In Bed With Alexa: Have Better Sex

Alexa Andre - Sexologist and Relationship Expert

The no-b******t sex and relationship podcast where sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) says everything you're too afraid to. Stop having mediocre sex and level up your game! 🎧 New episodes every week.

  1. 4D AGO

    How to Fight So Your Relationship Gets Stronger (ft. Coral Osborne)

    Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with sexologist, intimacy coach for men, and former sex worker Coral Osborne for a conversation about conflict, repair, emotional safety, and how to fight in ways that actually strengthen relationships instead of destroying them. This episode breaks down why conflict is inevitable, why resolution is not the same as repair, and how most people unintentionally make things worse by avoiding discomfort, suppressing feelings, issuing ultimatums, or apologizing without real empathy. Coral shares tools drawn from attachment theory, coaching, lived experience, and relationship psychology to help couples navigate fights with curiosity, accountability, and emotional intelligence. Topics covered include: The difference between conflict resolution and emotional repairWhy 69% of conflict in relationships is recurringSecure vs anxious vs avoidant attachment stylesWhy conflict is necessary for real intimacySulking, silent treatment, and “read my mind” behaviorFight, flight, freeze responses in relationshipsHow avoidance fuels resentment and ruptureThe importance of reassurance during conflictWhy “do you want to be right or happy?” mattersActive listening and emotional attunementHow to bring issues up without score-keepingWhy feelings don’t have to “make sense” to be validRejection and abandonment as core emotional woundsWhat a real apology actually includesWhy ultimatums damage trust and safetyRepair rituals and post-conflict reconnectionWhy makeup sex doesn’t work for everyoneGamifying conflict and repair to reduce defensivenessWhen recurring fights are about values vs preferencesEmotional safety as the foundation for erotic surrenderCuriosity as the key to intimacy, sex, and connection Thank you to the best waterproof sex blanket in the market,  Splash Blanket for keeping me and my guests dry and cozy ◡̈

    58 min
  2. JAN 29

    From Short King to Sex Legend: The Truth About Attraction (ft. Small Hands)

    Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with Aaron Thompson (aka Small Hands) to unpack how an awkward, short kid with a conservative upbringing became one of the most desired men in adult entertainment, and why confidence has far more to do with self-awareness, humility, and emotional intelligence than looks, height, or stats on a dating app. They go deep on real intimacy versus performative sex, porn myths versus real-life pleasure, and how men can become better lovers by listening, learning, and caring more about their partner’s experience than their own ego. Topics covered include: The “Short King” mindset and why height doesn’t matterMasculinity, confidence, and owning what you can’t changePenis size myths and sexual insecurityWhy personality beats looks in real attractionDating apps, stats culture, and first impressionsPorn vs real sex (and why porn is not sex education)Communication, consent, and “checking in” during sexReading body language, sounds, and partner feedbackHelping partners orgasm without killing the vibeUsing vibrators, magic wands, and toys with confidenceSexual worship, power dynamics, and mutual pleasureLearning from women and having real female friendshipsDating as a porn star and navigating fans vs real intimacyPerformative sex vs lazy, intimate, off-camera connectionOnlyFans, AI digital duplicates, and fantasy fulfillmentErectile health, Viagra and injectable performance drugsAaron’s natural erection health routine Thank you Splash Blanket for keeping me and my guests cozy ◡̈  Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beducate.me/pd2602-alexa

    1h 15m
  3. JAN 15

    Sex Communication: If You’re Not Talking, You’re Guessing (ft. Elizabeth Ashford)

    Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with certified holistic sex educator and Beyond the Beez founder Elizabeth Ashford for a deeply practical, funny, and no-BS conversation about talking during sex—and why silence, shame, and faking orgasms are some of the biggest barriers to good sex. From dirty talk and giving direction to toys, lube, boundaries, aftercare, and post-sex debriefs, this episode is a masterclass in how communication transforms intimacy, pleasure, and connection. In this episode, Alexa and Elizabeth discuss: Why silence during sex creates insecurity and confusionDirty talk vs simply communicating during sexUsing your voice for pleasure, direction, and curiosityWhy most people struggle to talk during sexCultural shame, lack of sex education, and sexual confidenceFinding your sexual voice and understanding your desiresWhy dirty talk looks different for everyoneTrauma, shame, BDSM experience, and comfort levels with dirty talkBlending dirty talk with practical directionGiving feedback without killing the moodStarting with positive reinforcement before giving directionHow safety makes sexual communication easierHow faking orgasms reinforces bad sex habitsWhy honesty leads to better long-term sexThe orgasm gap and why penetration alone isn’t enoughWhy partners need to genuinely care about your pleasureOral sex as a baseline expectation, not a bonus“Non-eaters” as a dealbreakerCuriosity as the foundation of good sexSex worth having vs sex worth avoidingStarter phrases for people new to dirty talkKeeping dirty talk simple and naturalCompliments during sex and feeling desiredPost-sex communication and debriefingAftercare beyond cuddlingTalking about what worked and what didn’tPorn, audio erotica, and learning language for desireErotic menus and yes/maybe/no frameworksBorrowing phrases instead of reinventing dirty talk Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beducate.me/pd2602-alexa Thank you Splash Blanket for keeping me and my guests cozy ◡̈

    50 min
  4. JAN 8

    Real vs Fake Doms: How to Tell Them Apart (ft. Sir Marvelous)

    Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with pleasure coach, intimacy educator, and professional Dom Sir Marvelous for a conversation about real dominance, fake Doms, pleasure-centered sex, and why communication and patience are the foundation of good BDSM—and good sex in general. This episode breaks down what dominance actually looks like beyond performance, how to spot manipulative dynamics early, and why prioritizing pleasure leads to deeper trust, safety, and better sex. In this episode, Alexa and Sir Marvelous discuss: What actually makes someone a real Dom vs a fake DomWhy “pleasure Dom” is often misunderstood and misusedHow fake Doms weaponize submissive language on dating appsManipulation, rushing dynamics, and early red flagsPatience as the most attractive and essential Dom skillWhy dominance is about giving and not controllingWhy dominance doesn’t have to include pain, whips, or chainsEating p***y before, during, and after penetrationAnxiety, erections, and why losing one isn’t a failureStrap-ons, toys, and removing ego from penetrationAsking better questions about pleasure and satisfactionThe brain as the biggest sex organPost-sex debriefing: what worked, what didn’t, what to do more ofAdvocating for pleasure in Dom/sub dynamicsBeginner Dom mistakes to avoidWhy Doms should experience submission or bottomingPerformative dominance vs authentic presence Thank you Splash Blanket for keeping me and my guests cozy ◡̈

    50 min
  5. JAN 1

    Vulnerability Is Hot: Sex, Masculinity, & Oversharing (ft. Emi Larraud)

    Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with musician and content creator Emi Larraud for a raw, funny, and deeply honest conversation about vulnerability, masculinity, oversharing on the internet, and why emotional availability makes men more desirable and better lovers. From shitting yourself on the subway to tips on how to be more vulnerable, this episode explores how being human, communicative, and emotionally present leads to better sex, safer intimacy, and more meaningful connections. In this episode, Alexa and Emi discuss: Masculinity, patriarchy, and how it harms menWhy toughness, aggression, and emotional suppression are not attractiveHealthy masculinity and being raised with emotional permissionMen crying, expressing emotions, and being fully humanHow emotional openness improves dating and sexWhy men shouldn’t center other men’s approvalSeeking male validation vs caring what women actually wantListening to women instead of guessing what they wantBeing bisexual and how that shaped Emi’s perspective on intimacyThe hot take: men who refuse to eat pussy are kinda gayWhy vulnerability filters out the wrong peopleGetting approached more after being emotionally openEmotional growth through therapyHolding male friends accountable for harmful jokesSex, intimacy, and performance anxietyFeeling pressure to perform sexuallyLiking women vs just wanting to fuck them Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey. https://beducate.me/pd2602-alexa Thank you Splash Blanket for keeping my guests cozy and mess-free 3 🔥 Want more? Join my ⁠Patreon⁠ for unedited episodes, behind-the-scenes tea on my personal dating & sex life, and access to my Close Friends on Instagram!

