Raising Boys & Girls

Welcome to the Raising Boys and Girls Podcast with Sissy Goff, David Thomas, and Melissa Trevathan. In each episode of this podcast, we’ll share some of what we’re learning in the work we do with kids and families on a daily basis at Daystar Counseling Ministries. Our goal is to help you care for the kids in your life with a little more understanding, a little more practical help, and a whole lot of hope. So pull up a chair and join us on this journey of raising boys and girls. Connect with us at raisingboysandgirls.com.

  1. Episode 377: The Power of Family and Staying Connected Through Adulthood with Dr. Kathy Koch

    2D AGO

    Episode 377: The Power of Family and Staying Connected Through Adulthood with Dr. Kathy Koch

    Dr. Kathy Koch joins Sissy Goff and David Thomas to discuss the growing challenges facing today’s young adults and families, especially around resilience, identity, technology, and relationships between parents and adult children. Dr. Kathy explains how overparenting, screen dependence, fear of failure, and endless choices have contributed to anxiety, lack of perseverance, and “failure to launch” struggles, while also offering hope through intentional connection, healthy boundaries, faith, and small relational repairs. She encourages parents to stop leading from guilt, help kids practice making decisions and asking for help, create healthier technology rhythms, and focus on rebuilding trust and communication one step at a time. Resources mentioned: Celebrate Kids Resolve Conflict and Find Peace and Hope with Adult Children: Strategies and Conversations that Work by Dr. Kathy Koch Five to Thrive: How to Determine If Your Core Needs Are Being Met (and What to Do When They're Not) by Dr. Kathy Koch Resilient Kids: Raising Them to Embrace Life with Confidence by Dr. Kathy Koch 8 Great Smarts: Discover and Nurture Your Child's Intelligences by Dr. Kathy Koch Summit Ministries Impact 360 Institute . . . . . .  Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Pre-order our new book, Capable and grab tickets for Capable - The Book Tour here! See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .  If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form. QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply. SHOPIFY: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGShopify to learn more about Shopify! LEGACY BOX: Legacybox is running their Mother’s Day sale and they’re also offering an additional $10 off your order. Visit Legacybox.com and use discount code: RBG GO MINNO: Visit GoMinno.com to get a one month FREE TRIAL using code: RBG WAYFAIR: Get organized, refreshed, and ready for the holidays for way less. Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. CASPER: Save up to 30% on mattresses and up to 35% on everything else when you go to casper.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    37 min
  2. Episode 376: Helping Teenagers and Young Adults Find Their True Identity and Capabilities with Alena Pitts Franklin

    4D AGO

    Episode 376: Helping Teenagers and Young Adults Find Their True Identity and Capabilities with Alena Pitts Franklin

    In this episode, Alena Pitts Franklin shares how grief, faith, and family shaped her understanding of capability and identity. She reflects on her early acting role in War Room, the loss of her mother Winter Pitts, and how God’s steadiness carried her through seasons of fear, insecurity, and growth. Throughout the episode, Alena encourages parents to lead with peace, encouragement, and authentic faith rather than fear, while reminding girls that their identity is rooted in God’s love instead of culture, achievement, or comparison. She also discusses her new book God Is, her ongoing work with For Girls Like You Ministries, and her passion for helping girls discover confidence, purpose, and resilience through a relationship with God. Resources mentioned: War Room God Is ― A Devotional for Teen Girls & Young Women: 60 Days of Learning Who God Is to Understand Who We Are by Alena Franklin and Priscilla Shirer For Girls Like You Ministries  All Eyes on Lena Box Set by Alena Pitts and Wynter Pitts . . . . . .  Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Pre-order our new book, Capable and grab tickets for Capable - The Book Tour here! See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .  If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form. QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply. SHOPIFY: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGShopify to learn more about Shopify! LEGACY BOX: Legacybox is running their Mother’s Day sale and they’re also offering an additional $10 off your order. Visit Legacybox.com and use discount code: RBG GO MINNO: Visit GoMinno.com to get a one month FREE TRIAL using code: RBG OUR PLACE: Stop cooking with toxic cookware, and upgrade to Our Place today. Visit fromourplace.com/RBG and use code RBG for 10% off sitewide. HIYA HEALTH: Visit hiyahealth.com/RBG to get 50% off your first order. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    36 min
  3. Episode 375: Capable the Young Adult Years with David and Sissy

