What Fresh Hell: Parenting, Relationships, and Making Life Better, with Two Funny Moms

Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson

When you're a parent, every day brings a "fresh hell" to deal with. In other words, there's always something. Think of us as your funny mom friends who are here to remind you: you're not alone, and it won't always be this hard. We're Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables, both busy moms of three kids, but with completely different parenting styles. Margaret is a laid-back to the max; Amy never met a spreadsheet or an organizational system she didn't like. In each episode of "What Fresh Hell" we offer lots of laughs, but also practical advice, parenting strategies, and tips to empower you in your role as a mom. We explore self-help techniques, as well as ways to prioritize your own needs, combat stress, and despite the invisible workload we all deal with, find joy amidst the chaos of motherhood. If you've ever wondered "why is my kid..." then one of us has probably been there, and we're here to tell you what we've learned along the way. We unpack the behaviors and developmental stages of toddlers, tweens, and teenagers, providing insights into their actions and equipping you with effective parenting strategies. We offer our best parenting tips and skills we've learned. We debate the techniques and studies that are everywhere for parents these days, and get to the bottom of what works best to raise happy, healthy, fairly well-behaved kids, while fostering a positive parent-child relationship. If you're the default parent in your household, whether you're a busy mom juggling multiple pickups and dropoffs, or a first-time parent seeking guidance, this podcast is your trusted resource. Join our community of supportive mom friends laughing in the face of motherhood!   whatfreshhellpodcast.com

  1. 1d ago

    Fresh Take: Suzanne Garfinkle-Crowell on "Therapy Speak" and Adolescent Mental Health

    When a teen says she's having panic attacks, or believes she has OCD, parents tend to react by either minimizing and dismissal, or by having their own panic attacks. Adolescent psychiatrist Suzanne Garfinkle-Crowell, author of book GIRLHOOD TRANSLATED, believes there is a more nuanced way to understand the growing role of "therapy speak" and self-diagnosis in teenagers' lives (particularly girls) In this interview, Dr. Garfinkle-Crowell explains: How greater mental health awareness has meant destigmatization but also some casual over-identification Why adolescents are particularly vulnerable the influence of mental health content they see on TikTok or Instagram How a self-diagnosis can function both as validation of a teen's feelings and a way to protect themselves from having to discuss those feelings further (the label as the be-all and end-all) How to "translate" the therapy speak your teenager might be using in order to have more productive conversations about their mental health Here's where you can find Dr. Garfinkle-Crowell and her work: www.suzannegarfinklecrowellmd.com Buy GIRLHOOD TRANSLATED: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9798217085736 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Fresh Take: Suzanne Garfinkle-Crowell on "Therapy Speak" and Adolescent Mental Health
  2. 3d ago

    Who Are We "Performing" For?

    It can feel like we're always performing in our daily lives—playing the role of the calm parent, the careful listener, the super-healthy jogger. We have a sense of being watched, and maybe judged as well, and we alter what we're doing in awareness of that imaginary audience. But who's actually watching? And how would we do things differently if we stopped caring whether anyone noticed our behavior and had any thoughts about it whatsoever? In this episode we explore the pressure to perform the many roles women are expected to play, and why motherhood can make that pressure especially intense. We discuss: How social expectations shape our behavior The pressure we feel to appear patient, organized, and completely in control Why parenting with an audience can make everyday situations even more stressful Why our kids benefit from seeing us model imperfection, vulnerability, and repair Why asking for help and saying 'no' can be acts of authenticity Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Our episode "Parenting with an Audience" Alicia P Melis for the New York Academy of Sciences. The evolutionary roots of human collaboration: coordination and sharing of resources Loes Meeussen and Colette Van Laar for Frontiers in Psychology Journal. Feeling Pressure to Be a Perfect Mother Relates to Parental Burnout and Career Ambitions. American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry: Lying and Children What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Who Are We "Performing" For?
  3. Nov 4

    How to Do a Reset When Your Household Has Gone Off the Rails

    When family routines fall apart, it can feel overwhelming to attempt a reset. But getting things "back to one" is possible. In this episode, we answer a listener’s question about how to get routines and household expectations back to normal after a chaotic stretch. We discuss: Why family systems can break down gradually or all at once The questions to ask yourself before actually trying to fix anything How clear expectations when things are calm can make it easier to know what you're returning to How to respond to the pushback you will probably encounter Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Sege, R. D., and Siegel, B. S. for Pediatrics: Effective Discipline to Raise Healthy Children CDC's Essential Tips for Parenting Toddlers and Preschoolers: Tips for Relying on Routines and Rules CDC's Essential Tips for Parenting Toddlers and Preschoolers: Tips for Responding to Behavior Harvard University Center on the Developing Child: A Guide to Executive Function Amy Sutherland for the NYT: What Shamu Taught Me About a Happy Marriage Our episode Creating Systems That Work Our episode How to Make the Back-to-School Transition a Little Easier Our episode When Kids Hate Transitions What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    How to Do a Reset When Your Household Has Gone Off the Rails
  4. Nov 2

    Deep Dive: Does Having Kids Ruin Your Marriage Forever?

