we are NOT the SAME

Heather Gardner and Lacey Joseph
  • 4.0 (4)
  • COMEDY
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

We Are Not the Same: Join our comedic journey as Bodybuilder Barbie flexes her muscles against Daria’s dry wit! Dive into the hilarity of life’s twists and turns through the eyes of two contrasting besties who prove that different perspectives lead to the best stories. Tune in for laughs, randomness, and a sprinkle of chaos! 

  1. 5D AGO

    One Of Us Got Run Over, Did Karaoke, And Bought A Vibrator

    Send us a text Ever feel that snap when your patience finally gives out? We call it “crashing out,” and we get honest about how it shows up: the public blowups, the quiet spirals you hide at home, the friend-only vents, and the moments you wish you could take back. We share the messy, human stories—getting run over by your own car during a fight, stealing the karaoke mic on a wave of adrenaline, shattering a car window in rage—and then break down what those moments taught us about triggers, boundaries, and repair. We also explore the subtler crash: social media spirals that escalate post by post. You’ll hear the red flags we watch for, the rules we use to avoid late-night posting regret, and the small rituals that help us cool off fast. Relationships sit at the center of many crashes—jealousy, disrespect, being ignored—so we talk about calling out bad behavior without lighting the room on fire, and owning it when anger crosses into harm. There’s humor too, because life at home is a minefield of empty boxes in the pantry, missing scissors, and milk crimes that can tip you over the edge. What keeps us grounded now is a mix of structure and self-awareness: labeled tools, duplicate essentials, weekly return bins, ten-minute rage room sessions, and simple de-escalation steps like breathing, a walk, or a “sleep on it” rule. Growth looks like shorter meltdowns, less fallout, faster repair—and the courage to say sorry. If you’ve ever wondered why small things trigger big reactions, or how to land the plane before it hits the ground, this one’s for you. If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend who gets it, and leave a review with your favorite crash-out reset so we can try it too. - Support the show

    53 min

  2. JAN 29

    Two Besties Walk Into A Podcast And Forget The Agenda

    Send us a text What happens when you hit record with a plan and end up somewhere more honest? We tumble from sound-check chaos into a raw conversation about identity, memory, and the weird science of hating your own recorded voice. That small cringe opens a bigger door: how we think we sound versus how the world hears us, and how that gap mirrors the distance between who we were and who we’re becoming. Our phones turn into time machines as we scroll old videos—ice packs under club dresses, drunk bravery, and the friendships that kept us upright when sleep and sense didn’t. The nostalgia is funny until it isn’t, because adulthood has its own gravity: five jobs, kids’ competitions, chronic back updates, compression socks, and careful budgets. One of us treats herself like a business—tracking progress, protecting her credit score, building tiny systems to make the day work. It’s not glamorous, but it’s realistic, and sometimes realism is the most compassionate path forward. Then the episode swerves into a moral knot that won’t let go: a viral Brazilian story where a married couple learns they’re siblings after 20 years and a child. We wrestle with the ethics and the human part—stay or split, redefine intimacy, seek genetic counseling, shield the next generation from risk. From there, a DNA test mix-up sparks six weeks of panic about who’s Dad—until a simple account setting restores reality and our sense of humor. Along the way, we compare coping styles (catastrophize vs confront), roast bloated self-help books, and design a saner book club with flexible attendance, genre variety, and just enough deadlines to keep us honest. We even plot a ghost-hunting birthday and negotiate for homemade bread, because accountability tastes better warm. If you’ve ever cringed at your own voice, carried a past self like a souvenir, or needed permission to build life in practical, unsexy steps, this conversation is your mirror. Subscribe, share with a friend who loves messy honesty, and leave a review with the one memory you’d keep exactly as it is. - Support the show

    54 min

  3. JAN 20

    From Choppelgangers To Goblin Mode: Trends, Lookalikes, And Laughs

    Send us a text A stranger says you have a twin—and then sends a photo that’s a little too close for comfort. That’s where we start: with the “choppelganger,” the chopped-up version of you that’s somehow familiar and somehow… not. From there we tumble into the uncanny world of lookalikes, the math behind resemblance, and the subtle ways Hollywood and algorithms nudge us into face clusters that all start to blur. We trade stories of accidental twins, from teens finding mirror images on Instagram to the Margot Robbie lookalike vortex that proves how casting types shape what we think beauty is. A study pegging the odds of a convincing double at about one in 135 kicks off questions about identity, bias, and why a banana photo can haunt your feed for years. Then the vibe flips into a rapid tour of modern slang and culture: quiet quitting as a survival strategy, goblin mode as a comfort manifesto, riz as charisma-with-vowels-missing, and de-influencing as the rare antidote to hype. We argue about Labubu collectibles, call clogs “potato shoes,” and unpack how Champion leapt from bargain bin to near-luxury through pure brand alchemy. We also get real about pain and care. A stubborn back injury, muscle relaxers that underwhelm, and a dental anxiety spiral turn into a candid look at how bodies metabolize meds differently and how policy shifts leave everyday patients managing discomfort with humor and grit. We round it out with a playful self-audit—sunshine hurricane vs. grumpy cat energy, food goblin joy, and the thrill of spending when it’s finally allowed—that doubles as a friendship map. If you love culture decoded with heart and side-eye, this one’s for you. Hit play, then tell us: have you met your doppelganger, and which trend would you retire tomorrow? Subscribe, share with a friend who swears they saw your twin, and leave a review to help more listeners find the show. - Support the show

