The Widow's Collective

Lauren Lentz

The Widow’s Collective is where grief meets hope, healing, and community. Hosted by grief coach and widow, Lauren Lentz, each episode offers tender reflections, real conversations, and practical tools to help you navigate life after loss. Whether you’re in the depths of early grief or learning to reimagine your life in the “after,” you’ll find a gentle space to land here — one that honors your story, your pace, and your humanity.

  1. 23H AGO

    EPISODE 33: “The Parts of You That Existed With Him” (Identity Loss After the Death of a Spouse — Part 3)

    In this final episode of the identity loss series, we explore one of the most tender and complicated parts of grief after the death of a partner: The experience of feeling like certain parts of you only existed because they did… while also slowly realizing that there are still parts of you that remain. This conversation moves into the layered complexity of relational identity, nervous system connection, emotional safety, and the internal conflict many widows experience when they begin noticing themselves still “here” after profound loss. Together, we unpack:  Why certain relationships bring specific versions of us forward  The grief of losing not only your person, but the version of yourself that existed alongside them  Why it can feel confronting when others say “you’re still in there”  The difference between the relationally-activated self and the core self  Why identity disruption after loss can feel like an identity rupture  The emotional tension of holding contradictory truths at the same time  What it means to re-encounter yourself over time  How identity reorganizes through grief  Becoming without erasing the person you were with your partner This episode is not about “finding yourself again.” It’s about learning how to stay in relationship with yourself through the complexity of grief, change, memory, love, and becoming. If this episode brought something up for you, please know there is nothing you need to resolve quickly. You are allowed to grieve what was shaped in love… while also allowing space for what is still unfolding inside of you. Big Hugs and Lots of Love, Lauren Connect with Me Instagram: @imsorrywerefriends  1:1 Coaching + Programs: laurenlentz.com To schedule a Discovery Call, email me at lauren@imsorrywerefriends.com

    20 min

  2. 4D AGO ·  BONUS

    BONUS EPISODE: Mother's Day In The After

    Mother’s Day after the death of a spouse is not a simple day. It is layered. It is emotional. It is often holding multiple truths at once. In this bonus episode, we talk about what it actually means to move through Mother’s Day as a widow and a mother — where love and grief are not separate experiences, but happening side by side. We explore:  The emotional complexity of Mother’s Day after loss  Why this day can feel both tender and heavy at the same time  The missing presence of the person who once witnessed and celebrated your motherhood  How grief reshapes identity and capacity in motherhood  The lived reality of becoming both mother and father after loss  The exhaustion of holding emotional, mental, and logistical responsibility alone  The desire to retreat from a day that feels overwhelming  What it can feel like to show up for your children while in survival The guilt and fear that can surface around “not being enough” as a mother in grief  Why attachment, repair, and presence matter more than perfection  Permission to let Mother’s Day be what it actually is this year, without forcing it into something it’s not This episode is not about doing Mother’s Day “right.” It’s about naming what it actually feels like when you are mothering inside profound loss, and offering space for all of it to exist without judgment. If this resonates, you can share it with someone who may need it, or leave a review to help this work reach more grieving widowed mothers who are walking through something similar. Thank you for being here. Love, Lauren

    17 min

  3. MAY 7

    Episode 32: “There Is No Going Back to Normal” (Identity Loss After the Death of a Spouse — Part 2)

