The Dating Lab

Alyssa Dineen
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The Dating Lab is a podcast hosted by dating expert and profile stylist Alyssa Dineen, where modern dating gets a much-needed makeover. Through candid conversations with guests who’ve cracked the code, or are still figuring it out, Alyssa explores what it really takes to date with intention, clarity, and emotional safety. From profile rewrites to post-divorce success stories, The Dating Lab offers practical strategies, heartfelt stories, and a refreshing take on finding connection in today’s dating world.

Episodes

  1. 6D AGO

    Episode 8: Is Chemistry Real? Redefining Intimacy and Sexual Connection in Midlife

    In this enlightening episode, Alyssa Dineen is joined by Dr. Saida and Aaron Michael, the founders of Embodied Love University and experts in the science of intimacy. Together, they dismantle the common myths surrounding sexual chemistry and "the spark," especially as it pertains to midlife dating. Dr. Saida and Aaron share their decades of experience helping individuals and couples move beyond teenage fantasies of "instant" chemistry to build a more intentional, lasting magnetism. They explore the biological and hormonal factors that influence attraction, including how ovulation impacts receptivity, and discuss why a "peak experience" at the start of a relationship isn't always a sign of long-term compatibility. This conversation is a deep dive into how we can all live in a more connected way by understanding the difference between a fleeting hormonal rush and a deeply built charge. Alyssa and her guests also tackle sensitive topics like libido during menopause, the psychology behind erectile dysfunction, and why our later years can actually be our "power stage" for connection. You’ll also hear about:(01:42) The big question: Is sexual chemistry real or can it be intentionally built?(02:54) How trauma patterns, attachment styles, and hormonal cycles affect attraction(03:21) The fascinating study on how ovulation influences physical magnetism and receptivity(04:53) The secret to chemistry: Harnessing internal arousal rather than looking for external validation(08:00) Why labels like "sapiosexual" or "polyamorous" can sometimes limit our capacity for connection(12:19) Why following a strict "checklist" might make you miss the right person(15:40) The "Likability" Experiment: How judging others on apps vs. real life changes your energy(18:00) Is sexual incompatibility real, or is it a lack of skills and attunement?(23:30) Debunking libido myths: Menopause, testosterone, and the "power stage" of life(38:50) Navigating sensitive conversations around ED and performance anxiety in modern dating(44:00) The "Penetration Protocol" study and how couples can revolutionize their intimacy Rate, Review & Follow The Dating LabListen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. If this episode resonated, please rate, review, and share - it helps more people discover the show. Learn More About Dr. Saida and Aaron MichaelVisit Embodied Love UniversityListen to The Embodied Love Lounge...

    50 min

  2. JAN 21

    Episode 7: Style, Identity, and Reinvention: Alyssa Dineen Talks with Stacy London

    In this powerful and deeply reflective episode, Alyssa Dineen sits down with iconic stylist, designer, author, and midlife advocate Stacy London for a conversation about identity, confidence, aging, and the evolving meaning of personal style. Best known as the co-host of What Not to Wear, Stacy shares how her philosophy has shifted from prescribing fashion rules to helping people reconnect with their own agency and intuition. She opens up about the emotional impact of being judged publicly, the limitations of trend-driven fashion, and why clothes alone can never be the source of true confidence. Alyssa and Stacy explore the intersection of style, self-worth, and midlife transition, including menopause, women’s health, and why this life stage deserves more honesty and visibility. They discuss sustainable fashion, vintage shopping, overconsumption, and how building a wardrobe with intention can reflect who you are now—not who you used to be. This episode is an empowering reminder that style is not about fitting in or fixing yourself, but about trusting what makes you feel alive. You’ll also hear about:(01:00) Stacy’s evolution from What Not to Wear to personal empowerment(03:10) Why modern culture no longer needs traditional style “experts”(04:20) The difference between personal style and trends(05:45) Constructive criticism, judgment, and agency in fashion(07:00) The emotional impact of public scrutiny(08:15) Stepping away from the mirror and redefining confidence(10:00) Why clothes can’t be the foundation of self-esteem(11:20) What’s broken in the fashion industry today(12:45) Why women are underserved by fashion brands(14:30) Midlife style challenges and finding the middle ground(17:10) Why vintage shopping supports individuality(18:30) Favorite vintage and resale platforms(22:40) How to shop vintage with intention(25:00) Clothing swaps, resale, and circular fashion(27:00) Building a wardrobe with “character builder” pieces(28:55) Overconsumption and fashion’s environmental impact(31:30) Midlife transitions and living with more presence(33:00) Why Stacy closed State of Menopause(35:40) Menopause as a health and lifestyle issue(37:30) The business of menopause and women’s health(38:50) The emotional costs of...

