Sex and the Psyche

Kim Kaplan Productions

Sex and the Psyche is hosted by clinical sex therapists, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz. Married with two children, Jenni and Daniel, take listeners behind the scenes on how they talk shop on a deeper level as they conceptualize the intersection of relationships, sex, and psychology. With over 16 years of helping couples and individuals enhance and optimize their sexual function, pleasure, and knowledge of human sexuality, Sex and the Psyche covers the issues that affect most everyone from desire discrepancy, erectile issues, painful sex, porn obsessions, premature and delayed ejaculation, and healing from affairs among many other topics.  As a husband-wife team and co-directors of 'The Intimacy Institute for Sex and Relationship Therapy', Jenni and Daniel share their expertise from real life scenarios, bringing a unique angle to understanding relationships while offering listeners helpful communication skills through thoughtful and intelligent conversations designed to help connect the more complicated dots for manifesting a more satisfying and sustainable sex life.  Links:  drjenniskyler.substack.com The Intimacy Institute Roadmap to Intimacy online courses  

  1. 4d ago

    EP38: The Medical Celebrity We Cant Wait to Interview - Plus the Full Definition of Sexuality Nobody Ever Gives You

    Before welcoming renowned sexual medicine physician and women’s health advocate Dr. Rachel Rubin to Sex and the Psyche, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz explore why understanding our sexuality requires looking beyond what happens in the bedroom. They discuss the importance of a biopsychosocial approach to sexual wellness, recognizing how our biology, psychology, relationships, and social experiences all influence our ability to experience intimacy, arousal, desire, and pleasure. Dr. Jenni shares why she values Rachel’s commitment to collaborative care between medical professionals and sex therapists, emphasizing that meaningful progress often happens when physical and psychological factors are addressed together. From hormones and perimenopause to anxiety, body image, attachment, and past experiences, the conversation highlights how interconnected these influences can be- and why patients deserve care that considers the whole person. Daniel offers a compelling perspective on the relationship between fear and sexual functioning, drawing on his EMT training to explain how the body’s stress response can interfere with physiological processes, including erectile function. Together, he and Jenni explore how anxiety, fear of rejection, concerns about body image, or past violations can affect our ability to feel safe, connected, aroused, and present during intimacy. The conversation also challenges listeners to become stronger advocates for their own sexual health. Knowing what questions to ask, seeking appropriate medical and therapeutic support, and continuing to advocate for answers that feel meaningful and individualized can open the door to a deeper understanding of our bodies and experiences. This thoughtful prelude to the upcoming conversation with Dr. Rachel Rubin invites listeners to get curious about the connections between the physical and psychological dimensions of sexuality and to recognize that sexual wellness is far more complex, personal, and multidimensional than many of us have been taught. Learn more about Dr. Jenni and Daniel Dr. Jenni Substack   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    EP38: The Medical Celebrity We Cant Wait to Interview - Plus the Full Definition of Sexuality Nobody Ever Gives You
  2. Oct 21

