UNDERSTANDABLE

Robert Siegers
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated weekly

► Hi, my name is Robert! For a long time, I wondered why relationships felt so much harder for me than for others. Over the past years, I had the privilege of spending thousands of dollars and countless hours working with four different therapists, exploring what actually creates emotional safety ► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions. I am not a health professional. My content is based on research & my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for 3 years.

  1. 1 day ago

    Actual Avoidant Explains Why Avoidants Never Fight For a Relationship

    ► Build secure relationships without losing yourself: https://understandable.net (ad) Welcome to today's episode! In this very personal video I share with you why avoidants never fight for a relationship. ► Links and Resources: Deactivation Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fi-wUf36e9k&t=1s ► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform! YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠ Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6 Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905 Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠ ► Episode Timestamps: 00:00 Introduction 02:32 Flaw Finding Mechanism 06:11 Unrealistic Relationship Expectations 10:19 Overwhelmed by Closeness 13:22 Internal Emotional Withdrawal 19:16 Lack of Relationship Skills 20:43 Defiance and Protection 23:16 How to Respond ► Reach Out To Me :) E-Mail: info@understandable.net ► Hi, my name is Robert! I make videos about how to build stable, secure relationships without losing yourself or waiting forever for the “perfect” partner. :) ► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education. I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

  2. 3 days ago

    Why (Almost) All Avoidants Come Back After No Contact

    ► Build secure relationships without losing yourself: https://understandable.net (ad) Welcome to today's episode! In this video I talk about why almost all avoidants come back after no contact. And why emotionally unavailable people are so addicted to no contact! ► Links and Resources: Why No Contact Doesn’t Work Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9xqR6zfBIk The Moment I Decided to Change Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NkVmvMkZUI4 ► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform! YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠ Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6 Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905 Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠ ► Episode Timestamps: 00:00 Introduction 01:59 Understanding No Contact 05:02 The Magic Effect 09:39 Two Avoidant Groups 13:35 Responding to Returns 16:54 Breaking the Cycle 20:38 Conclusion ► Reach Out To Me :) E-Mail: info@understandable.net ► Hi, my name is Robert! I make videos about how to build stable, secure relationships without losing yourself or waiting forever for the “perfect” partner. :) ► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education. I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

  3. 5 days ago

    What Your Avoidant Ex Secretly Wants During No Contact

    ► Build secure relationships without losing yourself: https://understandable.net (ad)Welcome to today's episode! In this video I share from my own avoidant's perspective what your avoidant ex secretly wants during no contact.► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform! YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠ Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6 Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905 Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠ ► Episode Timestamps:00:00 Introduction01:55 1. Desire for Reconnection04:49 2. Testing Availability06:53 3. Fighting for Them09:36 4. Explaining What Went Wrong10:58 5. Desire for Independence12:56 6. Seeking Emotional Calm15:15 7. The Need for Acceptance17:40 Focusing on Your Growth► Reach Out To Me :)E-Mail: info@understandable.net► Hi, my name is Robert! I make videos about how to build stable, secure relationships without losing yourself or waiting forever for the “perfect” partner. :)► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

  4. 9 Aug

    The Exact Moment Avoidants Realize You're Not Coming Back

    ► Build secure relationships without losing yourself: https://understandable.net (ad) Welcome to today's episode! In this video I describe the exact moment when avoidants realize you're not coming back. And I reflect on how to move on with more ease. ► Links and Resources: The Stages of an Avoidant Coming Back Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVuzwMjflyk&t=1s The Moment I Decided to Change Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NkVmvMkZUI4&t=1s ► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform! YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠ Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6 Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905 Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠ ► Episode Timestamps: 00:00 Introduction 01:42 Relationship Dynamics 05:45 The Breakup Experience 09:28 No Contact Phase 11:53 The Avoidant's Internal Model 16:29 Moment of Realization 21:46 Moving On and Boundaries 24:55 Strengthening Your Self-Worth ► Reach Out To Me :) E-Mail: info@understandable.net ► Hi, my name is Robert! I make videos about how to build stable, secure relationships without losing yourself or waiting forever for the “perfect” partner. :) ► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education. I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

  5. 7 Aug

    Avoidant Shutdown: Why Avoidants Suddenly Go Cold (Explained by Actual Avoidant)

