Clearer, not Louder with Beatrice Kamau

Beatrice Kamau
  • 4.8 (3.3K)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

Clearer, Not Louder (formerly The Self Love Fix) is a podcast by Beatrice Kamau for the whimsically unserious (but serious about life!) girls, exploring discernment, the power of the voice, and what becomes possible when you learn to trust and use your own—without losing your joyfulness along the way. In a world that encourages constant reacting, overexplaining, performing, and taking everything very seriously, this is a space for getting clearer about what's actually happening to you and around you, saying what you mean, and remaining wonderfully alive while you do it. Each episode explores the subtle dynamics shaping our relationships, decisions, and inner lives: the moments when something feels off, when we override our God-given wisdom, when "I'll wait and see" quietly becomes self-negotiation, or when we realize it might be time to stop explaining and simply act accordingly. Through thoughtful reflections, insightful conversations, and a sprinkle of humor throughout, Clearer, Not Louder explores what it looks like to become more discerning without becoming cynical, more principled without becoming rigid, and firmer and more powerful in your voice without losing the playful, curious, and optimistic parts of yourself. Because growing wiser doesn't have to mean becoming harder—or less fun. The goal isn't to be louder. It's to be clearer.

  1. 4d ago

    Ep 28. Making Friends in Adulthood as an Ambitious Woman + My Experience at the Create and Cultivate Festival

    In this episode, we explore what it looks like to make friends in adulthood as an ambitious woman—from getting past the beliefs that make putting yourself out there feel harder than it needs to, to finding people who are actually OPEN to connection. We also chat why ambitious women need ambitious friends, beginning again after friendship loss, and a few things I learned from my experience at the Create & Cultivate Festival. What you'll learn in this episode: The two beliefs that quietly make adult friendship HARDER than it needs to be: that putting yourself out there is a humiliation ritual (it's not!), and that everyone is on a no new friends vibe (they're not) Tangible ways to meet and genuinely connect with people—even if you're introverted (i've got 7 for ya!) How to dust yourself off and try again when a potential friendship fizzles and you feel discouraged about trying again. IG: @clearernotlouder

  2. Sep 17

    Ep.27 Being Clear Doesn't Mean Telling People What to do

    In this episode we explore how to remain your warm, kind, and whimsical self while being clear and direct (you can be both!). We also discuss why being clear doesn't mean telling people what they can and cannot do and how to be clear and direct sans the fear of being rude, blunt, or "mean." What you'll learn in this episode: The difference between being clear and being controlling—and why they two are NOT actually related How to free yourself from the responsibility of how someone processes your directness How to communicate what you want, what you're available for, and what you will do next while leaving other people responsible for their own choices. IG: @clearernotlouder

  3. Sep 3

    Ep 26. Can You Tell Yourself No?

    ***PSST, NO EPISODE NEXT WEEK SEPTEMBER 10, WE WILL BE BACK SEPTEMBER 17 IN LIGHT OF LABOR DAY*** In this episode, we chat: Why being comfortable and confident setting boundaries with other people might start with getting better at telling yourself no—and what your day-to-day choices can teach you about saying no when letting things slide, minimizing the severity of an issue, or simply going along with it feels like... the easier option. What you'll learn in this episode: Why setting boundaries is about more than knowing what to say—and how the way you manage your impulses and emotions in everyday life can show up, positively or negatively, in the boundaries you set with others. What it looks like to tell yourself no when yes is still an option, and why being able to do something doesn't always mean it's in your best interest to do it. How to actually begin building the muscle to hold boundaries with others without the guilt, mind-spiraling, and preoccupation with how they will receive what you say. Book recommendation mentioned: Nonviolent Communication by Marshall B. Rosenberg, PhD IG: @clearernotlouder

  4. Aug 27

    Ep 25. What If You're More Interesting Than You Think?

