Hey Tabi!

Tabitha

Welcome to "Hey Tabi!" the podcast where we talk about the hard things out loud, with our actual lips. We'll cover all kinds of topics across the mental health spectrum, including how it intersects with the Christian faith. Nothing is off limits here & we are not "take-two-verses-and-call-me-in-the-morning."I'm Tabitha Westbrook & I'm a licensed trauma therapist (but I'm not your trauma therapist). I'm an expert in domestic abuse & coercive control & how complex trauma impacts our health & well-being. Our focus here is knowledge & healing - trauma doesn't have to eat your lunch forever. There is hope! Now, let's get going!How to connect:https://www.tabithawestbrook.com/Therapy Website: (We are able to see clients in NC & TX)https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/Instagram:@tabithathecounselor@_tjatpDisclaimer: This podcast is not therapy & is for informational purposes only. If you need therapy I encourage you to find an awesome therapist licensed where you are that can help you out!!

  1. 2d ago

    I needed this reminder of God's Goodness

    Have you ever found yourself wondering where God's goodness is in the middle of a painful season? In this special episode of Hey Tabi, Tabitha Westbrook shares a devotional originally presented at a women's retreat centered around one powerful verse from Psalm 27: "Yet I am confident I will see the Lord's goodness while I am here in the land of the living." Rather than looking at the verse in isolation, Tabitha walks through the entire Psalm, exploring how David wrestled with fear, enemies, uncertainty, and waiting on God while still choosing confidence. Through personal stories, biblical insight, and practical encouragement, this message offers hope for anyone navigating trauma, grief, coercive control, difficult relationships, anxiety, or spiritual exhaustion. If you've struggled to trust God's presence in hard seasons, you'll be reminded that God is near, that He holds His children close, and that even in the midst of suffering there are still pockets of beauty, delight, and evidence of His goodness. In this video, you'll learn: • What Psalm 27 teaches about fear and courage • How to recognize God's goodness during difficult seasons • Why waiting on the Lord requires courage • Practical ways to focus on what is good, lovely, and true • Encouragement for trauma survivors and those healing from difficult relationships Wanna say hi? Send a text!  This book is for every Christian woman who has been harmed sexually, whether that happened in childhood, adulthood, or even within your coercive controlling marriage, and you're longing to feel safe in your body again. We talk about the hard stuff, shame, desire, faith, and even questions like, is this sin or is this trauma?You don't have to untangle it alone. Body & Soul, Healed & Whole is for you. Get a copy here today - https://a.co/d/8Jo3Z4V 👍 If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information! 📖 Order Body & Soul, Healed & Whole: An Invitational Guide to Healthy Sexuality After Trauma, Abuse, and Coercive Control Wanna support Hey Tabi? Buy me a coffee here - https://buymeacoffee.com/heytabi 📩 Connect with Tabitha & The Journey and The Process: 💻 Tabitha's Website - www.tabithawestbrook.com 📲 Tabitha's Instagram - www.instagram.com/tabithathecounselor 🎙️ Podcast Homepage - https://heytabi.buzzsprout.com 💻 The Journey & The Process Website - www.thejourneyandtheprocess.com Subscribe to our YouTube Channel & watch podcast episodes there 🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy and is intended for educational purposes only. If you're in crisis or need therapy, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional. Need to know how to find a great therapist? Read this blog post here.

