Coaching for Leaders

Dave Stachowiak

Leaders aren’t born; they’re made. Many leaders reach points in their careers where what worked yesterday doesn’t work today. This Monday show helps leaders thrive at these key inflection points. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak shares insights from a decade of leading a global leadership academy, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. Bestselling authors, proven leaders, expert thinkers, and deep conversation have attracted 50 million downloads and over 300,000 followers. Join the FREE membership to search the entire leadership and management library by topic at CoachingforLeaders.com

  1. 1d ago

    How to Work with Poisonous People, with Leanne ten Brinke

    Leanne ten Brinke: Poisonous People Leanne ten Brinke is an Associate Professor at the University of British Columbia, where she directs the Truth and Trust Lab. Her research investigates trust, deception, and dark personality traits across diverse populations—from incarcerated individuals to hedge fund managers and politicians. She reveals how dark personality traits shape our institutions and relationships, while offering practical strategies to recognize and counteract their harmful influence. Her book is titled Poisonous People: How to Resist Them and Improve Your Life (Amazon, Bookshop)*. If you are a leader, you are going to deal with poisonous people. Sometimes they will show up as clients, sometimes your boss, sometimes your peers, and sometimes the people you manage. Regardless of where they show up, this conversation with Leanne will help you handle this tough dynamic. Key Points Dark traits exist on a spectrum. While only 1% of the population rises to a clinical level of psychopathology, 10-20% of the population has a dark personality profile. There are many more people with psychopathy per capita in senior management positions than in the general population. Poisonous people generally aren’t interested in shifting their personality. As such, you will not change them. Given that reality, aim to better manage the relationship. Establish clear boundaries with poisonous people and put things in writing you might normally assume. Dark personalities are really good at exploiting unspoken norms. Find ways to create win-wins with poisonous people. They don’t do well with trade-offs, because they don’t like to lose anything. Avoid face-to-face negotiations with them. Their charm and charisma will win you over in the moment. Text-based dialogue will help you objectively negotiate better. Use the carrot instead of the stick. Reward good behavior when it happens (just not by giving them power over others). Resources Mentioned Poisonous People: How to Resist Them and Improve Your Life by Leanne ten Brinke (Amazon, Bookshop)* Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes How to Handle a Boss Who’s a Jerk, with Tom Henschel (episode 164) How to Start Better With Peers, with Michael Bungay Stanier (episode 635) How to Show Up Authentically in Tough Situations, with Andrew Brodsky (episode 727) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

    40 min
  2. Jun 15

    Better Leadership Through Humor, with Chris Duffy

    Chris Duffy: Humor Me Chris Duffy is an award-winning podcaster, comedian, and television writer. He hosts the podcast How to Be a Better Human and you can find his comedic TED talk, “How to find laughter anywhere” online. He is the author of Humor Me: How Laughing More Can Make You Present, Creative, Connected, and Happy (Amazon, Bookshop)*. It sometimes seems like someone with a good sense of humor does everything a bit better. Perhaps leadership is no different – but it’s not about landing jokes. In this episode, Chris and I explore why everyday humor is all about paying attention and generosity. Key Points Humor might not make the list of top leadership competencies, but it helps you perform every other competency better. A good sense of humor is inherently generous. Effective humor isn’t landing the perfect joke or being the center of attention. It’s noticing the humor is everyday work and bravely calling attention to it. The first pillar of cultivating humor is simply being present. Start with times you are least present and most zoned out. Zero in with a “new bathroom” frame of mind. Celebrate the bad stuff and find humor in it. By doing so, you inherently help people appreciate excellence. Resources Mentioned Humor Me: How Laughing More Can Make You Present, Creative, Connected, and Happy by Chris Duffy (Amazon, Bookshop)* Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes How to Engage With Humor, with David Nihill (episode 235) Get Better at Deep Listening, with Oscar Trimboli (episode 408) How to Genuinely Show Up for Others, with Marshall Goldsmith (episode 590) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