    In this episode, we take a deeper look at what it actually means to live inside identity loss after the death of a spouse. Because while grief is often talked about in terms of emotion—what you feel, how you process, how you “move through it”—there is another layer that doesn’t get named as often. The internal shift. The part where you don’t quite recognize yourself. Where the way you think, respond, decide, and move through the world feels different. Where the version of you that once felt familiar… no longer feels fully accessible. And at the same time, the outside world hasn’t necessarily adjusted to that change. So this episode explores the tension that can exist between those two realities. We talk about: Why the idea of “going back to normal” doesn’t actually apply after this kind of lossHow the expectation to return to a familiar version of yourself can create internal pressureWhat it can feel like to “fake it” or wear a mask in everyday interactionsThe subtle ways you may be adjusting yourself just to make connection feel possibleHow grief can begin to impact your relationships—not because you don’t care, but because your internal world has changedThe experience of social disconnection and the kind of loneliness that can exist even when you’re not physically aloneWhy well-meaning support can sometimes feel misaligned or hard to receiveThe reality that not all relationships will shift in the same way—and what that meansWhy “normal” can feel out of reach, not because you’re doing something wrong, but because the structure that created it is no longer thereIf you found yourself in this conversation—if parts of this felt familiar or hard in a way you couldn’t quite name before—you are not alone in that. If this episode resonated, you can share it with someone who may need it, or leave a review so this space can reach more women who are walking through something similar. I’m really glad you’re here. Ways to Connect & Continue the Work: If you’re looking for support as you navigate your grief, there are a few ways we can stay connected. Instagram: @imsorrywerefriends Website: www.laurenlentz.com Email: lauren@imsorrywerefriends.com On my website, you’ll find more information about my current offerings, including 1:1 grief coaching and group support containers designed specifically for women navigating the loss of a partner. These spaces are not about rushing your grief or trying to move you “forward” before you’re ready. They are about creating room for what’s actually here, and supporting you as you begin to understand and live inside a life that has fundamentally changed.

    18 min

  4. APR 30

    Episode 31: Episode 31: “A Piece of Me Died When He Did” (Identity Loss After the Death of a Spouse — Part 1)

    In this first episode of the series, we’re exploring something that many widows quietly recognize but rarely have space to fully unpack: The experience of identity loss after the death of a spouse. Not just grief in the emotional sense, but the deeper internal experience of no longer recognizing yourself inside your own life. We talk about why identity rupture is not separate from grief, but part of it. How identity is shaped in relationship. What happens when the relational system you were living inside suddenly disappears. And why the nervous system, roles, and sense of self all begin to shift at the same time. For many widows, this shows up as:  “I don’t know who I am anymore.”  “I don’t recognize myself.”  “A piece of me died when he did.” This episode is about slowing all of that down and naming what is actually happening beneath the surface — not to soften it, but to better understand it. Because when we can understand what’s happening inside of us, we can stop feeling so alone in it. Work With Me / Stay Connected If this resonated with you, I would love a "like," review, or share. All ways to extend the reach of my podcast to those who need to hear it.  Stay connected: Learn more about my grief support offerings  → [laurenlentz.com] Follow along for daily grief reflections Instagram: [@imsorrywerefriends]

