Life Uninhibited - The Enneagram 6 Podcast

Kristin Messegee
  • 4.9 (82)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

Podcast for Enneagram Sixes

  1. 18h ago

    Episode #182 - Mind the Gap

    Schedule Your Uninhibited Consultation HERESixes, what happens in the space between what you know... and what you don't know?  Your brain fills it in. And usually, it doesn't fill it in with the most supportive story. In this episode, I introduce a concept I'm calling Mind the Gap—the practice of noticing what happens inside us when we're faced with uncertainty. Maybe you say something vulnerable and don't know how the other person will respond. Maybe you're starting something new and have no idea how it's going to go. Maybe you're waiting on an answer. There it is: the gap. And for Sixes, that gap can quickly fill with fear, worst-case scenarios, contingency plans, control, anger, cynicism, or attempts to convince ourselves we don't care about something we actually care very much about. In this episode, we explore: What the uncertainty gap looks like for Enneagram Sixes Why our brains automatically perceive uncertainty as potential threat How fear fills in what we don't know The thoughts, feelings, and actions that follow Why control, planning, anger, and cynicism can all be attempts to close the gap How regulating your emotional state can change the thoughts that follow What it means to let uncertainty exist without immediately filling it in How noticing your automatic pattern gives you more choice about what happens next We can't eliminate uncertainty. But we can learn how to stop letting our automatic response to uncertainty run our lives. A question to take with you: Where is there a gap of uncertainty in my life right now—and what is my Six brain filling it with? Helpful Links: Learn more about Uninhibited HERE Schedule you Uninhibited Consultation HERE You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #182 - Mind the Gap

  2. Aug 12

    Episode #181 - Anxiety, Guilt, and Shame. Oh my!

    What happens inside you after you make a mistake? For Sixes, it can get complicated fast. There may be healthy guilt—the ugh, I wish I hadn't done that feeling that lets us know we've acted outside of our values. But then anxiety can jump in. What are they going to think? Are they mad? Did I ruin something? And if we're not careful, shame isn't far behind. What kind of person does that? Maybe I'm irresponsible. Maybe I'm unprofessional. Maybe there's something wrong with me. In this episode, I use a very real—and thankfully pretty low-stakes—mistake of my own to explore what guilt, anxiety, and shame actually feel like from the inside. We talk about: Why healthy guilt can actually be useful How anxiety fills uncertainty with worst-case stories The difference between "I made a mistake" and "I am the kind of person who makes these mistakes" Why Sixes can over-apologize, defend, blame, or seek reassurance when anxiety and shame take over How to own what's yours without taking on more than what's yours Why practicing with the small stuff can help you understand your internal patterns How curiosity creates space between your automatic reaction and what you choose to do next Your first reaction may be automatic. What you do with that reaction doesn't have to be. A question to take with you: Am I owning a mistake—or am I making the mistake mean something about who I am? Helpful Links: Learn more about Uninhibited HERE Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #181 - Anxiety, Guilt, and Shame. Oh my!

  3. Aug 5

    Episode #180 - Sixes and Guilt! Let's discuss

    Guilt is one of those emotions Sixes talk about all the time.  But what if much of what we're calling guilt… isn't actually guilt? In this episode, I unpack the difference between healthy guilt—the kind that points us toward repair and integrity—and the anxiety, worry, and rumination that so many Sixes mistake for guilt. Because when we confuse anxiety with guilt, we end up carrying responsibility that was never ours, apologizing for taking up space, and trying to control relationships that were never ours to control. We explore: The difference between healthy guilt and anxious guilt Why guilt has an important purpose in healthy relationships The healing cycle of rupture and repair How Sixes confuse fear of disconnection with guilt Why saying "no" or disappointing someone isn't automatically something to feel guilty about How guilt can become another way to maintain the illusion of control The surprising relationship between guilt, anger, and self-trust This episode isn't about getting rid of guilt. It's about recognizing when guilt is actually pointing you toward integrity... and when anxiety is simply wearing guilt's clothes. A question to take with you: Am I feeling true guilt… or am I simply afraid someone will be upset with me? Helpful Links: Learn more about Uninhibited HERE Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #180 - Sixes and Guilt! Let's discuss

  4. Jul 29

    Episode #179 - Sixes and Positive Emotions...HOW?!

    If you're waiting to feel peaceful after you've solved all the problems...  You may be waiting forever. As Sixes, we often believe that calm, joy, and peace are rewards we earn after we've fixed everything that's wrong. But what if those emotions aren't waiting on the other side of certainty? What if they're available now? In this episode, we shift the conversation from difficult emotions to the emotions we long for more of. We explore why our brains naturally focus on threat, why that's not a flaw, and how we can intentionally build new pathways that allow us to notice beauty, support, calm, and joy—even when life is hard. This isn't about pretending everything is okay. It's about learning where to place your attention. In this episode, we explore: Why Sixes don't have to "earn" positive emotions How attention shapes your emotional experience The power of resourcing and practicing beauty Why changing your physical state changes your thinking How to interrupt anxious spirals before solving problems Why calm doesn't come from certainty How to build more moments of peace without changing your circumstances A question to take with you: Where is my attention right now—and is it creating the experience I want? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #179 - Sixes and Positive Emotions...HOW?!

