The ENM DNM

Constantly Training
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  • Sexuality

Welcome to The ENM DNM, the podcast where we have deep and meaningful (DNM) conversations about ethical non-monogamy (ENM). Whether you're curious, practising, or deep in the trenches of polyamorous life, this show holds space for all the messy, joyful, complex realities of ENM.Each episode dives into different themes, from getting started, to communication struggles, identity, dating stories, and how ENM intersects with the wider (often mononormative) world. You’ll hear honest stories, personal experiences, and the occasional bit of swearing, laughter, or tea-spilling.This isn’t a how-to guide. It’s not prescriptive. It’s a space to reflect, connect, and hear how others are navigating ENM in all its forms. We're queer-run, community-focused, and proud of the diversity of voices we platform. Want to join our community chat? Find links and info at Ko-fi.com/ENMDNM Follow us and share the show with your polycules, metamours, mates, or anyone trying to figure out how to love more than one human at a time. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  1. 2d ago

    The ENM Glossary: What Do These Words Even Mean?

    In this episode, Adam and Leonie are joined by Ari to attempt something brave, foolish and probably impossible: making sense of some of the terms people use in ENM and non-monogamy. From ENM, CNM and NM to relationship anarchy, monogamish, hierarchy and whatever relationship libertarianism is meant to be, they unpack the words, the assumptions behind them, and why definitions are rarely as simple as they sound. The conversation moves between actual glossary-style explanations and the messier reality of how these labels show up in dating, relationships, community and identity. They talk about ethics, consent, autonomy, ownership, “doing the work”, and why some terms can feel useful while others can feel confusing, loaded or a bit wanky. It’s a funny, honest and reflective episode about language, labels, strong opinions, and trying to describe the very human mess of non-monogamy without pretending anyone has the perfect definition. Loved the episode? Want to help keep The ENM DNM alive, growing and making gorgeous chaos? Support the podcast with a one-off or ongoing donation here Your support helps us make the podcast and helps fund free and subsidised therapy for people who may not otherwise access it. Come say hi or follow along: socials Want to book a counselling session with Adam? Get in touch here: Halaxy We’re also keen to hear from collaborators, sponsors, guests and partners. Please note: this podcast is for conversation and reflection, not therapy, medical advice or crisis support. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 19m

  2. Jun 9

    Dear ENM DNM: The calendar is the metamour

    In this episode, Adam and Leonie open up the Dear ENM DNM inbox after someone writes in about a very familiar ENM problem: the calendar. They talk through a situation involving nesting, shifting plans, rotating rosters, and what happens when “our time” keeps being moved in the name of flexibility. The conversation gets into quality time, resentment, autonomy, agreements, and the difference between being flexible and quietly feeling like you’re getting the leftovers. Adam and Leonie also talk about what it means to feel prioritised in ENM, why “this is just what non-monogamy looks like” can feel dismissive, and how hard it can be to have a proper conversation before resentment starts setting up camp. It’s a messy, honest and reflective episode about time, care, calendars, and trying to stay connected when everyone’s availability is doing the absolute most. Loved the episode? Want to help keep The ENM DNM alive, growing and making gorgeous chaos? Support the podcast with a one-off or ongoing donation here Your support helps us make the podcast and helps fund free and subsidised therapy for people who may not otherwise access it. Come say hi or follow along: socials Want to book a counselling session with Adam? Get in touch here: Halaxy We’re also keen to hear from collaborators, sponsors, guests and partners. Please note: this podcast is for conversation and reflection, not therapy, medical advice or crisis support. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 12m

