Grab your daddy tissues, girls — Chapter Two starts in a basket of dirty laundry. Last week ended with one word on the morning of my 18th birthday: pregnant. This week you get the whole story — five positive tests and a due date instead of a keg party, the get-out-of-jail-free card his sister put on the table, and the reason I couldn't take it: a psychic with a glass eye, a miracle baby, and my mother's voice from a random Tuesday in our kitchen. Then I climb into a laundry basket in a cold Northeast Philly cellar, too scared to speak — and my mom turns around and says the two words I never got to say. What happens after that is nine months of everything falling apart in slow motion: a father who went silent, a boy who wasn't who I thought he was, one accidental phone call that told me everything, and a "perfect" family whose foundation I never checked before I moved my whole life onto it. And it ends in the one place nobody — NOBODY — knows a guy for. Chapter Three drops next Monday. In this episode: • Five positive tests, one due date, zero keg parties — happy 18th birthday to me • The get-out-of-jail-free card — and the kitchen memory that wouldn't let me use it • Mr. D, the psychic with the glass eye, and the two baby girls he called before I existed • The laundry basket — "Are you mad at me?" and the answer that decided everything • Nine months of silence: the first time I was ever a disappointment • The butt-dial that told me the truth — "there are things she doesn't need to know" • Nine months pregnant, stone sober, chasing a car down the highway (yes, there was a cop) • "She already made one mistake — why is she gonna make two?" My mother's finest sentence • Daddy Tissues University: CURB APPEAL — why you never buy the house on the shutters alone • You're Not Crazy: the victim game, and why the truth-teller always ends up apologizing Every name in this story is changed. Every single one. The people don't matter — the pattern matters. 💸 SUPPORT THE SHOW — THE SWEAR JAR Every "f**k" costs me a quarter. Bail me out here: https://daddy-tissues.captivate.fm/support ⭐ LEAVE A REVIEW That helps more than you know. It tells the algorithm that this white trash right here is worth listening to. Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/daddy-tissues/id1896925409 Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/daddy-tissues-6514529 🎧 LISTEN + FOLLOW Everywhere: https://daddy-tissues.captivate.fm/listen Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/033ygF97LFxvu3ZpHysLMb Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/daddy-tissues/id1896925409 📱 SOCIALS Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/daddy.tissues.podcast TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTSHPhqwR/ YouTube: https://youtube.com/@daddy.tissues.podcast?si=aqBSaaS0zYP_VPrw Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/1ECbqyrWpk/?mibextid=wwXIfr Music: "Do It Anyway" by Scarlett Solo (licensed) Daddy Tissues is a personal storytelling podcast for entertainment, reflection, and connection — not legal, medical, financial, or mental health advice. Take care of yourself. Names and identifying details may be changed or omitted to protect privacy. PREVIOUS EPISODES (for reference / episode links)I'm F*cking Doing ThisThe RootsThe Boiling FrogLet's Get HighOPI Don't LieWhite TrashChapter 1: Who is Vicky?Chapter 2 ← this one CHECKLIST BEFORE YOU HIT PUBLISH[ ] ElevenLabs-enhanced audio uploaded (the MP3, not the raw Descript file)[ ] Title picked and entered[ ] Show notes pasted (all links real — no placeholders)[ ] Tip link works — test it: https://daddy-tissues.captivate.fm/support[ ] Explicit = ON[ ] Scheduled: Mon Jul 20, 4:00 AM[ ] 🚨 Lawyer read done (or ⚠ beats softened) — your rule for the Neighbor's chapters[ ] AFTER scheduling: clips (locked order of ops — episode → schedule → clips) EPISODE 8 — CAPTIVATE UPLOAD KITCopy-paste each field below into the Captivate episode form. Episode TitleChapter 2: Are You Mad at Me? (Gina — you never picked, so this is the default. Alternates: "Chapter 2: The Get-Out-of-Jail-Free Card" or "Chapter 2: The Laundry Basket." If you change it, change it in the Title field only — nothing below depends on it.) Episode Number / SeasonEpisode 8 (Season 1) Show Notes (paste into the description box)Grab your daddy tissues, girls — Chapter Two starts in a basket of dirty laundry. Last week ended with one word on the morning of my 18th birthday: pregnant. This week you get the whole story — five positive tests and a due date