The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Doctor Alexandra Stockwell, MD

Alexandra Stockwell, MD
  • 4.7 (169)
  • Relationships
  • Updated Weekly

Welcome to "The Intimate Marriage Podcast," the podcast where we explore the secrets to cultivating passionate and intimate relationships. I'm your host, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell, aka "The Intimacy Doctor," an experienced intimacy coach and marriage expert. In every committed marriage, intimacy and connection are the foundation for a fulfilling relationship. Join me as we delve into how small shifts and being uncompromising in your daily interactions can lead to profound and nourishing physical/emotional intimacy. During each episode, we'll explore topics such as sexual intimacy, emotional awareness, and building an intimate connection that feels comfortable and authentic for you and your partner. I'll share practical advice and strategies to help you unlock the full potential of your relationship. As "The Intimacy Doctor," I've helped countless couples transform their relationships and create a life filled with passion, purpose, and deep satisfaction. With over two decades of experience, I believe that true intimacy and success stem from being unapologetically yourself. Together, let's uncover the secrets to a juicy, nourishing, and intimate marriage. —----------- Download the first chapter of my bestselling book, "Uncompromising Intimacy," here: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/book?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=book If you're ready to take your intimacy skills to the next level, explore my Aligned & Hot Marriage program. It's designed specifically for couples who refuse to settle for anything less than extraordinary love and connection. Visit https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/aligned-hot-marriage/?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ahm to learn more. Join my email list to stay connected—it's where I share my latest insights and offer opportunities for live Q & A: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/subscribe?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=subscribe —---------- WHAT DOES AN INTIMACY COACH DO? An intimacy coach is a trained professional who specializes in helping individuals and couples cultivate deeper connections and enhance their intimate relationships. The role of an intimacy coach is to guide and support their clients in exploring various aspects of intimacy, including emotional, physical, and sexual intimacy. Intimacy coaches create a safe and non-judgmental space for their clients to express their needs, desires, and concerns related to intimacy. An intimacy coach helps clients develop self-awareness and emotional intelligence, enabling them to better understand their own desires and those of their partner. They provide guidance on effective communication techniques, conflict resolution, and exploring new ways to deepen emotional and physical intimacy.

  1. 5d ago

    298. When you try to fix things but it makes them worse

    When something goes wrong, we frequently respond with wanting to do something about it. Fix the problem. Find the solution. Make everything better. And while that can be a wonderful quality, sometimes our urge to fix is actually a way of escaping discomfort. In this episode, Alexandra Stockwell, MD explores the surprising connection between feeling stressed and our tendency to fix. She explains how fight, flight, and freeze can evolve into “fix” in adulthood, particularly for capable, ambitious people who have learned to feel safe by solving problems and keeping everything under control. Alexandra offers practical ways to recognize when you're fixing from a place of stress versus offering solutions from a place of calm, spaciousness, and choice. She also shares simple tools to regulate your nervous system in the moment and to build a more resilient baseline over time. In this episode, you'll discover: • Why “fixing” can become a stress response in adulthood• How to tell the difference between empowered problem-solving and compulsive fixing• Why a calm nervous system is essential for intimacy, communication, and passion• Simple ways to pause and regulate yourself when you're triggered• How meditation, movement, pleasure, nature, and other practices strengthen your nervous system• Why knowing you have multiple options is a sign that responding rather than reacting You don't have to stop fixing things. The invitation is to notice why you're fixing them. When you soothe yourself first, you’ll create the space to respond with greater curiosity, creativity, and connection.

  2. Sep 2

    297. The Simple Habit That Keeps Intimacy Alive

    This episode isn't really about kissing—it's about the small, repeated moments of connection that create the culture of a marriage.  Small moments of connection can have a surprisingly powerful impact on the quality of a marriage. In this episode of The Intimate Marriage Podcast, Alexandra Stockwell, MD explores the research behind kissing your spouse before leaving for work and reveals why she believes the kiss itself isn't actually what makes the difference. Instead, it's the culture of connection, attention, and affection that makes these small rituals so meaningful. Alexandra shares simple ways to build more moments of intimacy into everyday life, from saying good morning and greeting your spouse when you come home to making time for connection before bed. Because over time, these seemingly small moments become the nourishment that keeps emotional connection, intimacy, and passion alive. Resources Mentioned: Research on kissing and marital connection referenced in the episode Connect With Alexandra Stockwell, MD: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ | ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ | ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get your copy of “Uncompromising Intimacy” by Alexandra Stockwell, MD here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Download the first chapter of Dr. Alexandra’s bestselling book, “Uncompromising Intimacy,” here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/book⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Cultivate your intimacy skills (without compromise) in Aligned & Hot Marriage, Alexandra’s proven method for smart couples ready to love more fully: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.alignedhotmarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Join Alexandra’s email list to stay connected. She shares inspiring stories, her latest insights, and opportunities to learn with her: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/subscribe⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