    22 min
  2. Jun 8

    You Can Question God and Still Be Faithful with Elizabeth Woodson

    What happens when grief, church hurt, disappointment, and cultural pressures begin shaping our faith more than the Gospel? In this episode of Hey Tabi, Tabitha Westbrook sits down with Bible teacher, author, speaker, and podcaster Elizabeth Woodson for a rich conversation about spiritual formation, healing, discipleship, singleness, biblical literacy, and learning to trust God again after painful experiences. Elizabeth shares insights from her book Habits of Resistance: Seven Ways You're Being Formed by Culture and Gospel Practices to Help You Push Back, exploring how social media, hustle culture, comparison, and cultural pressures subtly shape believers. Together, Tabitha and Elizabeth discuss why busyness often becomes a distraction from healing, how Jesus reveals the heart of God to those struggling with church hurt, and why discipleship must move beyond information into transformation. They also dive into practical encouragement for single women, the importance of friendship and community, contentment in every season of life, accountability within church leadership, and the need for a healthier vision of discipleship in the modern church. 🔴 Connect with Elizabeth Woodson:  Habits of Resistance 📖 https://amzn.to/43allge Website ➡️ https://www.elizabethwoodson.net/ Wanna say hi? Send a text! At The Journey and The Process we strive to help you heal. Our therapists are trauma specialists who use evidence-based tools like EMDR, Brainspotting, Somatic Experiencing, and Internal Family Systems to help you heal - mind, soul, and body. Reach out today to start your healing journey. https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/ Join a vibrant community that takes you deeper into topics with a private podcast feed available on your fave podcast platform, helpful tools served right to your inbox, and quarterly Zoom calls to bring it all together! Learn more and join now -  https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/upcoming-events-groups/trauma-healing-support-online/  This book is for every Christian woman who has been harmed sexually, whether that happened in childhood, adulthood, or even within your coercive controlling marriage, and you're longing to feel safe in your body again. We talk about the hard stuff, shame, desire, faith, and even questions like, is this sin or is this trauma?You don't have to untangle it alone. Body & Soul, Healed & Whole is for you. Get a copy here today - https://a.co/d/8Jo3Z4V 👍 If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information! 📖 Order Body & Soul, Healed & Whole: An Invitational Guide to Healthy Sexuality After Trauma, Abuse, and Coercive Control Wanna support Hey Tabi? Buy me a coffee here - https://buymeacoffee.com/heytabi 📩 Connect with Tabitha & The Journey and The Process: 💻 Tabitha's Website - www.tabithawestbrook.com 📲 Tabitha's Instagram - www.instagram.com/tabithathecounselor 🎙️ Podcast Homepage - https://heytabi.buzzsprout.com 💻 The Journey & The Process Website - www.thejourneyandtheprocess.com Subscribe to our YouTube Channel & watch podcast episodes there 🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy and is intended for educational purposes only. If you're in crisis or need therapy, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional. Need to know how to find a great therapist? Read this blog post here.

    58 min
  3. Jun 1

    Why You Feel Like the “Problem” at Church

    Have you ever felt like the “problem person” at church no matter how hard you tried? In this episode of Hey Tabi, licensed trauma therapist Tabitha Westbrook explores what happens when churches unconsciously — or intentionally — scapegoat members instead of addressing dysfunction within the system itself. Tabitha also explains how church scapegoating mirrors coercive control dynamics often seen in abusive relationships — including denial, minimization, emotional punishment, social isolation, and rewriting reality. If you’ve ever: Felt spiritually unsafe in churchBeen labeled “divisive” for asking questionsLost community after speaking upExperienced church hurt after disclosing abuseFelt like leadership made you the problem instead of addressing real issues…this episode is for you. This conversation is honest, trauma-informed, compassionate, and deeply needed. Resources Mentioned: Transformational Topics Community - app.helloaudio.fm/feed/6907e1ce-23d2-4296-835e-5b478472f514/signup Healthy Relationships Online Course - Use code RESET24 for 80% off - https://taking-every-thought-captive.teachable.com/p/relationships Wanna say hi? Send a text! At The Journey and The Process we strive to help you heal. Our therapists are trauma specialists who use evidence-based tools like EMDR, Brainspotting, Somatic Experiencing, and Internal Family Systems to help you heal - mind, soul, and body. Reach out today to start your healing journey. https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/  This book is for every Christian woman who has been harmed sexually, whether that happened in childhood, adulthood, or even within your coercive controlling marriage, and you're longing to feel safe in your body again. We talk about the hard stuff, shame, desire, faith, and even questions like, is this sin or is this trauma?You don't have to untangle it alone. Body & Soul, Healed & Whole is for you. Get a copy here today - https://a.co/d/8Jo3Z4V 👍 If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information! 📖 Order Body & Soul, Healed & Whole: An Invitational Guide to Healthy Sexuality After Trauma, Abuse, and Coercive Control Wanna support Hey Tabi? Buy me a coffee here - https://buymeacoffee.com/heytabi 📩 Connect with Tabitha & The Journey and The Process: 💻 Tabitha's Website - www.tabithawestbrook.com 📲 Tabitha's Instagram - www.instagram.com/tabithathecounselor 🎙️ Podcast Homepage - https://heytabi.buzzsprout.com 💻 The Journey & The Process Website - www.thejourneyandtheprocess.com Subscribe to our YouTube Channel & watch podcast episodes there 🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy and is intended for educational purposes only. If you're in crisis or need therapy, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional. Need to know how to find a great therapist? Read this blog post here.