    53 min

  4. JAN 13

    Why “I Saw A Bird Today” Can Reveal Who Really Listens

    Send us a text A bagel, a backache, and a bold claim: attention is the real love language. We kick off the new year by setting a concrete fitness goal and running straight into the toughest part—dessert. It’s not just about calories; it’s about ritual, comfort, and why “healthy” swaps flop when they miss the itch you’re trying to scratch. That same theme of attention shows up in dating, where a 30‑minute drive somehow becomes a bill for dinner, tickets, and a bed. We unpack entitlement, first‑date rules that keep you safe, and how to spot a walking red flag before you’re stuck cleaning up the mess. In the middle of all that, we celebrate a quiet win: 45 countries and 300+ cities tuning in. It didn’t happen by accident. Consistency, encore episodes, and simple systems beat perfection every time, especially when ADHD and autistic traits shape how we plan, remember, and communicate. Memory gaps aren’t laziness—they’re nervous systems doing triage—so we build structures that let us be ourselves and still deliver. Then we put the Bird Theory to the test. Send “I saw a bird today,” and watch how someone answers. Do they ask what kind? Where? Why it mattered? Curiosity is a micro‑green flag you can feel. We also draw a clean line between love bombing and being truly spoiled. Fireworks fade; rhythm lasts. Thoughtful acts without strings feel different from grand gestures that vanish after the chase. And yes, we finally explain why winking is a communication nightmare for some of us—mixed signals are noise, not romance. If you’re rethinking who gets your time, your energy, and your stories, you’ll feel seen. Press play, share this with a friend who deserves better dates, and tell us: what reply to “I saw a bird today” wins you over? Subscribe, leave a quick review, and drop your favorite micro‑green flags—we’ll read the best ones on air. - Support the show

    54 min

  5. JAN 5

    Common Law, Common Chaos, And Why Your Sourdough Has Better Boundaries Than Your Ex

    Send us a text A loaf of sourdough, a misplaced Princess Bride quote, and a very real question: if marriage isn’t about survival anymore, what makes it worth choosing? We pull on that thread and follow it through a century of norms and numbers, from the 1920s peak to the long decline since the 1970s—and the cultural shifts that explain it. Along the way, we weigh what changes when you marry in your 20s versus your 40s, how women’s financial independence reframed commitment, and why cohabitation and common law feel like marriage without the vows. We get practical and a little personal. Dating with intention means saying the quiet parts out loud—kids or no kids, timeline to engagement, views on money, fidelity, and living arrangements. We talk about the power dynamics of moving into someone else’s house, why some of us would elope instead of hosting a spectacle, and how to spot the difference between a rough patch and a pattern. Effort is the heartbeat of a lasting bond, but effort needs direction: agree on what partnership looks like day to day, not just on the wedding day. And yes, the “ick” is real, but so are ebbs and flows; good relationships survive storms because both people keep showing up. There’s space here for hope, even after grief, betrayal, and canceled weddings. Choosing marriage now is less about necessity and more about alignment, equity, and shared meaning. If you’re navigating the shrinking dating pool, balancing kids and careers, or wondering whether rates will rebound as values shift back toward tradition, this conversation is for you. Listen, reflect, and tell us: what’s your non-negotiable for saying yes to forever? If you enjoyed this, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a review to help more listeners find us. - Support the show

    57 min

  6. 12/29/2025

    A Delivery Driver Cheats Death On An Icy Driveway And Finds Humanity In A Stranger’s Living Room