  3. Jun 2

    The Manifesting Canine: Love, Ghosting and the Relationship Escalator

    In this episode, Adam and Leonie move from canine chaos and accidental innuendo into a bigger conversation about dating, ghosting and what happens when connection does not quite land the way we hoped. After Leonie shares the emotional comedown of two promising connections going quiet, the conversation opens up around ghosting, mixed signals, therapy-speak, emotional responsibility and the difference between someone meaning something in the moment versus being able to follow through with care. They also unpack Olivia Dean’s Something in Between and use it as a jumping-off point to explore freedom, autonomy and what it means for love to have room to breathe within ENM. From there, Adam and Leonie dig into the relationship escalator, the pressure to make relationships “progress” in expected ways, and how non-monogamy can invite us to question what commitment, growth and legitimacy actually look like. It’s a funny, reflective and very honest episode about desire, disappointment, liberation and learning how to sit somewhere in between. Loved the episode? Want to help keep The ENM DNM alive, growing and making gorgeous chaos? Support the podcast with a one-off or ongoing donation here Your support helps us make the podcast and helps fund free and subsidised therapy for people who may not otherwise access it. Come say hi or follow along: socials Want to book a counselling session with Adam? Get in touch here: Halaxy We’re also keen to hear from collaborators, sponsors, guests and partners. Please note: this podcast is for conversation and reflection, not therapy, medical advice or crisis support. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 5m

  4. May 26

    What It’s Like to Date Adam and Leonie

    In this episode, Adam and Leonie turn the mic on themselves and unpack what it’s actually like to date them. From communication styles and emotional needs to attraction, boundaries and the little quirks that show up in relationships, they reflect on how they each move through dating in ENM. Along the way, they talk about what they value, what can be hard, and what partners might notice when getting close to them. It’s honest, playful and a little exposing — a conversation about self-awareness, compatibility and what dating can reveal about who we are. Loved the episode? Want to help keep The ENM DNM alive, growing and making gorgeous chaos? Support the podcast with a one-off or ongoing donation here Your support helps us make the podcast and helps fund free and subsidised therapy for people who may not otherwise access it. Come say hi or follow along: socials Want to book a counselling session with Adam? Get in touch here: Halaxy We’re also keen to hear from collaborators, sponsors, guests and partners. Please note: this podcast is for conversation and reflection, not therapy, medical advice or crisis support. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 15m

  5. May 19

    Adam: Vulnerability, Masculinity and ENM

    In this episode, Leonie turns the mic on Adam. They talk about how he first found his way into ethical non-monogamy, what opening up a relationship actually looked like in practice, and how those early experiences shaped the way he understands connection, communication and intimacy now. The conversation also goes deeper into masculinity, body image, self-worth and the long shadow of feeling like your body is being seen before you are. Adam reflects on living with visible scars, how that impacted the way he moved through ENM spaces, and what it has meant to be desired, vulnerable and honest in relationships. This one is personal. It’s about the stories we carry, the ways we change, and what ENM can uncover when it pushes us to look more closely at ourselves. Loved the episode? Want to help keep The ENM DNM alive, growing and making gorgeous chaos? Support the podcast with a one-off or ongoing donation here Your support helps us make the podcast and helps fund free and subsidised therapy for people who may not otherwise access it. Come say hi or follow along: socials Want to book a counselling session with Adam? Get in touch here: Halaxy We’re also keen to hear from collaborators, sponsors, guests and partners. Please note: this podcast is for conversation and reflection, not therapy, medical advice or crisis support. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 20m

  6. May 12

    Raw-Dogging Leonie: Is Ne-Yo’s Take So Sick?

    In this episode, we try something a little different. Adam brings in a social media clip of Ne-Yo talking about polyamory, and Leonie reacts to it in real time, with no prep, no pre-planning, and no idea where the conversation is about to go. What starts as a playful raw reaction quickly turns into something much bigger: a conversation about ownership, exclusivity, control, gender, power, and the uneasy line between what gets called polyamory and what might actually be something else. As the clip unfolds, we unpack what it brings up for us through an ENM lens, including the difference between consent and ethics, the responsibility that comes with public conversations about non-monogamy, and how quickly language can shape the way people understand a relationship dynamic. This episode is about Ne-Yo, reaction, projection, and the messy questions that can emerge when a public take on polyamory collides with the lived values of ENM. Along the way, we also talk about parties, overstimulation, social anxiety, desire, and the ways discomfort can make us reach for control instead of curiosity. This episode is about Ne-Yo, reaction, projection, and the messy questions that can emerge when a public take on polyamory collides with the lived values of ENM. Loved the episode? Want to help keep The ENM DNM alive, growing and making gorgeous chaos? Support the podcast with a one-off or ongoing donation here Your support helps us make the podcast and helps fund free and subsidised therapy for people who may not otherwise access it. Come say hi or follow along: socials Want to book a counselling session with Adam? Get in touch here: Halaxy We’re also keen to hear from collaborators, sponsors, guests and partners. Please note: this podcast is for conversation and reflection, not therapy, medical advice or crisis support. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 5m

