Message in the Middle: Midlife Women, Reinvention & Personal Growth

Marianne DeMello-Smith
  • 5.0 (34)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

Message in the Middle is a podcast for women navigating the challenges, transitions, and reinventions that often come with midlife.  Hosted by Marianne DeMello-Smith, each episode explores the messy, meaningful moments that shape who we become. Through honest conversations with experts, authors, thought leaders, and everyday women, you'll discover practical insights, inspiring stories, and new perspectives on what it means to grow through life's most difficult seasons. Whether you're facing a career change, caregiving responsibilities, health challenges, grief, relationship shifts, menopause, identity changes, or simply wondering what's next, Message in the Middle offers encouragement, wisdom, and real-world strategies to help you move forward with greater confidence and purpose. Together, we'll explore resilience, personal growth, self-discovery, emotional well-being, and the power of turning life's messes into meaningful midlife messages. Because midlife isn't the end of your story. It may just be the beginning of your next chapter.

  1. 1d ago

    Rebuilding a Life You Didn’t Choose

    There are some life changes we choose. And then there are the ones that choose us. In January 2024, Jennifer White woke from a coma following brain tumor surgery and found herself facing a life she barely recognized. A retired registered nurse, Jennifer knew the healthcare system from one side of the bed. Suddenly, she was experiencing it from the other. She had to relearn how to walk, think and talk. Some memories returned slowly through writing. Others may never return. And while many of the changes were visible during her recovery, others remain hidden: depression, exhaustion, difficulty finding words and the emotional weight of rebuilding a life she never planned to have. But somewhere in that recovery, something unexpected happened. Jennifer began to reinvent herself. Writing became a way to reconnect with memories, discover new interests and make sense of who she was becoming. Today, she writes medical thrillers and children's books, drawing from both her experience as a nurse and her experience as a patient. In this episode of Message in the Middle, Jennifer and I talk about what it really means to rebuild your identity after life changes without your permission. We talk about grief, resilience, invisible struggles, the difference between surviving and becoming, and what happens when you finally stop trying to get back to the person you were. Because sometimes the goal isn't to get your old life back. Sometimes it's to discover what comes next. Connect with Jennifer:   https://www.jennywhite.cahttps://www.molsonjennyadventures.ca Connect with Marianne: Website:  Message In The Middle with MarianneMessage In the Middle Facebook Group:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/422430469323847/YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/@MessageInTheMiddle/playlistsLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marianne-demello-smith-678b9966Email:  Contact | Message In The Middle with Marianne Subscribe to Message In the Middle: Apple PodcastsSpotifyYouTubeLeave Us a Review: If you enjoyed today’s episode, please leave a review and share your favorite takeaway. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners and bring you even more valuable content. Keep the conversation going - Join us for more insightful conversations in the Message in the Middle Private Facebook Community & subscribe to Message in the Middle podcas...

    Rebuilding a Life You Didn’t Choose

  2. Sep 26

    When Life Is Lifing: How We Keep Going Anyway

    Sometimes life isn’t falling apart because of one big thing. It’s just… a lot. The news feels relentless. The world feels increasingly complicated. Family dynamics can be difficult. Aging parents bring a whole new set of responsibilities. Health concerns, work, relationships, and the everyday stuff of life keep piling on. And somehow, we’re still supposed to keep going. In this solo episode of Message in the Middle, Marianne talks about what it feels like when life is really, truly “lifing.” Not from a place of having all the answers, but from the middle of her own messy, complicated season of life. She reflects on the things we can’t control, the difference between what is ours to carry and what isn’t, and why sometimes the best thing we can do is stop trying to solve everything at once and focus on the next right thing. She also talks about something that has been grounding her lately: intentionally noticing the good. A good cup of coffee. A conversation with a friend. A hug. A laugh with her grandchildren. A quiet moment when the sun comes out after a rainy day. Because the hard things don’t disappear when we notice the good. But the good can keep the hard things from becoming the only things we see. If life has been lifing for you lately too, this episode is a reminder that you don’t have to figure everything out today. Sometimes keeping going looks like taking care of yourself, loving the people you love, letting go of what you can’t control, noticing the small moments that make you smile, and simply taking the next step. One day at a time. One small moment at a time. One deep breath at a time. Connect with Marianne: Website:  Message In The Middle with MarianneMessage In the Middle Facebook Group:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/422430469323847/YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/@MessageInTheMiddle/playlistsLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marianne-demello-smith-678b9966Email:  Contact | Message In The Middle with Marianne Subscribe to Message In the Middle: Apple PodcastsSpotifyYouTubeLeave Us a Review: If you enjoyed today’s episode, please leave a review and share your favorite takeaway. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners and bring you even more valuable content. Keep the conversation going - Join us for more insightful conversations in the Message in the Middle Private Facebook Community & subscribe to Message in the Middle podcas...

