reflect on my past work as a wellness grifter, where I inadvertently perpetuated colonizer logic by creating top-down sales funnels that exploited people’s vulnerabilities for personal gain. I also speak explicitly about the launch of some former Nia (oops, there it is) influencers who are pitching a program of "liberation" in the aftermath of exiting high-demand influence and highlight six specific reasons why regular listeners of this podcast may want to be wary. Support the show The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization. Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates.

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  3. Trauma & Control: How Authoritarianism Shows Up In Wellness Culture & In Our Bodies | Magdalena Weinstein (ENCORE)

    ٢٣ يوليو

    Trauma & Control: How Authoritarianism Shows Up In Wellness Culture & In Our Bodies | Magdalena Weinstein (ENCORE)

    It's time for another encore! Ep.67 (originally released September 20, 2023) — Originally from Chile, Magdalena Weinstein spent the first 17 years of her life living under the rule of an authoritarian dictatorship. In this episode, she shares her childhood experiences, family life, and what motivated her to immigrate to the US in 2004. Magdalena speaks very candidly about the challenges of being in immigrant in America, and about time spent in a series of traumatizing and controlling environments - dictatorship in her formative years that stoked an early hunger for autonomy; years spent as an Iyengar yoga student and teacher striving for whitewashed dominion over her body; and a decade of investment in a coaching program where she experienced mind control and ongoing racial micro-aggressions. She generously shares each of these stories with us, poignantly illustrating what all of these seemingly unrelated experiences have in common. In 2019, Magdalena trained as a trauma specialist. In the final third of the episode, she helps us understand how trauma related to control is stored in the body and what, both individually and collectively, we can do about it. She describes the differences between control and personal agency, particularly in terms of owning and choosing psychological and somatic states. Then, Magdalena calls on wellness practitioners to trade Western idealism for a more realistic and collective approach to the growing challenges we now face as humans. Magdalena Weinstein, SEP (she/her), is a Somatic Trauma Specialist who offers trauma recovery interventions utilizing Somatic Experiencing®, Touch Skills, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, the Safe and Sound Protocol (SSP), Parts Work, and Biodynamic Craniosacral Therapy perspectives. Blending the fields of Somatics, Neurology, and Social Justice, she is committed to helping individuals and groups transition towards personal, ancestral, and collective trauma healing. Her specialties are developmental and complex trauma, C-PTSD, PTSD, chronic conditions, domestic violence, and sexual assault trauma, and social justice dynamics, including racial trauma, immigration trauma, and war trauma. Originally from Chile, she was born and raised in a Dictatorship for her first 17 years of life and immigrated to the USA in 2004. She lives in a rural home in Mendocino, Northern California (on unceded Pomo Territory), with her husband, their two children, dogs, cats, and snakes. She has a private practice in her home studio, is an assistant at SE trainings, and is a member of the DEI committee at Somatic Experiencing International. She is also finishing the first year of Biodynamic Craniosacral Therapy Training. Referenced In This Episode: Heather Cox Richardson - September 11, 2023Doppelganger: A Trip into the Mirror World, by Naomi KleinSapiens: A Brief History of Humankind, by Yuval Noah Harari Support the show The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization. Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates.

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  4. #92 - 'Mean Girl': Parasocial Influence, Spilling the Tea, & Red-Flag Reminders for 'Org' Apostates

    ١٦ يوليو

    #92 - 'Mean Girl': Parasocial Influence, Spilling the Tea, & Red-Flag Reminders for 'Org' Apostates

    “My mouth is a fire escape. The words coming out don't care that they are naked. There is something burning in here.” ~ Andrea Gibson (RIP 🙏🏽💕) It's time I spoke to the 'mean girl' label. It's been tossed around a bit too liberally for my taste, so I've decided to risk the high-road backlash and tell you what I’ve really been thinking and feeling. Am I a mean girl? I'll let you decide. I kick things off with an excerpt from a recent Patreon drop on parasocial influence — the one-sided connection we feel with a leader, influencer, or public figure who we’ve never met in person and/or have had only minimal contact with. From there, I discuss the sometimes imperceptible line folks draw between saying what’s real and mean-girling, and in doing so, I offer a critical heads up: Fawning isn’t friendship; it's high-vibe avoidance. Also, the postfeminist co-opting of 'cult'ure series content is something I saw coming, and alas, that day is here. I tell you why the recent launches of some high-profile Org apostates are about what I expected. Referenced in this episode: The Madness Vase, by Andrea Gibson (book of poems)#84 - Q Her A (final episode of the ‘cult’ure series)STC #21 | Parasocial Relationships - Empathy & Influence In A Digital Age (full episode on Patreon)#59 - The Victim Label: Gaslighting, Victim Shaming, & Tone Policing for Social Control  Support the show The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization. Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates.