    39 min
  3. Jun 8

    The Problem with Reorgs and How to Do Better, with Phil Le-Brun

    Phil Le-Brun: The Octopus Organization Phil Le-Brun is an executive in residence at Amazon Web Services and a former corporate VP and international CIO at the McDonald’s Corporation. He is a sought-after speaker and has been featured in Harvard Business Review, The Wall Street Journal, and The Guardian. He is the co-author with Jana Werner of The Octopus Organization: A Guide to Thriving in a World of Continuous Transformation (Amazon, Bookshop)*. Most of us have gone through some version of a reorg. A lot of leaders have also implemented their own reorgs. Sometimes they work. Many times, they don’t. In this conversation, Phil and I discuss what goes wrong with reorgs and how we can do better. Key Points Organizations traditionally looked like the tin man from The Wizard of Oz: perfectly planned, many interchangeable parts, not flexible. An octopus organization adapts, works independently to serve the larger whole, and is innately curious. A reorg that starts with an org chart misses the complex organic connections you are unlikely to fully understand. Prioritize structural stability while building internal flexibility. Nurture the complex informal human networks that deliver value. Be honest about objectives and communicate a reorg early. Engage people by starting with smaller-scale change. Clarify the problem to be solved instead of the structural “answer.” Resources Mentioned The Octopus Organization: A Guide to Thriving in a World of Continuous Transformation by Phil Le-Brun and Jana Werner (Amazon, Bookshop)* Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes How to Get the Ideal Team Player, with Patrick Lencioni (episode 301) How to Approach a Reorg, with Claire Hughes Johnson (episode 621) How to Help Employees Handle Tough Moments, with Anthony Klotz (episode 777) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

    37 min
  4. Jun 1

    Make Your Task List Work for You, with Liane Davey

    Liane Davey: Thoughtload For the past 25 years, Liane Davey has researched and advised teams on how to achieve high performance. She is the author of You First and The Good Fight and is a regular contributor to Harvard Business Review. She is the author of the new book Thoughtload: Manage the Madness and Free Your Team to Do Great Work (Amazon, Bookshop)*. We all love to hate our task lists. However, we can do a lot better with just a bit of strategy. In this conversation, Liane and I explore how to make our task list work for us instead of against us. Key Points Often it’s not really the workload that’s crushing – it’s more so the thinking about all the workload. That’s what thoughtload is. The problem with a to-do list is that everything goes on it. Thus, to-do lists are terrible for managing your attention. Instead of one task list, keep a limited amount of tasks on three priority lists. Category 1 list: your most important outputs and outcomes. Category 2 list: what you do to help others achieve their most significant outcomes. Category 3 list: administrative stuff. Four questions determine what gets on your lists: Important (an activity that will add value to a key output or outcome)? Urgent (something with growing negative consequences if you wait)? Targeted (a task that no one can do as efficiently or effectively as you)? Essential (core to creating the critical value, not just a nice-to-have)? Resources Mentioned Thoughtload: Manage the Madness and Free Your Team to Do Great Work by Liane Davey (Amazon, Bookshop)* Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes The Scientific Secrets of Daily Scheduling, with Daniel Pink (episode 332) Align Your Calendar to What Matters, with Nir Eyal (episode 431) How to Take Back Your Evenings, with Guy Winch (episode 783) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

    39 min
  5. May 25

    How to Protect the Organization You Love, with Eric Ries

    Eric Ries: Incorruptible Eric Ries is the creator of the Lean Startup method, and the author of the New York Times bestseller The Lean Startup, The Leader’s Guide, and The Startup Way. Over the last two decades, his ideas about continuous innovation, long-term thinking, governance, and market reform have reshaped company building and management practices. He is the author of Incorruptible: Why Good Companies Go Bad…and How Great Companies Stay Great (Amazon, Bookshop)*. If you build a great organization, the predators will come. With the right principles in place, not only can you protect what you love, but help many people flourish because of it. In this conversation, Eric and I show you exactly where to start. Key Points Most leaders are one acquisition, one IPO, one board meeting away from seeing something they love turn into something they hate. If you build something great, they will come. The “they” are the predators who are willing to kill the golden goose. Financial gravity is the force no one controls but everyone obeys. Appreciating its realities and laws will help you build stronger. Rather than framing profit as good or bad, define profit as how you contribute to human flourishing. Harder is easier. Rather than viewing principles as a burden, the best leaders see principles as opportunities. Design the business model so the organization prospers only via mission attainment. Resources Mentioned Incorruptible: Why Good Companies Go Bad…and How Great Companies Stay Great by Eric Ries (Amazon, Bookshop)* Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes Doing Better Than Zero-Sum Thinking, with Renée Mauborgne (episode 641) Crafting the Modern Business Plan, with Seth Godin (episode 704) Notice Disruption and Innovate Through It, with Steve Blank (episode 761) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

