Black Girls Heal

Shena Lashey
  • 4.8 (1.7K)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY
Black Girls Heal

Black Girls Heal helps women break out of cycles of unhealthy relationships with unavailable partners and feeling not enough by combining coaching, therapeutic support, and practical tools. Every episode, we will talk about intimacy, attachment, healing unresolved trauma, and growing in our self worth.

  1. 3D AGO

    #285: 3 Mistakes Love Avoidants Make in Dating

    Is your fear of intimacy keeping you from the love you want? In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we’re diving deep into love avoidance—what it is, how it shows up, and the mistakes that keep us from building healthy, connected relationships. If you find yourself pulling away when things get too good, struggling to be vulnerable, or avoiding dating altogether, you’re not alone. These patterns often come from past trauma and a desire to protect ourselves, but they can also block the very intimacy we’re craving. Whether you’re just starting to explore this part of your healing or you’ve been working on it for a while, this episode offers real talk and real tools to support your journey. In this episode, we cover… 02:43 The most common mistakes love avoidants make in relationships05:35 How trauma creates defense mechanisms that block intimacy14:59 Mistake #1: Getting spooked when things are going well23:20 Mistake #2: Struggling to be emotionally vulnerable30:07 Mistake #3: Avoiding dating altogether36:25 Final reflections and steps to move forward Resources mentioned in the episode: Episode 284: 3 Dating Mistakes to Avoid As A Love Addict: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/284-dating-mistakesHow to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired Connect with us: Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/black-girls-heal/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    38 min

  2. MAR 18

    #284: 3 Dating Mistakes to Avoid as a Love Addict

    Are you falling in love with potential instead of reality? In this episode of Black Girls Heal, I’m diving into three critical mistakes love addicts make when dating—mistakes that can keep you stuck in unhealthy cycles. Whether you're unknowingly romanticizing red flags, struggling to walk away from emotionally unavailable partners, or making dating your full-time job, this episode will help you break free from these patterns. In this episode, we cover… 03:00 - Why falling in love with potential keeps you stuck10:45 - The importance of trusting your instincts when red flags appear17:30 - How making dating your hobby can lead to emotional burnout24:15 - Breaking the cycle of fantasy-driven relationships30:40 - Practical steps to build a fulfilling life outside of dating Resources mentioned in the episode: Download the Free Love Addiction & Avoidance Roadmap: blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired Connect with us: Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/black-girls-heal/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    33 min

  3. MAR 11

    #283: How to Host a Healing Circle With Friends

    In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, I'm diving deep into how healing circles can transform your journey through love addiction recovery. After years of coaching women through attachment struggles, I've seen firsthand how creating the right community can accelerate healing in ways individual work simply can't. We explore exactly how to build your own healing circle—from finding the right participants to establishing crucial ground rules that create safety for vulnerability. I share practical tips for structuring your meetings, developing a curriculum that promotes real growth, and navigating the inevitable conflicts that arise when people are doing deep healing work together. In this episode, we cover… 02:35 - The sisterhood effect on healing03:56 - How to create your own healing circle09:16 - Setting your healing circle up for success17:16 - Ground rules for safety29:13 - Ways to structure your healing circle34:41 - How to ask and provide for feedback 45:42 - How to find your circle sisters Resources mentioned in the episode: Listen to Episode 282: How to Heal in Community (7 Tips to Make Sisterhood Work): blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/282-heal-communityThe Black Girls Healing Circle Workbook: https://amzn.to/3Dx3uDjListen to Episode 56: Starting A Healing Circle: blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/episode-55-starting-a-healing-circleThe Healed and Loved Woman Retreat: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/retreatHow to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired Connect with us: Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/black-girls-heal/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    51 min

  4. MAR 4

    #282: How to Heal in Community (7 Tips to Make Sisterhood Work)

    In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, I'm diving deep into something that's essential for our healing journey but often overlooked—the power of sisterhood and community. As someone who's experienced both the isolation of healing alone and the transformative power of healing in community, I'm sharing seven practical tips to help you build and nurture meaningful friendships that support your growth. In this episode, we cover… 01:00 The importance of community in healing04:45 Where to find friends15:41 Why you should invest in friendships18:24 Challenges in building friendships26:29 Finding friends with a good track record32:20 How to handle rejection and ghosting35:37 Accepting different levels of friendship42:42 Prioritizing self-care and avoidance to grow your friendships Resources mentioned in the episode: Listen to Episode 56: Starting A Healing Circle: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/episode-55-starting-a-healing-circleThe Black Girls Healing Circle Workbook: https://amzn.to/3Dx3uDjListen to Episode 108: How to Make Adult Female Friendships with Danielle Bayard Jackson: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/episode-108-how-to-make-adult-female-friendships-with-danielle-bayard-jacksonThe Healed and Loved Woman Retreat: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/retreatJoin our email list: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/mailing-listHow to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired Connect with us: Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/black-girls-heal/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    50 min

