Black Girl Burnout

Kelley Bonner
  • 4.7 (762)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Semiweekly

Black Girl Burnout is a podcast about burnout, ambition, care, and what it actually takes to build a life that feels good to live—not just impressive from the outside.  Hosted by Kelley Bonner, the show explores how burnout takes hold, why ambition doesn’t need to be abandoned but redesigned, and how joy, rest, and gentleness can coexist with meaningful work and forward movement. Through reflection, practical insight, and carefully chosen conversations, Black Girl Burnout offers both grounding and direction, helping listeners feel seen and take action toward lives that are sustainable, intentional, and their own.

  1. 11h ago

    What Outrage Is Costing Us?

    Over the past several weeks, Kelley has been exploring the idea of thawing—what happens when you move from survival mode into a space where you can finally feel again. In this episode, she examines another form of freezing that often goes unnoticed: outrage. Through reflections on social media discourse, cultural conversations, and personal experiences, Kelley explores how outrage can offer certainty in uncertain times while simultaneously limiting curiosity, connection, and healing. She invites listeners to consider the difference between accountability and punishment, certainty and nuance, and asks a powerful question: What life might be waiting on the other side of anger? Key TakeawaysOutrage can become a freeze response. While anger provides important information, living in a constant state of outrage can limit curiosity, growth, and emotional freedom.Healing requires nuance. Real life exists in complexity, and thawing often begins when we become willing to ask questions instead of rushing to certainty.Accountability and punishment are not the same thing. We can address harm, seek truth, and hold people accountable without losing our humanity or engaging in cruelty.Episode Highlights & Timestamps04:30 — How Outrage Can Become a Frozen State Kelley explores the difference between healthy anger and chronic outrage, and why certainty can feel safer than curiosity during uncertain times. 12:15 — Projection, Social Media, and the Emma Grede Conversation A discussion about cultural discourse, assumptions, and what happens when we stop seeing people as individuals and start treating them as symbols. 28:40 — Accountability Versus Punishment Using public conversations around Cheyenne Bryant as an example, Kelley examines the difference between addressing harm and participating in public cruelty. 46:50 — Returning to Softness and the Thaw Kelley closes with a reflection on vulnerability, nuance, and the possibility of creating a fuller life beyond outrage and reactivity. A Gentle InvitationWhat Are You No Longer Available For?Take a moment this week to notice where certainty may be keeping you stuck. Ask yourself: "What might become possible if I chose curiosity over certainty in one area of my life?" You don't have to abandon discernment or ignore harm. Instead, consider one place where you can create space for nuance, softness, or a deeper question. Sometimes healing begins when you stop reacting long enough to listen to what your heart is trying to tell you. SUPPORT THE SHOWLike, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout. Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time. STAY IN TOUCHJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley. Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops. OUR SPONSORSSuper.com: Visit Super.com for more details. Sista Afya Community Care: www.sistaafya.com Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle Our Sponsors: * Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    29 min