    MAY 14

    Episode 375: Capable the Young Adult Years with David and Sissy

    In this episode, Sissy Goff and David Thomas discuss the growing challenges many young adults face, including entitlement, emotional fragility, difficulty handling feedback, and struggles with responsibility and relationships. They explain how capability is built through real-life experiences like disappointment, inconvenience, accountability, conflict resolution, and service to others. The conversation encourages parents to stop removing every obstacle, allow natural consequences, and support young adults as they learn to navigate hard things with resilience and maturity.  . . . . . .  Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Pre-order our new book, Capable and grab tickets for Capable - The Book Tour here! See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .  If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form. QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply. SHOPIFY: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGShopify to learn more about Shopify! LEGACY BOX: Legacybox is running their Mother’s Day sale and they’re also offering an additional $10 off your order. Visit Legacybox.com and use discount code: RBG GO MINNO: Visit GoMinno.com to get a one month FREE TRIAL using code: RBG BRODO: Head to brodo.com/rbg for 20% off your first subscription order, and use code RBG for an additional $10 off. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    22 min
  4. Episode 374: The Cornerstone of Resilience and Capability with Dr. Ken Ginsburg

    MAY 12

    Episode 374: The Cornerstone of Resilience and Capability with Dr. Ken Ginsburg

    In this episode of the Raising Boys and Girls podcast, Dr. Ken Ginsburg explains that resilience is built through strong, loving relationships and introduces his “7 Cs” of resilience: confidence, competence, character, connection, contribution, coping, and control. Drawing from his work with adolescents, he encourages parents to guide rather than control their children so they can develop confidence, healthy coping skills, and a lasting sense of purpose, while emphasizing the importance of human connection in a technology-driven world. Resources mentioned: Lighthouse Parenting: Raising Your Child With Loving Guidance for a Lifelong Bond by Dr. Ken Ginsberg Center for Parent and Teen Communication - which provides guidance and resources for parents navigating adolescence and technology. . . . . . .  Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Pre-order our new book, Capable and grab tickets for Capable - The Book Tour here! See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .  If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form. QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply. SHOPIFY: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGShopify to learn more about Shopify! LEGACY BOX: Legacybox is running their Mother’s Day sale and they’re also offering an additional $10 off your order. Visit Legacybox.com and use discount code: RBG GO MINNO: Visit GoMinno.com to get a one month FREE TRIAL using code: RBG OUR PLACE: Stop cooking with toxic cookware, and upgrade to Our Place today. Visit fromourplace.com/RBG and use code RBG for 10% off sitewide.HIYA HEALTH: Visit hiyahealth.com/RBG to get 50% off your first order. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    39 min
  5. Episode 373: Capable the High School Years with David and Sissy

    MAY 7

    Episode 373: Capable the High School Years with David and Sissy

    This conversation highlights a growing “capability gap” in teens, where some, often girls, are overwhelmed by pressure and perfectionism while others, often boys, are disengaged and avoidant. David and Sissy connect this to factors like digital communication, lowered relationship standards, and increased screen use, all of which can hinder resilience and healthy development. They emphasize that true capability is built through real-life challenges, responsibility, and healthy risk-taking, and encourage parents to raise expectations, foster strong relationships, teach coping skills, and create space for both rest and growth. Resources mentioned: Capable: How to Teach Your Kids the Strengths, Skills, and Strategies to Build Resilience by David Thomas and Sissy Goff The Addiction Inoculation: Raising Healthy Kids in a Culture of Dependence by Jessica Lahey Navigating Our Teens Dating with Paula Faris Birds & Bees . . . . . .  Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Pre-order our new book, Capable and grab tickets for Capable - The Book Tour here! See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .  If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form. QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply. SHOPIFY: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGShopify to learn more about Shopify! LEGACY BOX: Legacybox is running their Mother’s Day sale and they’re also offering an additional $10 off your order. Visit Legacybox.com and use discount code: RBG GO MINNO: Visit GoMinno.com to get a one month FREE TRIAL using code: RBG JOLIE: Jolie will give you your best skin & hair guaranteed. Head to jolieskinco.com/RBG to try it out for yourself with FREE shipping. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    26 min
  6. Episode 372: When to Push and When to Pull Back in the Middle School Years with Dr. Lisa Damour

    MAY 5

    Episode 372: When to Push and When to Pull Back in the Middle School Years with Dr. Lisa Damour