    45 min

  3. JAN 7

    Episode 6: Modern Dating Myths and What Actually Works with Damona Hoffman

    Episode SummaryIn this insightful and grounded episode, Alyssa Dineen sits down with celebrity dating coach, media personality, and bestselling author Damona Hoffman to break down the biggest misconceptions in modern dating, and what actually leads to lasting connection. Damona shares how dating apps changed the landscape of relationships, why over-texting creates false intimacy, and how chasing instant chemistry can distract us from true compatibility. Drawing from years of coaching experience and her own love story, she explains why dating works best when treated as a process rather than a spark-driven guessing game. Alyssa and Damona also unpack outdated dating rules, shifting gender norms, and how communication breakdowns contribute to dating burnout. Together, they offer practical guidance for moving off the apps, setting realistic expectations, and building attraction over time, without losing yourself in the process. This episode is a refreshing reality check for anyone feeling confused, discouraged, or overwhelmed by modern dating. You’ll also hear about:(01:00) Damona’s background and how she became a dating coach(02:30) Translating personal branding principles into dating profiles(04:40) Why dating apps became essential, and who they actually serve(06:10) The communication crisis in modern dating(08:30) Dating burnout and the illusion of connection through texting(09:25) Why you can’t truly know someone through messages alone(11:20) The “one-to-one rule” and when to move off the apps(13:45) Phone calls vs. first dates as screening tools(15:15) Managing expectations and emotional energy in early dating(17:00) Letting go of outdated dating rules and gender roles(19:30) How relationships and marriage have evolved(20:30) Reciprocity over rigid roles in modern partnerships(23:25) Damona’s real-life dating experiment, and how she met her husband(27:00) Why dating should be treated as a process, not a vibe(30:00) Rethinking distance, flexibility, and logistics in dating(35:40) How dating needs change across different life stages(38:15) Questioning inherited stories about love and romance(39:05) Chemistry vs. compatibility, and why chemistry alone isn’t enough(40:50) The three-date rule and how attraction actually builds(44:15) Rom-com expectations vs. real-life...

    56 min

  4. 2025-12-03

    Episode 5: Reframing Dating Expectations and the Magic of Showing Up IRL: Alyssa Talks with Ali Jackson

    Episode SummaryIn this fun, honest, and incredibly relatable episode, Alyssa Dineen sits down with dating coach and creator of Finding Mr. Height, Ali Jackson, for a conversation about burnout, rebuilding joy in dating, and the surprising way she met her current partner through real-life events—not apps. Ali shares the story of how she unintentionally became a dating creator through her Close Friends list, the monotony of going on endless “okay but not great” dates, and the mindset shifts she used to keep going even when dating felt exhausting. Alyssa and Ali dive into the realities of modern dating: messaging fatigue, over-attaching to outcomes, relying too heavily on apps, and what happens when you finally decide to start showing up in-person again. They get into the full story of how Ali met her partner—including the event that changed everything, the 4AM bar moment, the “Skyline” nickname, and why taking initiative ended up being such a good thing. If you’re feeling drained by dating or unsure how to keep going, this episode is a reminder that connection can show up when—and where—you least expect it. You’ll also hear about:(01:50) How Ali’s Close Friends list accidentally turned into a dating community(03:50) Sharing more publicly during the pandemic and finding her voice(05:00) Experiencing dating burnout from endless “meh” dates(10:20) How to find excitement in dating without attaching to outcomes(12:30) The simple post-date question that changes everything(15:30) Why texting too long creates false chemistry(19:30) The moment Ali realized she needed to date differently(20:20) Her commitment to attending two in-person events a month(21:20) Viewing events as opportunities—not pressure-filled missions(23:00) The April event that set everything in motion(31:30) Staying out until 4AM and how “Skyline” got his nickname(33:15) Why Ali decided to ask him out first(35:00) Why finding love later made the relationship stronger(37:05) Embracing your “weird” as the best dating filter Rate, Review & Follow The Dating LabListen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or anywhere you get your podcasts. If you enjoyed this episode, please rate, review, and share—it helps others discover the show! Learn More About Ali JacksonFollow her on InstagramListen to the Finding Mr. Height podcastWork with Ali through her coaching programs Learn more about Alyssa Dineen:Visit Style My ProfileFollow Alyssa on Instagram Follow Alyssa on TikTok

