BeThatHealingGirl Podcast

bethathealinggirl
  • 4.9 (176)
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Listen up Girlies!! Healing isn’t just a (hot girl) walk in the park, it’s a damn journey. The BeThatHealingGirl Podcast is all about busting old school dating myths, breaking down our childhood traumas, unlearning our bad habits and healing your way to your DREAM LIFE! Let’s keep it real and begin to heal because honestly… eff that guy not texting you back, stop worrying about being liked, it’s time to let go of anxious attachment behaviors, start getting comfortable with being vulnerable and know your damn worth! So stop wishing you were her, join the journey and BE that healing girl.

  1. 4H AGO

    What Secure Love Actually Feels Like

    Today’s episode is a really special one because I’m joined by my dear friend and former client, Alyssa, and we’re talking about something that so many women with anxious attachment quietly wonder: What does secure love actually feel like? Not the Instagram version. Not the “perfect relationship” fantasy. But what it feels like inside your body when the spiraling, the overthinking, and the constant mental gymnastics in your relationship finally start to settle. Because when you’re deep in anxious attachment, it can feel incredibly defeating. You’re reading the books. Saving the posts. Going to therapy. Trying to say the right things.   And yet… you still feel stuck in the same patterns.   In this conversation, Alyssa shares what her relationship and inner world actually looked like before doing this work — including:   • Believing the real problem was “communication” • Trying to word things perfectly so her partner would respond the right way • Doing all the reading, therapy, and Instagram saving… but still feeling stuck • The exhaustion of overthinking every conversation • Why “knowing the information” didn’t actually change anything   We also talk about something I see constantly with high-achieving women: being extremely self-aware… but still spiraling in relationships.   Alyssa shares honestly about what finally shifted for her and what secure love started to feel like when things began to change. If you’ve ever thought: “Why do I keep overthinking even though I know better?” “Why can’t I stop spiraling in my relationship?” “Why do I feel so emotionally exhausted from love?” This conversation will likely feel very familiar. You’re not broken. And you’re definitely not the only one who’s felt this way.   Welcome back to the Be That Healing Girl Podcast! Today we’re talking about something I see constantly with my clients...and honestly something I know very well from my own life too: the overthinking spiral. You know the one. You reread the texts. You rewrite the message three times before sending it. You rehearse the conversation in the shower, in the car, before bed… maybe 12 times. You tell yourself you're just trying to be thoughtful or self-aware. But your brain is basically running a full soap opera about a situation that hasn’t even happened yet. And the worst part? Most of the time nothing is actually wrong, but your brain refuses to relax. In this episode we talk about: - The difference between overthinking and self-sabotage - Why high-achieving, self-aware women get stuck in relationship rumination - The “rewrite the text five times” pattern - Why reassurance from your partner never actually sticks - How overthinking is often just a really smart form of self-protection - Why healing anxious attachment requires learning to sit in uncertainty Because the truth is… when you're in that spiral, you're not really trying to solve a problem. You're trying to get relief. And your brain is convinced that if it just analyzes the situation one more time, you'll finally feel safe. Spoiler: it doesn't work like that. I also share a bit about what's been coming up for me personally as I prepare for a big family trip where I’ll be seeing my dad for the first time in 11 years - and how easy it is to slip into trying to say the “perfect thing” instead of just being present. If you’ve ever thought: “Am I overthinking this?” “Am I self-sabotaging something good?” “Why can’t my brain just chill?” This episode is for you! Take a breath. You’re not crazy. Your brain just learned a really intense way of trying to protect you. And we’re going to talk about it.   💌 Ready for deeper support? Inside Healing Girl Gang, we practice the tools and reps that move you from anxious attachment → secure connection. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥  💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖 🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

    29 min

  2. 6D AGO

    Are You Overthinking… Or Self-Sabotaging Your Relationship

    Welcome back to the Be That Healing Girl Podcast! Today we’re talking about something I see constantly with my clients...and honestly something I know very well from my own life too: the overthinking spiral. You know the one. You reread the texts. You rewrite the message three times before sending it. You rehearse the conversation in the shower, in the car, before bed… maybe 12 times. You tell yourself you're just trying to be thoughtful or self-aware. But your brain is basically running a full soap opera about a situation that hasn’t even happened yet. And the worst part? Most of the time nothing is actually wrong, but your brain refuses to relax. In this episode we talk about: - The difference between overthinking and self-sabotage - Why high-achieving, self-aware women get stuck in relationship rumination - The “rewrite the text five times” pattern - Why reassurance from your partner never actually sticks - How overthinking is often just a really smart form of self-protection - Why healing anxious attachment requires learning to sit in uncertainty Because the truth is… when you're in that spiral, you're not really trying to solve a problem. You're trying to get relief. And your brain is convinced that if it just analyzes the situation one more time, you'll finally feel safe. Spoiler: it doesn't work like that. I also share a bit about what's been coming up for me personally as I prepare for a big family trip where I’ll be seeing my dad for the first time in 11 years - and how easy it is to slip into trying to say the “perfect thing” instead of just being present. If you’ve ever thought: “Am I overthinking this?” “Am I self-sabotaging something good?” “Why can’t my brain just chill?” This episode is for you! Take a breath. You’re not crazy. Your brain just learned a really intense way of trying to protect you. And we’re going to talk about it.   💌 Ready for deeper support? Inside Healing Girl Gang, we practice the tools and reps that move you from anxious attachment → secure connection. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥  💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖 🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

