Clemenz With a ”Z” Podcast

Roy Clemenz
  • 4.7 (34)
  • PERSONAL JOURNALS
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This podcast is me sharing stories as I search for balance in an imbalanced world. I discuss topics such as fatherhood, masculinity, and religion through stories of myself and interviews.

  1. 4D AGO

    EP 223 Essence Isn’t the Same as Capacity: On Original Sin, Children, and the Cost of Starting with Shame

    In this episode on Clemenz With a "Z", I reflect on the doctrine of original sin and the story we tell children about who they are at their core. Beginning with a quote from the book "Original Sin Is a Lie" and moving through Genesis, Romans 7, and even a scene from Harry Potter, I am wrestling with the difference between capacity and essence between being capable of harm and being defined by it.  Reflecting on my own childhood and the experience of watching my kid instinctively show generosity, I am ask whether starting with shame shapes a different nervous system than starting with dignity. This isn’t an attempt to burn anything down, but an invitation to widen the space and reconsider the foundation we build on. If something in this conversation resonated with you, I’d love to hear from you. You can email me at clemenzwithaz@gmail.com, or send me a DM over on Instagram at @clemenzwithazpodcast. If you want to support the podcast financially, you can head over to ClemenzWithAZ.com, there’s a merch store there with shirts, stickers, all kinds of stuff. You can also donate directly through the GoFundMe, the link’s in the show notes. Every bit goes a long way in helping me keep these conversations going. And if you’re looking for something a little more regular, check out my Substack: Devotions for the Disillusioned & Deconstructing. That’s where I share short reflections, devotionals, and some extra behind-the-scenes thoughts that don’t always make it onto the podcast. And of course, the best way you can support the show is by subscribing, rating, and leaving a review wherever you listen to podcasts. Share it with a friend, post it on your socials, drop it in a group chat, it all helps more than you know. This podcast keeps going because of listeners like you showing up, engaging, and passing it on. So thank you for being here, for listening, and for being part of this messy middle with me. Until next time, take care of yourselves, and each other.

    21 min

  2. 6D AGO

    EP 222 Higher Ways? Rethinking Mystery, Justice, and the God We Inherited

    In this episode, Higher Ways?, I wrestle with a question that’s been quietly sitting with me for a long time: What if some of what we call “deep theology” is simply human logic dressed up as divine wisdom? From heaven and hell to reward and punishment, from obedience to atonement, I explore the framework many of us inherited and ask whether love really needs a threat to function. Drawing from my own experience in a high-control church environment and revisiting the teachings of Jesus with fresh eyes, this isn’t an attempt to tear faith down, it’s a thoughtful dismantling meant to clear space. Space for a version of faith less rooted in fear and more grounded in restoration, honesty, and love that doesn’t keep score. If something in this conversation resonated with you, I’d love to hear from you. You can email me at clemenzwithaz@gmail.com, or send me a DM over on Instagram at @clemenzwithazpodcast. If you want to support the podcast financially, you can head over to ClemenzWithAZ.com, there’s a merch store there with shirts, stickers, all kinds of stuff. You can also donate directly through the GoFundMe, the link’s in the show notes. Every bit goes a long way in helping me keep these conversations going. And if you’re looking for something a little more regular, check out my Substack: Devotions for the Disillusioned & Deconstructing. That’s where I share short reflections, devotionals, and some extra behind-the-scenes thoughts that don’t always make it onto the podcast. And of course, the best way you can support the show is by subscribing, rating, and leaving a review wherever you listen to podcasts. Share it with a friend, post it on your socials, drop it in a group chat, it all helps more than you know. This podcast keeps going because of listeners like you showing up, engaging, and passing it on. So thank you for being here, for listening, and for being part of this messy middle with me. Until next time, take care of yourselves, and each other.

    15 min

  3. FEB 23

    EP 221 Scars Don’t Shout: On Integration, Memory, and the Hum of Healing

    In this episode of Clemenz With a “Z,” I reflect on what happens on the other side of healing. We talk a lot about wounds and unraveling, about leaving and deconstructing, about anger and survival. But what about integration? What about the quiet phase where you’re no longer bleeding yet you’re not who you used to be either? Through the metaphor of physical scars and the unseen marks we carry in our minds and nervous systems, this episode explores the idea that healing doesn’t erase the mark, it transforms it. If you’ve ever wondered why certain words still make your chest tighten, or why tenderness lingers even after growth, this conversation is for you. Scars don’t shout. They hum. And that hum might just be wisdom. If anything in this episode resonated with you and you would like to reach out to me you can drop me a line at clemenzwithaz@gmail.com or drop a DM at the clemenz with a "Z" instagram page.   You can head over to https://gofund.me/7ebb0524 every bit helps. And if you’re looking for more reflection, honesty, and spiritual wrestling, check out my Substack: Devotions for the Deconstructing & Disillusioned, it’s a space for people who still have soul, but no longer fit in the boxes they were handed. Thanks for being here.

