Flying Free

Natalie Hoffman
  • 4.9 (1K)
  • CHRISTIANITY
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Flying Free is a support resource for women of faith who need hope and healing from hidden emotional abuse, spiritual abuse, and narcissistic abuse. Because of misogynistic theology taught in controlling and spiritually abusive churches, many Christian women find themselves in destructive marriages where there is an uneven power dynamic. Male partners use their status as a husband to gain power and control over a woman’s mind, emotions, body, social life, finances, and more. When she tries to get help from her equally abusive church environment, she is betrayed and re-abused. Flying Free offers a Christ-centered, gospel-oriented perspective on domestic abuse that protects and honors the voices and autonomy of women. Tune in each week to hear conversations with emotional abuse advocates and fellow survivors who will walk with you on your journey up and out. We hear you. You are not alone. Learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

  1. How Emotional Abuse in Your Christian Marriage Impacts Your Spiritual Health - Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 5 [360]

    6D AGO

    How Emotional Abuse in Your Christian Marriage Impacts Your Spiritual Health - Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 5 [360]

    Emotional abuse in a Christian marriage doesn't just damage your mental health. It corrodes your spiritual foundation until you can't tell the difference between God's voice and your abuser's voice anymore. 🔑 Key Takeaways: Emotional abuse doesn’t just affect your mind and body. It wounds your soul.Natalie draws a powerful connection between emotional abuse and spiritual damage, especially for Christian women who’ve been taught not to trust themselves.When you’re conditioned to distrust your own inner knowing, spiritual confusion sets in. This leads to internal conflict, spiritual isolation, and the inability to differentiate between God's voice and the voice of your abuser.The church’s role often compounds the harm. Religious teachings that equate self-trust with rebellion against God cause many women to stay in abusive situations out of fear of divine punishment.You were never meant to worship at the altar of someone else’s control. God doesn’t ask you to sacrifice your voice, sanity, or safety. He offers freedom, not bondage.📚 Natalie Reads from Her Memoir: All the Scary Little Gods Timestamp 2:00–20:30Natalie reads Chapter 58: “Bible Counseling”, which recounts two devastating encounters with so-called “biblical counselors.” These counselors weaponized scripture to enforce submission and silence rather than support. Through deeply personal storytelling, she illustrates how spiritual guidance can become a vehicle for psychological and spiritual gaslighting. 🎁 I want to give you a free gift. It’s the audio version of my book, All the Scary Little Gods. It’s a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. You can listen to it FREE by going to scarylittlegods.com 🎙️ Check out the rest of the Emotional Abuse 101 series: http://bit.ly/49VU1qr 🔗 Other Links and Resources Mentioned 🧭 Free Resources & Support — Visit flyingfreenow.com📕 Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage — Order on Amazon  https://amzn.to/4o5FCM8💌 Join the Flying Free Kaleidoscope — Visit joinflyingfree.com

    34 min
  2. Why You Keep Second-Guessing Yourself in Your Christian Marriage (And How to Stop) Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 4 [359]

    12/23/2025

    Why You Keep Second-Guessing Yourself in Your Christian Marriage (And How to Stop) Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 4 [359]

    What happens when you're the only one trying in your marriage? When your partner seems indifferent, and you're the one praying, planning, reading, learning, bending, sacrificing only to be met with silence or worse, resistance? In this episode, Natalie peels back the layers of emotional and spiritual exhaustion that come from being the only emotionally invested person in a relationship. With grace, clarity, and a no-nonsense look at reality, she answers a powerful listener question: “If I’m the only one caring, what’s the point of staying?” 🔑 Key Takeaways: One-sided effort isn’t love. If only one person is carrying the weight of emotional and relational labor, it’s not a partnership, it's a survival pattern.Control often disguises itself as passivity. Abusers don’t need to yell or hit to maintain power; many use silence, neglect, and apathy to keep you chasing connection.Spiritual bypassing keeps women trapped. Many Christian women are taught that leaving a cold or neglectful husband is rebellion against God. But that’s not what the Bible says, and it’s not what Jesus models.You can stop asking for crumbs. It’s okay to stop showing up for someone who consistently chooses not to show up for you.God isn’t asking you to abandon yourself. He's not honored by marriages that demand your silence, your sanity, or your soul. He's inviting you to freedom, not bondage.🎙️ Check out the rest of the Emotional Abuse 101 series: http://bit.ly/49VU1qr Get a free chapter of Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman’s Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse by going to isitmebook.com Episode quotes: “If you’re the only one working on the relationship, you’re not in a relationship. You’re in a slow death sentence, and it’s okay to want to live.” “Control isn’t always loud. Sometimes it’s a stone wall you beat your heart against, hoping it’ll soften.” “You don’t need your partner to validate your pain for it to be real. It already is.” “God doesn’t ask you to sacrifice your soul to prove your commitment.”