    This Deep Dive series revisits some of our previous episodes about dynamics with our parenting partners. Have you and your spouse slipped into "angry partners at the 24/7 daycare" mode since your baby was born? Here's why relationships change after kids, and some real solutions that can help us get through it. Amy and Margaret discuss: The number-one reason relationships change after a baby is born Helpful perspectives for maintaining sanity during early parenthood Small steps for building back connection with your partner Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Jessica Grose for the NYT: ⁠Fighting Constantly after Baby? Read This⁠ Doss BD, et al. ⁠The Effect of the Transition to Parenthood on Relationship Quality: An Eight-Year Prospective Study⁠. Alex Vance for Verywell Family: ⁠4 Ways To Focus On Your Relationship When the Kids Keep You Busy⁠ Jessica Grose for the NYT: ⁠Bickering More After Kids? Learn how to avoid the four horsemen of the relationship apocalypse.⁠ Christina Caron for the NYT: ⁠How to Reconnect with Your Partner After Kids⁠ ⁠Judd Apatow: "Who Slept Worse?"⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Deep Dive: Does Having Kids Ruin Your Marriage Forever?
  5. Oct 28

    Weaponized Incompetence—and Weaponized Passivity

    There are several sneaky ways for the people we work with, or live with, to get away with participating less in the work that needs to happen. "Weaponized incompetence" became TikTok-famous during the pandemic, and most of us became more aware when that was being deployed. A recent Substack post by Ask Astrid suggested that "weaponized passivity" may be a subtler but equally effective opt-out option. When someone says "I don't care what we have for dinner, I'll eat whatever," are they being generous, low-key, and collaborative? Or are they declaring themselves "not it," knowing dinner will still be served (by you) and they'll still get to eat? We discuss: How to spot weaponized incompetence, weaponized passivity, and weaponized irritability How gender roles and socialization teach women to anticipate the needs of the domestic sphere, while rewarding men for being hands-off and largely inattentive Practical ways to challenge these patterns, including recognizing that “not caring” doesn't mean something doesn't need to get done How these dynamics show up with our kids, our teenagers... and yes, sometimes, ourselves We loved Ask Astrid's Substack on this topic and refer to it heavily in this episode. Read for yourself: Meet weaponized passivity: incompetence's quieter sibling Here are links to some of the other resources mentioned in the episode: Maggie Zhou for Refinery29: Why Is ‘Weaponized Incompetence’ Blowing Up On TikTok? Because Too Many Of Us Do It Fresh Take: Allison Daminger, WHAT'S ON HER MIND- The Mental Workload of Family Life Changing the Invisible Workload (with guest Eve Rodsky) Celestial Sylvia on FB: Weaponized incompetence in "You Can See Everything" What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Weaponized Incompetence—and Weaponized Passivity
4.8
out of 5
1,014 Ratings

About

When you're a parent, every day brings a "fresh hell" to deal with. In other words, there's always something. Think of us as your funny mom friends who are here to remind you: you're not alone, and it won't always be this hard. We're Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables, both busy moms of three kids, but with completely different parenting styles. Margaret is a laid-back to the max; Amy never met a spreadsheet or an organizational system she didn't like. In each episode of "What Fresh Hell" we offer lots of laughs, but also practical advice, parenting strategies, and tips to empower you in your role as a mom. We explore self-help techniques, as well as ways to prioritize your own needs, combat stress, and despite the invisible workload we all deal with, find joy amidst the chaos of motherhood. If you've ever wondered "why is my kid..." then one of us has probably been there, and we're here to tell you what we've learned along the way. We unpack the behaviors and developmental stages of toddlers, tweens, and teenagers, providing insights into their actions and equipping you with effective parenting strategies. We offer our best parenting tips and skills we've learned. We debate the techniques and studies that are everywhere for parents these days, and get to the bottom of what works best to raise happy, healthy, fairly well-behaved kids, while fostering a positive parent-child relationship. If you're the default parent in your household, whether you're a busy mom juggling multiple pickups and dropoffs, or a first-time parent seeking guidance, this podcast is your trusted resource. Join our community of supportive mom friends laughing in the face of motherhood!   whatfreshhellpodcast.com

You Might Also Like