    Dr. Lisa Damour explains that resilience comes from learning to handle discomfort, not avoiding it, and reminds parents that mental health isn’t about always feeling happy. Especially in the middle school years, kids face rapid changes and self-doubt, making it crucial for parents to support rather than rescue. By allowing kids to work through hard moments while staying gently connected, we help them build the confidence and capability they need for life. Resources mentioned: Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood by Dr. Lisa Damour Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls by Dr. Lisa Damour The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents by Dr. Lisa Damour . . . . . .  Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Pre-order our new book, Capable and grab tickets for Capable - The Book Tour here! See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .  If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form. QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply. SHOPIFY: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGShopify to learn more about Shopify! LEGACY BOX: Legacybox is running their Mother’s Day sale and they’re also offering an additional $10 off your order. Visit Legacybox.com and use discount code: RBG GO MINNO: Visit GoMinno.com to get a one month FREE TRIAL using code: RBG Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    46 min
  7. Episode 371: Capable the Middle School Years with David and Sissy

    APR 30

    Episode 371: Capable the Middle School Years with David and Sissy

    Middle school is a crucial but often overlooked stage where kids need practice, not perfection, as they navigate social disconnection, increased screen use, and deep self-consciousness. By creating opportunities for real-life interaction, responsibility, healthy voices, and manageable discomfort, parents can help kids build the resilience and capability they’ll need for what’s ahead. Resources mentioned: Raising Worry-Free Girls: Helping Your Daughter Feel Braver, Stronger, and Smarter in an Anxious World by Sissy Goff Raising Emotionally Strong Boys: Tools Your Son Can Build On for Life by David Thomas . . . . . .  Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Pre-order our new book, Capable and grab tickets for Capable - The Book Tour here! See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .  If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form. HOPE SPRINGS: Listen along to Hope Springs, https://tinyurl.com/RBGHopeSprings, a family audio drama series following the lives and adventures of a few Colorado kids  QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply. NIV ILLUSTRATING BIBLE: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGNIVIllustratingBible to learn more about the NIV Illustrating Bible. EVERYBODY GET A JUICE BOX: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGJuiceboxPodcast to learn more about this podcast on neurodiverse parenting.  SHOPIFY: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGShopify to learn more about Shopify! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    22 min
  8. Episode 370: From Trauma to Regulation to Resilience with Neurobiologist Dr. Bruce Perry

    APR 28

    Episode 370: From Trauma to Regulation to Resilience with Neurobiologist Dr. Bruce Perry

    Dr. Bruce Perry unpacks the difference between stress, adversity, and trauma, helping parents shift from asking “what’s wrong with you?” to “what happened to you?” He explains how moderate, predictable stress actually builds resilience, while overprotection can limit a child’s growth. He also highlights the powerful role of relationships—especially how a regulated parent can calm a dysregulated child—and offers practical ways to foster connection through rhythm, movement, and presence. Ultimately, he reminds us that understanding a child’s story is key to helping them heal and grow. Resources mentioned: The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog by Bruce Perry and Maia Szalavitz Born for Love: Why Empathy Is Essential—and Endangered by Bruce Perry and Maia Szalavitz What Happened to You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing by Bruce Perry and Oprah Winfrey . . . . . .  Sign up to receive the⁠ bi-⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠monthly newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to keep up to date with where David and Sissy are speaking, where they are taco'ing, PLUS conversation starters for you and your family to share! Pre-order our new book, Capable and grab tickets for Capable - The Book Tour here! See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .  If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form. HOPE SPRINGS: Listen along to Hope Springs, https://tinyurl.com/RBGHopeSprings, a family audio drama series following the lives and adventures of a few Colorado kids  QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply. NIV ILLUSTRATING BIBLE: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGNIVIllustratingBible to learn more about the NIV Illustrating Bible. EVERYBODY GET A JUICE BOX: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGJuiceboxPodcast to learn more about this podcast on neurodiverse parenting.  SHOPIFY: Go to https://tinyurl.com/RBGShopify to learn more about Shopify!CASPER: Save up to 30% on mattresses and up to 35% on everything else when you go to Casper.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    50 min

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About

Welcome to the Raising Boys and Girls Podcast with Sissy Goff, David Thomas, and Melissa Trevathan. In each episode of this podcast, we’ll share some of what we’re learning in the work we do with kids and families on a daily basis at Daystar Counseling Ministries. Our goal is to help you care for the kids in your life with a little more understanding, a little more practical help, and a whole lot of hope. So pull up a chair and join us on this journey of raising boys and girls. Connect with us at raisingboysandgirls.com.

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