    16 min

  3. FEB 24

    Why Being a High Achiever Makes Relationship Anxiety Worse

    In this week’s episode of the Be That Healing Girl podcast, we’re getting real about one of the biggest patterns in anxious attachment: trying to “project manage” love instead of actually participating in partnership. If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing all the emotional labor… overthinking every interaction… or secretly wishing your partner would just know what you need without you having to say it — this episode is for you. Because here’s the truth: Love gets heavy when you treat your relationship like a project to optimize, fix, and control. Love gets easier when you treat it like a partnership. In this episode, I break down: Why healthy relationships require honest requests (not mind-reading) The difference between partnership vs. parenting in love How anxious attachment shows up as overworking, overthinking, and over-functioning Why trying harder in relationships often backfires How to stop managing the relationship and start participating in it   If you’re a high-achieving woman who’s confident in your career but anxious in your relationship… constantly trying to “get it right”… and exhausted from overthinking love — you’re in the right place. This conversation will help you soften, get honest with yourself, and start relating from security instead of fear. ✨ Remember: love isn’t supposed to feel like a full-time job. 💌 Ready for deeper support? Inside Healing Girl Gang, we practice the tools and reps that move you from anxious attachment → secure connection. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥  💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖 🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

    15 min

  4. FEB 17

    Why Valentine's Day Didn't Feel As You Hoped

    Why didn’t Valentine’s Day feel the way you hoped… even though your partner is actually a good person? In this episode of the Be That Healing Girl Podcast, I’m breaking down the real reason you felt disappointed after Valentine’s Day, a weekend together, a date, or quality time — and why it triggered doubt, overthinking, and questioning the relationship. This conversation is for high-achieving, self-aware women who know their partner is loving and consistent… but still spiral afterward wondering: “Are we a good fit?” “Am I asking for too much?” “Should I feel more excited than this?” If you’ve ever replayed moments, searched for evidence of a lack of effort, or felt emotionally distant after something that was supposed to feel romantic — this episode will hit. Because here’s the truth: Disappointment doesn’t always mean the relationship is wrong. Sometimes it reveals the pattern underneath anxious attachment, overthinking, and unmet expectations. In this episode, we unpack: Why Valentine’s Day, vacations, and “quality time” can trigger relationship anxiety The expectation vs. reality trap that fuels overthinking How internal comparison (social media, other couples) creates dissatisfaction Why your brain searches for proof they “didn’t show up enough” The difference between asking for too much vs. settling for too little How anxious attachment and avoidant tendencies can both show up after closeness Why you may be questioning the relationship instead of your internal narrative The hidden pattern: confusing intensity for spark and chaos for love I also share a personal behind-the-scenes moment from my own relationship with Craig — and how learning to release control and let myself be surprised changed our connection. If you’re exhausted from spending mental energy spiraling about whether your partner is “the one,” this episode will help you zoom out, regulate, and reconnect. You’re not broken. You’re not dramatic. You’re likely running a pattern that can be unlearned. And that’s exactly what we work on here.   💌 Ready for deeper support? Inside Healing Girl Gang, we practice the tools and reps that move you from anxious attachment → secure connection. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥  💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖 🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

    15 min

  5. FEB 10

    When You’re Worried They Won’t Show Up For You on Valentines Day

    Worried they won’t show up for you on Valentine’s Day? Spiraling about whether you’ll feel chosen, loved, or disappointed? This episode is for you. 💔 In this week’s podcast ep, we’re talking about relationship anxiety around Valentine’s Day... and why overthinking romance, surprises, and expectations can actually block the connection you want most. If you’ve ever: - Wondered if you should tell your partner what you want… or stay “chill” - Felt scared to seem needy or high‑maintenance - Lowered your expectations so you don’t get hurt - Fantasized about being chosen without having to ask - Kept score after holidays, gifts, or effort …this conversation will hit home. I’m breaking down the anxious attachment patterns that get activated around Valentine’s Day, including the internal debate of “Do I say something or not?”, people‑pleasing tendencies, and how the pressure to be the “cool girl” creates distance in relationships. We also talk about: ✨ Why overthinking ruins spontaneity and romance ✨ The truth about wanting to feel chosen in relationships ✨ How scorekeeping damages connection over time ✨ What you’re actually in control of (and what you’re not) ✨ How to lead yourself through uncertainty without spiraling Because here’s the hard truth: you are NOT in control of whether your partner “gets it right” on Valentine’s Day… but you are in control of how you show up for yourself. If you struggle with anxious attachment, relationship anxiety, or overthinking a good partner — this episode will help you reset before the holiday and focus on what actually builds secure love. 💌 Ready for deeper support? Inside Healing Girl Gang, we practice the tools and reps that move you from anxious attachment → secure connection. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥  💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖 🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