    18 min

  4. FEB 18

    EP 220 Yard Signs: Purpose, Dignity, and the Paths We Call “Less”

    On this episode of Clemenz With a “Z,” I’m stepping outside my usual conversations about church and control and into something that’s been quietly sitting with me for years: the way we define success for our kids. Every June, neighborhoods fill with yard signs celebrating college commitments, and I can’t help but ask, where are the yard signs for future carpenters? In this episode, I reflect on my own high school experience with “two tracks,” the subtle tone that labeled one path as less than, what I saw later as a teacher, and why all of this ultimately comes down to purpose. Drawing on Viktor Frankl and even a surprising moment from Home Improvement, this conversation isn’t anti-college, it’s about dignity, meaning, and making room for every kind of intelligence. Because not every boy wants to build… but every boy deserves a world that believes he could. If anything in this episode resonated with you and you would like to reach out to me you can drop me a line at clemenzwithaz@gmail.com or drop a DM at the clemenz with a "Z" instagram page.   You can head over to https://gofund.me/7ebb0524 every bit helps. And if you’re looking for more reflection, honesty, and spiritual wrestling, check out my Substack: Devotions for the Deconstructing & Disillusioned, it’s a space for people who still have soul, but no longer fit in the boxes they were handed. Thanks for being here.

    24 min

  5. FEB 16

    EP 219: We Were In a Cult? Stef's Story

    In this episode of We Were In a Cult?, I sit down with Stef, a fellow “Kingdom kid” who grew up inside the ICOC to explore what it was like to be born into a system where church wasn’t just something you attended, but the entire framework for how you understood God, authority, obedience, and belonging. This conversation isn’t about sensationalism or tearing people down. It’s about memory. It’s about untangling fear from faith. It’s about what happens when reverence and anxiety get braided together in childhood and what it takes, as adults, to slowly learn how to trust our own voices again. Whether you were part of the ICOC, the ICC, another high-control church environment, or you’re simply curious about what that world felt like from the inside, this episode is an honest window into that experience. If you are a member, were a member, or know someone who was a member of the ICOC or ICC and would like to share your story about life in and out of the church, I’d love to hear from you. Together, we can continue exploring the question, “We were in a cult?” and perhaps find some healing along the way. You can reach me via email at clemenzwithaz@gmail.com, or send me a DM on Instagram at the Clemenz With a Z podcast page. If you want to support the podcast financially, you can head over to ClemenzWithAZ.com, there’s a merch store there with shirts, stickers, all kinds of stuff. You can also donate directly through the GoFundMe, the link’s in the show notes. Every bit goes a long way in helping me keep these conversations going. And if you’re looking for something a little more regular, check out my Substack: Devotions for the Disillusioned & Deconstructing. That’s where I share short reflections, devotionals, and some extra behind-the-scenes thoughts that don’t always make it onto the podcast. And of course, the best way you can support the show is by subscribing, rating, and leaving a review wherever you listen to podcasts. Share it with a friend, post it on your socials, drop it in a group chat, it all helps more than you know. This podcast keeps going because of listeners like you showing up, engaging, and passing it on. So thank you for being here, for listening, and for being part of this messy middle with me. Until next time, take care of yourselves, and each other.

