A Thousand Tiny Steps Barb Higgins

As I hit the 8 year mark of Molly being gone, I think upon her legacy and what I’m doing with the MollyB Foundation to honor her. I have fundraised, supported the arts, and given scholarships to children in her honor. All of this work has helped me as I have gone on the healing journey of writing my book and dealing with nasty comments online. 
 
Key Takeaways: 
 
[2:53] 8 years since Molly died 
[5:09] Social media bringing up old memories 
[7:01] Thinking I had more time left with Molly 
[8:15] What the MollyB Foundation offers
[9:26] Having a wonderful conversation about Molly
[10:59] Fundraising for the MollyB Foundation 
[13:25] It’s tiring that people forget Molly  
[14:15] Awards that the MollyB Foundation gives out 
[14:58] Jack starting dance classes
[18:29] The nasty comments about my IVF journey online
[25:12] The process of writing my book 
[28:16] What I envision for Jack when he’s older 
[29:38] My life has changed, but still stayed the same 
 
Resources:
 
Deliver Me From Nowhere 
 
Connect with Barb:
 
Website
 
Facebook 
 
Instagram
 
Be a guest on the podcast 
 
YouTube
 
The Molly B Foundation 

As Memorial Day is upon us, it made me think back to the CrossFit workouts I’ve done in honor of people that have died. That’s what I love about CrossFit. It is not just a workout, it’s about community and supporting one another. In this episode, I look back on the heroes in my life and contemplate what commemorating someone really does. 
 
Key Takeaways: 
 
[2:00] Struggling in the month of May and a turning point 
[4:04] Books I’m reading 
[8:17] The importance of Memorial Day and CrossFit 
[10:25] The hero workout, Murf 
[13:38] The article I wrote for Memorial Day 
[17:49] Finding community to help me through trauma 
[18:39] Finding the meaning in life 
[21:14] The workout that was made in Molly’s honor 
[23:26] Pondering what fighting for freedom really is 
[24:13] The heroes in my life and commemorating my child 
[26:01] What is your community?
 
Resources:
 
Soul Boom 
Deliver Me From Nowhere 
The article I wrote on Murf
The article I wrote on Blake 
 
Connect with Barb:
 
Website
 
Facebook 
 
Instagram
 
Be a guest on the podcast 
 
YouTube
 
The Molly B Foundation 

As I wade through death week, I reflect on my grief, how it’s changed and what’s next for the podcast. The podcast has allowed me to work on healing myself and now it’s also going to be a space for other people to share their stories. If you would like to be a guest on the show, please fill out the guest form in the show notes.
 
Key Takeaways: 
 
[1:14] Being angry during death week 
[3:44] Learning more about hormones and trauma 
[6:43] Feeling like I killed Molly 
[9:08] Learning from looking back on my life 
[10:56] My life growing up 
[13:17] What’s next for the podcast 
[17:26] Talking about child abuse, chronic pain, and more
[22:40] Grief and child loss will be a huge focus 
[24:15] Learning ways to be grateful 
[25:43] Working to heal myself 
[27:13] Life updates and coaching CrossFit 
 
Resources:
 
Get Better Girl
Guest Form
 
Connect with Barb:
 
Website
 
Facebook 
 
Instagram
 
Be a guest on the podcast 
 
YouTube
 
The Molly B Foundation 

I have been working to find gratitude in everything I do, even when life feels terrible. Finding the good in tragedy has always been something I’m good at and I’m only trying to do that more everyday. In this episode, I contemplate how my life could have been different had I made different choices and the gratitude I feel now. 
 
Key Takeaways: 
 
[1:06] An important quote on gratitude 
[3:19] Having gratitude for the 2000s 
[5:00] I’m grateful that I was able to spend time with my kids 
[6:42] Working at VLACs and having a flexible schedule 
[8:17] Finding such empowerment in CrossFit 
[9:13] The people I’ve met through CrossFit
[11:10] The flip side of wanting to rewind time 
[12:00] The things that wouldn’t of happened without meeting Roy 
[13:36] Wanting to go back in time to have a do-over
[15:29] Realizing I need to open up by doing this podcast 
[17:50] I wonder how my life could have been different 
[18:59] I should feel grateful all the time 
[20:40] Looking to the future of the podcast 
 
Resources:
 
Homeless to Harvard 
Case 63 podcast
Label Free Podcast
 
Connect with Barb:
 
Website
 
Facebook 
 
Instagram
 
YouTube
 
The Molly B Foundation
 

In this episode, I look back on the podcast interviews I’ve had and the amazing people I’ve met along the way in my grief journey. It’s interesting to see what people remain and the ones who do not as I grieve. I think the most important thing I’ve learned is that helping others is sometimes the best thing I can do for my grief. 
 
Key Takeaways: 
 
[2:57] What is the universe trying to tell me?
[5:45] Being on the Shenanigans podcast
[6:27] Christine, a wonderful mother also in grief 
[7:34] Being on the Vintage Mamas podcast
[8:45] Connecting with other women entrepreneurs 
[9:20] Sharing my experience being an older mother
[10:37] Having wonderful, funny conversations with hosts
[12:27] Talking to men about mental health and grief 
[13:45] The powerful podcasts I’ve been listening to 
[15:38] People don’t understand how to be supportive in grief 
[17:04] People have tried to silence me
[18:04] The amazing people I’ve met in grief  
[19:32] Helping others is sometimes the best thing to do
[22:00] Feeling lost on where to go from here 
 
Resources:
 
Shenanigans 
Why Not Devin?
Vintage Mama podcast
Legends and Legacies 
Things that Make You Go… Mmm 
Label Free Podcast
Introducing Me 
I Didn’t Sign Up For This
Kintsugi Heroes Project  
Three Siblings 
The Last Day
Flowers By The Nest 
Ellie’s Way 
OK Yup
Get Ready To Crumbl
Karen Kenney Show
The CrossFit Lady 
 
Connect with Barb:
 
Website
 
Facebook 
 
Instagram
 
YouTube
 
The Molly B Foundation 

As my relationship with Roy ended I mourned that I never received closure from it. I sometimes saw him as a thorny lifeline. I saw the women he dated throughout the years and maintained contact with him until another restraining order came into the picture. 
 
Key Takeaways: 
 
[3:23] Not getting closure from my relationship 
[5:20] Meeting Roy for lunch
[8:23] Roy’s relationship with Lori
[10:06] Pulling the dead kid card
[12:57] Roy didn’t want anyone knowing about us 
[14:31] Looking at Roy as a lifeline 
[17:38] Being able to talk to Kenny without judgment
[19:02] Hearing about the women Roy was dating
[21:59] Starting the IVF process and talking about having kids 
[25:15] I just wanted closure 
[26:48] Nasty emails between us 
[28:41] The restraining order 
[33:14] Just wanting to be a good mother 
[35:09] Where my life is at
 
Connect with Barb:
 
Website
 
Facebook 
 
Instagram
 
YouTube
 
The Molly B Foundation