The Conscious Love Show

Shane Kohler
  • 5.0 (6)
  • Relationships
  • Updated weekly

Most relationship advice will tell you what to do differently. This show will tell you why you keep doing what you do — and what it's actually costing you. Every week Shane Kohler brings direct, unfiltered insight into the psychology of love, attraction, and commitment. No validation. No generic advice. Just honest conversations about the unconscious patterns driving your relationships and what it actually takes to change them. This isn't a show about finding the right person. It's about becoming someone who can recognize them, choose them, and build something real with them. New episodes every week. Take the Relational Blueprint Quiz at inspiredloveapproach.com/blueprint to find out which pattern has been quietly running your love life.

  1. 1 hr ago

    The Real Reason He Keeps Coming Back But Never Commits

    To take the Quiz and discover your Relational Blueprint, click here. To book a private session with Shane, click here. Please send all questions for next month's Q&A episode to info@thelivingrelationship.com   This week's episode is a Q&A, built around three listener questions that all circle the same painful, familiar territory: trying to read a man who won't give you a straight answer. The first question comes from a woman navigating a six-year, on-and-off connection with a man who disappears for months at a time, then resurfaces with an intense day or two before vanishing again — leaving her wondering whether he's genuinely interested or simply enjoys the attention when it's convenient. The second comes from a 47-year-old woman who recognizes she's stuck in an old, anxious pattern — one where she gives her power away and accepts far less than she actually wants, currently playing out in a relationship with a man unwilling to commit. The third comes from a woman who keeps encountering the same frustrating pattern in dating: men pursue her hard in the beginning, only to pull back a few months in, concluding they don't see a future — leaving her questioning what she might be doing wrong, even though nothing about her has changed. Shane breaks down what's really happening beneath each of these situations — the difference between chemistry and commitment, why inconsistency so often gets mistaken for depth, and how to stop trying to decode a man's behavior and start trusting what it's already telling you.

  2. 22 Jul

    How Not to Be A Doormat with Erin and Sara Foster

    Click here to take the quiz and discover your Relational Blueprint   I met with Erin and Sarah Foster — the real-life sisters behind Netflix's Nobody Wants This — for a wide-ranging conversation on the most potent relationship challenges we all face and a powerful breakdown of my Relational Blueprint system. Listen to the full episode. Click below to listen on Apple or Spotify or search for The World's First Podcast on any major platform and look for the episode "How Not To Be a Doormat" Listen on Apple Podcasts Listen on Spotify

  3. 15 Jul

    What Men Notice About a Woman Before She Even Says a Word

    Take the Blueprint Quiz here to discover your Relational Blueprint and get your personalized breakdown.   There's a version of dating advice that tells you exactly what to say, when to say it, and how to say it. And there's a reason none of it works. Because what he's responding to has almost nothing to do with your words. Before you've finished your first sentence he's already picked up something about you that no script can manufacture and no strategy can fake. And that something determines everything — whether he leans in or pulls back, whether he takes you seriously or keeps things casual, whether he sees a future or just a moment. This episode is about what he's actually reading. And more importantly — what you can do about it.

  4. 8 Jul

    If He's Not Afraid of Commitment, Why Her and Not You

    You watched him leave. And then you watched him move on — faster than you expected, happier than you thought he'd be, with someone who seems to be everything you thought you were supposed to be to him. And the question that's been living in the back of your mind ever since is a simple one. Why her and not me. This episode is designed to answer that question. Because the relationship came into your life for a reason. When you really understand what that reason is, everything else that happened will make sense too.

  5. 1 Jul

    If You Act Like His Wife, He'll Treat You Like His Mother

    Click here to take the quiz and discover your Relational Blueprint This is for the woman who does everything right. You show up for him, you take care of him, you make sure his life runs smoothly. You make yourself as valuable and indispensable as a person can be. And somehow — it's still not working. He's not stepping up. He's not choosing you the way you need to be chosen. The relationship feels less like a partnership and more like a job. And when it's all said and done, he leaves you anyway. This episode is about the hidden motivation underneath you efforts that silently sabotages your connection and kills the sexual polarity in the relationship. By the end of this episode, you'll understand what your nervous system has been doing in your relationships without your permission — and why the thing that feels most like love to you has been quietly working against everything you actually want.

  6. 24 Jun

    How to Heal the Need to Have Him Choose You

    There's something that no amount of success, self work, or self love content seems to touch. And most women know exactly what it is even if they've never said it out loud. It's the feeling that until a man chooses her — really chooses her — something is still missing. Something is still unresolved. And she's been carrying that feeling for a long time. This episode is about where that comes from. And more importantly — what it actually takes to heal it. Hit play. And when you're done, click here to find out which Relational Blueprint has been quietly running your love life.

  7. 17 Jun

    The #1 Reason Men Leave (And the Thing That Makes Him Stay)

    Click here to take the Quiz and discover your Relational Blueprint Send questions to info@thelivingrelationship.com Men don't leave because they stop loving you. He may have left loving you completely. And if you've never understood how that's possible — this episode is going to change the way you see every relationship you've ever been in. Most men can't explain why they leave. There's something happening in their nervous system that they're responding to without the language to name it. Today I'm going to name it for them — and for you — in a way that you've probably never heard before.

  8. 10 Jun

    Four Months In and He Still Hasn't Told You What He Wants — Do This

    Click here to take the Quiz and Discover Your Relational Blueprint Send Questions for July's Q&A Episode to info@thelivingrelationship.com Every month I set aside an episode to answer your questions directly — the ones you're sitting with, the ones you're afraid to say out loud, and the ones you've been searching for a real answer to. No scripts, no theory for the sake of theory. Just honest, direct responses to what you're actually going through. If you have a question you'd like answered on a future episode, send it to info@thelivingrelationship.com. Your question could be featured next month. This month's questions:   "I've been seeing this guy for about four months now and honestly everything feels really good when we're together. But we've never actually defined what we are and every time I get close to bringing it up I just... don't. I'm scared of ruining what we have. How do I know when it's actually time to say something?"     "I've always been someone who shows love by taking care of people. Cooking for them, checking in, being there no matter what. But I've had multiple people tell me that's why men walk all over me. The thing is it doesn't feel like a problem to me, it feels like love. How do I change something that feels so natural without just becoming someone I'm not?"     "My ex told me I was too much. Too emotional, too intense, too needy. And it really messed with me because I wasn't trying to be any of those things, I was just being honest about how I felt. Now I'm in something new and I'm constantly monitoring myself so I don't overwhelm him. How do I just be myself without scaring people away?"     "How do you know when you're being patient and supportive versus just making excuses for someone? I feel like I'm always giving people the benefit of the doubt and I don't know if that's a strength or if I'm just afraid to admit when something isn't working."

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5
out of 5
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About

Most relationship advice will tell you what to do differently. This show will tell you why you keep doing what you do — and what it's actually costing you. Every week Shane Kohler brings direct, unfiltered insight into the psychology of love, attraction, and commitment. No validation. No generic advice. Just honest conversations about the unconscious patterns driving your relationships and what it actually takes to change them. This isn't a show about finding the right person. It's about becoming someone who can recognize them, choose them, and build something real with them. New episodes every week. Take the Relational Blueprint Quiz at inspiredloveapproach.com/blueprint to find out which pattern has been quietly running your love life.

Information

  • Creator
    Shane Kohler
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2026
  • Episodes
    100
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2022 All rights reserved.
  • Show Website
    The Conscious Love Show

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