    ► Build secure relationships without losing yourself: https://understandable.net (ad) Welcome to today's episode! This one is a personal one. I talk about why avoidants suddenly shut down and go cold. How does it feel like? Why there is no other option left? This one may be truly eye opening. ;-) ► Links and Resources: Polyvagal Theory Video: https://youtu.be/2iT8Msp8Vx0?si=94Sh2XeLyY0nFp9P Gerald Hüther: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gerald_H%C3%BCther ► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform! YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠ Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6 Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905 Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠ ► Episode Timestamps: 00:00 Understanding Avoidant Shutdown 02:30 The Shutdown Experience from the Inside 07:32 Roots of the Shutdown 10:12 The Three Closed Doors 17:48 Shame and Nervous System 18:43 How Avoidants Can Change 20:25 Supporting Your Partner ► Reach Out To Me :) E-Mail: info@understandable.net ► Hi, my name is Robert! I make videos about how to build stable, secure relationships without losing yourself or waiting forever for the “perfect” partner. :) ► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education. I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

  6. 5 Aug

    Why The Initiator of a Breakup Always Comes Back (Confessions of a Dumper)

    ► Build secure relationships without losing yourself: https://understandable.net (ad) Welcome to today's episode! In this video I talk about why the initiator of a breakup always comes back and when reconnection makes sense. ► Links and Resources:Limerence Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmNjDwdPwOA&t=2s ► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform! YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠ Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6 Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905 Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠ ► Episode Timestamps: 00:00 Why Exes Return 01:58 1. Insecurely Attached Breakup Initiators 03:50 2. Needy Exes 07:42 3. Self-Aware Breakup Initiators 10:01 Don't Fix Them 12:15 Evaluating Their Intentions 13:25 Building Self-Worth ► Reach Out To Me :) E-Mail: info@understandable.net ► Hi, my name is Robert! I make videos about how to build stable, secure relationships without losing yourself or waiting forever for the “perfect” partner. :) ► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

  7. 2 Aug

    What Avoidants Would Say If They Were Actually Honest (Confessions by a Healed Avoidant)

    ► Build secure relationships without losing yourself: https://understandable.net (ad) Welcome to today's episode! In this video I share with brutal honesty, what avoidant would say in a dating phase or relationship, if they were actually honest. ► Links and Resources: The Moment I Decided to Change Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NkVmvMkZUI4&t=1s ► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform! YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠ Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6 Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905 Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠ ► Episode Timestamps: 00:00 Introduction to Avoidant Honesty 01:46 Understanding the Avoidant Mind 02:25 The Dating Phase Illusion 06:05 Relationship Conflict and Avoidance 08:30 The Breakup and Regret Cycle 15:10 Hitting Rock Bottom 19:52 Ideas for Partners ► Reach Out To Me :) E-Mail: info@understandable.net ► Hi, my name is Robert! I make videos about how to build stable, secure relationships without losing yourself or waiting forever for the “perfect” partner. :) ► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education. I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

  8. 31 Jul

    Why the Bedroom Exposes Avoidant Attachment (99% of the Time)

    ► Build secure relationships without losing yourself: https://understandable.net (ad)Welcome to today's episode! In this video I get vulnerable and share with you how avoidant attachment shows up in the bedroom.► Links and Resources:Avoidant Attachment Darkest Coping Mechanism Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLyK-Yi1QpE► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform! YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠ Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6 Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905 Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠ ► Episode Timestamps:00:00 Introduction02:38 Childhood Origins06:08 The Dating Phase07:14 The Rollercoaster Phase09:44 The Mechanical Phase13:03 The Drought Period16:02 Solutions and Healing20:03 Setting Boundaries► Reach Out To Me :)E-Mail: info@understandable.net► Hi, my name is Robert! I make videos about how to build stable, secure relationships without losing yourself or waiting forever for the “perfect” partner. :)► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

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About

► Hi, my name is Robert! For a long time, I wondered why relationships felt so much harder for me than for others. Over the past years, I had the privilege of spending thousands of dollars and countless hours working with four different therapists, exploring what actually creates emotional safety ► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions. I am not a health professional. My content is based on research & my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for 3 years.

Information

  • Creator
    Robert Siegers
  • Years Active
    2018 - 2026
  • Episodes
    402
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Robert Siegers
  • Show Website
    UNDERSTANDABLE

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