Do you feel like you have to prove your worth through the shear amount of work you do or prove your value by making sure you're seen as busy, always hustling, and super productive? Do you feel burned out, overwhelmed with work, or simply feeling that you're just doing too much? If so, this is the "doing enough" episode, and we hope you come away acknowledging that you're wired to do enough (often more than enough) and that the pressure to do more is something we layer on top of that natural wiring, and it is likely more harmful than good. We'll dig into perfectionism and how it can push us into doing too much and its association with anxiety and depression. We'll also explore more of the burnout research and how perfectionism and the myth of productivity are related to burnout. Importantly, we'll talk about some practical strategies to help you identify what might be driving you to do too much and how you can soften your expectations. Additionally, feeling burned out and overwhelmed with work can have less to do with the amount of work you're doing and more to do with the lack of support from your employer and other key factors related to burnout. This is that canary in the coal mine phenomenon. If you can relate to that, we also have some strategies to consider. About: The Joy Lab Podcast is an Ambie-nominated podcast that blends science and soul to help you cope better with stress, anxiety, and depression. It's hosted by integrative psychiatrist Dr. Henry Emmons and holistic mental health researcher Dr. Aimee Prasek. The podcast is best paired with the Joy Lab App. Bonus: spread some joy and keep this podcast ad-free by donating (Joy Lab is powered by the nonprofit Pathways North and your donations are tax-deductible) Full transcript here Sources and Notes for Our Element of Enoughness: Related Joy Lab Episodes: Ep. 223: Breaking Free From Pathological Productivity Ep. 206: Time Poverty & Busyness: Too Busy to Be Well Ep. 201: Balance Perfectionism & Do-Too-Muchism Bellam, S., Curran, T., Hill, A. P., & Stoeber, J. (2025). Perfectionism and work performance: A meta-analysis. https://doi.org/10.1111/joop.12570 Carver, C. S., Lawrence, J. W., & Scheier, M. F. (1999). Self-discrepancies and affect: Incorporating the role of feared selves. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167299025007002 Crocker, J., & Park, L. E. (2004). The costly pursuit of self-esteem. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.131.3.392 Crocker, J., & Park, L. E. (2004). Reaping the benefits of pursuing self-esteem without the costs? Reply to Schmuck and Sheldon (2004), Sheldon et al. (2004), Pyszczynski et al. (2004), and Kernis (2004). https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.130.3.430 Crocker, J., Karpinski, A., Quinn, D. M., & Chase, S. K. (2003). When grades determine self-worth: Consequences of contingent self-worth for male and female engineering and psychology majors. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.85.3.507 Crocker, J., & Wolfe, C. T. (2001). Contingencies of self-worth. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-295X.108.3.593 Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2004). Avoiding death or engaging life as accounts of meaning and culture: Comment on Pyszczynski et al. (2004). https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.130.3.473 Freudenberger, H. J. (1974). Staff burn-out. Journal of Social Issues, 30(1), 159–165. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1540-4560.1974.tb00706.x Harari, D., Swider, B. W., Bujold Steed, L., & Breidenthal, A. P. (2018). Is perfect good? A meta-analysis of perfectionism in the workplace. https://doi.org/10.1037/apl0000324 Hewitt, P. L., & Flett, G. L. (1991). Perfectionism in the self and social contexts: Conceptualization, assessment, and association with psychopathology. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.60.3.456 Higgins, E. T. (1987). Self-discrepancy: A theory relating self and affect. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-295X.94.3.319 Joseph, S., & Linley, P. A. (2005). Positive adjustment to threatening events: An organismic valuing theory of growth through adversity. https://doi.org/10.1037/1089-2680.9.3.262 Kernis, M. H. (2005). Measuring self-esteem in context: The importance of stability of self-esteem in psychological functioning. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-6494.2005.00359.x Kirkpatrick, L. A., & Ellis, B. J. (2001). An evolutionary-psychological approach to self-esteem: Multiple domains and multiple functions. In G. J. O. Fletcher & M. S. Clark (Eds.), Blackwell handbook of social psychology: Interpersonal processes (pp. 411–436). Blackwell. Leary, M. R. (2000). Sociometer theory and the pursuit of relational value: Getting to the root of self-esteem. https://doi.org/10.1080/14792772043000045 Maslach, C. (1981). The measurement of experienced burnout. https://doi.org/10.1002/job.4030020205 Park, L. E., & Crocker, J. (2005). Attachment styles and contingencies of self-worth. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167205277030 Pyszczynski, T., Greenberg, J., Solomon, S., Arndt, J., & Schimel, J. (2004). Why do people need self-esteem? https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.130.3.435 Schaufeli, W. B., Leiter, M. P., & Maslach, C. (2009). Burnout: 35 years of research and practice. https://doi.org/10.1108/13620430910966406 Sonnetag, S., & Fritz, C. (2014). Recovery from job stress: The stressor-detachment model as an integrative framework. https://doi.org/10.1002/job.1924 Tricia Hersey's website Lynn Twist's Book: The Soul of Money Questions this episode was made for: Q: Why do I feel guilty or anxious when I'm not being productive, even when I know I need a break? A: We are naturally wired to engage and do, and then we layer on extra expectations, perfectionism, and the belief that our worth is tied to visible busyness. It's essential to first bring awareness to what's driving us to do more than enough. This episode offers strategies for that mindful awareness and ways to come back into more balance. Q: Is burnout really just about working too many hours, or is there something deeper going on? A: Dr. Christina Maslach's six-factor burnout model shows that most of what drives burnout has nothing to do with logged hours. Lack of control, insufficient rewards, breakdown of community, absence of fairness, and value conflicts are additional factors. This episode explains how we have to look at the big picture (rather than just blaming ourselves) to create real change. Key moments: [00:00] Welcome — Enoughness Ep 3: doing enough [00:30] The two-week vacation thought experiment: what comes up in your body when you imagine truly stepping away? [01:00] Itching to check email just in case, guilt about doing nothing, loss without a to-do list — all very normal, and worth examining [01:30] We are already wired to do enough — the pressure to do more is something we layer on top of that natural drive [02:00] We attach our doing to our worth, and to what others can see: always busy, always achieving, always on [03:00] Henry: email changed everything — from 9-to-5 availability to always-on; the inbox that empties for 10 minutes and then refills [04:30] Text messaging took it further — the expected response speed keeps accelerating. The result: a state of constant alertness, constantly scanning for something important, hard to resist the impulse to check [05:30] We've trained ourselves to react immediately to the relentless drumbeat of more — mindfulness emphasizes being over doing, but there's so much pulling against it [06:30] 150 years ago, news took weeks to cross the country by horse, ship, or foot — always-on is entirely new territory for our nervous systems. We apologize for a three-day email delay — when it would have taken six weeks round-trip to even get the apology back [07:30] Recap of Hewitt and Flett's three perfectionism types; self-oriented perfectionism connects most directly to "doing enough" [08:00] Even self-oriented perfectionism doesn't operate in a vacuum — we write stories about how others are judging our response times [09:30] Henry: perfectionism usually starts in childhood — good report card means a parent is proud; fitting in becomes the price of admission to belonging; We internalize: "I am worthy if I accomplish enough; if I perform well enough; if I don't fail" [10:30] Perfectionism is a losing game because the standard always moves — there's always another rung on the ladder [11:00] Did high achievers get there because of perfectionism? The evidence says they likely got there in spite of it [11:30] 2018 meta-analysis: "Is Perfect Good?" — teases apart excellence-seeking vs. failure-avoiding perfectionism [12:00] Excellence-seeking: weak, inconsistent relationship with performance — small effect with many disclaimers [12:30] Failure-avoiding: did not predict improvements in performance; 2025 Bellam et al. meta-analysis: overall relationship inconclusive [13:00] What perfectionism does predict: moderate-to-large associations with anxiety, depression, and burnout [13:30] You can strive for greatness, have high expectations, work really hard — and that is very different from believing your worth is at stake if you don't hit perfect [14:00] Henry: perfectionism predicts suffering, not performance — reviewing your work at midnight for the third time out of terror is not diligence; it's hurting yourself [14:30] Aimee: doing enough is enough — this is not about shirking responsibility; personal drive and responsibility can exist without perfectionism [15:30] Dr. Christina Maslach's six factors of burnout: work overload, lack of control, insufficient rewards, breakdown of community, absence of fairness, value conflicts [16:00] Most of burnout has nothing to do with logged hours — the other five factors point to things much deeper [16:30] The canary-in-a-coal-mine analogy: if the bird stops singing, it's not because the bird isn't resilient enough; it's a sign something is wrong with the mine [