  2. Jun 10

    Opt Into Success Without Self-Abandonment with Sarah Boyd

    What does it look like to pursue ambition without abandoning yourself in the process? In this powerful conversation, Kelley sits down with Sarah Boyd, founder of The Formation, to discuss how Black women can navigate workplace challenges while protecting their wellbeing. Together, they unpack extraction culture, invisible labor, workplace boundaries, self-advocacy, and the difference between excellence and self-sacrifice. Sarah shares practical tools for making your contributions visible, reclaiming your voice, and building a career that supports the life you actually want to live. KEY TAKEAWAYSExcellence should never require self-betrayal. When your success consistently comes at the expense of your boundaries, you've likely moved from excellence into extraction.Visibility isn't about proving your worth. It's about confidently documenting, communicating, and standing on the value you've already created.Your career should support your life. Sustainable ambition starts with defining the life you want and making career decisions that align with it.EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS & TIMESTAMPS06:42 — Making Invisible Labor Visible Sarah explains why documenting your contributions is essential and how Black women can advocate for their work without feeling like they're proving their worth. 22:18 — The Difference Between Excellence and Extraction A powerful discussion about boundaries, overwork, and recognizing when workplace expectations have crossed the line into harmful extraction. 39:55 — Why Your Career Should Fuel Your Life Sarah shares how shifting from "What can I give my job?" to "What does my job give me?" can transform your relationship with work. 57:40 — Building Joyful Resilience and Reclaiming Ambition The conversation explores how Black women can pursue success, protect their peace, and create careers rooted in abundance rather than survival. A GENTLE INVITATIONBefore starting your next workweek, take ten minutes to reflect on this question: Is your current approach to work helping you build the life you want—or simply helping you survive your job? Write down one boundary you need to strengthen and one contribution you want to make more visible this month. Small shifts in self-advocacy can create more space for both success and wellbeing. SUPPORT THE SHOWLike, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout. Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time. STAY IN TOUCHJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley. Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops. OUR SPONSORSSuper.com: Visit Super.com for more details. Sista Afya Community Care: www.sistaafya.com Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle Our Sponsors: * Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    57 min

  3. Jun 3

    Healing, Identity & the Questions I'm Asking Myself Now

    Last week, Kelley shared that she had entered a season of thawing—a period of finally feeling safe enough to stop bracing for impact. This week, she returns with an unexpected discovery: healing hasn't brought certainty. Instead, it has brought questions. Drawing inspiration from Zora Neale Hurston's reminder that "there are years that ask questions and years that answer," Kelley reflects on the deeper inquiries emerging in this season of her life. From reconsidering what she truly needs to thrive to redefining what she wants to be proud of, she explores the difference between performing healing and integrating it. Through personal stories, field notes, and honest observations, this episode offers a glimpse into what happens when you stop chasing answers and start listening to yourself. KEY TAKEAWAYSHealing isn't always about finding answers—it can be about learning to ask better questions.Thriving requires honoring what you actually need, not what you've been taught should make you happy or successful.Integration matters more than performance. Becoming whole is different from appearing healed.EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS & TIMESTAMPS04:56 – The Paris Question That Changed EverythingKelley shares the moment she realized that authenticity, creativity, and passion mattered more to her than the dream she had spent years pursuing.12:42 – What Do You Want to Be Proud Of?A reflection on moving beyond external achievement and redefining success based on the quality of your life, not just what you produce.20:31 – What People Think of Me Is None of My BusinessKelley unpacks one of her most important field notes from this season and explores the freedom that comes from releasing the burden of others' opinions.31:47 – Becoming Reachable to Yourself AgainA powerful closing reflection on thawing, healing, and the realization that growth may not be about becoming someone new—but returning to yourself.A GENTLE INVITATIONThis week, choose one question instead of searching for one answer. Ask yourself: What do I actually need to thrive right now? Resist the urge to solve everything at once. Write down whatever comes up, even if it's incomplete. Sometimes healing isn't found in certainty. Sometimes it's found in creating enough space to hear yourself tell the truth. If this episode resonated with you, consider sharing it with someone who may be navigating their own season of questions. You don't have to have everything figured out to keep moving forward. Sometimes curiosity is enough. SUPPORT THE SHOWLike, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout. Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time. STAY IN TOUCHJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley. Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops. OUR SPONSORSSuper.com: Visit Super.com for more details. Sista Afya Community Care: www.sistaafya.com Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle Our Sponsors: * Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    25 min

  4. May 29

    You Don’t Have to Wait for the Crash-Out: Community Care & Black Women’s Mental Health