    40 min

  5. 2025-11-05

    Episode 4: From Inner Glow to Outer Magnetism: Alyssa Dineen Talks with Carmindy

    In this radiant and deeply encouraging episode, Alyssa Dineen welcomes beauty expert, author, and What Not to Wear alum Carmindy for a conversation about confidence, energy, and attraction, on and off dating apps. Carmindy shares how her years in the beauty industry taught her that real magnetism comes from energy, not appearance. She opens up about navigating midlife dating, embracing authenticity, and how her “inner glow” philosophy transforms both self-image and relationships. Alyssa and Carmindy talk about the connection between self-worth and attraction, why showing up with confidence changes your dating outcomes, and how to shift from scarcity to abundance in love. They also dig into the realities of dating later in life, and how to stay open and joyful while doing it. This is a feel-good, empowering conversation that reminds listeners that beauty is energy, and the right person will always be drawn to your real glow. You’ll also hear about:(02:10) Carmindy’s evolution from TV makeup artist to confidence coach(05:45) Why true beauty starts with inner energy, not external polish(10:30) How your vibration and mindset shape your dating experience(14:20) The energetic shift that happens when you stop “trying too hard”(18:40) Dating over 40: letting go of fear and embracing new possibilities(23:55) Why confidence and joy are more magnetic than perfection(28:30) How to create a pre-date ritual that grounds and energizes you(33:50) Reframing rejection and detaching from outcomes(38:10) The connection between self-care, manifestation, and attraction(42:25) Carmindy’s advice for women reentering the dating scene(47:00) How to embody beauty from the inside out - and let love come to you Rate, Review, & Follow The Dating LabFind us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen. If this episode resonated with you, please leave a rating or review and share it with a friend - it really helps new listeners discover the show! Learn more about Carmindy Bowyer:Visit carmindy.comFollow Carmindy on Instagram Learn more about Alyssa Dineen:Visit Style My ProfileFollow Alyssa on InstagramFollow Alyssa on TikTok

    37 min

  6. 2025-10-01

    Episode 3: Love Isn’t at First Sight: 3 Marriages that Started With a So-So First Date

    In this peek behind the curtain, host Alyssa Dineen sits down with two of her own Style My Profile dating coaches, Max Nussenbaum and Katherine Paulsen. Max and Katherine get vulnerable, sharing the real, unvarnished stories of how they met their spouses on dating apps. They dismantle the myth of "love at first sight," revealing how their own "slow burn" relationships started with less-than-perfect first dates and grew into marriage. This conversation is packed with aha moments about recognizing a sustainable partner, trusting your gut, and why the "best first date ever" might actually be a red flag. Max and Katherine pivot from personal stories to professional advice, sharing the single most impactful tips they give clients for crafting authentic, effective dating profiles that attract the right person. You'll also hear about: (02:58) Max’s story of meeting his wife on Bumble and their journey to marriage.(08:08) Why a "too amazing" first date can be a red flag for future relationship success.(09:50) The crucial mindset shift: Separating what you're instantly attracted to from what makes a healthy, long-term partner.(11:05) The power of the slow burn: Max reveals his wife actively didn't like him on their first date.(20:22) Katherine’s experience of dating someone she was infatuated with versus the secure foundation she built with her husband.(25:26) The "Muted Version of Self": Why it can take up to five dates for someone's true, wonderful personality to emerge.(27:22) The ultimate question: How many dates should you go on before you call it quits?(31:39) How to have low-pressure "check-in" conversations in early dating to build trust and communication.(36:05) Pro Photo Tip: Use the majority of your photos to showcase personality, not just to prove you're attractive.(37:48) Pro Bio Tip: It's not what you say, it's how you say it—and how to find your authentic voice.(41:34) A game-changing hack: How looking at profiles of your own gender will instantly help you avoid clichés and write a better bio. This episode is for anyone feeling fatigued by modern dating, wondering if they’re doing it wrong, or ready to shift their mindset to find a lasting partnership. Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, or wherever you listen to podcasts! Learn more about Max and Katherine:Connect with Katherine on LinkedInConnect with Max on LinkedInLearn more about Katherine on her WebsiteLearn more about Max on his Website Learn more about Alyssa Dineen:Visit Style My ProfileFollow Alyssa on Instagram Follow Alyssa on TikTok

    50 min

  7. 2025-09-03

    Episode 2: Safety, Strategy, and Saying What You Want: Kate Anthony on Finding Love After Divorce