  3. Aug 26

    296. Pleasure Is Part Of Healing, Not The Reward For It | with Dr. Kimberly Pendleton

    Many people believe they need to completely heal before they can experience deep intimacy, joy, or desire. But what if waiting until you're "fixed" keeps you from the very experiences that help you heal? In this conversation, Alexandra Stockwell, MD welcomes intimacy coach and trauma-informed educator Dr. Kimberly Pendleton for a compassionate discussion about the relationship between trauma, pleasure, and lasting intimacy. Together, they explore why healing isn't a linear journey, how reconnecting with your senses can restore your sense of self, and why flirtation, confidence, and playfulness aren't frivolous—they're powerful expressions of feeling fully alive. Whether you're navigating the effects of past trauma, supporting a loved one through their healing, or simply longing for a more vibrant relationship with yourself and your partner, this episode offers a hopeful perspective on what's possible. In this episode, you'll discover: • Why pleasure can be an essential part of healing rather than something to postpone• How trauma impacts identity, desire, and emotional connection• Practical ways couples can create safer conversations around past experiences• Why flirtation is really about confidence, aliveness, and enjoying yourself in the presence of another• Small, intentional practices that help you reconnect with your body and your joy Healing isn't about becoming someone new. It's about reclaiming the parts of yourself that have always deserved love, pleasure, and connection. Connect with Dr. Kimberly Pendleton: Website: www.kimberlyrosependleton.comInstagram: www.instagram.com/drkimberlyrosependletonFree Pleasure Bundle: https://www.kimberlyrosependleton.com/offers/LeK3pvdA/checkout?coupon_code=BRAVOBRAVOBRAVO

  4. Aug 19

    295. What if your best sex is yet to come?

    Many of us assume that passion naturally fades with time and that the most exciting years of our sex lives are behind us. But what if that's simply a story we've been told? What if intimacy, pleasure, and desire can continue to grow throughout your marriage? In this episode, Alexandra Stockwell challenges the belief that long-term relationships inevitably become predictable in the bedroom. She explains why satisfying sex isn't about recapturing the excitement of the early years, but about intentionally allowing your intimate relationship to evolve as you evolve. Through practical examples and gentle encouragement, she shares how small acts of curiosity and adventure can reignite connection without sacrificing the trust and safety that make intimacy meaningful. Whether your sex life feels routine, disconnected, or simply ready for something new, this episode will inspire you to see lasting passion in an entirely different way. In this episode, you'll discover: • Why your sex life should continue growing throughout every stage of marriage • How routine quietly diminishes intimacy and erotic energy • The difference between functional sex and deeply connected intimacy • Simple, approachable ways to bring more playfulness and adventure into your relationship • Why meaningful change happens one small, courageous step at a time Your marriage doesn't have to settle into predictability. With curiosity, intention, and a willingness to grow together, your most intimate years may still be waiting for you. Past Episodes on BDSM:

  5. Aug 12

    294. The strongest move in your marriage is going first | with Dr. Corey Allan

    When something feels off in your relationship, it's natural to hope your partner will be the one to change first. But waiting often keeps couples stuck in the same painful patterns. Real transformation begins when someone has the courage to take the first step. In this conversation, Alexandra Stockwell sits down with marriage therapist and host of Sexy Marriage Radio, Dr. Corey Allan, to explore why taking responsibility for your own growth is one of the most powerful gifts you can give your marriage. Together, they unpack the difference between compromising and honoring your individuality, why our differences can strengthen rather than weaken a relationship, and how authenticity creates deeper intimacy. If you've ever found yourself waiting for your spouse to apologize, communicate differently, or meet your needs before making a change yourself, this episode offers a refreshing perspective that can shift the entire dynamic of your relationship. In this episode, you'll discover: • Why "going first" is an act of strength, not surrender • How focusing on yourself changes the entire relationship dynamic • Why your differences don't have to become points of conflict • The hidden cost of waiting for your partner to change first • How authenticity creates more intimacy than people-pleasing ever can Healthy marriages aren't built by keeping score. They're built by two people who are willing to grow, take responsibility, and choose connection, even when it feels vulnerable. Connect with Dr. Corey Allan: Website:⁠ https://marriagefullyalive.com/about/⁠ Books:⁠ https://www.amazon.com/Books-Dr-Corey-Allan⁠ Sexy Marriage Radio:⁠ https://smr.fm/about/⁠ Alexandra and Corey’s previous conversation: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/108-sexy-marriage-radio-w-dr-corey-pam-allan/

  6. Aug 5

    293. Turning Her On: What if better sex starts long before the bedroom?

    Many couples believe the key to a more satisfying sex life is finding the right technique or creating the perfect mood. But often, the most meaningful intimacy begins with something much simpler: feeling deeply seen, understood, and emotionally connected. In this episode, Alexandra Stockwell responds to a thoughtful listener's question about maintaining intimacy after nearly five decades of marriage. She explores why emotional curiosity, playful connection, and honest conversations about sex create the foundation for a vibrant intimate life, no matter how long you've been together. Whether you've been married for five years or 50, this episode offers practical, compassionate guidance for nurturing the kind of connection that naturally leads to greater closeness, trust, and desire. In this episode, you'll discover: - Why emotional connection is often the missing ingredient in physical intimacy - How asking meaningful questions can deepen your relationship every day - The surprising role that playfulness and novelty have in sustaining desire - Why talking about sex after intimacy can strengthen your connection - How both partners can take responsibility for creating a fulfilling intimate life Lasting intimacy isn't built by finding the perfect technique. It's created one conversation, one playful moment, and one intentional act of connection at a time.