    15 min

  6. FEB 3

    Why You Overthink When Nothing is Wrong in the Relationship

    If things feel safe in person but the moment you’re apart your brain goes into panic mode… this is the episode to save, replay, and send to your bestie. In this episode I share: ✨ Why your brain goes into “red alert” even when there’s no actual danger ✨ What overthinking is really trying to protect you from ✨ How anxious attachment can show up as avoidant behavior ✨ The sneaky ways your anxiety becomes a compulsion (yes, like gambling) ✨ What finally helped me stop trying to micromanage my relationship This one’s personal... I also share how the same overthinking loop showed up in planning my trip to the Philippines (including seeing my dad for the first time in years)… and what finally helped me feel safe enough to stop trying to figure it all out. And if you feel like you logically know there’s no threat but your body still freaks out? You're not broken. You're running an old system. Inside The Healing Girl Gang, we don’t just talk about the theory, we practice the new pattern. 🎧 So if you’re tired of always waiting for the other shoe to drop, this is your sign to listen. 🦋 Ready for the deeper work?  🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥  💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖 🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

    16 min

  7. JAN 28

    I Didn’t Look at the Facts, and My Relationship Paid the Price

    In today’s episode, I’m getting real about the moment I didn’t look at the facts and how my relationship paid the price. If you’re an overthinker, a scenario-maker, a “what if” queen, or someone who keeps searching for problems when there are none… this episode is for you. Because here’s the hard truth: 👉 Overthinking in relationships isn’t emotional intelligence. 👉 It’s avoidance. 👉 And it quietly pushes safe, loving partners away. If you’ve ever wondered, “Wait… am I the drama?” (lovingly), you’re in the right place. In this episode we talk about: ✨ Why anxious attachment makes you question healthy relationships ✨ How self-sabotage shows up as “being logical” or “being cautious” ✨ The difference between facts vs. stories your anxiety creates ✨ Why safe love can feel boring, uncomfortable, or “wrong” at first ✨ How trying to control conversations and outcomes kills intimacy ✨ What it actually takes to stop pushing good people away   I also share a personal update after my hysterectomy recovery, how this same self-sabotage pattern showed up in my health journey, and why anxious attachment isn’t just about dating... it’s about how we avoid deeper emotional truth in every area of life. If you’re a high-achieving woman who is crushing it in your career but spiraling in your relationship… I see you. You are not broken. You’re just running an outdated emotional system. 🦋 Ready for the deeper work?  🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥  💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖 🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

    19 min

  8. JAN 20

    How to Stop Trying So Hard Because You’re Scared They’ll Stop Loving You

    Welcome back to the Be That Healing Girl podcast! 🧠💘 Today’s episode is for the girlies who are exhausted from being the emotional project manager of their relationship. You know the one: the planner, the fixer, the emotional laborer, the one Googling “how to stop being anxious but still be lovable.” If your brain tells you, “If I stop trying, nothing will happen,” and you're scared your relationship will crumble unless you give 200% every second… this episode will hit. hard. 👀 We’re talking: - The lie anxious attachment tells you about effort = love - How overfunctioning is killing your vibe and your connection - What it actually means to feel safe and loved without working overtime - And why letting your partner choose you requires you to chill (even if it makes you twitchy) Plus... an update from my hysterectomy recovery era and how Head Nurse Craig is thriving, and I am deeply humbled and deeply moisturized. 🎧 And don’t forget: if you’re tired of the spiral, the resentment, and the fake chill girl act, the Healing Girl Gang is where we turn information into actual transformation. It’s not just “awareness,” babe. It’s reps, it’s nervous system work, it’s receipts. Come do the work and feel good doing it! 🦋 Ready for the deeper work?  🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥  💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖 🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session

    17 min
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4.9
out of 5
176 Ratings

About

Listen up Girlies!! Healing isn’t just a (hot girl) walk in the park, it’s a damn journey. The BeThatHealingGirl Podcast is all about busting old school dating myths, breaking down our childhood traumas, unlearning our bad habits and healing your way to your DREAM LIFE! Let’s keep it real and begin to heal because honestly… eff that guy not texting you back, stop worrying about being liked, it’s time to let go of anxious attachment behaviors, start getting comfortable with being vulnerable and know your damn worth! So stop wishing you were her, join the journey and BE that healing girl.

Information

  • Creator
    bethathealinggirl
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2026
  • Episodes
    100
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2023 All rights reserved.
  • Show Website
    BeThatHealingGirl Podcast

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