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  5. #91 - Beyond The Binary: A Critical Look at Gender Essentialism

    ٢٥ يونيو

    #91 - Beyond The Binary: A Critical Look at Gender Essentialism

    This pic you see in the episode thumbnail was taken at an LA photo shoot back in 2002. I’m sharing it now because, in today’s pod release, I include personal stories that challenge the gender binary. And if your brain is suddenly scrambling to try and figure me out, that feeling you have is the entire point of this episode. Rather than jumping to conclusions, I hope you’ll listen in. Today’s release takes a critical look at gender essentialism, the socially reinforced belief in a fixed gender binary. I kick things off with some personal stories, sharing why my girliest school photo is the cringiest, about the time I shaved my head in the early aughts, and the name of the book that had me performing "divine femininity" for over a decade. Newsflash: perimenopause can be a real bitch in the best possible way; I tell you how it’s helping me shed the she-shoulds and embrace fuller expression of my humanity. I define gender essentialism and the politics that drive it, speak to how the film industry fails women who are dog-tired of performing womanhood, and offer up a reminder that cis folks are the top consumers of gender-affirming care. I speak about how the most popular nonfiction book from the 90s repackaged and reified gender norms for decades to come, then offer a deep bow and wholehearted shout-out to trans folks who bear the weight of virulent projections because of our collective unwillingness to grapple with social conditioning. Challenging gender essentialism means braving cognitive dissonance and disrupting social norms; this episode may push some long-ago-installed buttons. Before you decide how you feel about it, I encourage you to listen to the entire episode AND explore every resource provided in the show notes (there are lots of folks expressing this stuff better than I can). You might be surprised where it lands you. Referenced in this episode: The Cult of Gender w/ Maxx (TDP #70) w/ Maxx, Troy, & LainieElder Wisdom (TDP #23) w/ Katherine HowellsGender Trouble (Book), by Judith ButlerIf Books Could Kill (Podcast) - Men Are From Mars (Critique)ALOK: Biology! (YouTube) Comedy SpecialHighly Recommended EXTRAS: Beyond XX & XYMimi’s Story - IntersexIn Defense of Misfits (more from Alok) Support the show The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization. Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates.

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  6. #90 - Miss Nature LLC: Uniting Rural Communities & Demystifying Drag | Christopher Jay Hall

    ١٨ يونيو

    #90 - Miss Nature LLC: Uniting Rural Communities & Demystifying Drag | Christopher Jay Hall

    Happy Pride month, y’all! Please help me to welcome lifelong activist and Arizona Drag Show organizer, Christopher Jay Hall, to the pod. Earlier this week, Christopher and his father were featured in a CNN article & this episode is a timely follow-up. Listen in as Christopher shares about his upbringing in rural Arizona, and how he & his dad have repaired their relationship in recent years. Despite his dad’s early-on rejection of his queerness, Christopher came out as a teen and fell heart-first into LGBTQ+ activism. He shares how working with countless nonprofits led to the emergence of his drag persona, Miss Nature. Miss Nature LLC travels regionally, working in collaboration with rural organizers to create inclusive spaces and provide information and resources to underserved communities. Arizona Drag Show performances are generally family-friendly events, which in recent years has led to some virulent pushback from the right, more specifically in the city I currently call home, Cottonwood, Arizona. Thankfully, Miss Nature and local organizers have refused to be bullied & this year the production is offering a larger-than-ever, sold-out performance. Christopher and I dig into some of the common misconceptions about drag (especially as it relates to children), and he shares why he remains steadfast when it comes to bringing LGBTQ+ support to rural areas similar to the one he grew up in. Miss Nature carries on, fierce and full of heart, even when she has to dance on culture-war eggshells to bring her and her glorious entourage on stage. I think my bestie said it best: "Drag Queens have always and will always exist & thank the gay gods for that!!!" Christopher Jay Hall was born in Phoenix, AZ. He has lived all over the U.S. as a child, but spent much of his time growing up in Arizona. He has been in Tucson since 2013. He is a graduate of Northern Arizona University with a Bachelor’s in Public Administration. Christopher loves bringing people together from all walks of life to help support a common cause amongst groups that normally might not come together. He does this best as his persona, Miss Nature, whom he has been bringing to stages across the country for more than a decade. Miss Nature looks forward to bringing the art of drag to new communities that have yet to experience it. She produces the annual Arizona Pride Tour, which is set to expand into New Mexico in 2026.  To learn more about her, visit ⁦MissNatureLLC.com.⁩ Referenced in this episode: Read the CNN article Interview with David Gallegos-RoybalFree Held (Movie 2015) Support the show The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization. Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates.