instead of a keg party, the get-out-of-jail-free card his sister put on the table, and the reason I couldn't take it: a psychic with a glass eye, a miracle baby, and my mother's voice from a random Tuesday in our kitchen. Then I climb into a laundry basket in a cold Northeast Philly cellar, too scared to speak — and my mom turns around and says the two words I never got to say. What happens after that is nine months of everything falling apart in slow motion: a father who went silent, a boy who wasn't who I thought he was, one accidental phone call that told me everything, and a "perfect" family whose foundation I never checked before I moved my whole life onto it. And it ends in the one place nobody — NOBODY — knows a guy for. Chapter Three drops next Monday. In this episode: • Five positive tests, one due date, zero keg parties — happy 18th birthday to me • The get-out-of-jail-free card — and the kitchen memory that wouldn't let me use it • Mr. D, the psychic with the glass eye, and the two baby girls he called before I existed • The laundry basket — "Are you mad at me?" and the answer that decided everything • Nine months of silence: the first time I was ever a disappointment • The butt-dial that told me the truth — "there are things she doesn't need to know" • Nine months pregnant, stone sober, chasing a car down the highway (yes, there was a cop) • "She already made one mistake — why is she gonna make two?" My mother's finest sentence • Daddy Tissues University: CURB APPEAL — why you never buy the house on the shutters alone • You're Not Crazy: the victim game, and why the truth-teller always ends up apologizing Every name in this story is changed. Every single one. The people don't matter — the pattern matters. 💸 SUPPORT THE SHOW — THE SWEAR JAR Every "f**k" costs me a quarter. Bail me out here: https://daddy-tissues.captivate.fm/support ⭐ LEAVE A REVIEW That helps more than you know. It tells the algorithm that this white trash right here is worth listening to. Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/daddy-tissues/id1896925409 Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/daddy-tissues-6514529 🎧 LISTEN + FOLLOW Everywhere: https://daddy-tissues.captivate.fm/listen Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/033ygF97LFxvu3ZpHysLMb Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/daddy-tissues/id1896925409 📱 SOCIALS Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/daddy.tissues.podcast TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTSHPhqwR/ YouTube: https://youtube.com/@daddy.tissues.podcast?si=aqBSaaS0zYP_VPrw Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/1ECbqyrWpk/?mibextid=wwXIfr Music: "Do It Anyway" by Scarlett Solo (licensed) Daddy Tissues is a personal storytelling podcast for entertainment, reflection, and connection — not legal, medical, financial, or mental health advice. Take care of yourself. Names and identifying details may be changed or omitted to protect privacy. Episode TypeFull (not trailer/bonus) ExplicitYES — mark explicit (swearing throughout) Publish SettingSchedule for Monday, July 20 at 4:00 AM via Captivate PREVIOUS EPISODES (for reference / episode links)I'm F*cking Doing ThisThe RootsThe Boiling FrogLet's Get HighOPI Don't LieWhite TrashChapter 1: Who is Vicky?Chapter 2 ← this one CHECKLIST BEFORE YOU HIT PUBLISH[ ] ElevenLabs-enhanced audio uploaded (the MP3, not the raw Descript file)[ ] Title picked and entered[ ] Show notes pasted (all links real — no placeholders)[ ] Tip link works — test it: https://daddy-tissues.captivate.fm/support[ ] Explicit = ON[ ] Scheduled: Mon Jul 20, 4:00 AM[ ] 🚨 Lawyer read done (or ⚠ beats softened) — your rule for the Neighbor's chapters[ ] AFTER scheduling: clips (locked order of ops — episode → schedule → clips) Follow & share: New episodes of Daddy Tissues drop every Monday. If this one hit a nerve, send it to the friend and follow so you never miss one. Connect with Daddy Tissues: Follow along for more brutally honest conversations about dating, divorce, motherhood, daddy issues, toxic relationships, healing, self-worth, and all the emotional junk we somehow inherited without asking for it. Music: "Do It Anyway" by Scarlett Solo, used under license. Disclaimer: This podcast is for entertainment and personal storytelling purposes only. It is not therapy, legal advice, medical advice, or a replacement for professional support. If you are in an unsafe relationship or crisis situation, please reach out to a qualified professional or local support service.