    34 min
  4. May 25

    You Can Love God and Still Be Done With Church (For Now)

    If worship music makes your chest tight, if opening your Bible brings more dread than comfort, if you still believe in God but can't bring yourself to darken the door of a church — this episode is for you. Church hurt is real, and it runs deep. It's not a crisis of faith. It's a wound — and like any wound, it makes sense that your body and soul have learned to protect themselves. In this episode, licensed trauma therapist Tabitha Westbrook walks through what's actually happening when church, Scripture, or spiritual practices feel threatening, and offers gentle, trauma-informed tools for the long road back to God — on your terms, at your pace. You'll hear about: Why pulling away from church after being hurt isn't spiritual failure — it's your nervous system doing its jobHow to untangle God from the institution that harmed youWhat healthy grief and anger actually look like in the spiritual lifePractical re-entry points for Scripture when your Bible feels loaded (including a surprisingly powerful tool: a children's Bible)How to know when — and how — to consider trusting a church community againWhether you were spiritually manipulated, quietly burned out, or had theology used as a weapon against you, Tabitha brings both clinical expertise and personal experience to this conversation. No toxic positivity, no pressure to "just forgive and move on." Just honest, compassionate tools for healing. "He is not mad at you because you're struggling with this. He looks at you with love." Resources mentioned: The Jesus Storybook Bible by Sally Lloyd-Jones - https://amzn.to/4nLUPTVThe Promises of God Bible by Jennifer Lyell - https://amzn.to/4fAroC7The Message (Bible translation) - https://amzn.to/4dEeeBsRestored Group Interest List — https://link.therasaas.com/widget/form/plMw2lwgpYZuDX5TXSpsTransformational Topics Community — https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/upcoming-events-groups/trauma-healing-support-online/Is My Church a Safe or High-Control Space? (Church Health Quiz) — https://tabitha.wispform.com/75ac488dWanna say hi? Send a text!  This book is for every Christian woman who has been harmed sexually, whether that happened in childhood, adulthood, or even within your coercive controlling marriage, and you're longing to feel safe in your body again. We talk about the hard stuff, shame, desire, faith, and even questions like, is this sin or is this trauma?You don't have to untangle it alone. Body & Soul, Healed & Whole is for you. Get a copy here today - https://a.co/d/8Jo3Z4V 👍 If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information! 📖 Order Body & Soul, Healed & Whole: An Invitational Guide to Healthy Sexuality After Trauma, Abuse, and Coercive Control Wanna support Hey Tabi? Buy me a coffee here - https://buymeacoffee.com/heytabi 📩 Connect with Tabitha & The Journey and The Process: 💻 Tabitha's Website - www.tabithawestbrook.com 📲 Tabitha's Instagram - www.instagram.com/tabithathecounselor 🎙️ Podcast Homepage - https://heytabi.buzzsprout.com 💻 The Journey & The Process Website - www.thejourneyandtheprocess.com Subscribe to our YouTube Channel & watch podcast episodes there 🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy and is intended for educational purposes only. If you're in crisis or need therapy, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional. Need to know how to find a great therapist? Read this blog post here.