  3. Sep 19

    Can You Create a New Marriage Without Finding a New Spouse?

    What if your marriage doesn't need a new person? What if it needs two people willing to become new versions of themselves, intentionally choosing each other, over and over?   That's the question at the heart of my conversation with Kameran Alareqi, a Gottman Certified marriage coach, host of the Married and Connected podcast, and founder of the Recognizing Potential Coaching Program. Kameran doesn't talk about marriage from a textbook. She's lived through infidelity, infertility, divorce, and ultimately reconciliation with her husband. And what she discovered is that rebuilding a marriage isn't necessarily about going back to what you had. Sometimes it's about creating something neither of you has ever had before. In this conversation, we go much deeper than communication tips and marriage advice. We talk about identity, childhood patterns, pride, friendship, resentment, humility, and what it really takes to change the person you're bringing into a relationship. We also explore a question I think many people quietly wrestle with: When is fighting for your marriage an act of courage, and when does it become self-abandonment? Kameran shares what reconciliation actually required, how she learned to take responsibility for her own transformation, and what it can look like to fall in love with the same person again, not by recreating the old marriage, but by intentionally building a new one. If you've ever wondered whether people can really change, whether a disconnected marriage can become a connected one again, or whether it's possible to find your way back to the person sitting across the table, this conversation is for you. Because sometimes the question isn't, "Do I need a different marriage?" It's, "Am I willing to become the person who can build the marriage I want?" Connect with Kameran: IG YouTube  Skool Community Book- Connected To Me: The Blueprint Substack Connect with Marianne: Website:  Message In The Middle with MarianneMessage In the Middle Facebook Group:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/422430469323847/YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/@MessageInTheMiddle/playlistsLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marianne-demello-smith-678b9966Email:  Contact | Message In The Middle with Marianne Subscribe to Message In the Middle: Apple PodcastsSpotifyYouTubeLeave Us a Review: If you enjoyed today’s episode, please leave a review and share your favorite takeaway. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners and bring you even more valuable content. Keep the conversation going - Join us for more insightful conversations in the Message in the Middle Private Facebook Community & subscribe to Message in the Middle podcas...

    Can You Create a New Marriage Without Finding a New Spouse?

  4. Sep 12

    When Anxiety Shrinks Your Life: How to Take It Back

    Anxiety doesn't always arrive with racing thoughts or panic attacks. Sometimes it shows up as perfectionism. People pleasing. Constant overthinking. Staying busy so you never have to slow down long enough to notice how exhausted you've become. It quietly convinces us to stop taking chances, stop trusting ourselves, and settle for surviving instead of truly living. This week on Message in the Middle, Marianne sits down with registered psychotherapist, internationally certified EMDR therapist, expressive arts educator, and author Elke Scholz for an honest conversation about reclaiming your life from anxiety. Drawing from more than thirty years of clinical experience and her own personal journey with anxiety, Elke shares practical, compassionate tools that help people move from fear toward confidence without waiting until anxiety disappears. Together they explore: • The subtle signs of anxiety many people never recognize • Why workplace stress feels heavier than ever • How overthinking, perfectionism, and people pleasing often mask anxiety • Why listening to your body may be the first step toward healing • How creativity can unlock healing in ways words sometimes cannot • Daily practices that build resilience and emotional freedom • Why you don't need more time. You need more life inside the time you already have. If you've been waiting until you feel less anxious before living the life you really want, this conversation is your reminder that you don't have to wait. Connect with Elke: Website: www.elkescholz.comhttps://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYf99EPFC3m01ft5ugIIC-ghttps://www.linkedin.com/in/elke-scholz-a2aa6b17/https://www.facebook.com/elke.scholz.71https://www.instagram.com/lovingyourlife1?igsh=M3hpbWNsb2R2Y29l Connect with Marianne: Website:  Message In The Middle with MarianneMessage In the Middle Facebook Group:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/422430469323847/YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/@MessageInTheMiddle/playlistsLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marianne-demello-smith-678b9966Email:  Contact | Message In The Middle with Marianne Subscribe to Message In the Middle: Apple PodcastsSpotifyYouTubeLeave Us a Review: If you enjoyed today’s episode, please leave a review and share your favorite takeaway. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners and bring you even more valuable content. Keep the conversation going - Join us for more insightful conversations in the Message in the Middle Private Facebook Community & subscribe to Message in the Middle podcas...