    In this Mental Health Month bonus episode, Kelley sits down with Ashlee Edwards, founder and CEO of MindRight, to discuss community-centered mental health support for Black women. Together, they explore why healing shouldn’t begin only in crisis, how community care helps protect our capacity for joy, and what it looks like to build more human-centered systems of support through technology, intention, and connection. Key TakeawaysMental health support should begin before burnout or crisis, not only after things fall apart.Community care is a powerful tool for healing, resilience, and protecting Black women from systems that demand overextension.Technology can support emotional wellness when it is used to deepen human connection rather than replace it.Episode Highlights & Timestamps00:01 – Why Black women deserve support before the “crash-out”Kelley and Ashlee discuss shifting mental health care from crisis intervention to everyday support and community care.05:20 – Protecting our capacity for joyAshlee shares why conversations about mental health must include intergenerational wisdom, joy, and abundance—not just trauma.11:17 – Can technology support healing without replacing humanity?A nuanced conversation about AI, trust, emotional support, and why MindRight prioritizes real humans on the other side of the screen.23:00 – What joy looks like in practiceAshlee reflects on spirituality, nature, intentional living, and the decisions she makes to actively protect her wellbeing.Gentle InvitationThis week, consider one small way you can support your emotional wellbeing before you reach exhaustion. Maybe that looks like asking for support, spending time near something that grounds you, or letting yourself receive care instead of always being the one giving it. The goal isn’t perfection—it’s consistency and remembering that staying human is the work. Connect with Ashlee EdwardsInstagram: @IYA_AshleeMindRight Website: MindRightText MindRight for support: Text 886-886Learn more about MindRight’s community-centered emotional support platform for Black communities and Black women.Support the ShowLike, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout. Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time. Stay in TouchJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley. Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops. Our SponsorsSuper.com: Visit Super.com for more details. Savvy Ladies Free Financial Helpline: https://www.savvyladies.org/ Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle Our Sponsors: * Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    29 min

  5. May 27

    You Cannot Optimize Your Way Out of Grief

    Sometimes grief doesn’t look like falling apart — sometimes it looks like becoming incredibly productive. In this episode, Kelley reflects on the realization that she had been producing healing instead of actually experiencing it, and how years of survival mode, caregiving, medical trauma, and loss shaped her relationship to grief. Through personal storytelling and thoughtful reflection, she explores how Black women are often culturally rewarded for over-functioning while quietly disconnecting from themselves emotionally. This conversation is an invitation to recognize the difference between narrating healing and truly inhabiting it. Kelley also introduces the idea of “the thaw” — the slow process of returning to yourself after prolonged survival mode — and shares why softness, embodiment, and emotional honesty matter now more than ever. KEY TAKEAWAYSGrief doesn’t always look emotional — sometimes it looks like productivity, over-functioning, and survival mode.Many Black women are taught to intellectualize pain and keep moving instead of fully feeling and processing loss.Healing may begin not with becoming “better,” but with becoming reachable to yourself again.EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS & TIMESTAMPS00:01:00 — When Productivity Becomes a Mask for GriefKelley explores the realization that she had been “producing healing” instead of fully experiencing it and reflects on the pressure to turn pain into purpose too quickly. 00:05:00 — The Three Books That Cracked Everything OpenA conversation about art, grief, emotional release, and the moment Kelley realized how long it had been since she truly allowed herself to feel. 00:11:20 — Survival Mode, Trauma, and the Black Woman Freeze ResponseKelley shares the cascade of events from the last several years — illness, caregiving, business instability, and loss — and how prolonged survival mode can disconnect us from ourselves emotionally. 00:19:00 — What “The Thaw” Looks LikeKelley introduces the beginning of her thawing process: slowing down, reconnecting to her body, and learning how to return to herself gently after years of bracing for impact. A GENTLE INVITATIONTake a moment this week to ask yourself: Where have I been over-functioning instead of truly feeling? Maybe your nervous system has been protecting you. Maybe the numbness isn’t failure — maybe it’s survival. Give yourself permission to slow down long enough to notice what your body, heart, or spirit might be trying to say. And if this episode resonated with you, share it with another Black woman who may need the reminder that healing doesn’t have to be optimized to be real. SUPPORT THE SHOWLike, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout. Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time. STAY IN TOUCHJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley. Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops. OUR SPONSORSSuper.com: Visit Super.com for more details. Savvy Ladies Free Financial Helpline: https://www.savvyladies.org/ Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle Our Sponsors: * Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    27 min