    18 min
  5. May 11

    CBT Isn’t the Problem… But It’s Not Enough

    Licensed trauma therapist Tabitha Westbrook takes an honest look at why Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) often gets a bad rap in trauma work—and where it still holds real value. In this episode, she breaks down what CBT actually is, where it came from, and why its focus on identifying and shifting automatic thoughts can be helpful—but also deeply limited when used in a rigid, one-size-fits-all way. Tabitha explores how non–trauma-informed CBT can unintentionally minimize real harm, invalidate appropriate emotional responses, and overlook the critical roles of the nervous system, attachment wounds, dissociation, and the lived experience of the body. She also highlights more integrative “third-wave” approaches like DBT and ACT, which better account for emotional regulation and embodied experience. Importantly, she names a truth many people feel but rarely hear: some thoughts aren’t distortions—they’re accurate reflections of real pain, loss, or ongoing realities (including chronic illness), and they cannot simply be reframed away. Drawing from her work in EMDR and faith-informed identity healing, Tabitha offers a more nuanced path forward. This episode invites listeners to move beyond therapy “camps” and toward a flexible, compassionate, and effective trauma healing toolkit. Links: Transformational Topics Community - https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/upcoming-events-groups/trauma-healing-support-online/. The Beck Institute - https://beckinstitute.org/ Wanna say hi? Send a text! At The Journey and The Process we strive to help you heal. Our therapists are trauma specialists who use evidence-based tools like EMDR, Brainspotting, Somatic Experiencing, and Internal Family Systems to help you heal - mind, soul, and body. Reach out today to start your healing journey. https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/  This book is for every Christian woman who has been harmed sexually, whether that happened in childhood, adulthood, or even within your coercive controlling marriage, and you're longing to feel safe in your body again. We talk about the hard stuff, shame, desire, faith, and even questions like, is this sin or is this trauma?You don't have to untangle it alone. Body & Soul, Healed & Whole is for you. Get a copy here today - https://a.co/d/8Jo3Z4V 👍 If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information! 📖 Order Body & Soul, Healed & Whole: An Invitational Guide to Healthy Sexuality After Trauma, Abuse, and Coercive Control Wanna support Hey Tabi? Buy me a coffee here - https://buymeacoffee.com/heytabi 📩 Connect with Tabitha & The Journey and The Process: 💻 Tabitha's Website - www.tabithawestbrook.com 📲 Tabitha's Instagram - www.instagram.com/tabithathecounselor 🎙️ Podcast Homepage - https://heytabi.buzzsprout.com 💻 The Journey & The Process Website - www.thejourneyandtheprocess.com Subscribe to our YouTube Channel & watch podcast episodes there 🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy and is intended for educational purposes only. If you're in crisis or need therapy, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional. Need to know how to find a great therapist? Read this blog post here.

    34 min
  6. Apr 27

    It Wasn’t “God.” It was Spiritual Abuse.