    37 min
  3. Emotional Abuse vs. Healthy Conflict in a Christian Marriage: How to Tell the Difference - Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 3 [358]

    12/16/2025

    Emotional Abuse vs. Healthy Conflict in a Christian Marriage: How to Tell the Difference - Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 3 [358]

    In this episode, I walk you through five crucial differences between a healthy Christian marriage and an emotionally abusive one. 🔑 Key Takeaways: Healthy marriages = clarity, respect, and growthAbusive marriages = confusion, control, and punishmentIf you're constantly walking on eggshells, it's not normal. God never asked you to sacrifice your soul on the altar of someone else's entitlement.Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources: Check out the first two parts of this eight-part series: “The 10 Most Subtle Signs of Emotional Abuse in a Christian Marriage” and “The Art of Saying No: Setting Boundaries When You've Been Trained to Say Yes.”

    43 min

  4. 12/14/2025 · BONUS

    BONUS: An episode from my PRIVATE podcast about what it takes to change your life

    In this end-of-the-year BONUS episode, I want to share one of my recent PRIVATE podcast episodes exclusively for members of the Flying Free Kaleidoscope only.  I also made an 8-minute video tour of the Flying Free Kaleidoscope on my phone. It will show you what the INSIDE of the Kaleidoscope looks like here at the end of 2025 and going into 2026. You can watch that on YouTube HERE. The price is going up on January 1, 2026, and I'd love to see you get in on the lower price if you can. Prices never go up for current members, so lock yourself in on the price we've had for five years while you've got the chance because it will never be this low again. (Currently $29/month or $290 for an entire year - but going up to $39/mo or $390/year starting January 1.) Learn more and complete your application HERE.

    28 min
  5. The Art of Saying No: Setting Boundaries When You've Been Trained to Say Yes - Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 2 [357]

    12/09/2025

    The Art of Saying No: Setting Boundaries When You've Been Trained to Say Yes - Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 2 [357]

    Have you ever been told that saying "no" makes you selfish? That good Christian women never rock the boat, always serve with a smile, and definitely do not have thoughts of their own? This episode is Part 2 of our Emotional Abuse 101 series, and today we’re diving into the art of saying no. If the idea of saying no makes your stomach flip or sends you into a guilt spiral, this episode is your lifeline. I’ll walk you through WHY it’s so hard to say no and HOW to start saying it anyway with confidence and without apology. Key Takeaways: Saying no without guilt is an adult skill, not a rebellious sin. People-pleasing is often a trauma response. Your nervous system isn’t broken. It’s just been doing its job a little too well.You don’t need permission to have boundaries. You’re not waiting for anyone’s approval. Boundaries ≠ controlling others. Boundaries = choosing how YOU respond when others misbehave.There’s neuroscience behind this. Your brain can be rewired to feel safe even when saying no. Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here Get a FREE chapter of Is It ME? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, along with the companion workbook for that chapter, by going to flyingfreenow.com. I'll also send you the Freedom Letters. (Also free. 😉 ) Related Resources: Check out Part One of this eight part series: “The 10 Subtle Signs of Emotional Abuse in a Christian Marriage.”

    37 min
  6. The 10 Most Subtle Signs of Emotional Abuse in a Christian Marriage - Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 1 [356]

    12/02/2025

    The 10 Most Subtle Signs of Emotional Abuse in a Christian Marriage - Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 1 [356]

    Welcome to part one of a brand-new series I’m calling “Emotional Abuse 101: Everything You Need to Know,” because, let’s face it, the church didn’t exactly hand out “How to Spot a Narcissist in Your Youth Group” pamphlets in Sunday school. In this episode, I’m diving into the 10 most subtle signs of emotional abuse, the kind of signs that don’t leave bruises on your body but do leave bruises on your soul. These are the red flags that fly under the radar, the ones that make you ask “Am I too sensitive?” or “Maybe I am the problem?” Here are some things we’ll cover in this episode: The Silent Treatment Special — Why emotional withholding isn't just immature behavior, and the real reason he's using it against youMr. Jekyll and Pastor Hyde — What happens when everyone else thinks he's amazing, but you're living with someone completely different at homeStrategic Emotional Sabotage — The shocking pattern behind why your birthdays, holidays, and girls' nights keep getting ruined Weaponized Vulnerability — How opening your heart becomes ammunition in his hands, and why you're not crazy for feeling betrayedDream Crusher Lite™ — The subtle way he makes pursuing your goals absolutely miserable without ever saying "no" outrightPlausible Deniability — Why you're always "too sensitive" or "making assumptions," and how this phrase is actually a manipulation tacticRead the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here Take a FREE emotional abuse quiz by going to emotionalabusequiz.com. Find out if what you're experiencing is normal Christian marriage stuff...or abuse.  Related Resources: Was this episode helpful? You may find these two Flying Free episodes equally worthwhile: “Does an Abuser Know They Are Abusive?” and “Nine Tricks Emotional Abuser Use to Pull Us Back Into the Cycle (and six clever ways to respond!)”