  5. FEB 25

    #281: Why You Stay in Relationships When You're Tired

    In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're having an honest conversation about something that hits deep—why we stay in relationships even when we're completely exhausted. From social media discussions to real-life experiences, we're seeing how women often find themselves caught in cycles of emotional labor and self-improvement, all while trying to make a relationship work that's draining their energy. Through my years of coaching women, I've identified the key stages we go through in these relationships: from the initial comfort and commitment, through the stress and burnout, to the moments of clarity that finally lead to change. In this episode, we cover… 09:14 Stages of relationship commitment13:35 Stress and burnout in relationships25:49 Emotional and physical impact of relationships36:50 Resignation vs. true self-love45:50 Deep self-forgiveness and trauma work Resources mentioned in the episode: Listen to Episode 174: Healing our Womb and Pelvic Floor with Dr. Alicia Jeffrey-Thomas: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/174-healing-our-womb-pelvic-floor-with-dr-alicia-jeffrey-thomasHow to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired Connect with us: Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/black-girls-heal/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    47 min

  6. FEB 18

    #280: How to Cope When Your Dating Partner Stops Responding (No Contact)

    In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're diving deep into something that can shake your whole world—when someone you're dating suddenly goes quiet or starts feeding you breadcrumbs of attention. Whether they're ghosting you completely or keeping you hanging with "I'm just busy" texts, we're getting real about what this behavior actually means. Through my years of coaching women through love addiction recovery, I've seen how these disappearing acts can leave us questioning our worth and replaying every moment trying to figure out what we did wrong. Today, I'm breaking down the manipulation tactics some people use to keep you attached, and more importantly, how to recognize them before they drain your energy. In this episode, we cover… 03:31 Common manipulation tactics14:24 How to break the self-blame cycle26:02 Doing the inner work31:33 How to communicate your needs39:42 The truth about disappearing acts43:18 Coping with no contact Resources mentioned in the episode: How to Pick Partner Checklist: blackgirlsheal.thrivecart.com/how-to-pick-partners-checklist/Listen to Episode 253: The 4 Steps of No Contact: blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/steps-no-contactListen to Episode 279: 4 Steps to Help Yourself Heal and Relationships to Flourish: blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/279-4-steps-heal-yourself-relationships-flourish How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired Connect with us: Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/black-girls-heal/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    50 min

  7. FEB 11

    #279: 4 Steps to Help Yourself Heal & Relationships to Flourish

    In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, I'm breaking down the complete framework I use with my coaching clients to transform their relationship patterns — the Bloom Method. After years of helping women heal from love addiction, love avoidance, and love deprivation, I've developed this powerful approach that guides you from identifying toxic roots to cultivating lasting change. Through my work at the Love Addiction Recovery School, I've seen how this method helps women restore their relationship with themselves and create deeper, more authentic connections with others. Think of it like tending a garden: we start by uprooting what no longer serves you, cultivate fresh soil for new growth, harvest the fruits of your work, and learn how to maintain your flourishing garden. In this episode, we cover… 00:57 Overview of the Love Addiction Recovery School03:24 The Bloom Method Explained06:23 Step 1: Uprooting the Weeds16:54 Step 2: Cultivating the Ground25:14 Step 3: Harvesting the Fruits29:46 Step 4: Tending and Maintaining Resources mentioned in the episode: Listen to Episode 278: The First Three Steps to Heal Love AddictionReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements. Connect with us: Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/black-girls-heal/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    36 min

  8. FEB 4

    #278: The First 3 Steps to Heal Love Addiction

    In this episode of the Black Girls Heal  podcast, we dive deep into the topic of love addiction and explore the steps to break free from its cycles. Learn about the free downloadable resource “The Five Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction” and discover how to identify and detox from addictive relationships. We also discuss the importance of addressing unresolved childhood wounds and building a supportive network for effective healing. Whether you are dealing with love addiction, love avoidance, or love deprivation, this episode provides invaluable insights and tools to help you achieve a love-balanced life. In this episode, we cover… 03:53 What is Love Addiction?06:51 Steps to heal Love Addiction15:42 Detoxing from addictive relationships30:24 Why you need to clear toxic roots Resources mentioned in the episode: Stop your love addiction patterns in 5 steps using the Heal Love Addiction RoadmapCheck out the How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts bookReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements. Connect with us: Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/black-girls-heal/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    35 min
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4.8
out of 5
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About

Black Girls Heal helps women break out of cycles of unhealthy relationships with unavailable partners and feeling not enough by combining coaching, therapeutic support, and practical tools. Every episode, we will talk about intimacy, attachment, healing unresolved trauma, and growing in our self worth.

Information

  • Creator
    Shena Lashey
  • Years Active
    2019 - 2025
  • Episodes
    321
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © All rights reserved.
  • Show Website
    Black Girls Heal
  • Provider
    Shena Sandle

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