The UnMothered Podcast

Phylis Mantelli
  • 5.0 (26)
  • Relationships
  • Updated Weekly

When life gives you a toxic mother, what do you do? You listen, learn, and change your direction! I’m Phylis Mantelli, author of the book “UnMothered: Life With A Mom Who Couldn’t Love Me.” This podcast is a place for mentoring and encouragement as we navigate the complexities of toxic parent relationships. Join me as I share my journey and invite God-filled guests to discuss emotional healing, overcoming childhood trauma, and personal growth. Together, we'll explore new thoughts and patterns to transform our lives. Hear stories from women who have walked similar paths and gain wisdom and support on your journey. Let’s find our way to becoming who we are meant to be, no matter where we started. Tune in for stories of empowerment, mental health support, and lots of love as we heal and grow together.

  1. 4d ago

    Growing Up Without a Mom or Mother Figure with Kelly Miller | Episode 139

    Today we are talking with Kelly Miller! We are marking this a two-part episode, so stay tuned for part two coming next Monday. Kelly is an author, health coach, marketing strategist, and lifelong believer that everything you want in life starts with your fork. She’s the creator of Healthy Cooking 101 and The Eat, Dream, Do Guide, built from years of personal testing and teaching women how to make real food and healthy cooking fit into real life. After navigating breast cancer in her 40s, Kelly’s belief that food is foundational became more than a philosophy. It became part of her toolkit for navigating life’s hardest seasons, reinforcing the importance of how we feed ourselves, make room for ourselves, and keep going after what matters. Now, she’s bringing those worlds together through Our Rooted Kitchen, a new monthly mini-cookbook subscription and community for busy women, solopreneurs, and business owners who are ready to put themselves back on the to-do list and feed themselves well. It’s designed to help women put the Food First mindset into action, building the energy and capacity to feel good in their bodies while creating lives they’re excited to wake up to. Her philosophy is simple: Eat first. Then dream. Then go do the dang thing. Simple, practical, and backed by science. Connect with Kelly Website: HealthCoachKel.com Instagram: @HealthCoachKel Facebook: @HealthCoachKel YouTube: @HealthCoachKel LinkedIn: Kelly Miller Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/ Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/ Join the conversation in my private community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheUnmotheredCommunity Like to watch your podcasts? We are on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/@phylismantelli/podcasts 💖 If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend who needs to hear this message. And don’t forget to leave a review—it helps more people find this podcast! *Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or counselor.

  2. Aug 17

    A Conversation Around Forgiveness and Healing with Amy Smyth Miller | Episode 138

    Let’s dive into a great conversation around forgiveness and healing with Amy Smyth Miller. Amy is a nationally recognized educator with a bachelor’s degree in special education and a master’s in counseling. She recently retired after a 30-year career in public education and lives in northern Washington State with her husband, “Captain Crusty,” her adult son with special needs, and her rescue dachshund, Oscar. Her essays and poetry have appeared in The Muleskinner Journal, Women on Writing, Persimmon Tree, The Healing and CPTSD Chronicles, As It Ought to Be Digital Magazine, and Whatcom Writes Anthology: Legacies. Her forthcoming memoir, HOME: A Memoir of Family Forgiveness, and Healing from Complex PTSD will be released on September 15th, 2026 and is available for presale wherever books are sold. You can visit her via the web: Website: www.amysmythmiller.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amysmythmiller Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amy_smyth_miller/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amy_smyth_miller Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/ Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/ Join the conversation in my private community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheUnmotheredCommunity Like to watch your podcasts? We are on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/@phylismantelli/podcasts 💖 If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend who needs to hear this message. And don’t forget to leave a review—it helps more people find this podcast! *Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or counselor.