    21 min

  5. APR 23

    Episode 30: The Quiet Ways Suffering Takes Root in Widowhood

    In this episode… I explore why suffering becomes such a common (and often misunderstood) part of widowhood and early grief and how it can quietly take root not just as pain, but as meaning, identity, and even connection. This is not about pathologizing grief or suggesting we “do it wrong.”  It’s about gently understanding what is actually happening beneath the surface of our experience. Because for many widows, suffering is not something we consciously choose, it is something the mind and body organize around in an attempt to make sense of profound loss. What we cover in this episode: 1. Why widowhood often feels like suffering How the loss of a spouse is not just emotional loss—but the loss of:  safety  identity  internal orientation  the life we organized ourselves around And why that creates an internal experience of disorientation that can feel like survival. 2. Why suffering can feel like connection We explore how:  the nervous system still seeks proximity after loss  pain can begin to feel like the only remaining link to the person who died  suffering can become unintentionally associated with love, devotion, and meaning And why that association is deeply human—not pathological. 3. The hidden rules that form in early grief How beliefs can quietly form such as:  “If I stop suffering, I am letting them go”  “If I feel okay, I am forgetting them”  “If I move forward, I am betraying what we had” And how these beliefs are not logical decisions, but emotional meanings formed in shock, love, and social pressure. 4. Pain vs. suffering (and why the distinction matters) We begin to separate: Pain: the raw reality of loss and longing Suffering: the story the mind creates about what that pain means And how that story can begin to shape identity, time, and the way we see our future. 5. Why suffering can feel like devotion How grief can blur into:  loyalty  love  devotion  emotional survival strategies And why “I hurt this much = I loved this much” becomes an internal equation many people unconsciously carry. 6. The deeper layer: identity after loss How grief is not only about missing someone—but also about:  missing who we were with them  losing access to versions of ourselves they brought forward  questioning who we are without that relational reflection And why these are identity-level disruptions, not just emotional ones. 7. Why this experience is not something you are doing wrong A grounding reminder that:  suffering is a human response to attachment loss  the mind is trying to organize the unorganizable  meaning-making is part of survival, not failure 8. A gentle reframe You don’t have to suffer to stay connected.  You don’t have to stay in pain to honor love. And noticing that possibility does not require change—only awareness. Closing reflection Nothing in this experience means you are broken, stuck, or grieving incorrectly. It means you loved someone in a way that shaped your entire internal world—and your mind and body are still trying to orient themselves after that loss. And over time, gently, you may begin to notice the difference between:  what hurts because it is love  and what hurts because it has become the only way you kn

    21 min

  6. APR 16

    Episode 29: When You May Look Okay… But You’re Not

    Episode Description: There’s a moment in grief when the outside world begins to respond to you differently. You’re getting out of bed. You’re showing up for your kids. You’re going to work, answering messages, maybe even laughing again. And from the outside… it can look like you’re “doing better.” But internally, it can feel like something completely different. In this episode, we explore the quiet, often unspoken tension between how grief looks… and how it actually feels. Because functioning isn’t the same as healing. And surviving isn’t the same as being okay. If you’ve ever felt unseen in your grief… misunderstood… or questioned whether your experience “matches” how you appear—this conversation is for you. What We Talk About:  The disconnect between external perception and internal experience in grief  Why others may see you as “strong” or “okay” before you feel that way  How functioning can be mistaken for healing  The emotional toll of feeling unseen or misunderstood  The nervous system’s role in adapting after loss  Guilt that can arise as you begin to re-engage with life  The “push and pull” (yo-yo) experience many widows face  Why moments of lightness do not reflect the depth of your love  How support can unintentionally fade as you appear more “okay” Key Reminders:  Just because you’re functioning doesn’t mean you’re okay  Your grief doesn’t have to match how it looks from the outside  You are allowed to feel both—moments of presence and deep pain  Your ability to keep going is not a betrayal of your person  This isn’t inconsistency—it’s grief Gentle Tools to Support You: Name the experience: “This is that space where the outside doesn’t match the inside.” Release the need to perform: You don’t have to meet others’ expectations or explain your grief. Be intentional with support: Seek out spaces where you feel seen without needing to translate your experience. Work With Me: If you’re looking for a space where you can be fully held in your grief—without pressure to rush, fix, or perform—I’d be honored to support you. You can explore 1:1 coaching or my group programs at, laurenlentz.com Connect & Continue the Conversation: If this episode resonated with you, I’d love to hear from you. You can reach out, share, or write a review.  Closing: You are someone learning how to live inside of loss… while still being asked to keep living. That is a lot to hold. Until next time… Big hugs, and lots of love.

