On Attachment

Stephanie Rigg
  • 4.9 (1K)
  • RELATIONSHIPS
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Join relationship coach Stephanie Rigg in On Attachment, where she delves deep into all things attachment theory, love, relationships & intimacy - sharing her wisdom and experience to help you start making real changes in your life & relationships. 

  1. DEC 16

    #219: How a Fear of Rejection Keeps Us From What We Want Most

    In this episode, we explore why rejection feels so big — not just in dating and relationships, but across friendships, family, work, and creative life. We look at the evolutionary and attachment roots of rejection sensitivity, and how it creates a confirmation bias that makes neutral situations feel personal. I talk about how the fear of rejection leads us to shrink, stay silent, or hold back from opportunities, creating a self-fulfilling cycle of loneliness and limitation. We also talk about what rejection resilience looks like in practice: separating facts from stories, reality-checking assumptions, taking small risks, and building an internal sense of worth that can withstand a “no.” This is a gentle, grounded invitation to stop rejecting yourself first — and to live more fully, even when rejection is a possibility. ⁠Register for the 28-Day Secure Self Challenge here Download the Anxious Attachment Pep Talks here

    19 min

  2. DEC 9

    #218: Why You're Attracted to Unavailable People

    In this episode, we explore the deeper patterns that make emotionally unavailable partners feel so familiar — even when you want something different. Rather than framing this as a personal flaw or something you’re “doing wrong,” this conversation explores the deeper emotional and relational patterns that make certain dynamics feel familiar, magnetic, or even safe on a nervous-system level. I walk through five core reasons this dynamic tends to repeat: Low self-worth: When love feels like something you need to earn, you may be drawn to people who require effort.Inconsistent early relationships: If connection was unpredictable growing up, inconsistency can feel like “home.”Hope, potential, and the saviour role: Why focusing on who someone could be keeps you invested long after the relationship stops feeling good.Intermittent reinforcement: How sporadic affection creates an addictive cycle that’s hard to break.Your own emotional unavailability: The surprising ways pursuing unavailable people can protect you from deeper vulnerability.This episode offers a compassionate look at why these patterns form — and what it takes to move toward relationships that feel mutual, steady, and emotionally safe. Register for the 28-Day Secure Self Challenge here

    27 min

  3. DEC 3

    #217: The Missing Piece in Your Healing Journey

    In this episode, we explore what it really takes to create meaningful change — especially in those seasons where everything feels hard, familiar patterns keep looping, and no amount of “trying” seems to make a difference. We talk about the inner environment required for real change, and why self-compassion isn’t the opposite of accountability — it’s the foundation of it. You’ll hear about: Why we default to shame when we feel stuckThe myth that self-criticism leads to better behaviourHow shame overwhelms an already stressed nervous systemWhy being on your own team is essential for honest self-reflection👉🏼 Join the January round of my 28-Day Secure Self Challenge here 00:00 Introduction 04:13 Why Self-Judgment is So Common06:32 Understanding and Validating Anxiety08:49 The Role of Self-Compassion in Growth11:58 Isn't Self-Compassion Self-Indulgent?

    18 min

  4. NOV 25

    #216: My Story of Healing Anxious Attachment

    Today's episode is a special one: I'm sharing my own healing story and how I went from anxious and insecure to confident, grounded in my worth, and in a loving partnership. My hope in sharing is that you can see we aren't all that different, and that you feel encouraged to continue on the courageous path of healing. 🖤 If you'd like to explore my Black Friday sale — the biggest I've ever run — click here.