    56 min
  6. 12/25/2025

    How Erotic Hypnosis Can Transform Your Sex Life (ft. Kate Shelor)

    Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with hypnotherapist and intimacy coach Kate Shelor for an in-depth conversation about erotic hypnosis, the subconscious mind, and how our thoughts, beliefs, and emotional conditioning shape pleasure, desire, and orgasm. Recorded on the Temptation Cruise, this episode breaks down what hypnosis really is, how it differs from pop-culture myths, and how erotic hypnosis can help people get out of their heads, release sexual shame, and reconnect with their bodies. In this episode, Alexa and Kate discuss: The role of the subconscious mind in sex, pleasure, and behaviorWhy so many people struggle to stay present during sexAnxiety, body image, and self-conscious thoughts in the bedroomHow hypnosis helps people get out of their heads and into sensationWhy all hypnosis is ultimately self-hypnosisConsent, collaboration, and personal agency in hypnosisCommon myths about hypnosis from movies and pop cultureWhether some people are “more hypnotizable” than othersSexual blocks related to orgasms, erections, and arousalKate’s personal journey using hypnotherapy to overcome orgasm strugglesHow language and self-talk program sexual responsesThe power of repetition in shaping subconscious beliefsBlindfolds, sensory deprivation, and imagination in erotic playPractical self-hypnosis and mindset exercises for homeAuditing negative self-talk and replacing it intentionallyRewriting old conditioning with new emotional experiencesWhy the subconscious mind overrides logic every timeSurrounding yourself with sex-positive language and mediaThe best time of day for self-hypnosisHow long hypnosis takes to create change🔥 Want more? Join my ⁠Patreon⁠ for unedited episodes, behind-the-scenes tea on my personal dating & sex life, and access to my Close Friends on Instagram!

    54 min
  7. 12/18/2025

    Decentering Penetration: Tantra, Orgasms & Expansive Sex (ft. Davia Frost)

    Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with tantric practitioner, pleasure educator, and soon-to-be author Davia Frost for a deep conversation about decentering penetration and expanding what sex can be. Recorded on the Temptation Cruise, this episode explores how slowing down, breathing, presence, and creativity can lead to more satisfying, intimate, and embodied pleasure without sex needing to revolve around penetration. We discuss: What it means to decenter penetration and why penetration is overemphasized in mainstream culture How expanding your definition of sex increases pleasure, intimacy, and satisfaction Why heterosexual couples tend to rush to intercourse and how this limits pleasure Using the full body as an instrument of pleasure rather than focusing only on genitals Slowing down, softening the body, and learning how to receive pleasure Myths around sex, obligation, and the idea that penetration is required Making penetration optional without sex feeling “incomplete” Erogenous zones beyond genitals (neck, ears, inner thighs, behind the knees, clavicle, elbows, nipples) Nipple play and nipple orgasms Different types of orgasms and expanding orgasmic capacity Breathwork, sound, humming, and tantra as tools for pleasure Why holding your breath can limit orgasmic potential Presence vs performance in sex Oral sex as intimacy, honoring, and shared pleasure rather than a chore Eye gazing, kissing, dirty talk, and touch as deeply intimate acts Ego, vulnerability, and why sex often ends when penetration ends Ending sex based on satisfaction, not orgasms or penetration Communication strategies for talking about pleasure without hurting egos Sexual menus, check-ins, and having conversations outside the bedroom Scheduling intimacy, playfulness, and creative erotic invitations What straight couples can learn from queer sex culture Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 50% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up: https://beducate.me/pd2548-alexa 🔥 Want more? Join my ⁠Patreon⁠ for unedited episodes, behind-the-scenes tea on my personal dating & sex life, and access to my Close Friends on Instagram!

    47 min
4.7
out of 5
54 Ratings

About

The no-b******t sex and relationship podcast where sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) says everything you're too afraid to. Stop having mediocre sex and level up your game! 🎧 New episodes every week.

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