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  7. #89 - The Penny Peace Project: Rural Organizing & Bridging Culture War Divides | Julie Fernatt & Llama Habern

    ٤ يونيو

    #89 - The Penny Peace Project: Rural Organizing & Bridging Culture War Divides | Julie Fernatt & Llama Habern

    “Be Like Penny.” If you visit my current hometown of Cottonwood, Arizona, you’ll see these three words displayed around town. Penny Smith was a friend to many and a living example of how everyday citizens can make a meaningful difference in their local communities. She passed away in 2021, but her legacy lives on in the hearts of those who know and love her, and also through The Penny Peace Project.  In this episode, I’ll introduce you to Julie Fernatt and Llama Habern, the founders of ROI (Rural Organizing Initiative). Thanks in large part to Penny’s supportive efforts, in 2023, Cottonwood was a planned tour stop for a regional drag company. Evangelical religious leaders mobilized their communities to turn up in droves, and city council meetings became contentious, escalating to threats of violence toward city leaders and community members. That’s when ROI and its partners organized a nonviolent response that effectively silenced right-wing agitators. Listen in to learn how they did it. ROI currently provides civic engagement and supports candidates for local and county offices. Julie & Llama share how community organizing clears channels of communication and helps to build lasting, non-partisan coalitions. We also discuss: running for local office, fundraising, and the upcoming No Kings protest. Local activism is accessible to all and with a little effort, we can all be more like Penny. Rural Organizing Initiative (ROI) is a 501(c)4 non-profit corporation operating in Northern Arizona. ROI promotes full participation in democracy by providing civic education and by supporting/coaching potential candidates for local and county offices. Learn more at roi.vote. Referenced In This Episode: Reach out to ROI for supportLearn more about Penny SmithFind an Indivisible group near youAttend a NoKings Protest near you Support the show The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization. Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates.

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  8. #88 - Power To The People: Decolonizing Our Psyches & Reimagining Leadership | Nikki G

    ٢٨ مايو

    #88 - Power To The People: Decolonizing Our Psyches & Reimagining Leadership | Nikki G

    Nikki G isn’t the type to say “I told you so.” Nevertheless, it was just one year ago when she was on the podcast, walking us through the evangelical vision behind Project 2025 and the looming theocratic dominionism of the far right. Now that the NAR agenda (see Ep.81) is coming to pass, she’s back to regroup. Nikki & I discuss how to maintain sanity and balance under narcissistic rule, what it means to occupy our lane in the resistance, and why an understanding of cult dynamics is such a pragmatic consideration right now. We talk leadership, the intoxication of power, and standing arm-in-arm, steadfast and unwavering in our values, while leaders attempt to colonize our thinking and rob us of hope. This episode is a jam-packed dialogue offering support and a collectivist call to action. For more with Nikki, also see TDP Ep.77 + Ep.81 & 82. Nikki G. is a Certified Trauma Recovery Coach who helps survivors recover and thrive after Religious Trauma & Cult involvement. She is also a survivor of multiple narcissistic relationships, religious trauma, and several cultic communities. Nikki is the CEO of Nikki G Speaks LLC, which provides survivors with individual coaching, online community, and psychoeducation related to religious trauma, narcissistic abuse, and cult involvement. Nikki is a co-host of the podcast Surviving the Black Church, where she and her co-hosts delve into conversations regarding religious trauma in the Black Church. She is also the co-founder of The Black Religious Trauma Recovery Network, and she sits on the board of directors for Tears of Eden, a nonprofit that supports survivors who have experienced abuse in the evangelical community.  nikkigspeaks.com | @nikki_g_speaks Referenced In This Episode: Project 2025 Tracker Support the show The stories and opinions shared in this episode are based on personal experience and are not intended to malign any individual, group, or organization. Join The Deeper Pulse at Patreon for weekly bonus episodes + other exclusive bonus content. Follow The Deeper Pulse on IG @thedeeperpulse + @candiceschutter for more regular updates.

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Hi. I'm Candice Schutter. I started this podcast during the pandemic, repackaging personal stories as self-help epiphanies because old habits die hard and turning pain into profit was at the heart of what I had long bought and sold as a new-age grifter. Eventually, I began to look more critically at two decades spent in spirituality and wellness circles. Sharing about those years publicly for the first time (See Episode 33) led me into the world of cult recovery, and I soon after became a wellness cult whistleblower. The Deeper Pulse offers cultural commentary alongside in-real-time recovery as my guests and I grapple with moral injuries in the aftermath of spiritual abuse and the toxic positivity that silenced us. Finally free(ish) from the myopia of self-help 'cult'ure, the pod now focuses primarily on current events, social justice, and ongoing critiques of leadership that disrupt the hierarchical frameworks that live inside and around us.

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