    EP37: Make Sexual Wellness as Mainstream as Matcha! Meet the Founders of Mila

    What does it take to build the sexual wellness brand that women actually deserve — and why has it taken this long? In this episode, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz sit down with Ada Trujillo and Kim Aviv, co-founders of Mila- an intimate wellness brand that is doing something the category has never quite managed: making pleasure feel as intentional, beautiful, and culturally fluent as skincare. Ada is a former professional basketball player turned CPG marketing powerhouse who has raised millions for major consumer brands. Kim is a finance and operations expert with deep startup experience. Neither came from the sexual wellness world. Both felt deeply underserved by it-and decided to fix it. At the center of their product line is the Aura, a pending-patent pleasure device that layers four distinct functionalities to map the full arc of female arousal, not just the finish line. Warmth. Orbital massage. Vibration. Suction. Designed to be explored, not just used. Beautiful enough to live on your nightstand. Quiet enough that nobody walking in would know what it is. But this conversation goes well beyond the product. Jenni and Daniel bring their combined 17 years of clinical practice to a conversation about why sensuality is a lost language, why lube is non-negotiable at every age, why men feel excluded from women’s pleasure and how a toy can change that, and why the lowest common denominator approach to self-pleasure is costing women a whole range of experiences they never knew were available to them. Ada and Kim share what it is like to pitch sexual wellness to skeptical investors, and how a $1 million raise became $2.5 million. They talk about what is coming next, including a product for couples, and why they believe sexual wellness belongs on the same shelf as matcha and Pilates. Check out Mila! Mila Instagram Mila TikTok Mila Facebook Learn more about Sex and the Psyche Watch this episode on YouTube Follow on Instagram and Facebook  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    EP37: Make Sexual Wellness as Mainstream as Matcha! Meet the Founders of Mila
  3. Oct 7

    EP36: EJ and Tarah Part 2 - From Wanting To Run Away in the Minivan, to Having Sex in it!

    What happens when a couple has spent years working through trauma, parenting, mismatched desire, rejection, and the complicated realities of long-term partnership- and finally reaches a place where intimacy can feel playful again? In Part 2 of our conversation with Tarah and EJ, we go deeper into the intimate side of long-term relationships: eroticism, desire, sexual shame, emotional safety, and the patience it can take to rebuild connection. Tarah and EJ open up about their own journey through periods when sex became tense and even frightening, and how building emotional safety eventually created room for curiosity, playfulness, and a renewed sense of intimacy. We talk about why eroticism isn't necessarily about fantasy or sexual novelty, but can begin with something much more fundamental: feeling safe enough to be fully yourself with your partner. We explore what happens when one partner carries sexual trauma while the other experiences a deep hunger for connection, and why patience, boundaries, vulnerability, and personal responsibility are essential when those needs collide. The conversation also tackles rejection and how differently it can land on each side of a relationship. From pregnancy and changing desire to the painful “don't even touch me” moments, we explore how learning to communicate honestly can transform rejection from a source of tension into an opportunity for deeper understanding. And then comes one of the most powerful revelations of the episode: sometimes you have to genuinely accept that a relationship might not work in order to freely choose to stay. Letting go of the fear of losing the relationship can remove the pressure, create space for honesty, and allow two people to choose each other from clarity rather than fear. It's a candid conversation about the reality of long-term love, and a reminder that the work isn't a sign that something is wrong with a relationship. Sometimes, the work is the relationship.   Tarah and EJ Links:  Website: https://relationshiprenovation.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationshiprenovationcounseling Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relationship_renovation/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfb8I3evBi7aZcVnmvN_yPw Learn more about Sex and the Psyche Watch this episode on YouTube Follow on Instagram and Facebook  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    EP36: EJ and Tarah Part 2 - From Wanting To Run Away in the Minivan, to Having Sex in it!
  4. Sep 30

    EP 35: Your Partner is Your Greatest Teacher – Even When You Want to Run Away in a Minivan!