    If you’ve been hurt by the church, struggled to trust God again, or felt confused about what’s true… you are not alone. In this powerful conversation, trauma therapist Tabitha Westbrook sits down with Rachel Clinton Chen from The Allender Center to unpack: 🚩 What spiritual abuse actually is (and why it’s so hard to name) 🚩 How abuse distorts your view of God, yourself, and relationships 🚩 Why so many people feel like they’re “losing their faith” after church harm 🚩 The role of power, fear, and control inside unhealthy church systems 🚩 How to begin healing, disentangling, and rebuilding a resilient faith This isn’t about walking away from faith entirely, it’s about reclaiming what was distorted—and finding something real, whole, and life-giving again. 📚 Resources Mentioned 👉 Spiritual Abuse & Healing Course (Allender Center) - https://theallendercenter.org/offerings/online-courses/spiritual-abuse-and-healing/ 👉 Learn more + resources: https://theallendercenter.org 🎧  If this resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information! Wanna say hi? Send a text! At The Journey and The Process we strive to help you heal. Our therapists are trauma specialists who use evidence-based tools like EMDR, Brainspotting, Somatic Experiencing, and Internal Family Systems to help you heal - mind, soul, and body. Reach out today to start your healing journey. https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/ Join a vibrant community that takes you deeper into topics with a private podcast feed available on your fave podcast platform, helpful tools served right to your inbox, and quarterly Zoom calls to bring it all together! Learn more and join now -  https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/upcoming-events-groups/trauma-healing-support-online/  This book is for every Christian woman who has been harmed sexually, whether that happened in childhood, adulthood, or even within your coercive controlling marriage, and you're longing to feel safe in your body again. We talk about the hard stuff, shame, desire, faith, and even questions like, is this sin or is this trauma?You don't have to untangle it alone. Body & Soul, Healed & Whole is for you. Get a copy here today - https://a.co/d/8Jo3Z4V 👍 If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information! 📖 Order Body & Soul, Healed & Whole: An Invitational Guide to Healthy Sexuality After Trauma, Abuse, and Coercive Control Wanna support Hey Tabi? Buy me a coffee here - https://buymeacoffee.com/heytabi 📩 Connect with Tabitha & The Journey and The Process: 💻 Tabitha's Website - www.tabithawestbrook.com 📲 Tabitha's Instagram - www.instagram.com/tabithathecounselor 🎙️ Podcast Homepage - https://heytabi.buzzsprout.com 💻 The Journey & The Process Website - www.thejourneyandtheprocess.com Subscribe to our YouTube Channel & watch podcast episodes there 🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy and is intended for educational purposes only. If you're in crisis or need therapy, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional. Need to know how to find a great therapist? Read this blog post here.

    1h 5m
  7. Apr 20

    Understanding Coercive Control and How to Break Free

    Most people think abuse means being hit. But what if some of the most damaging abuse leaves no visible bruises at all? In this deep-dive episode, licensed trauma therapist and domestic abuse expert Tabitha Westbrook breaks down what coercive control REALLY is and why terms like "domestic violence" or "narcissistic abuse" don't even come close to describing it. In this episode you'll learn: • Why coercive control is about taking someone's personhood, not just hurting their body • The subtle tactics coercive controllers use • Why ALL coercive control is physical abuse (yes, really) • How to recognize if YOU are in a coercively controlling relationship • What to do if you think YOU might be the coercive controller and that change IS possible Whether it's a marriage, a friendship, or even church, coercive control shows up in more places than we realize. This episode will give you language, clarity, and a path forward. 🕊️ Men of Peace Cohort applications now open → https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/upcoming-events-groups/men-of-peace/ 📞 Called to Peace Ministries → https://calledtopeace.org/ 📚 Eyes Wide Open by Dr. Deborah Wingfield → https://amzn.to/4uei4rV 📲 Rate & review on your favorite podcast platform — it helps others find us! Wanna say hi? Send a text! At The Journey and The Process we strive to help you heal. Our therapists are trauma specialists who use evidence-based tools like EMDR, Brainspotting, Somatic Experiencing, and Internal Family Systems to help you heal - mind, soul, and body. Reach out today to start your healing journey. https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/  This book is for every Christian woman who has been harmed sexually, whether that happened in childhood, adulthood, or even within your coercive controlling marriage, and you're longing to feel safe in your body again. We talk about the hard stuff, shame, desire, faith, and even questions like, is this sin or is this trauma?You don't have to untangle it alone. Body & Soul, Healed & Whole is for you. Get a copy here today - https://a.co/d/8Jo3Z4V 👍 If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information! 📖 Order Body & Soul, Healed & Whole: An Invitational Guide to Healthy Sexuality After Trauma, Abuse, and Coercive Control Wanna support Hey Tabi? Buy me a coffee here - https://buymeacoffee.com/heytabi 📩 Connect with Tabitha & The Journey and The Process: 💻 Tabitha's Website - www.tabithawestbrook.com 📲 Tabitha's Instagram - www.instagram.com/tabithathecounselor 🎙️ Podcast Homepage - https://heytabi.buzzsprout.com 💻 The Journey & The Process Website - www.thejourneyandtheprocess.com Subscribe to our YouTube Channel & watch podcast episodes there 🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy and is intended for educational purposes only. If you're in crisis or need therapy, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional. Need to know how to find a great therapist? Read this blog post here.