    In this episode, we chat: Why you should consider yourself—and the things you're drawn to—interesting and worth paying attention to, not just other people, and how uncovering the unique perspectives God has placed within you connects to the purpose over your life. What you'll learn in this episode: What the people you consider "interesting," "unique," and "cool" are doing differently that causes them to stand out—and why it's not what you think. How dropping performance and developing your own unique point of view around your interests can make you far more interesting than trying to be interesting. How the things you're naturally drawn to and curious about tell a story about the gifts and skills the Lord has equipped you with for the purpose & assignment over your life. IG: @clearernotlouder

  5. Aug 20

    Ep 24 Do They See You for Who You Are or Are They Just in Proximity to You?

    In this episode, we chat: The FINE line between what it's like to have a connection-- a friendship, a relationship etc-- with someone who is delighted to learn the ins and outs of you and someone who... wants to relate to you on their terms What you'll learn in this episode: What it looks like when you make a decision to no longer FIGHT and adjust yourself in order to be seen. The difference between being mindful about how you communicate to someone and changing who you are to sustain the connection-- adapting vs. self-sacrificing. Why someone NOT taking the time to know the ins-and-outs and quirky little facts about you does not mean you're not worth getting to know deeply-- they might just not be... for you ESPECIALLY if you're a whimsical and curious girly. IG: @clearernotlouder

  6. Aug 13

    Ep 23. Can You Stay Clear When People Challenge Your Thinking?

    In this episode, we chat: How to stay CLEAR AND FIRM on what you know, want, and believe when someone else's pressure or reactions challenge your boundaries, values and opinions. What you'll learn in this episode: Why a friendly "come onnn" after you've already said no is worth paying attention to—and how easily a decision can become a negotiation you never agreed to have. Why someone telling you all about who they're going to be can distract you from paying attention to who they're showing you they are right now. How dramatic reactions and "well, what about you?" arguments can leave you questioning a choice you were perfectly clear about five minutes ago—and what that can tell you about your discernment. IG: @clearernotlouder

  7. Aug 6

    Ep 22. Do They Love You or... Do They Love What Happens to Them Because of You?

    In this episode, we chat: The fine line between someone loving you and someone loving who they ARE and who they BECOME around you. What you'll learn in this episode: Why someone can genuinely enjoy being around you—and still be more attached to how they feel with you than to who you actually are. How to recognize the difference between someone who values you for your utility and someone who remains invested in you as a person. The subtle difference between someone who carries your company and someone who carries your story—and why one leaves you feeling familiar, while the other leaves you feeling deeply known. IG: @clearernotlouder

  8. Jul 30

    Ep 21 On Giving Everyone the Benefit of the Doubt but... You

    In this episode, we chat: Why it's high time you stop giving everyone but *yourself* the benefit of the doubt when something is off with that friendship, that job, that relationship etc. What you'll learn in this episode: • Why the benefit of the doubt becomes expensive when you're the only one paying for it. •  Why grace needs... discernment and why you don't have to overextend yourself under the guise of "giving the benefit of the doubt" • Why assuming everyone would handle a situation the way you would might be keeping you from seeing the truth (because yes, even though you think they would NEVER... they might just) IG: @clearernotlouder

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Hosts & Guests

4.8
out of 5
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About

Clearer, Not Louder (formerly The Self Love Fix) is a podcast by Beatrice Kamau for the whimsically unserious (but serious about life!) girls, exploring discernment, the power of the voice, and what becomes possible when you learn to trust and use your own—without losing your joyfulness along the way. In a world that encourages constant reacting, overexplaining, performing, and taking everything very seriously, this is a space for getting clearer about what's actually happening to you and around you, saying what you mean, and remaining wonderfully alive while you do it. Each episode explores the subtle dynamics shaping our relationships, decisions, and inner lives: the moments when something feels off, when we override our God-given wisdom, when "I'll wait and see" quietly becomes self-negotiation, or when we realize it might be time to stop explaining and simply act accordingly. Through thoughtful reflections, insightful conversations, and a sprinkle of humor throughout, Clearer, Not Louder explores what it looks like to become more discerning without becoming cynical, more principled without becoming rigid, and firmer and more powerful in your voice without losing the playful, curious, and optimistic parts of yourself. Because growing wiser doesn't have to mean becoming harder—or less fun. The goal isn't to be louder. It's to be clearer.

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