  6. May 20

    The Life You Worked For Might Be Exhausting You W/ Zerlina Maxwell

    In this episode, Kelley is joined by political analyst, writer, and speaker Zerlina Maxwell for a powerful conversation about visibility, truth-telling, and navigating the pressure of being a Black woman in public spaces. Together, they explore the emotional toll of constantly having to prove yourself, the importance of boundaries, and what it means to remain grounded while living and working in highly demanding environments. Zerlina shares reflections on ambition, identity, and protecting your peace while still pursuing meaningful work. This conversation is an honest reminder that you do not have to abandon yourself in order to be impactful, successful, or seen. Key TakeawaysVisibility comes with emotional weight. Being seen and heard—especially as a Black woman—often carries pressure, scrutiny, and exhaustion that require intentional care.Boundaries protect your humanity. Rest, limits, and stepping back are necessary practices for sustainability, not signs of weakness.You can pursue impact without self-abandonment. Success and meaningful work do not have to come at the expense of your well-being.Episode Highlights03:08 – Navigating Public Life as a Black WomanZerlina reflects on the challenges of visibility, criticism, and existing authentically in high-pressure spaces.07:42 – The Pressure to Constantly Prove YourselfA deeper discussion about overperformance, perfectionism, and the emotional labor many Black women carry in professional environments.14:19 – Protecting Your Peace With BoundariesKelley and Zerlina explore the importance of rest, emotional boundaries, and creating sustainable rhythms while doing impactful work.21:37 – Redefining Success Beyond ExhaustionA closing reflection on choosing fulfillment, alignment, and self-preservation over constant striving and burnout.A Gentle InvitationIf this episode resonated, take a moment to reflect on where you may be overextending yourself in order to feel worthy, successful, or accepted. Consider one boundary or act of self-preservation that could support you this week. Listen to the full episode, share it with someone navigating pressure or visibility fatigue, and leave a review if this conversation supported you. Choosing yourself alongside your ambitions is part of building a life rooted in sustainability, care, and truth. Connect with ZerlinaRadio Show: Mornings with Zerlina MaxwellInstagram: @ZerlinaMaxwellSubstack: Inner Work Dispatch (available wherever books are sold)Support the ShowLike, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout. Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time. Stay in TouchJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley. Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops. Our SponsorsSavvy Ladies Free Financial Helpline: https://www.savvyladies.org/ Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle Our Sponsors: * Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    49 min

