Life Uninhibited - The Enneagram 6 Podcast

Kristin Messegee
  • 4.9 (84)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

Podcast for Enneagram Sixes

  1. 6d ago

    Episode #185 - Foundations Series: Patterns

    Sixes, what if the things you've been trying so hard to "fix" about yourself aren't flaws at all? In this episode, I'm kicking off a new Foundations Series exploring what it means to be an Enneagram Six—and before we get into the specifics of Type Six, we need to talk about how we approach the Enneagram in the first place. Because the Enneagram isn't simply a list of behaviors. It's about patterns. Patterns that developed for a reason. Patterns designed to protect something deeper and more tender within us. And this distinction matters for Sixes because when we learn something new about ourselves, we have a tendency to immediately turn it into a problem. Oh, I do that. I shouldn't do that. Why am I still doing that? I know better. I need to fix this. But when we approach our Six patterns that way, we're actually looking at the pattern through the pattern. In this episode, we explore: Why the Enneagram is about patterns, not just behaviors The protective function behind our personality patterns Why Sixes tend to turn self-awareness into another problem to solve How our desire for certainty can show up in personal growth work Why knowing more about yourself doesn't automatically create transformation The difference between seeing a pattern as a flaw and getting curious about what it's protecting How approaching yourself differently can become a foundation for self-trust As we move through this Foundations Series, I want you to remember: Your patterns are trying to protect you. They are not revealing something wrong with you. So instead of asking: "Why am I like this?" Try: "I wonder what this pattern is protecting me from?" That's where we're starting. Helpful Links: Learn more about Uninhibited HERE Schedule you Uninhibited Consultation HERE You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #185 - Foundations Series: Patterns

  2. Sep 2

    Episode #184 - Chat with Keely, Enneagram 6

    Schedule Your Uninhibited Consultation HERE What does this work actually look like in real life? Not when you've mastered your Sixness. Not when you've stopped feeling anxious or second-guessing yourself. But when you're still very much a Six—and you're learning how to relate to yourself differently. In this episode, I'm joined by my client Keely, an Enneagram Six who completed the first round of Uninhibited and is coming back for round two. We talk about some very familiar Six patterns: hypervigilance, overpreparing, self-doubt, needing reassurance, and the pressure to do things "right." But more importantly, Keely shares what has changed. She talks about preparing for this very podcast interview by... not preparing. 😬 She shares what it was like to stand up in front of a room with a microphone without scripting everything first. And we talk about learning to notice our Six patterns without immediately turning them into more evidence that something is wrong with us. In this episode, we explore: The difference between insight and awareness Why noticing your patterns in real time matters Holding what you notice with compassion instead of criticism How overpreparing can feel necessary even when it's draining you Learning to trust yourself to meet the moment Why planning and anxiety aren't inherently bad Self-doubt as a Six "cognitive style" What happens when "Why can't I just...?" becomes your internal dialogue The strengths of Sixes—including loyalty, conscientiousness, humor, and commitment Learning to like your Sixness instead of trying to fix it Why community can make this work feel safer, lighter, and even fun Maybe the goal isn't to become less of a Six. Maybe it's to have more freedom and choice within your Sixness. As Keely put it: "There's nothing wrong with me. There's nothing I need to fix." Helpful Links: Learn more about Uninhibited HERE Schedule you Uninhibited Consultation HERE You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #184 - Chat with Keely, Enneagram 6

  3. Aug 26

    Episode #183 - Essential Work for Type 6

    Schedule Your Uninhibited Consultation HERE   Sixes, you're already working really hard.  You're managing a lot. Thinking about a lot. Taking care of a lot. Trying to anticipate a lot. So what if the answer isn't working harder? What if it's learning how to redirect some of the energy you're already using? In this episode, I'm walking through what I consider to be some of the essential work for Enneagram Sixes—and, conveniently, the work we'll be doing together in the next round of Uninhibited. We talk about why Sixes often prefer information over practice, why what's happening in your body impacts the thoughts available to you, and how the questions you automatically ask yourself can keep you spinning instead of helping you move forward. We also get into one of the biggest shifts I want for Sixes: moving from an internal experience of scarcity—I need more information, more certainty, more support, more proof—toward a growing sense of sufficiency. I have enough to take the next step. I know enough to make this decision. I can handle my life as it comes. In this episode, we explore: Why Sixes don't necessarily need to work harder—we need to redirect our energy Information vs. practice and why insight alone doesn't create change How to shift your physiological state so you can access different thinking The automatic questions Sixes ask that keep us stuck How better questions create more productive thinking Developing an internal voice that feels supportive and trustworthy Moving from internal scarcity toward sufficiency Creating more space between trigger and response What it means to practice self-loyalty and stay on your own side Becoming more internally sturdy while navigating life as it actually is You probably have more capacity, support, resources, and internal sturdiness than you realize. The work isn't always creating more. Sometimes it's learning to see—and trust—what is already there. A question to take with you: What if I already have enough within me to take the next step? Helpful Links: Learn more about Uninhibited HERE Schedule you Uninhibited Consultation HERE You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #183 - Essential Work for Type 6