  7. Jul 29

    292. Can conflict actually bring you closer? | with Devon & Nico Hase

    Most of us grow up believing that healthy relationships have very little conflict. But what if the goal isn't avoiding conflict at all? What if the real opportunity lies in how we repair, reconnect, and grow together afterward? In this conversation, Alexandra Stockwell is joined by meditation teachers and authors Devon and Nico Hase to explore the beautiful, messy reality of long-term partnership. Together, they unpack why conflict styles differ, how mindfulness can transform the way couples navigate disagreements, and why embracing our humanity creates deeper intimacy than striving for perfection ever could. Whether you're the first to seek repair, struggle with difficult conversations, or simply want to feel more connected to your partner, this episode offers compassionate wisdom and practical insights for building a relationship that can hold both the mess and the love. In this episode, you'll discover: - The three common conflict styles and how they shape your relationship - Why repair matters more than avoiding disagreements• How mindfulness and deep listening create stronger connection during difficult moments - What Buddhism can teach us about intimacy without expecting perfection - Why healthy relationships make room for both conflict and joy The strongest relationships aren't conflict-free. They're built by two people who are willing to keep showing up, listening deeply, and choosing connection again and again. Connect with Devon & Nico Hase: Website: https://www.devonandnicohase.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/devonandnicohase Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/devonandnicohase

  8. Jul 22

    291. Do you have enough fun in your marriage?

    When we think about creating a more intimate marriage, it's easy to focus on communication, conflict, or even sex. But what if one of the most powerful ways to strengthen your relationship is also one of the simplest? In this episode, Alexandra Stockwell explores what she calls our modern-day "fun recession" and why so many couples have unintentionally stopped prioritizing joy together. Drawing from years of coaching couples, as well as her own marriage, she shares why laughter, novelty, and play aren't luxuries. They're essential ingredients for emotional closeness, trust, and lasting passion. Whether your relationship feels busy, predictable, or simply overdue for more lighthearted moments, this episode offers a heartfelt invitation to reconnect through shared experiences that bring you both alive. In this episode, you'll discover: • Why fun is a powerful foundation for intimacy• How novelty and shared experiences strengthen emotional and physical connection• Simple ways to bring more laughter, play, and delight into everyday married life• Why creating joy together makes navigating life's challenges easier When you choose fun, you're not avoiding the deeper work of marriage. You're creating the conditions that make deeper connection possible.

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About

Welcome to "The Intimate Marriage Podcast," the podcast where we explore the secrets to cultivating passionate and intimate relationships. I'm your host, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell, aka "The Intimacy Doctor," an experienced intimacy coach and marriage expert. In every committed marriage, intimacy and connection are the foundation for a fulfilling relationship. Join me as we delve into how small shifts and being uncompromising in your daily interactions can lead to profound and nourishing physical/emotional intimacy. During each episode, we'll explore topics such as sexual intimacy, emotional awareness, and building an intimate connection that feels comfortable and authentic for you and your partner. I'll share practical advice and strategies to help you unlock the full potential of your relationship. As "The Intimacy Doctor," I've helped countless couples transform their relationships and create a life filled with passion, purpose, and deep satisfaction. With over two decades of experience, I believe that true intimacy and success stem from being unapologetically yourself. Together, let's uncover the secrets to a juicy, nourishing, and intimate marriage. —----------- Download the first chapter of my bestselling book, "Uncompromising Intimacy," here: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/book?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=book If you're ready to take your intimacy skills to the next level, explore my Aligned & Hot Marriage program. It's designed specifically for couples who refuse to settle for anything less than extraordinary love and connection. Visit https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/aligned-hot-marriage/?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ahm to learn more. Join my email list to stay connected—it's where I share my latest insights and offer opportunities for live Q & A: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/subscribe?utm_source=libsyn&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=subscribe —---------- WHAT DOES AN INTIMACY COACH DO? An intimacy coach is a trained professional who specializes in helping individuals and couples cultivate deeper connections and enhance their intimate relationships. The role of an intimacy coach is to guide and support their clients in exploring various aspects of intimacy, including emotional, physical, and sexual intimacy. Intimacy coaches create a safe and non-judgmental space for their clients to express their needs, desires, and concerns related to intimacy. An intimacy coach helps clients develop self-awareness and emotional intelligence, enabling them to better understand their own desires and those of their partner. They provide guidance on effective communication techniques, conflict resolution, and exploring new ways to deepen emotional and physical intimacy.

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