    20 min

  7. APR 9

    Episode 28: If I Could Sit Beside The Version of Me That Was Newly Widowed… This Is What I Would Say

    In this deeply personal episode, I slow things down and return to the earliest version of myself: the one who had just lost Kevin, the one who didn’t know how she would survive. After sharing a post that resonated deeply within the widow community, I felt called to expand on those words… not just as reflections, but as lived experiences. This episode is an invitation to sit beside your own grief - gently, honestly, and without rushing. Together, we explore what it can actually feel like inside early loss… and what I would say now, with the perspective of time, to the version of me who was just beginning. In this episode, we talk about:  The physical reality of grief: when heartbreak feels like your body might not survive it  What’s happening when your nervous system goes into shock and survival mode The disorientation of losing not just your person… but your entire sense of self and future Why life can feel pointless, and how meaning begins to return  The deep loneliness of feeling misunderstood by others, and finding the right kind of support  The role of anger and rage in grief, and why they don’t need to be fixed  Navigating motherhood in grief and the fear of not being enough for your child The complicated relationship with love after loss - longing, guilt, fear, and possibility  Why joy can feel wrong at first, and how it slowly finds its way back  What it means to lean into grief, instead of running from it  Key reminders from this episode:  Your body is not failing you - it is responding to something overwhelming  You don’t have to figure out your life right now, just this moment  Not everyone will understand your grief and that’s okay  Some emotions don’t need to be fixed, they need to be honored  You are doing the best you can with what you have  Love does not leave your life - it changes form  Joy and grief can coexist  You don’t have to rush your healing For the woman in the early days: If everything feels shattered… If your body feels like it can’t hold what’s happening… If your mind is trying to make sense of something that makes no sense… You are not alone in this. You don’t have to have answers. You don’t have to know what comes next. Just stay. One breath. One moment. One step at a time. Mentioned in this episode:  “Grief is not an emergency, even though it feels that way.” – Marie-Claude GoudreauConnect with me: If this episode resonated with you, or you’re looking for support inside your grief journey:  Follow along on Instagram: @imsorrywerefriends Learn more about working together: laurenlentz.comLoved this episode? If this episode supported you in any way, I would be so grateful if you:  Shared it with another widow who may need it  Left a review  Or simply held a moment for yourself to acknowledge the strength it takes to keep going

    29 min

  8. APR 2

    Episode 27: When Grief Feels Like 10 Steps Forward… and 20 Steps Back

    In this episode of The Widow’s Collective Podcast, Lauren explores one of the most confusing and challenging aspects of grief: the feeling of taking steps forward only to be pulled back by unexpected waves of pain. If you’ve ever thought you were “healing” and then been hit with intense grief out of nowhere, this episode is for you. Lauren guides you through: The Moment It Hits – Recognizing the small triggers and unexpected waves that can bring grief rushing back. The Story We Tell Ourselves – How self-judgment can amplify grief and what it really means when we feel like we’re “regressing.” Grief Doesn’t Move in Straight Lines – Understanding the non-linear nature of grief and how waves of intensity are part of moving forward. Revisiting vs. Regression – Why revisiting old feelings doesn’t mean failure, and how to honor your progress. Why Grief Feels So Convincing – The physiological and emotional reasons grief hits hard, even after you’ve moved through earlier layers. The Reframe – Gentle questions and practices to respond to intense emotions with compassion rather than judgment. Progress in Grief – How to see progress in subtle, quiet ways rather than as a straight line. A Moment of Grounding – Practical exercises to pause, breathe, and reconnect with yourself when grief feels overwhelming. 💛 Key Takeaway: Grief isn’t a linear path, and every wave—gentle or fierce—is part of the process of moving forward. Feeling pulled back doesn’t erase your progress; it deepens your capacity to love, live, and carry your loss with presence and self-compassion. Whether you’re navigating daily grief, sudden triggers, or the ongoing tension of life after loss, this episode offers compassion, perspective, and practical guidance for moving forward—even when it feels like twenty steps back.

    23 min
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About

The Widow’s Collective is where grief meets hope, healing, and community. Hosted by grief coach and widow, Lauren Lentz, each episode offers tender reflections, real conversations, and practical tools to help you navigate life after loss. Whether you’re in the depths of early grief or learning to reimagine your life in the “after,” you’ll find a gentle space to land here — one that honors your story, your pace, and your humanity.

Information

  • Creator
    Lauren Lentz
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    34
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 The Widow's Collective
  • Show Website
    The Widow's Collective

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