    Send us a text A wave that hits back. A driveway made of glass. A blizzard saved mid-air like it’s the last precious thing on earth. Today we let the chaos breathe and trace the thin line between comedy and catastrophe—from cult-movie tangents to the debut of The Driver Chronicles, where gig work, winter roads, and human kindness collide. We start with taste: why some “bad” movies are beautifully honest while others just miss. That opens the door to something more vulnerable—a back that won’t cooperate, the stubborn ache of an SI joint, and how quickly injury scrambles goals and identity. We talk through practical fixes and the deeper truth that movement is medicine. Trauma doesn’t just live in memory; it nests in muscle and fascia. Walking and talking becomes a ritual, not a hack, and rest stops being a punishment. Then the map goes off-road. A DoorDash night turns slapstick with black ice and a full-body wipeout that still protects someone’s Dairy Queen order. A Walmart route becomes a controlled slide down an icy hill toward a rock wall, ending in a perfect clearing and a knock at the door. Inside are two retirees, a warm living room, and a bag of de-icer that saves more than time. Along the way we bump into the modern supply chain’s strangest corners: locked cases for intimate products, an earnest associate making small talk about normalization, and the reality that people buy what they need, when they need it. Add in apartment mazes, hospital drop-offs, hotel valet wins, a locked-keys AAA rescue, and a cash tip handed out in the cold, and you get a portrait of gig work that’s equal parts grit and grace. This one is messy, human, and oddly uplifting. We don’t offer a hero story; we offer a real one. If you’ve ever white-knuckled your way through a problem, laughed so you wouldn’t cry, or found unexpected help at the exact right moment, you’ll hear yourself in this. Press play, ride along, and tell us your wildest delivery or winter-driving story. If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review—your words help more people find us. - Support the show

    57 min

  7. 12/22/2025

    Modern Traditional: Choosing Monogamy In A Mix-And-Match Dating World

    Send us a text Dating today can feel like a grab bag: monogamy, polyamory, open relationships, friends with benefits, even lavender marriages. We’ve sampled the spectrum, lived through some wild chapters, and come out choosing “modern traditional”—a partnership built on exclusivity, clear roles, and mutual respect, without giving up autonomy, careers, or a voice at home. Think: you cook, I’ll do the dishes; you fix the car, I’ll pack the lunch; we both show up, and we both have a say. We open with the terms people toss around—polyamory versus polygamy, open dynamics, beard relationships—and then get personal. One of us has a family history of polygamy that shaped how we view choice and consent. The other navigates widowhood and co‑parenting in a culture that moves fast and judges faster. From there we dig into asexual seasons after bad relationships, why kissing is an underrated compatibility test, and how great sex can blur boundaries while bad sex can erode a good match. We’re honest about friends with benefits, why it so often tilts lopsided, and how to stop mistaking chemistry for commitment. Our practical takeaways are simple and sturdy. Try the 90‑day rule to see past the honeymoon gloss—most façades crack by eight weeks. Watch patterns, not promises: communication, effort, consistency. Set roles you both actually want; split work by strengths; keep space for separate hobbies while making each other the clear priority. We don’t think masculinity is toxic by default, and we’re not reenacting the 1950s. We’re aiming for a relationship you can live in every day, where attention is obvious, intimacy is mutual, and decisions are shared. If you’re rethinking your relationship style or ready to align your values with your dating choices, this one’s for you. Hit play, share it with a friend, and tell us where you land. Subscribe for more candid, unfiltered conversations, and leave a review to help others find the show. - Support the show

    46 min

  8. 12/18/2025 · BONUS

    ENCORE: Shelf Titties, Googly Eyes, And Other Cautionary Tales

    Send us a text ENCORE EPISODE RECORDED 1/12/21 Start with a laugh, stay for the honesty. We take a candid tour through the world of boobs—how asymmetry is normal, why fitness often shrinks volume, and what actually happens when you choose implants. From puberty hopes and pregnancy curveballs to post-baby realities, we unpack the expectations that shape how women feel in their skin. Then we get practical about surgery: choosing a qualified surgeon over a bargain, sizing with restraint, understanding incision options, and why warranties and the 10-year mark matter more than most people think. Our guest, David (@dm.shoots2), is a photographer who’s seen more varieties of breasts than most doctors’ brochures. He breaks down what looks natural on camera, how placement and material affect the final look on lean bodies, and the truth about “cheap” work that leads to shelf lines and rippling. We compare saline deflation to silicone’s slower leaks, debate over-the-muscle vs under-the-muscle, and talk capsular contracture, recovery discipline, and the surprising ways clothing and confidence shift after surgery. There’s a creator economy angle too. Social platforms push tame versions of boudoir while real demand lives on OnlyFans and Patreon. We talk licensing, exclusivity, and how photographers and models build ethical, profitable systems that respect consent, comfort, and creative control. Through it all, one theme holds: every breast is unique. Even with the same surgeon and implant, bodies tell their own stories. The winning strategy is choosing the look that fits your life—natural slope or full projection, subtle side boob or bold upper pole—and owning it without apology. Want more candid conversations about body image, cosmetic choices, and confidence you can actually use? Follow, share with a friend, and leave a review to tell us what questions you want answered next. - Support the show

    1h 4m
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Ratings & Reviews

4
out of 5
4 Ratings

About

We Are Not the Same: Join our comedic journey as Bodybuilder Barbie flexes her muscles against Daria’s dry wit! Dive into the hilarity of life’s twists and turns through the eyes of two contrasting besties who prove that different perspectives lead to the best stories. Tune in for laughs, randomness, and a sprinkle of chaos! 

Information

  • Creator
    Heather Gardner and Lacey Joseph
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    62
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 we are NOT the SAME
  • Show Website
    we are NOT the SAME