    What happens when the person you love most is also the person who can trigger your deepest wounds? In this episode of Sex and the Psyche, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz sit down with relationship coaches and married couple Tarah and EJ Kerwin for a refreshingly honest conversation about love, marriage, parenting, sex, and what it really takes to stay connected when life gets hard. Tarah and EJ are therapists and relationship coaches who have built their careers helping couples reconnect, but their own marriage was tested in ways they never expected and found themselves overwhelmed by exhaustion, parenting, resentment, and a level of stress that challenged everything they thought they knew about relationships. Their experience eventually led them to develop a deeper understanding of intimacy and the realization that sexual disconnection is often about much more than sex. They talk about emotional safety, mismatched desire, the impact of parenthood on sexuality, and why couples need to be able to talk about intimacy without turning sex into a weapon, obligation, or measure of love. The conversation also explores one of the most powerful ideas in their work: our partners can become mirrors for the parts of ourselves we don't always want to see. Instead of asking, “Why is my partner doing this to me?” Tarah and EJ learned to ask, “What is this relationship bringing up in me?” From attachment wounds and childhood experiences to anger, defensiveness, abandonment, and the need to feel safe, this episode gets real about the personal work that can transform a relationship. It's a conversation about what happens when we stop trying to fix our partner and start becoming curious about ourselves, and how taking responsibility for our own patterns can actually create more freedom, intimacy, and choice within a relationship. If you've ever wondered where the connection went, struggled with mismatched sexual desire, felt like parenting changed your marriage, or found yourself repeatedly triggered by the person you love most, this episode offers plenty to think about- and plenty of reasons to keep doing the work. Because sometimes, the person who knows how to push your buttons is also the person who can help you discover what those buttons are connected to. Tarah and EJ Links:  Website: https://relationshiprenovation.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationshiprenovationcounseling Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relationship_renovation/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfb8I3evBi7aZcVnmvN_yPw Learn more about Sex and the Psyche Watch this episode on YouTube Follow on Instagram and Facebook  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    EP 35: Your Partner is Your Greatest Teacher – Even When You Want to Run Away in a Minivan!
  5. Sep 23

    EP 34 - The Pleasure Piggybank

    What if pleasure wasn't something you had to earn, save for, or reserve for special occasions, but something you could intentionally build into your everyday life? In this episode of Sex and the Psyche, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz are joined spontaneously by producer Kim Kaplan for a conversation about the role of pleasure in our physical, emotional, and sexual well-being. They explore the surprising connection between exercise, relaxation, stress, and sexual desire and why there may not be one universal path to getting into the right state for intimacy. Sometimes movement and energy help us feel more alive and connected to our bodies. Other times, what we need is a ritual that helps us slow down, let go of the day's stress, and create enough space for pleasure to emerge. The conversation then takes a bigger turn: In a world where we track our sleep, steps, food, finances, and productivity, why don't we pay more attention to pleasure? Jenni, Daniel, and Kim explore the idea of a “pleasure tracker” and what it might look like to notice the small moments that make us feel good- from a warm cup of coffee or sunshine on your face to a great workout, time in nature, a cuddle, a shared meal, or sexual connection. They also unpack the difference between pleasure, intensity, and indulgence, and why chasing bigger or more intense experiences doesn't necessarily create more pleasure. True pleasure can be quiet, subtle, relational, sensory, and deeply connected to being present in the moment. And then comes the metaphor at the heart of the episode: the pleasure piggybank. Jenni describes how those small moments of pleasure are like deposits. When we regularly allow ourselves to experience pleasure throughout the day, we may arrive at intimacy with more abundance rather than feeling depleted or disconnected from our own needs. Because sexual pleasure doesn't necessarily begin in the bedroom. It can begin with learning to notice what feels good, asking for what you want, creating boundaries around your time, and giving yourself permission to experience pleasure in everyday life. You don't need a big moment every time. The pennies and nickels count, too. So what are you putting into your pleasure piggybank today? Learn more about Sex and the Psyche Watch this episode on YouTube Follow on Instagram and Facebook  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    EP 34 - The Pleasure Piggybank
  6. Sep 9 ·  Bonus

    BONUS EPISODE: Your League, Your List - Stop Wondering If They're Out Of Your League, and Start Asking If They Fit Your Life