    29 min
  7. Do You Need Someone to Rescue You? [355]

    11/25/2025

    Do You Need Someone to Rescue You? [355]

    In this episode, I get down and dirty with a topic that triggers all the rule-followers and religious gatekeepers: salvation. Not the flannelgraph-Jesus kind where you prayed the “magic words” at age seven and then spent the next 30 years terrified you did it wrong. Nope. I’m talking about real, liberating, soul-exploding salvation. This one’s especially for you if you’ve ever stayed in an abusive marriage because you thought God would be mad if you left. If you’re exhausted from trying to please “godly” authority figures who think they are mini Popes. If you’ve prayed the salvation prayer 73 times just to be sure it “took.” Key Takeaways: Belief isn’t a checklist. It’s not about doing the right things, following the right leaders, or avoiding the wrong music. It’s about trusting that Christ already did it all.The gift of salvation is already yours. Yes, even if you cuss, leave your abuser, or buy non-organic lettuce.Many Christians are still hoping for a salvation that is already theirs. Why? Because we’ve been taught to fear God more than we trust Him. The verse “God hates divorce” has been weaponized. (Psst…it doesn’t say what you think it does, anyway. Listen to find out what the Bible actually says in Malachi.)You can experience the joy of salvation the moment you believe it’s real. Like full-body joy. (Really!)Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here Listen to my book, All the Scary Little Gods, FREE by going to scarylittlegods.com. Related Resources: If this episode was helpful for you, you’ll love these two episodes, too: “Two Hotel Rooms: One Rescue Mission” and “Praying for a Miracle — When the Miracle Might Be You Walking Away.”

    20 min
  8. Breaking the Cycle of Fear, Obligation, and Guilt: Gwendoline’s Story [354]

    11/18/2025

    Breaking the Cycle of Fear, Obligation, and Guilt: Gwendoline’s Story [354]

    Ever wonder why you keep getting stuck in the same soul-sucking relational merry-go-round and can’t get off? Why you feel like you're starring in a never-ending soap opera you didn’t audition for, but somehow you’re the villain for wanting out? I sat down with Gwendoline, a longtime member of Flying Free and Flying Higher, to talk about her epic butterfly transformation. We're talking cycles of chaos, religious gaslighting, and the sneaky little acronym that kept her trapped in marital misery: FOG (fear, obligation, guilt). Key Takeaways: If it feels off, it probably is – Chaos, fights, and emotional whiplash aren’t just "normal marriage stuff." They're red flags.Your body knows before your brain does – Tight hips, tension, and dread? Not random. That’s trauma.Love isn’t a magical fix-all – You can love someone and still need to leave them. Track the truth – Emoji mood calendars and journaling helped Gwendoline see the pattern she was gaslit into ignoring.You are the rescuer – No knight in shining armor is coming. Just you, your big-girl panties, and God on a divine co-rescue mission.Leaving is hard, but worth it – Healing takes time, but the moment you step out, your real life begins.Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here Get a FREE chapter of Is It ME? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, along with the companion workbook for that chapter, by going to flyingfreenow.com. I'll also send you the Freedom Letters. (Also free. 😉 ) Related Resources: Want to listen to more survivor stories? Check out “Military Marriage Abuse: Elizabeth’s Story” and “Out of the Poisoned Pond: Jennie’s Story.”

    45 min
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About

Flying Free is a support resource for women of faith who need hope and healing from hidden emotional abuse, spiritual abuse, and narcissistic abuse. Because of misogynistic theology taught in controlling and spiritually abusive churches, many Christian women find themselves in destructive marriages where there is an uneven power dynamic. Male partners use their status as a husband to gain power and control over a woman’s mind, emotions, body, social life, finances, and more. When she tries to get help from her equally abusive church environment, she is betrayed and re-abused. Flying Free offers a Christ-centered, gospel-oriented perspective on domestic abuse that protects and honors the voices and autonomy of women. Tune in each week to hear conversations with emotional abuse advocates and fellow survivors who will walk with you on your journey up and out. We hear you. You are not alone. Learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

Information

  • Creator
    Natalie Hoffman
  • Years Active
    2018 - 2025
  • Episodes
    379
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2022 Flying Free
  • Show Website
    Flying Free

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