    When Anxiety Shrinks Your Life: How to Take It Back

  5. Sep 5

    What No One Tells You About Life After Work

    We spend years preparing for retirement. We save, invest, plan for healthcare, and think about how we'll spend our time. But what about preparing for who we'll be when the work is gone? What no one tells you about life after work is that retirement isn't simply a change in schedule. It's a change in identity. When the meetings end, the calendar goes quiet, and the role you've spent decades becoming disappears, the freedom you imagined can sometimes feel surprisingly unfamiliar. In this episode of Message in the Middle, I sit down with Cheryl Fimbel, who spent forty-five years leading healthcare organizations through major change before experiencing an unexpected career transition of her own just before retirement. That experience led Cheryl to explore the emotional side of retirement that financial planning often overlooks. We talk about why the first ninety days matter so much, why high achievers can struggle with unstructured time, how grief can show up even when retirement is a choice, and why purpose isn't something you discover overnight. We also explore emotional readiness, relationships, routine, community, and what it takes to begin building a meaningful life after work. Because the question isn't simply, "What will I do when I retire?" It's also, "Who am I when I'm no longer doing the work that defined me?" Whether retirement is years away or already part of your story, this conversation offers a different way to think about the transition and a reminder that the next chapter isn't about replacing who you were. It's about making space for who you're becoming. Connect with Cheryl: Crown Years Media Website: https://crownyearsmedia.com The Hidden Side of Retirement Book on Amazon: https://a.co/d/08hFM0IJ Connect with Marianne: Website:  Message In The Middle with MarianneMessage In the Middle Facebook Group:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/422430469323847/YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/@MessageInTheMiddle/playlistsLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marianne-demello-smith-678b9966Email:  Contact | Message In The Middle with Marianne Subscribe to Message In the Middle: Apple PodcastsSpotifyYouTubeLeave Us a Review: If you enjoyed today’s episode, please leave a review and share your favorite takeaway. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners and bring you even more valuable content. Keep the conversation going - Join us for more insightful conversations in the Message in the Middle Private Facebook Community & subscribe to Message in the Middle podcas...

    What No One Tells You About Life After Work

  6. Aug 29

    Midlife Reinvention, Inner Wisdom, Authenticity and Aging Well with Kathy Robinson

    Episode Description What happens when you've achieved everything you thought you wanted, only to discover there's something deeper calling you? For more than thirty years, Kathy Robinson built an impressive corporate career, rising to become Chief Audit Executive and Chief Risk Officer at a Fortune 250 company. Then, at the height of her success, she made the courageous decision to walk away. What followed wasn't the end of her story. It was the beginning of a profound transformation. In this thoughtful conversation, Kathy shares the inspiration behind her new book, Walking with the Sage: A Story of Leaving Everything to Find More, and explores why midlife isn't a crisis to survive, but an invitation to become more fully ourselves. Together, we talk about identity, reinvention, aging with intention, and the wisdom that often emerges when we're willing to slow down and listen. If you've ever wondered whether your best years are behind you, or if there's still another chapter waiting to be written, this episode offers hope, practical insight, and a gentle reminder that the answers you're searching for may already be within you. In this episode, you'll discover: • Why major life transitions are invitations for growth rather than signs of failure • What it means to be "in the goo" and why the messy middle is where transformation begins • How nature and stillness help us reconnect with our inner wisdom • The difference between living as a warrior and living as a sage • Practical ways to navigate uncertainty with greater self-trust and authenticity • Why your most meaningful chapter may still be ahead Whether you're navigating a career change, an empty nest, retirement, or simply feeling called toward something more meaningful, this conversation will leave you feeling grounded, encouraged, and inspired to trust your own path. Because sometimes the bravest journey isn't climbing higher. It's having the courage to come home to yourself. Connect with Kathy:  https://athenawellness.com/ Free book companion that offers three wellness practices: https://athenawellness.com/sage Connect with Marianne: Website:  Message In The Middle with MarianneMessage In the Middle Facebook Group:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/422430469323847/YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/@MessageInTheMiddle/playlistsLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marianne-demello-smith-678b9966Email:  Contact | Message In The Middle with Marianne Subscribe to Message In the Middle: Apple PodcastsSpotifyYouTubeLeave Us a Review: If you enjoyed today’s episode, please leave a review and share your favorite takeaway. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners and bring you even more valuable content. Keep the conversation going - Join us for more insightful conversations in the Message in the Middle Private Facebook Community & subscribe to Message in the Middle podcas...

    Midlife Reinvention, Inner Wisdom, Authenticity and Aging Well with Kathy Robinson

  7. Aug 22

    What Happens When the Strategies That Made You Successful Stop Working?