  4. Aug 19

    Episode #182 - Mind the Gap

    Schedule Your Uninhibited Consultation HERESixes, what happens in the space between what you know... and what you don't know?  Your brain fills it in. And usually, it doesn't fill it in with the most supportive story. In this episode, I introduce a concept I'm calling Mind the Gap—the practice of noticing what happens inside us when we're faced with uncertainty. Maybe you say something vulnerable and don't know how the other person will respond. Maybe you're starting something new and have no idea how it's going to go. Maybe you're waiting on an answer. There it is: the gap. And for Sixes, that gap can quickly fill with fear, worst-case scenarios, contingency plans, control, anger, cynicism, or attempts to convince ourselves we don't care about something we actually care very much about. In this episode, we explore: What the uncertainty gap looks like for Enneagram Sixes Why our brains automatically perceive uncertainty as potential threat How fear fills in what we don't know The thoughts, feelings, and actions that follow Why control, planning, anger, and cynicism can all be attempts to close the gap How regulating your emotional state can change the thoughts that follow What it means to let uncertainty exist without immediately filling it in How noticing your automatic pattern gives you more choice about what happens next We can't eliminate uncertainty. But we can learn how to stop letting our automatic response to uncertainty run our lives. A question to take with you: Where is there a gap of uncertainty in my life right now—and what is my Six brain filling it with? Helpful Links: Learn more about Uninhibited HERE Schedule you Uninhibited Consultation HERE You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #182 - Mind the Gap

  5. Aug 12

    Episode #181 - Anxiety, Guilt, and Shame. Oh my!

    What happens inside you after you make a mistake? For Sixes, it can get complicated fast. There may be healthy guilt—the ugh, I wish I hadn't done that feeling that lets us know we've acted outside of our values. But then anxiety can jump in. What are they going to think? Are they mad? Did I ruin something? And if we're not careful, shame isn't far behind. What kind of person does that? Maybe I'm irresponsible. Maybe I'm unprofessional. Maybe there's something wrong with me. In this episode, I use a very real—and thankfully pretty low-stakes—mistake of my own to explore what guilt, anxiety, and shame actually feel like from the inside. We talk about: Why healthy guilt can actually be useful How anxiety fills uncertainty with worst-case stories The difference between "I made a mistake" and "I am the kind of person who makes these mistakes" Why Sixes can over-apologize, defend, blame, or seek reassurance when anxiety and shame take over How to own what's yours without taking on more than what's yours Why practicing with the small stuff can help you understand your internal patterns How curiosity creates space between your automatic reaction and what you choose to do next Your first reaction may be automatic. What you do with that reaction doesn't have to be. A question to take with you: Am I owning a mistake—or am I making the mistake mean something about who I am? Helpful Links: Learn more about Uninhibited HERE Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #181 - Anxiety, Guilt, and Shame. Oh my!

  6. Aug 5

    Episode #180 - Sixes and Guilt! Let's discuss

    Guilt is one of those emotions Sixes talk about all the time.  But what if much of what we're calling guilt… isn't actually guilt? In this episode, I unpack the difference between healthy guilt—the kind that points us toward repair and integrity—and the anxiety, worry, and rumination that so many Sixes mistake for guilt. Because when we confuse anxiety with guilt, we end up carrying responsibility that was never ours, apologizing for taking up space, and trying to control relationships that were never ours to control. We explore: The difference between healthy guilt and anxious guilt Why guilt has an important purpose in healthy relationships The healing cycle of rupture and repair How Sixes confuse fear of disconnection with guilt Why saying "no" or disappointing someone isn't automatically something to feel guilty about How guilt can become another way to maintain the illusion of control The surprising relationship between guilt, anger, and self-trust This episode isn't about getting rid of guilt. It's about recognizing when guilt is actually pointing you toward integrity... and when anxiety is simply wearing guilt's clothes. A question to take with you: Am I feeling true guilt… or am I simply afraid someone will be upset with me? Helpful Links: Learn more about Uninhibited HERE Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #180 - Sixes and Guilt! Let's discuss

  7. Jul 29

    Episode #179 - Sixes and Positive Emotions...HOW?!

    If you're waiting to feel peaceful after you've solved all the problems...  You may be waiting forever. As Sixes, we often believe that calm, joy, and peace are rewards we earn after we've fixed everything that's wrong. But what if those emotions aren't waiting on the other side of certainty? What if they're available now? In this episode, we shift the conversation from difficult emotions to the emotions we long for more of. We explore why our brains naturally focus on threat, why that's not a flaw, and how we can intentionally build new pathways that allow us to notice beauty, support, calm, and joy—even when life is hard. This isn't about pretending everything is okay. It's about learning where to place your attention. In this episode, we explore: Why Sixes don't have to "earn" positive emotions How attention shapes your emotional experience The power of resourcing and practicing beauty Why changing your physical state changes your thinking How to interrupt anxious spirals before solving problems Why calm doesn't come from certainty How to build more moments of peace without changing your circumstances A question to take with you: Where is my attention right now—and is it creating the experience I want? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #179 - Sixes and Positive Emotions...HOW?!

  8. Jul 22

    Episode #178 - OK, But Why Would I do THIS to Myself?

    Last week, we explored why we experience difficult emotions at all. This week, we're continuing the conversation by looking at three emotions Sixes often spend a tremendous amount of energy trying to avoid: disappointment, fear, and anxiety.  What if disappointment isn't something to protect yourself from? What if fear isn't the enemy? And what if anxiety isn't actually solving the problem your brain thinks it's solving? In this episode, we explore how our emotional lives shape so many of the behaviors Sixes know well—lowering expectations, planning for every possibility, overthinking, pessimism, and trying to stay ahead of pain before it ever arrives. The goal isn't to stop having these emotions. The goal is to become safe enough inside yourself that you no longer have to organize your life around avoiding them. In this episode, we discuss: Why disappointment reveals what you genuinely care about How lowering expectations can quietly shrink your life The difference between fear and anxiety Why anxiety loops keep us from deeper emotions How learning to tolerate difficult feelings builds self-trust Why you don't have to outrun your emotions to live an uninhibited life A question to take with you: What feeling am I actually trying to avoid? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #178 - OK, But Why Would I do THIS to Myself?
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