  7. May 12

    Breath, Mindfulness, and Black Joy with Oneika Mays

    In this episode, Kelley sits down with mindfulness teacher and creative visionary Oneika Mays for a grounding conversation about breath, presence, and reclaiming joy as a daily practice. Together, they explore how mindfulness can help Black women reconnect with themselves in a world that often rewards constant output over inner peace. Oneika shares how breathwork, creativity, and intentional pauses have supported her healing journey and helped her cultivate more spaciousness, clarity, and joy. This conversation is a reminder that rest and mindfulness are not luxuries—they are pathways back to yourself. Key TakeawaysBreath creates space for healing. Intentional breathing and mindfulness practices can help regulate your nervous system and reconnect you to the present moment.Joy is a practice, not just a feeling. Cultivating joy often requires intentional choices, boundaries, and moments of pause.Mindfulness supports sustainable living. Slowing down and becoming more present helps you move through life with greater clarity, care, and alignment.Episode Highlights02:16 – Oneika’s Journey Into Mindfulness and Breathwork Oneika shares how mindfulness became an essential part of her healing and self-connection journey.06:48 – Why Black Women Need Space to Pause A thoughtful discussion about the cultural pressures Black women face and the importance of creating room for rest and presence.11:27 – Breath as a Tool for Regulation and Clarity Kelley and Oneika explore how simple breathing practices can support emotional wellness and nervous system care.18:04 – Reclaiming Black Joy Through Presence and Creativity A closing reflection on joy, creativity, and giving yourself permission to experience softness and ease in everyday life.A Gentle InvitationIf this episode resonated, give yourself permission to pause today—even for a few intentional breaths. Notice what shifts when you slow down long enough to reconnect with yourself in the present moment. Listen to the full episode, share it with someone who may need a reminder to breathe and soften, and leave a review if this conversation supported you. Each moment of mindfulness is an act of choosing yourself with care and intention. Connect with OneikaWebsite: Oneika MaysInstagram: @oneikamaysPre-order the book: Sit With Me (available wherever books are sold)Support the ShowLike, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout. Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time. Stay in TouchJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley. Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops. Our SponsorsSavvy Ladies Free Financial Helpline: https://www.savvyladies.org/ Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle Our Sponsors: * Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    50 min

  8. May 6

    You’re Not Stuck, You’re Missing the Right Rooms

    It’s easy to believe you’re stuck—that something about you isn’t working or that you’ve reached your limit. In this episode, Kelley offers a reframe: you may not be stuck at all—you may simply be in the wrong rooms. She explores how environments, communities, and proximity shape what feels possible, visible, and available to you. This conversation invites you to consider how the spaces you occupy influence your growth, your confidence, and your capacity to expand. Sometimes the shift you need isn’t more effort—it’s a different alignment. Key TakeawaysYou may not be stuck—you may be misaligned. The environments you’re in can limit what you see as possible for yourself.Proximity shapes possibility. Being in spaces that reflect your next level can expand your thinking, opportunities, and self-trust.Growth may require new rooms. Choosing environments that support your evolution is a powerful act of self-permission.Episode Highlights02:08 – Rethinking the Feeling of Being “Stuck” Kelley challenges the assumption that lack of progress is personal failure, offering a new perspective rooted in environment and exposure.05:41 – How Your Current Rooms Shape Your Capacity A deeper look at how the people and spaces around you influence your beliefs, ambition, and sense of what’s available.09:33 – The Power of Proximity and Expansion Kelley explores how entering new rooms—physically or energetically—can unlock new opportunities and ways of thinking.14:12 – Giving Yourself Permission to Move Differently A closing reflection on choosing spaces that align with your growth, even when it feels unfamiliar or uncomfortable.A Gentle InvitationIf this episode resonated, reflect on one “room” you’re currently in—whether it’s a relationship, environment, or community. Ask yourself: Does this space support who I’m becoming? Listen to the full episode, share it with someone who may be questioning their next step, and leave a review if this conversation supported you. Expanding your environment can be a powerful step toward expanding your life—with more ease, clarity, and alignment. Support the ShowLike, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout. Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time. Stay in TouchJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley. Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops. Our SponsorsSavvy Ladies Free Financial Helpline: https://www.savvyladies.org/ Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle Our Sponsors: * Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    24 min
See All (498)

4.7
out of 5
762 Ratings

About

Black Girl Burnout is a podcast about burnout, ambition, care, and what it actually takes to build a life that feels good to live—not just impressive from the outside.  Hosted by Kelley Bonner, the show explores how burnout takes hold, why ambition doesn’t need to be abandoned but redesigned, and how joy, rest, and gentleness can coexist with meaningful work and forward movement. Through reflection, practical insight, and carefully chosen conversations, Black Girl Burnout offers both grounding and direction, helping listeners feel seen and take action toward lives that are sustainable, intentional, and their own.

Information

  • Creator
    Kelley Bonner
  • Years Active
    2021 - 2026
  • Episodes
    498
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Black Girl Burnout
  • Show Website
    Black Girl Burnout

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