57 episodes

A podcast where two non-believers read through the Bible but aren't, you know, jerks about it. Join comics writers Benito Cereno and Chris Sims as they journey through the Good Book from Acts to Zephaniah, with stops in the Apocrypha along the way.

Apocrypals Benito and Chris

    • Comedy

A podcast where two non-believers read through the Bible but aren't, you know, jerks about it. Join comics writers Benito Cereno and Chris Sims as they journey through the Good Book from Acts to Zephaniah, with stops in the Apocrypha along the way.

    56: Welcome to the Bone Zone (The Book of Ezekiel, Part Two)

    56: Welcome to the Bone Zone (The Book of Ezekiel, Part Two)

    Welcome back, Theophiloi, to the truly disconcerting rantings of the hair-throwing, scroll-eating mad lad himself, Ezekiel! In this episode, we go to extremes, as Ezekiel offers up the most brütal horror movie prophecies for the iniquitous nations, and then takes a hard right turn into intensely specific blueprints for his visionary construction project. If you've ever wanted to know how prophets make their money, this is the episode that reveals all.

    • 1 hr 8 min
    55: The Parable of the Sexy Blood Baby (The Book of Ezekiel, Part One)

    55: The Parable of the Sexy Blood Baby (The Book of Ezekiel, Part One)

    Let me ask you a question, Theophiloi: why prophets so nasty? In this episode, we put our treasured No Cusses rule in the greatest danger as we dive into the violent and upsettingly horny visions of Ezekiel, last of the major prophets. This absolute scroll-eating mad lad has a whole list of unsavory activities and breads that he wants to tell you about in detail. Don't listen to this one with your mom.

    • 1 hr 34 min
    54: Our Favorite Murders (The Infancy Gospel of Thomas)

    54: Our Favorite Murders (The Infancy Gospel of Thomas)

    Merry Christmas, Theophiloi! It's the most wonderful time of the year, where we gather to celebrate the birth of Jesus, which subsequently led to several horrible crimes that terrorized his hometown for years. Plus: our actual last-minute holiday gift guide!

    • 1 hr 30 min
    53: Maccabees 3: Elephant Drift (The Third Book of Maccabees)

    53: Maccabees 3: Elephant Drift (The Third Book of Maccabees)

    Happy Hanukkah, Theophiloi, and welcome back to the action-packed saga of the Dynasty of God's Resisters! Ptolemy (not that one, the one who loves daddy) is causing some trouble in Alexandria, and by trouble, we mean a mass execution via 500 drunk elephants. This book rules. Plus: our hopefully not offensive suggestions for new Hanukkah traditions! Will Judith bring you a fancy pen on her way to her next beheading? We hope so!

    • 1 hr 1 min
    51: Apocrypals Chris And Benito (The Book of Ecclesiastes)

    51: Apocrypals Chris And Benito (The Book of Ecclesiastes)

    CONTENT WARNING: This week's book deals with some pretty depressing ideas, which leads us to discuss depression and, briefly, suicide.

    Absolute futility, Theophiloi. That's what we're dealing with this week as we dive into the dark horse candidate for our favorite book of Bible so far: Solomon/Koholet's extremely grim treatise on depression and why the living should envy the dead. It's a lot more lighthearted than it sounds, we promise. Plus: the Bible verse probably written by a horrible goose.

    • 1 hr 33 min
    51: Jesus, Buffy (Halloween Chick Tracts)

    51: Jesus, Buffy (Halloween Chick Tracts)

    It's the spookiest day of the year, TheAWFULoi, and your humble Sons of ThUNDEAD are back at it with a deep dive into our least canonical selection: the evangelizing comic book tracts of Jack T. Chick. Join us as we discuss the dubious, hateful, and distressingly widely read stories that are designed to drag you kicking and screaming into a very specific version of salvation on this, the Devil's Birthday. Haw haw haw!

    • 1 hr 33 min

Customer Reviews

Velvet Crocodile ,

A superb, intelligent, fascinating podcast

And they aren’t, yunno, jerks about it.

Aaron Tunney ,

All of the bits of the bible that your vicar refused to teach

Featuring:

- Wizard battles
- Wrestling matches
- A 12-foot tall saint
- Man-eating seals

… and much more.

medieval images ,

Apocrypals

Love this podcast. Often makes me giggle along with the presenters and I really like the way the bible is questioned objectively, but respectfully

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