  3. Aug 10

    Why UnMothered Women Pick the Wrong Men | Episode 137

    You deserve to have a happy, stable relationship with someone who honors your worth. But, do you have a fractured idea of what you deserve from a relationship because you witnessed your mom in her relationships?  Picking the wrong partner has a lot to do with how you witnessed your single mom (or dad) relate in their own dating life. The topic is an important subject if you are a single woman currently in the dating pool of life!  Let’s find out how to change the bad habits or advice you may have learned from your toxic mom.  My book, ‘UnMothered No More’ is now live on Amazon! Go check it out today: https://a.co/d/06GruRTZ Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/ Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/ Join the conversation in my private community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheUnmotheredCommunity Like to watch your podcasts? We are on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/@phylismantelli/podcasts 💖 If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend who needs to hear this message. And don’t forget to leave a review—it helps more people find this podcast! *Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or counselor.

  4. Aug 3

    When a Mom Loses a Child | Episode 136

    How does a mom talk about the child she had lost? This can be a touchy subject, but it is near to my heart since I've lost a child. I wanted to share with you how I navigated it with my girls. What happens when you haven’t talked about it and now your adult children have questions? Or have they written their own story around it? Only a mom who has lost a child knows this ache and can understand, but we can address it with empathy and compassion and honesty if we are ready. My book, ‘UnMothered No More’ is now live on Amazon! Go check it out today: https://a.co/d/06GruRTZ Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/ Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/ Join the conversation in my private community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheUnmotheredCommunity Like to watch your podcasts? We are on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/@phylismantelli/podcasts 💖 If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend who needs to hear this message. And don’t forget to leave a review—it helps more people find this podcast! *Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or counselor.

  5. Jul 27

    Most Downloaded Episodes | An Emotionally Immature Mom vs. A Narcissistic Mom; What Is The Difference? | Episode 72

    We are still on our summer break! Stay tuned for new episodes coming back next Monday. Chat more soon, peeps! Check out my latest book:  ‘UnMothered No More’ is now live on Amazon! Go check it out today: https://a.co/d/06GruRTZ Over the past few years, I’ve been studying the different types of toxic moms. Imagine my surprise when I started studying about toxic parenting and realized my mom was emotionally immature AND narcissistic!  I never knew what to expect from my mom from one day to the next. It was exhausting trying to figure it all out. It made so much sense, but also it hurt to see that her characteristics were so manipulative.  As I look through each of these problems, I have a story to match each of them. I bet you do too. I pray you find a way to keep working through this and start making change worthy behaviors where you don’t get bogged down with your mom’s immature, toxic behavior.  Know that immature parents have been raised by immature parents. This has to stop with you! You must be the chainbreaker in your family! God has given you this assignment, do it well and show the family you raise that those kinds of behaviors will NOT happen in your home. Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/ Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/ Join the conversation in my private community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheUnmotheredCommunity Like to watch your podcasts? We are on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/@phylismantelli/podcasts 💖 If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend who needs to hear this message. And don’t forget to leave a review—it helps more people find this podcast! *Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or counselor.

  6. Jul 20

    Most Downloaded Episodes | Are You The ‘Black Sheep’ Of The Family Or The Truth-Teller? | Episode 62

    We are still on our summer break! Stay tuned for new episodes coming back in August. Chat more soon, peeps! Check out my latest book:  ‘UnMothered No More’ is now live on Amazon! Go check it out today: https://a.co/d/06GruRTZ How do you define the black sheep in the family? Has this label been placed on you because you don’t abide by the dysfunction in your family? There is a difference between being the troublemaker or the truth-teller. If you are just trying to survive in a highly abusive family situation, you learn to fight and stand on your own.  Do you always make the right decisions? Not always, but who does when they are young? When I think about how we get labeled as troubled or a hard child, I think we should look deeper into the family dynamics instead of automatically blaming the child. So what can we do if we are the one that has always been labeled in this way? As I’ve said before, journal out any thoughts or struggles you still may have regarding this issue. You might be surprised at how much stuff comes up. Remember, you are not what other people tell you; you are who God has said you are.  He has a purpose and a plan for you, even if you have to walk through rough waters to get there. Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/ Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/ Join the conversation in my private community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheUnmotheredCommunity Like to watch your podcasts? We are on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/@phylismantelli/podcasts 💖 If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend who needs to hear this message. And don’t forget to leave a review—it helps more people find this podcast! *Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or counselor.