    38 min
  8. Apr 13

    Does God Really Hate Divorce? What the Bible and Peer-Reviewed Research Actually Say

    What if everything the church taught you about divorce was based on misquoted research and a mistranslation? In this episode, Tabitha Westbrook sits down with the one and only Gretchen Baskerville — Christian author, speaker, and founder of LifeSavingDivorce.com — to dismantle the myths that keep abuse survivors trapped in destructive marriages. With 25+ years of biblical and evidence-based insight, Gretchen unpacks the peer-reviewed research the church rarely talks about: why divorce is not universally harmful to children, how no-fault divorce laws reduced wife homicide rates by 10% and domestic violence by 30%, and what the Dead Sea Scrolls reveal about the infamous "God hates divorce" verse. Whether you're a pastor, a people helper, or someone in a coercively controlling relationship, this episode will challenge what you've been told and give you the research to back it up. Find Gretchen: Website - https://lifesavingdivorce.com/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/gretchenbaskerville/ Wanna say hi? Send a text! At The Journey and The Process we strive to help you heal. Our therapists are trauma specialists who use evidence-based tools like EMDR, Brainspotting, Somatic Experiencing, and Internal Family Systems to help you heal - mind, soul, and body. Reach out today to start your healing journey. https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/ Join a vibrant community that takes you deeper into topics with a private podcast feed available on your fave podcast platform, helpful tools served right to your inbox, and quarterly Zoom calls to bring it all together! Learn more and join now -  https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/upcoming-events-groups/trauma-healing-support-online/  This book is for every Christian woman who has been harmed sexually, whether that happened in childhood, adulthood, or even within your coercive controlling marriage, and you're longing to feel safe in your body again. We talk about the hard stuff, shame, desire, faith, and even questions like, is this sin or is this trauma?You don't have to untangle it alone. Body & Soul, Healed & Whole is for you. Get a copy here today - https://a.co/d/8Jo3Z4V 👍 If this episode resonated with you, please like, subscribe, and share to help others who need this information! 📖 Order Body & Soul, Healed & Whole: An Invitational Guide to Healthy Sexuality After Trauma, Abuse, and Coercive Control Wanna support Hey Tabi? Buy me a coffee here - https://buymeacoffee.com/heytabi 📩 Connect with Tabitha & The Journey and The Process: 💻 Tabitha's Website - www.tabithawestbrook.com 📲 Tabitha's Instagram - www.instagram.com/tabithathecounselor 🎙️ Podcast Homepage - https://heytabi.buzzsprout.com 💻 The Journey & The Process Website - www.thejourneyandtheprocess.com Subscribe to our YouTube Channel & watch podcast episodes there 🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy and is intended for educational purposes only. If you're in crisis or need therapy, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional. Need to know how to find a great therapist? Read this blog post here.

    59 min
5
out of 5
30 Ratings

About

Welcome to "Hey Tabi!" the podcast where we talk about the hard things out loud, with our actual lips. We'll cover all kinds of topics across the mental health spectrum, including how it intersects with the Christian faith. Nothing is off limits here & we are not "take-two-verses-and-call-me-in-the-morning."I'm Tabitha Westbrook & I'm a licensed trauma therapist (but I'm not your trauma therapist). I'm an expert in domestic abuse & coercive control & how complex trauma impacts our health & well-being. Our focus here is knowledge & healing - trauma doesn't have to eat your lunch forever. There is hope! Now, let's get going!How to connect:https://www.tabithawestbrook.com/Therapy Website: (We are able to see clients in NC & TX)https://thejourneyandtheprocess.com/Instagram:@tabithathecounselor@_tjatpDisclaimer: This podcast is not therapy & is for informational purposes only. If you need therapy I encourage you to find an awesome therapist licensed where you are that can help you out!!

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