    1h 56m

  6. FEB 13

    EP 218 Raised in the Kingdom: Growing Up Inside the Place and Learning to Trust Myself Again

    What does it mean to grow up inside something that calls itself the Kingdom of God? In this episode, I reflect on what it was like to be a “Kingdom kid” born into the International Churches of Christ, shaped by its language, boundaries, fears, and promises from my earliest memories. This isn’t a takedown. It’s an honest look at safety, identity, fear of being “out,” and the long process of learning to trust myself again after realizing the place that formed me wasn’t what I thought it was. If you grew up in a high-control church environment or if you’ve ever had to untangle your identity from the system that raised you, this conversation is for you. We weren’t crazy. We were kids. If something in this conversation resonated with you especially if you were part of the ICOC, or you were what we called a “Kingdom kid” I’d really love to hear from you. Tell me where you’re at. Tell me how you’re healing. Tell me what this journey has looked like for you. You can email me at clemenzwithaz@gmail.com, or send me a DM over on Instagram at @clemenzwithazpodcast. And if you’d ever want to share your story more publicly maybe as part of the "We Were in a Cult?" series here on the podcast let’s talk. These stories matter. And I think there’s a lot of us still untangling what this all meant. If you want to support the podcast financially, you can head over to ClemenzWithAZ.com, there’s a merch store there with shirts, stickers, all kinds of stuff. You can also donate directly through the GoFundMe, the link’s in the show notes. Every bit goes a long way in helping me keep these conversations going. And if you’re looking for something a little more regular, check out my Substack: Devotions for the Disillusioned & Deconstructing. That’s where I share short reflections, devotionals, and some extra behind-the-scenes thoughts that don’t always make it onto the podcast. And of course, the best way you can support the show is by subscribing, rating, and leaving a review wherever you listen to podcasts. Share it with a friend, post it on your socials, drop it in a group chat, it all helps more than you know. This podcast keeps going because of listeners like you showing up, engaging, and passing it on. So thank you for being here, for listening, and for being part of this messy middle with me. We weren’t crazy. We were kids. Until next time—take care of yourselves, and each other.

    42 min

  7. FEB 9

    EP 217: Gentle vs. Godly? Why Parenting Isn’t an Either/Or Choice

    In this episode, I wrestle with a claim I’ve been seeing more and more in Christian spaces: that “gentle parenting” is not the same as “godly parenting” and that starting from empathy or believing kids are inherently good is somehow dangerous or unbiblical. Instead of turning this into another parenting culture war, I slow the conversation down. I explore what gentle parenting actually is, what people mean when they talk about godly or gospel-centered parenting, and why these two ideas keep getting pitted against each other. Drawing from my own experience as a parent, a former teacher, and someone shaped by fear-based faith, I push back on the either/or mindset and make the case for a more honest, relational approach to raising kids, one rooted in love, empathy, consistency, boundaries, and the humility to admit we’re all still learning as we go. If anything in this episode resonated with you and you would like to reach out to me you can drop me a line at clemenzwithaz@gmail.com or drop a DM at the clemenz with a "Z" instagram page.   You can head over to https://gofund.me/7ebb0524 every bit helps. And if you’re looking for more reflection, honesty, and spiritual wrestling, check out my Substack: Devotions for the Deconstructing & Disillusioned, it’s a space for people who still have soul, but no longer fit in the boxes they were handed. Thanks for being here.

    36 min

  8. JAN 30

    EP 216 Critique Is Not Persecution: Why pushback isn’t proof you’re right

    What's up y'all! In this episode, I explore the growing tendency within evangelical church culture to confuse critique with persecution and why that confusion can be so damaging. This conversation grew out of a recent church experience, a sermon that reframed fear as rebellion, and my own attempt to engage in private, thoughtful dialogue that never quite materialized. Drawing from personal experience, theology, and lived impact, I reflect on what happens when churches prioritize defensiveness over listening, certainty over curiosity, and ego over humility. This isn’t an attack on the church, but an honest examination of how faith communities can lose their capacity for dialogue, and why reclaiming that capacity matters for real healing, growth, and care. If you would like to reach out to me you can drop me a line at clemenzwithaz@gmail.com or drop a DM at the clemenz with a "Z" instagram page.   You can head over to https://gofund.me/7ebb0524 every bit helps. And if you’re looking for more reflection, honesty, and spiritual wrestling, check out my Substack: Devotions for the Deconstructing & Disillusioned, it’s a space for people who still have soul, but no longer fit in the boxes they were handed. Thanks for being here.

    31 min
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4.7
out of 5
34 Ratings

About

This podcast is me sharing stories as I search for balance in an imbalanced world. I discuss topics such as fatherhood, masculinity, and religion through stories of myself and interviews.

Information

  • Creator
    Roy Clemenz
  • Years Active
    2019 - 2026
  • Episodes
    223
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2019 All rights reserved.
  • Show Website
    Clemenz With a ”Z” Podcast

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