  5. Jul 22

    Episode #178 - OK, But Why Would I do THIS to Myself?

    Last week, we explored why we experience difficult emotions at all. This week, we're continuing the conversation by looking at three emotions Sixes often spend a tremendous amount of energy trying to avoid: disappointment, fear, and anxiety.  What if disappointment isn't something to protect yourself from? What if fear isn't the enemy? And what if anxiety isn't actually solving the problem your brain thinks it's solving? In this episode, we explore how our emotional lives shape so many of the behaviors Sixes know well—lowering expectations, planning for every possibility, overthinking, pessimism, and trying to stay ahead of pain before it ever arrives. The goal isn't to stop having these emotions. The goal is to become safe enough inside yourself that you no longer have to organize your life around avoiding them. In this episode, we discuss: Why disappointment reveals what you genuinely care about How lowering expectations can quietly shrink your life The difference between fear and anxiety Why anxiety loops keep us from deeper emotions How learning to tolerate difficult feelings builds self-trust Why you don't have to outrun your emotions to live an uninhibited life A question to take with you: What feeling am I actually trying to avoid? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #178 - OK, But Why Would I do THIS to Myself?

  6. Jul 15

    Episode #177 - Why Would I Do This To Myself?

    If we create our own emotional experience...  Why would we ever create emotions that feel so awful? It's such a good question. And one I hear—both from myself and from my clients—all the time. In this episode, we continue our conversation about feelings and explore why difficult emotions aren't mistakes to fix or signs that something has gone wrong. They're part of being human. As Sixes, we often assume that if we feel fear, sadness, anger, or grief, there must be a problem to solve. We immediately begin looking for who caused it, what went wrong, or how to make it stop. But what if those emotions aren't the enemy? What if they're actually revealing what matters most? In this episode, we explore: Why difficult emotions aren't evidence that something is wrong The Six belief that negative emotions always require fixing What sadness, grief, and anger are actually trying to show us Why our brains confuse emotional discomfort with danger The difference between feeling an emotion and acting from it How curiosity creates more freedom than judgment Why learning to let emotions rise and fall builds self-trust This episode isn't about liking uncomfortable feelings. It's about changing your relationship with them. A question to take with you: What if this emotion isn't a problem to solve… but something to understand? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #177 - Why Would I Do This To Myself?

  7. Jul 8

    Episode #176 - It Really Is All About Feelings

    What if the thing you've been trying to fix… isn't actually the problem? In this episode, we talk about one of the most life-changing ideas I've ever learned: We create our emotional experience from the inside out. As Sixes, we often believe that if people behaved differently, if circumstances changed, or if life became more certain, we'd finally feel better. But that's not how emotions work. Instead, our minds and bodies are constantly interpreting what's happening around us, creating emotions, assigning meaning, and building stories—all in a matter of seconds. Understanding this doesn't make difficult emotions disappear. It gives us something much more valuable: Choice. In this episode, we explore: Why emotions aren't created by external circumstances How our brains assign meaning to physical sensations The belief that some emotions are "good" and others are "bad" Why Sixes immediately move into fix-it mode when uncomfortable feelings arise The courage it takes to become curious instead of reactive How taking ownership of your emotional life creates freedom A real-life example of how changing the story changed an entire conversation A question to take with you: What story am I telling myself about this feeling—and is there another possibility?   Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #176 - It Really Is All About Feelings

  8. Jul 1

    Episode #175 - Unproductive Thinking vs. Productive Thinking

    One of the questions I hear most from Sixes is:  "How do I know if I'm thinking something through... or just overthinking?" It's a great question. Because as Sixes, our minds are incredibly capable. We anticipate problems, make contingency plans, and often see things others miss. Those are real strengths. But those same strengths can quietly shift into rumination, endless doubt, and anxiety that keeps us stuck. In this episode, I answer a listener question about leadership, decision-making, and the challenge of knowing when thinking is actually helping. We explore: Why overthinking sometimes does contribute to success—and when it doesn't The difference between productive and unproductive thinking Why certainty is never actually available (even though Sixes desperately want it) How discomfort is part of making decisions and building self-trust The questions productive thinking asks—and the ones anxiety keeps repeating Why productive thinking leads to clarity, while unproductive thinking leads to chaos This episode isn't about thinking less. It's about learning to recognize when your mind is helping you... and when it's simply serving fear. A question to take with you: Is my thinking moving me toward clarity… or just keeping me busy? Helpful Links: Sign up for my FREE Series on Confidence or Self Loyalty email series! You can find me on Instagram HERE You can contact me HERE if you have questions or want to chat more about Life Coaching

    Episode #175 - Unproductive Thinking vs. Productive Thinking
See All (184)

4.9
out of 5
82 Ratings

About

Podcast for Enneagram Sixes

Information

You Might Also Like