    In this heartfelt and honest episode, Alyssa Dineen sits down with author, podcaster, and dating success story Kate Anthony to talk about what it really takes to find love after a toxic relationship. After years of dating burnout and failed attempts, Kate found success using the Burned Haystack Dating Method, developed by Jennie Young, and guidance from Alyssa on profile clarity and preferences. Kate shares how she revamped her dating app experience by ditching “dealbreakers,” setting smart boundaries, and staying radically herself throughout the process. She opens up about meeting Ethan - her now-fiancé - and how intention, ease, and emotional safety shaped their relationship from the start. This is a powerful conversation for anyone healing from relationship trauma, redefining what safety and love look like, or ready to show up authentically in dating and life. You’ll also hear about:(01:55) Kate’s decision to try dating again after years of being single(06:00) How she revamped her profile with Alyssa’s help—and got “no notes”(10:40) Burned Haystack Dating and using preferences, not dealbreakers(14:10) Ethan’s pink shorts, bold values, and why his profile stood out(18:00) Early communication green flags and the importance of mutual effort(22:30) The first FaceTime, a direct ask, and scheduling their first date(27:00) Chemistry, ease, and the importance of feeling completely safe(31:40) Dating after narcissistic abuse and rebuilding self-trust(37:50) Co-parenting with an ex and healing over 16 years post-divorce(44:10) Emotional abuse, gaslighting, and how Kate finally got out(51:30) Advice for newly divorced women and reclaiming sexuality(56:20) Why dating is not theoretical—and how to show up to learn Whether you're navigating post-divorce life, dating as a parent, or learning to trust again, this episode is a powerful blueprint for clarity, resilience, and true connection. Rate, Review, & Follow The Dating LabFind us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen. If this episode resonated with you, please leave a rating or review and share it with a friend - it really helps new listeners discover the show! Learn more about Kate Anthony:Visit her Website Follow her on InstagramListen to The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast Learn more about Alyssa Dineen:Visit Style My ProfileFollow Alyssa on InstagramFollow Alyssa on TikTok

    42 min

  8. 2025-08-06

    Episode 1: The Burned Haystack Method: How to Date Smarter and Waste Less Time

    In this thought-provoking debut episode, Alyssa Dineen welcomes professor, dating methodologist, and founder of the Burned Haystack Dating Method, Dr. Jennie Young. What began as a personal quest to fix her own dating app experience quickly turned into a viral movement empowering thousands of women and non-binary people to reclaim their time, agency, and standards in dating. Jennie shares how her background in rhetoric and discourse shaped the creation of her method, why clarity and directness are game-changers in dating profiles, and what most success stories have in common. Alyssa and Jennie also unpack the current state of online dating - from gender divides to toxic patterns - and explore how choosing based on character over chemistry is transforming what makes someone truly dateable. This episode offers a powerful mindset shift and real-world tools for anyone navigating the chaos of modern dating. You’ll also hear about:(01:55) How Dr. Jennie Young used rhetorical analysis to decode dating apps(06:00) Why women are opting out of online dating—and what that means(10:40) Sexualization in dating apps and the rise of objectification(15:50) The five profile traits that lead to real matches(22:00) How to set boundaries that filter, not alienate matches(26:40) The culture shift toward choosing emotionally available “nice guys”(31:00) Why chemistry is not the best dating metric, and what to use instead(34:20) Dating profile red flags like height filters, vague clichés, and anger(38:40) Alyssa’s take on what truly matters when building connection This episode is for anyone who’s tired of swiping and ready to date with intention, intelligence, and real hope. Rate, Review, & Follow The Dating LabFind us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you tune in! If you love what you hear, leave a review - it really helps new listeners find us. Learn more about Jennie Young:Visit her WebsiteJoin the Burned Haystack Dating Method Facebook GroupRead more about Jenny’s work on Substack Learn more about Alyssa Dineen:Visit Style My ProfileFollow Alyssa on InstagramFollow Alyssa on TikTok

    42 min
  • 8 Episodes

About

The Dating Lab is a podcast hosted by dating expert and profile stylist Alyssa Dineen, where modern dating gets a much-needed makeover. Through candid conversations with guests who’ve cracked the code, or are still figuring it out, Alyssa explores what it really takes to date with intention, clarity, and emotional safety. From profile rewrites to post-divorce success stories, The Dating Lab offers practical strategies, heartfelt stories, and a refreshing take on finding connection in today’s dating world.

Information

  • Creator
    Alyssa Dineen
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    8
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2026 Alyssa Dineen
  • Show Website
    The Dating Lab

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