    38 min
  6. May 18

    How to Take Back Your Evenings, with Guy Winch

    Guy Winch: Mind Over Grind Guy Winch is a psychologist and bestselling author who advocates for integrating the science of emotional health into our daily lives. His TED talks have attracted over 35 million views, and his books have been translated into more than 30 languages. He is co-host of the Ambie-nominated Dear Therapists podcast and the author of the book Mind Over Grind: How to Break Free When Work Hijacks Your Life (Amazon, Bookshop)*. Some of our parents got to work in the morning, put in a full day, and then by dinner time, didn’t think about work or do it until the next morning. That’s not reality for a lot of us today, so in this conversation, Guy and I explore what you can do to take back your evenings. Key Points Most work stress isn’t experienced at work. Healthy thinking is intentional and leads us somewhere useful. Unhealthy thinking (rumination) isn’t intentional and tends to repeat the same script. It feels more like unpaid work. To interrupt rumination outside of work, first label it and then associate it with disgust, disdain, and annoyance. Treat it like you would a skunk sitting next to you on the couch. Rituals help our brains make a distinction between time to work and time to recover. Rituals are most powerful when they invoke one or more of our five senses to signal a shift to our brains. Often we think of relaxation and recovery the same way our grandparents did who often did more manual work. Work today tends to be more mental and emotional, so indexing on ways to engage physically during recovery times is helpful. Rather than just assuming that doing nothing, sitting on a beach, or seeing the sights is the best vacation, consider engaging in the things you love that you normally don’t get to do. Resources Mentioned Mind Over Grind: How to Break Free When Work Hijacks Your Life by Guy Winch (Amazon, Bookshop)* Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes Align Your Calendar to What Matters, with Nir Eyal (episode 431) What to Do With Your Feelings, with Lori Gottlieb (episode 438) How High Achievers Begin to Find Balance, with Michael Hyatt (episode 522) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

    39 min
  7. May 11

    How to Help a Team Get Unstuck, with Gustavo Razzetti

    Gustavo Razzetti: Forward Talk Gustavo Razzetti is a culture change instigator, speaker, and CEO of Fearless Culture, a culture design consultancy. He helps leaders build teams that talk about what matters—even when it’s uncomfortable–through his books and tools, including the Culture Design Canvas. He is the author of Forward Talk: The Bold New Method for Getting Teams Unstuck (Amazon, Bookshop)*. The beauty of a team is that we can get so much more done with collaboration. It also means that sometimes we surrender our responsibility to others. In this conversation, Gustavo and I explore what to do when a team gets stuck. Key Points Conversations are the foundation of collaboration. Without them, teams quickly build conversational debt. We don’t stay silent because we’re scared. Rather, we stay quiet because we surrender our responsibility to others. Many of us overestimate our courage. We believe that we’ll say something, but studies show that often we do not. Forward Talk accomplishes two things: (1) addresses the real issue and (2) focuses on the future. See information as an opportunity instead of an obstacle. Courage can begin with admitting what you don’t know. Perspective is the choice to share your views instead of surrendering your judgment to social pressure. Responsibility is a commitment to understand the systemic issues instead of entering into blame. Resources Mentioned Forward Talk: The Bold New Method for Getting Teams Unstuck by Gustavo Razzetti (Amazon, Bookshop)* Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes Getting Better at Internal Communication, with Roy Schwartz (episode 687) Help Your Team Coach Each Other, with Keith Ferrazzi (episode 709) What Really Matters for Team Success, with Colin Fisher (episode 748) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

    39 min
  8. May 4

    Bonni and Dave Reflect on Recent Episodes

    Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed Bonni is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, Dean of Teaching and Learning and Professor of Business and Management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, she was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. Bonni is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide (Amazon, Bookshop)*. In this reflection episode, Bonni and I look back on recent past episodes and discuss questions, feedback, and insights that have surfaced from recent conversations. Key Points Dave responded to this question from Margaret Andrews: What does success look like for you? “You can have everything in life you want if you’ll just help enough other people get what they want.” -Zig Ziglar “Success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.” -Earl Nightingale Bonni responded to this question: What feedback have you received over the years about how your actions and behaviors impact others? Resources Mentioned To be of use by Marge Piercy Related Episodes How to Get Way Better at Accepting Feedback, with Sheila Heen (episode 143) Six Questions Every Leader Should Ask Themselves, with Margaret Andrews (episode 750) How to Lead a Meaningful Cultural Shift, with David Hutchens (episode 755) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

    40 min
4.8
out of 5
1,404 Ratings

About

Leaders aren’t born; they’re made. Many leaders reach points in their careers where what worked yesterday doesn’t work today. This Monday show helps leaders thrive at these key inflection points. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak shares insights from a decade of leading a global leadership academy, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. Bestselling authors, proven leaders, expert thinkers, and deep conversation have attracted 50 million downloads and over 300,000 followers. Join the FREE membership to search the entire leadership and management library by topic at CoachingforLeaders.com

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