    37 min
  5. #215: Resentment, Real Repair, Conflict Avoidance & Navigating Dating With Kids — ft. James ‘Fish’ Gill

    NOV 20

    #215: Resentment, Real Repair, Conflict Avoidance & Navigating Dating With Kids — ft. James ‘Fish’ Gill

    In today’s episode, I’m joined by my friend James “Fish” Gill for a listener Q&A all about conflict, communication, and staying connected through hard moments. We explore some big questions, including: How to release resentment when a conflict is “resolved” but the emotional residue is still sitting in your bodyWhat real repair actually looks like, and why some apologies land while others don’tWhen a relationship swings from explosive conflict to total conflict avoidance — and how to find a healthier middle groundHow to navigate dating when kids are involved, especially when parenting differences trigger deeper fears, jealousy, or old woundsFish and I unpack the relational dynamics underneath these questions and offer compassionate, practical guidance for moving through it with more clarity, honesty, and connection. If you’re wanting to deepen your communication, repair more effectively, and understand yourself and your partner in moments of tension, this conversation will be a supportive place to land. 👉🏼 My Black Friday Sale is now live — save 65% on my best-selling courses with exclusive Black Friday bundles. Connect with Fish Follow Fish on InstagramVisit Fish's websiteBuy Fish's book, How to Fall in Love with Humanity

    1h 11m

  6. NOV 11

    #214: Parenting Q&A: Fears About Having Kids, Staying Connected After a Baby, Anxious-Avoidant Dynamics & More

    In this special episode of On Attachment, I sit down with my partner Joel to answer your questions about our journey into parenthood with our now 18 month old son. We explore the transition to parenting, how our attachment styles have shaped the experience, and what helps us stay aligned as a couple. The conversation also covers our initial feelings about wanting kids, the surprises and challenges along the way, and the practices that keep us connected and supportive of each other. Join the Black Friday Sale waitlist here Free Resources Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Anxious Attachment Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love

    23 min

  7. NOV 4

    #213: How to Care Less About Others' Opinions & Trust Yourself More

    So many of us spend our lives orienting around what other people think of us — seeking approval, avoiding disapproval, and constantly scanning for reassurance that we’re doing, saying, and being the “right” thing. If you lean towards anxious attachment patterns, this makes perfect sense. The foundation of the anxious attachment pattern is an external orientation — learning to attune to others for safety, validation, and a sense of self. When we’ve never had a steady internal anchor, other people become our compass. But that comes at a cost. We lose touch with our own truth — our values, our preferences, our intuition — and live our lives by borrowed standards. And the more we outsource our worth, the more fragile it becomes. In this episode, we explore how to shift from being other-referenced to self-referenced: Why anxiously attached people are especially sensitive to others’ opinionsHow external orientation keeps us anxious and disconnected from ourselvesWhat it actually means to develop an internal compassPractical steps to build self-trust and integrityHow to tolerate disapproval without collapsing into shame Ultimately, caring less about what others think isn’t about indifference — it’s about self-trust. When you truly respect and stand by yourself, other people’s opinions carry less weight. You stop needing to convince anyone of your worth, because you already know it.

    17 min
  8. #212: How & When to Start Dating Again After a Break-up

    OCT 28

    #212: How & When to Start Dating Again After a Break-up

    One of the most common questions after a break-up is: when will I be ready to start dating again? Sadly, there’s no hard and fast rule, no magic timeline, and no moment where you’ll suddenly feel 100% confident and never wobble again. Readiness isn’t about the calendar — it’s about how you’re feeling, the work you’ve done, and the mindset you're bringing with you.  In this episode, I’ll share: Signs you may not be ready yet (like still being in the thick of grief, rumination, or longing for your ex)Signs you might be moving toward readiness (like curiosity about meeting someone new and clarity around your standards and patterns)How to approach dating again with intention and self-compassionWhy dating itself can stir up new layers of grief — and how that doesn’t mean you’ve failed or gone backwardsIf you’ve been wondering whether to dip your toes back in the dating pool, this episode will help you manage your expectations, recognise where you’re at, and approach the process in a way that feels grounded and intentional. Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    20 min
See All (219)

Hosts & Guests

4.9
out of 5
1,022 Ratings

About

Join relationship coach Stephanie Rigg in On Attachment, where she delves deep into all things attachment theory, love, relationships & intimacy - sharing her wisdom and experience to help you start making real changes in your life & relationships. 

Information

  • Creator
    Stephanie Rigg
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2025
  • Episodes
    219
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Stephanie Rigg
  • Show Website
    On Attachment

You Might Also Like