    What does it really mean when we say someone is “out of our league”? And how much of our dating life is shaped by the way we think we or our partners rank in the eyes of other people? In this episode of Sex and the Psyche, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz unpack the cultural obsession with attractiveness, status, fitness, and the idea that some people are somehow more “valuable” partners than others. They talk about how believing someone is out of your league can create anxiety, insecurity, and even lead us to tolerate behaviors we otherwise wouldn’t accept. But they also explore the other side of the conversation: the very real reasons humans have always evaluated potential partners, and why knowing what actually matters to you can be a powerful tool. That’s where the list comes in. Jenni explains how she works with dating clients to identify their priorities- not as a checklist for finding a perfect partner, but as a way to get clear about what they truly want in a relationship and a shared life. Is attraction at the top? Kindness? Loyalty? Emotional safety? Financial security? There’s no right answer. It’s your list. And having that clarity can become a kind of safety net when chemistry, hormones, attraction, and emotions threaten to cloud your judgment. Because maybe the better question isn’t, “Is this person out of my league?” Maybe it’s: “Does this person fit the life I want?” Tune in for a candid conversation about attraction, dating, self-worth, red flags, relationship priorities, and finding the confidence to choose the relationship that works for you. Learn more about Sex and the Psyche Watch this episode on YouTube Follow on Instagram and Facebook  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    BONUS EPISODE: Your League, Your List - Stop Wondering If They're Out Of Your League, and Start Asking If They Fit Your Life
  7. Sep 2 ·  Bonus

    Taboo to Truth Part 2: When Sex Dies in a Longterm Relationship And How To Bring It Back

    What happens when your partner refuses therapy, refuses to talk, and refuses to change- but divorce isn’t on the table? In Part 2 of our special replay from Taboo to Truth, we’re once again turning the tables on Dr. Jenni and Daniel, as they continue their candid conversation with friend and fellow podcast host, Karen Bigman. We’re incredibly grateful to Karen for generously allowing us to share this two-part conversation with our Sex and the Psyche listeners and give you a chance to hear Jenni and Daniel from the other side of the microphone. This time, the conversation goes even deeper into what can slowly kill desire in long-term relationships- and what couples can realistically do when they feel stuck. Jenni and Daniel talk about how to express your needs when your partner isn't willing to budge, why stagnation- not necessarily incompatibility, can be one of the biggest threats to a couple’s sex life, and how to tell your partner you're bored in bed without completely crushing their confidence. They also unpack the “Madonna-whore complex” and the love-lust split, explore why menopause and postpartum can become significant periods of sexual stagnation, and get refreshingly personal about what it’s like to navigate intimacy when you're both married and sex therapists. And they tackle an important question about relationships and gender roles: Why do so many men defer to women when it comes to being the “relationship expert,” and what happens when both partners take responsibility for understanding and nurturing their connection? It’s honest, vulnerable, sometimes uncomfortable- and exactly the kind of conversation we love having on Sex and the Psyche. A huge thank-you to Karen Bigman and Taboo to Truth for sharing this conversation with us. If you haven't listened to Part 1 yet, go back and start there! And be sure to check out Taboo to Truth wherever you listen to podcasts. Follow Karen Bigman: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@taboototruth Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/taboototruth/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/karenbigman Website: http://taboototruth.com Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Taboo to Truth Part 2: When Sex Dies in a Longterm Relationship And How To Bring It Back

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4.9
out of 5
30 Ratings

About

Sex and the Psyche is hosted by clinical sex therapists, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz. Married with two children, Jenni and Daniel, take listeners behind the scenes on how they talk shop on a deeper level as they conceptualize the intersection of relationships, sex, and psychology. With over 16 years of helping couples and individuals enhance and optimize their sexual function, pleasure, and knowledge of human sexuality, Sex and the Psyche covers the issues that affect most everyone from desire discrepancy, erectile issues, painful sex, porn obsessions, premature and delayed ejaculation, and healing from affairs among many other topics.  As a husband-wife team and co-directors of 'The Intimacy Institute for Sex and Relationship Therapy', Jenni and Daniel share their expertise from real life scenarios, bringing a unique angle to understanding relationships while offering listeners helpful communication skills through thoughtful and intelligent conversations designed to help connect the more complicated dots for manifesting a more satisfying and sustainable sex life.  Links:  drjenniskyler.substack.com The Intimacy Institute Roadmap to Intimacy online courses  

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