  7. Jul 13

    Most Downloaded Episodes | Has Your Past Caused You To Grow Up Being Afraid? | Episode 108

    We are still on our summer break! Stay tuned for new episodes coming back in August. Chat more soon, peeps! Check out my latest book:  ‘UnMothered No More’ is now live on Amazon! Go check it out today: https://a.co/d/06GruRTZ Do you get scared or anxious from ordinary things in your life?  Can it be tied to past traumatic events? Sometimes the things we react to now are a direct result of the trauma we have gone through as children.  We tend to fall into patterns to keep ourselves safe, or so we think. It can keep us prisoners in our own bodies.  Learn how to recognize some reactions and start the process of digging through to get to a healthier place. Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/ Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/ Join the conversation in my private community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheUnmotheredCommunity Like to watch your podcasts? We are on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/@phylismantelli/podcasts 💖 If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend who needs to hear this message. And don’t forget to leave a review—it helps more people find this podcast! *Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or counselor.

  8. Jul 6

    Most Downloaded Episodes | How To Handle Your Toxic Mom & Her Relationship As A Grandmother | Episode 77

    We are still on our summer break! Stay tuned for new episodes coming back in August. Chat more soon, peeps! Check out my latest book: ‘UnMothered No More’ is now live on Amazon! Go check it out today: https://a.co/d/06GruRTZ This week's episode came as an anonymous request through my weekly newsletter, Tuesday Talks With Phylis (link in bio to sign up or head to my website!). Let’s talk about the do’s and don’ts of letting our children be a part of our mothers’ lives and what do you do when your toxic mom wants to be a part of your children’s lives? Can we let them have a relationship with their grandchildren even though we have a dysfunctional one? If there is a special relationship that your mom has with her grandchildren, you can set a boundary around it. But if she isn’t respectful of your rules or intentions then I think you need to set some limits. Listen to your kids! If they are not comfortable being around her, respect that too. Your children will find their voice if they feel safe with you and know how to speak up. Don’t use your kids as pawns in this family game. Listen and watch.  We are not trying to be cold mamas that just cut off our moms for no reason. There is no easy answer to each individual situation, and I won’t be someone who will say “Do it this way or else!”  What I know about God is that He will take things we don’t understand and do what he plans all along. We can’t be in control of every little thing, but we can have hope that maybe our children’s relationships can be beautiful. If not, then we can be the safety for them that they need to stay away from someone who could hurt them.  The choice is ours, with prayer, common sense, and thought. I’m praying you find peace with all of this! Let’s Connect!Follow me on IG: The UnMothered Podcast https://www.instagram.com/theunmotheredpodcast/ Phylis Mantelli’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/phylismantelli/ Join the conversation in my private community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheUnmotheredCommunity Like to watch your podcasts? We are on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/@phylismantelli/podcasts 💖 If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend who needs to hear this message. And don’t forget to leave a review—it helps more people find this podcast! *Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist or counselor.

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About

When life gives you a toxic mother, what do you do? You listen, learn, and change your direction! I’m Phylis Mantelli, author of the book “UnMothered: Life With A Mom Who Couldn’t Love Me.” This podcast is a place for mentoring and encouragement as we navigate the complexities of toxic parent relationships. Join me as I share my journey and invite God-filled guests to discuss emotional healing, overcoming childhood trauma, and personal growth. Together, we'll explore new thoughts and patterns to transform our lives. Hear stories from women who have walked similar paths and gain wisdom and support on your journey. Let’s find our way to becoming who we are meant to be, no matter where we started. Tune in for stories of empowerment, mental health support, and lots of love as we heal and grow together.

Information

  • Creator
    Phylis Mantelli
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2026
  • Episodes
    161
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Phylis Mantelli
  • Show Website
    The UnMothered Podcast

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