  7. May 5

    The return of Ari

    In this episode, Ari returns to the podcast for a much deeper check-in. What starts as a catch-up quickly opens into a conversation about what has changed since the first episodes, what dating has looked like since then, and what it actually means to keep growing inside ethical non-monogamy rather than just talking about it. We explore the gap between theory and practice, the difference between knowing the language of ENM and actually living it, and the hard, often uncomfortable work of learning your patterns, your triggers, your limits, and your needs. Along the way, we talk about dating apps, community, self-awareness, co-regulation, grief, emotional honesty, and the question of what happens when you stop trying to be who you think ENM should make you and start paying closer attention to who you actually are. This is also a conversation about accountability: owning the parts of ourselves that do not always show up well, reflecting on relationships that have ended, and recognising that growth is not just about understanding other people, but about understanding the impact we have too. This episode is about dating, self-knowledge, emotional regulation, and the ongoing work of becoming more honest with yourself and others inside non-monogamy. Loved the episode? Want to help keep The ENM DNM alive, growing and making gorgeous chaos? Support the podcast with a one-off or ongoing donation here Your support helps us make the podcast and helps fund free and subsidised therapy for people who may not otherwise access it. Come say hi or follow along: socials Want to book a counselling session with Adam? Get in touch here: Halaxy We’re also keen to hear from collaborators, sponsors, guests and partners. Please note: this podcast is for conversation and reflection, not therapy, medical advice or crisis support. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 42m

  8. Apr 28

    Hierarchy in ENM

    In this episode, we take on one of the most loaded and misunderstood topics in ethical non-monogamy: hierarchy. Rather than treating hierarchy as something simple or automatically bad, we sit with the messier reality of what it actually means in practice, who benefits from it, and why people so often struggle to name it honestly. We explore the difference between equality and equity, the role of privilege and access in relationships, and the tension between what people wish they could offer and what they can realistically offer. Along the way, we talk about primary partners, power, fairness, expectations, and the problems that can emerge when hierarchy is either denied, hidden, or softened with language that avoids the truth. This is not an episode about easy answers or rigid rules. It is a conversation about honesty, structure, and the importance of being clear about what kind of relationship you are actually building. This episode is about hierarchy, privilege, relational reality, and the difficult but necessary work of naming things as they really are. Loved the episode? Want to help keep The ENM DNM alive, growing and making gorgeous chaos? Support the podcast with a one-off or ongoing donation here Your support helps us make the podcast and helps fund free and subsidised therapy for people who may not otherwise access it. Come say hi or follow along: socials Want to book a counselling session with Adam? Get in touch here: Halaxy We’re also keen to hear from collaborators, sponsors, guests and partners. Please note: this podcast is for conversation and reflection, not therapy, medical advice or crisis support. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    54 min
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Trailer

About

Welcome to The ENM DNM, the podcast where we have deep and meaningful (DNM) conversations about ethical non-monogamy (ENM). Whether you're curious, practising, or deep in the trenches of polyamorous life, this show holds space for all the messy, joyful, complex realities of ENM.Each episode dives into different themes, from getting started, to communication struggles, identity, dating stories, and how ENM intersects with the wider (often mononormative) world. You’ll hear honest stories, personal experiences, and the occasional bit of swearing, laughter, or tea-spilling.This isn’t a how-to guide. It’s not prescriptive. It’s a space to reflect, connect, and hear how others are navigating ENM in all its forms. We're queer-run, community-focused, and proud of the diversity of voices we platform. Want to join our community chat? Find links and info at Ko-fi.com/ENMDNM Follow us and share the show with your polycules, metamours, mates, or anyone trying to figure out how to love more than one human at a time. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Information

  • Creator
    Constantly Training
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    20
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Constantly Training
  • Show Website
    The ENM DNM

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