    For years, Nancy Deyo lived by the same rules many of us have been taught to follow: work hard, stay disciplined, push through discomfort, and keep going. Those strategies helped her build a successful career as a Silicon Valley CEO. But after a medical crisis on Mount Kilimanjaro left her living with chronic pain, years of misdiagnosis, opioid dependence, and an entirely different reality than the one she had planned, she was forced to ask a difficult question: What do we do when the strategies that made us successful stop working? In this deeply honest conversation, Nancy shares what it was like to grieve the loss of the life she expected, navigate years of being told nothing was wrong, redefine resilience, and learn that perseverance doesn't always mean pushing harder. Together, we explore what it means to stop fighting for the person you used to be and begin building a life that honors who you are now. Whether you're navigating chronic illness, burnout, caregiving, grief, retirement, or simply discovering that the old rules no longer fit, this episode is an invitation to consider a different path forward. Because sometimes resilience isn't about enduring more. Sometimes it's about learning to listen. In this episode, we discuss: • Living with chronic pain and medical uncertainty • The emotional impact of being dismissed or misunderstood • Opioid dependence and recovery • Grieving a former version of yourself • Acceptance versus giving up • Slowing down and redefining success • Reinvention in midlife • What resilience looks like when pushing harder no longer works • Lessons from Nancy's forthcoming memoir, Perilous Ascent Connect with Nancy: Substack Life Inside Pain: https://nancydeyo.substack.comWebsite: https://nancydeyo.com Connect with Marianne: Website:  Message In The Middle with MarianneMessage In the Middle Facebook Group:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/422430469323847/YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/@MessageInTheMiddle/playlistsLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marianne-demello-smith-678b9966Email:  Contact | Message In The Middle with Marianne Subscribe to Message In the Middle: Apple PodcastsSpotifyYouTubeLeave Us a Review: If you enjoyed today’s episode, please leave a review and share your favorite takeaway. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners and bring you even more valuable content. Keep the conversation going - Join us for more insightful conversations in the Message in the Middle Private Facebook Community & subscribe to Message in the Middle podcas...

    What Happens When the Strategies That Made You Successful Stop Working?

  8. Aug 15

    What Remains When Memory Fades? Alzheimer's, Caregiving, and the Legacy of Storytelling

    What happens when the person who once cared for you begins to need your care? For many people in midlife, one of the most unexpected transitions isn't retirement, an empty nest, or a career change. It's becoming the caregiver for an aging parent. In this deeply moving episode of Message in the Middle, Marianne sits down with psychologist, memoirist, and poet Sarah Vosburgh to discuss her memoir, Who Will Name the Bees?, a powerful reflection on her mother's journey through Alzheimer's disease and her own experience navigating the emotional realities of caregiving. Together they explore: • The moment a daughter becomes a caregiver • The complicated emotions of loving someone through Alzheimer's • Guilt, grief, and the weight of making difficult decisions • The role reversal that happens when parents begin to depend on their children • What remains when memory begins to fade • The invisible emotional labor caregivers carry • How writing became part of Sarah's healing journey • Resilience, family dynamics, and finding meaning through loss Through lyrical storytelling and honest reflection, Sarah offers a compassionate look at one of life's most challenging experiences while reminding us that connection, love, and identity often endure long after memories begin to disappear. Whether you're caring for an aging parent, grieving a loved one, navigating dementia or Alzheimer's, or simply trying to make sense of a changing family relationship, this conversation will leave you feeling seen, understood, and a little less alone. Connect with Sarah Vosburgh: Website: https://www.SarahVosburgh.comFacebook: http://www.facebook.com/SarahVosburghAuthorInstagram: http://www.instagram.com/scvosburghX: http://x.com/SCVosburghTikTok: http://tiktok.com/SarahVosburghAuthorAmazon: https://www.amazon.com/author/sarahvosburgh Connect with Marianne: Website:  Message In The Middle with MarianneMessage In the Middle Facebook Group:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/422430469323847/YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/@MessageInTheMiddle/playlistsLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marianne-demello-smith-678b9966Email:  Contact | Message In The Middle with Marianne Subscribe to Message In the Middle: Apple PodcastsSpotifyYouTubeLeave Us a Review: If you enjoyed today’s episode, please leave a review and share your favorite takeaway. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners and bring you even more valuable content. Keep the conversation going - Join us for more insightful conversations in the Message in the Middle Private Facebook Community & subscribe to Message in the Middle podcas...

    What Remains When Memory Fades? Alzheimer's, Caregiving, and the Legacy of Storytelling
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About

Message in the Middle is a podcast for women navigating the challenges, transitions, and reinventions that often come with midlife.  Hosted by Marianne DeMello-Smith, each episode explores the messy, meaningful moments that shape who we become. Through honest conversations with experts, authors, thought leaders, and everyday women, you'll discover practical insights, inspiring stories, and new perspectives on what it means to grow through life's most difficult seasons. Whether you're facing a career change, caregiving responsibilities, health challenges, grief, relationship shifts, menopause, identity changes, or simply wondering what's next, Message in the Middle offers encouragement, wisdom, and real-world strategies to help you move forward with greater confidence and purpose. Together, we'll explore resilience, personal growth, self-discovery, emotional well-being, and the power of turning life's messes into meaningful midlife messages. Because midlife isn't the end of your story. It may just be the beginning of your next chapter.

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