A bite-sized podcast about traveling while running a business and being an introvert.
Not knowing what introversion was until my 30s, I feel that I wasted some of my early years by not really understanding myself. An inspiration for my business is that I want to help others understand themselves better, earlier on in their careers and their lives. Introversion is a very misunderstood area – introverts can suffer mentally and physically because people typecast them or act negatively towards them. It’s not nice to be trapped in a little box. When you label somebody, they tend to act like that label, which stops people from achieving their true potential. I don’t let being an introvert define me, I let it guide me.
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Ways to say NO
I said no this month. When's the last time you said what you really wanted to say? No. I said no this month and yes to myself. I'm doing a little bit reworking on my programming and so using this time to bring back some of the most popular episodes from the archive. Now, this particular one is about saying no. You might need to say no to request for your time, to borrow your work, to borrow your materials, or even just wanting someone invading your personal or office space with an in person meeting. Here's the thing. No is a complete sentence, but sometimes that doesn't feel just right. So to help you to prepare for the inevitable, grab the download and get your best no face on. No is a complete sentence.
Hello, and welcome to the travelling introvert. Today I want to talk about, and I've talked about this before, but saying no and how to do it the right way it's super easy to feel guilty and want to avoid conflict or simply want to make other people feel good. However, if you don't say no, it can consume your whole life on how other people react and you might get stressed because of other people's happiness. Your happiness is kind of more important. So, in fact, saying no more often is crucial to come to your goals and aspirations.
And actually, it's something that I've struggled with the past couple of weeks where I wanted to say no and I wanted to set boundaries. I found it incredibly hard and so this has been helpful to me. No is not always a negative. Behind every no, there's also a yes. So what I mean is, when you say no, you're also saying yes to another opportunity that can better serve you in your life.
Just because you're saying no doesn't mean like no right now and no forever. Saying no means that you're committed to your values and goals and your boundaries. And you can always say yes without considering everybody. It's fine. The sad truth is, you will always need to think about yourself first.
Establish and stick to your boundaries. The only person you are responsible for is yourself and you can't expect others to know what you need. If you don't speak up, say something practice, assertive communication. Always speak up about your boundaries. And don't be afraid to let others know if they can't respect your boundaries, you don't need them, they're only going to hold you back.
You're only going to feel guilty and resentful on a whole bunch of other things which will just get you down and have you feeling overwhelmed. And I know it's not that easy. So finding the right words is hugely important. You don't just say no. There are other ways to let people know why you can't do it.
Suggest an alternative or provide a reason why you can't do it. Let them know that it doesn't work with your schedule or your timing is wrong. The more you can communicate and the more information you can give them. As far as I'm not doing this because of X, Y and Z, we'll stop them asking you again, but not in a bad way. If you are like, I can't do this on Mondays, then I'll ask you for Tuesdays instead.
So setting the right boundaries and using the right words are really helpful. Take the personal out of it. In other words, you're not saying no to the person asking, you're simply saying no to the activities that they want you to do. Often people don't say no because they're afraid to offend the person. However, not being fully honest with yourself isn't fair on them either.
Instead, realize it isn't about the person, but rather what they asked for. More likely than not, they'll understand why you are respectively declining their request. If you're always saying yes to people and activities that you don't enjoy, then you're not really being you. You're not really living your life. You're living the life you think other people expect from you.
And is that really what you want to do? Yes. You might be avoiding conflict, but you will easily create more by being dishonest with yourself and the people
Stop feeling guilty about self care
Things to do for your staycation
Speaking up is hard do
The lies we tell ourselves
Being sick as an introvert
All Hail the Traveling Introvert
Janice Chaka breaks it down that being an introvert can be a strength for any brazen careerist or aspiring entrepreneur. There are no apologies about not being an extrovert here!
plus, she has a pleasant English voice so it makes for good info and good listening.