230 episodes

"Absolutely not" to legitimately everything.....Comedian Heather McMahan creates a safe-space for us to tell-all and bitch about the rest. No topics are off-limits as we break down the everyday struggles of doing the most, and the least, at the same damn time. Come for the humor, authentic discussion or call in the Hotline or should we say "Absolutely NOT-Line" with your life complaints. We will discuss it all. It's a joyful take on life's craziest moments.

Absolutely Not Dear Media

    • Comedy
    • 4.9 • 13.1K Ratings

"Absolutely not" to legitimately everything.....Comedian Heather McMahan creates a safe-space for us to tell-all and bitch about the rest. No topics are off-limits as we break down the everyday struggles of doing the most, and the least, at the same damn time. Come for the humor, authentic discussion or call in the Hotline or should we say "Absolutely NOT-Line" with your life complaints. We will discuss it all. It's a joyful take on life's craziest moments.

    Your Rich BFF with Vivian Tu

    Your Rich BFF with Vivian Tu

    Your favorite Wall Street girlie, Vivian Tu, is on the podcast to teach you everything about how to make money, how to keep it, and how to make more. New money b*tches - this one’s for you.




    Episode Sponsors:




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    Right now, Modern Fertility is offering my listeners $20 off the test when you go to ModernFertility.com/absolutely




    Catch new episodes of The Kardashians on Thursdays, streaming only on Hulu.




    Treat yourself to the best shape wear on the market and save 20% off at honeylove.com/absolutely




    Discover new ways to shop for everything, every day, at Saks.com




    Shop all my favorites at loveamika.com/ABSOLUTELY and get 20% off your order.




    Produced by Dear Media




    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    • 1 hr 7 min
    It Doesn't Take a Village

    It Doesn't Take a Village

    On this episode of the Absolutely Not Podcast- Heather is reporting live from Canal Street after yet another wild leg of the tour. There must have been something in the water because the weekend had everything including a 12-year-old popping up at a show, strip teases, and an episode of cops (but in real life), and that's only the beginning. Judging by the Absolutely Not-Line it looks like everyone else's weekend was just as unhinged.




    Episode Sponsors:




    Shop all my favorites at loveamika.com/ABSOLUTELY and get 20% off your order.




    For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering is offering my listeners $10 off your first month's subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT




    Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get $5 off of your Starter Pack (that's over 40% off) with promo code [ABSOLUTELY] at lumepodcast.com




    Discover new ways to shop for everything, every day, at Saks.com




    Treat yourself to the best shapewear on the market and save 20% Off at honeylove.com/ABSOLUTELY




    Produced by Dear Media

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    • 1 hr 5 min
    Shakin' T*ts for Cash on Netflix

    Shakin' T*ts for Cash on Netflix

    On this episode of the Absolutely Not Podcast- Heather is finally able to make a HUGE announcement: she’s coming to Netflix baby! That’s right, her new comedy special, The Son I Never Had, is coming to a couch near you on October 17th. In the midst of the celebration she’s still taking time to hit the Absolutely Not Line to show some much-needed love to the theaters teachers, draw the hard line between making new friends and borderline stalking, and whether or not you should shoot your shot at a new sky boo.




    Episode Sponsors:




    Shop all my favorites at loveamika.com/ABSOLUTELY and get 20% off your order.




    Head to Squarespace.com/absolutely to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domaine using code ABSOLUTELY




    Visit in-store or online at Brooklinen.com and use code absolutelysnot for $20 off your online order of $100 or more.




    Try AG1 and get a free 1-year supply of Vitamin D and 5 Free AG1 Travel Packs with your first purchase at drinkag1.com/absolutely




    This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhep.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way of being your best self.




    Get 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food at TheFarmersDog.com/absolutely




    Produced by Dear Media

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    • 59 min
    "F*ck Season" with Jared Freid

    "F*ck Season" with Jared Freid

    On this episode of the Absolutely Not Podcast - Heather is back with friend of the pod, Jared Freid. They talk about his hilarious new Netflix special, 37 and Single, and Jared gives some sage dating advice on the proper way to hook your friends up, the best time of day to go out and find the right guy and more to get you prepped for the season.




    Episode Sponsors:




    Right now, BÉIS is offering my listeners 15% off your first purchase by visiting BEISTRAVEL.com/absolutely




    Right now, Modern Fertility is offering my listeners $20 off the test when you go to ModernFertility.com/absolutely




    Try AG1 and get a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 Free AG1 Travel Packs with your first purchase at drinkAG1.com/ABSOLUTELY




    The Fits Everybody collection and more perfect-fit essentials are available now at SKIMS.com. Plus, get free shipping on orders over $75.




    Get 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food plus free shipping at TheFarmersDog.com/absolutely




    Shop all my favorites at loveamika.com/ABSOLUTELY and get 20% off your order.




    Produced by Dear Media







    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    • 1 hr 4 min
    Hot Takes with Heather

    Hot Takes with Heather

    On this episode of the Absolutely Not Podcast, Heather's jumps into the Instagram DMs to answer your burning questions, and talk through a dab of trauma. She also hits the hotline to prove once again that she may not always have the answers, but she'll always figure it out.




    Episode Sponsors:




    Head to Squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY.




    For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering my listeners ten dollars off your first month's subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.




    Visit DelolaLife.com to find a store near you that carries Della and follow @Deolola on instagram to learn more.




    Download the Drizly app or go to Drizly.com and use code ABSOLUTELY to receive $5 off or $0 delivery fee off your next order.




    Get 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food at TheFarmersDog.com/absolutely, plus, you get FREE shipping.




    Treat yourself to the best shapewear on the market and save 20% off at honeylove.com/absolutely




    Produced by Dear Media







    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    • 1 hr 12 min
    JACQUELINE & The Wiener Circle

    JACQUELINE & The Wiener Circle

        On this episode of the Absolutely Not Podcast, Heather is home from her Tour-de-America. Her feet may be swollen, but she's got a real pep in her step after being dressed down by a large woman selling Wiener's in Chicago. She hits the hotline to answer questions like "what to do if you find out your mother-in-law has an alter ego in the bedroom?" and how to fall out of love with your Catholic priest.




    Episode Sponsors:




    If you want to take ownership of your health, try AG1 and get a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D and 5 Free AG1 Travel Packs with your first purchase at drinkAG1.com/ABSOLUTELY




    Right now, Ibotta is offering our listeners $5 just for trying Ibotta by using the code absolutely when you register. Just go to the App Store or Google Play store and download the FREE Ibotta app and use code absolutely.




    Download the Drizly app or go to Drizly.com and use code ABSOLUTELY to receive $5 off or $0 delivery fee off your next order.




    Get 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food plus free shipping at TheFarmersDog.com/absolutely




    Right now, modern Fertility is offering my listeners $20 off the test when you go to ModernFertility.com/absolutely




    Right now, BÉIS is offering my listeners 15% off your first purchase by visiting BEISTRAVEL.com/absolutely




    Produced by Dear Media







    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    • 1 hr 17 min

Customer Reviews

4.9 out of 5
13.1K Ratings

13.1K Ratings

ConnieBachman ,

Winner!

Heather kills it with every pod cast. She makes me laugh so hard. I look forward to hearing them from now on!❤️❤️

JanaBum31 ,

Heather is the BEST

Heather is hilarious and real! I look forward to this podcast every week❤️.

apTTU07 ,

The only thing keeping me going in the office

Heather keeps me giggling while my company is forcing me back in the office. I enjoy listening to her to avoid small talk from my co-workers. Love and light

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