Rock Bottom With Ryan

rockbottomwithryan

After 18 years of drinking, countless blackouts, arrests, and hospital stays, I finally hit my bottom—and started to climb. This podcast is about what it really looks like to get sober. No sugarcoating. No step-by-step manual. Just honest conversations about addiction, recovery, relapse, and everything in between. If you’ve struggled, if someone you love is struggling, or if you just want to understand the chaos behind the bottle—this is for you. Let’s talk about what happens after rock bottom.

  1. 17h ago

    158: From Last Call to High Calling - Dr. Ashley Amundson

    Ashley Amundson: From Bartending & Alcohol Withdrawal to 10 Years Sober, COO & Therapist | Rock Bottom with RyanOn Rock Bottom with Ryan, Ashley Amundson shares growing up in San Diego in a complex military family with six siblings and a live-in nanny, feeling like she didn’t belong in school, and using alcohol as a tool for confidence that became a crutch. After entering the bar industry at 21, drinking escalated from after-work shots to on-the-job use, leading to physical dependence, repeated hospitalizations, DT hallucinations, and a doctor warning she might not live to 35 due to organ failure and alcoholic hepatitis. Ashley chose rehab, built early sobriety through structured sober living and testing, and transitioned from bartending to working in a women’s-only holistic rehab. She earned a master’s, became a therapist in 2020, completed a doctorate in behavioral health, rose to COO, and discusses trauma-informed modalities like somatic work, breathwork, Reiki, EMDR, and brain spotting.00:00 High School Awkwardness01:10 Rock Bottom Intro01:34 Sponsor Message02:58 Meet Ashley03:16 Recovery Basics04:54 Military Family Roots08:16 Nanny and Attachment10:50 Teen Identity Struggles14:37 First Drinks and Confidence18:37 Skipping School and College22:35 Bar Industry Begins25:14 Dating and Boundaries28:41 Drinking Culture Escalates31:55 Naivety and Masking35:10 Alcohol Takes Over39:02 Hallucinations and Fallout39:36 ER Withdrawal Stigma42:00 Doctor Wake Up Call47:47 Underdog Motivation49:14 Early Sobriety Blueprint52:40 From Tech to COO58:15 Holistic Trauma Modalities01:02:35 Therapist Mindset and Burnout01:08:37 Advice and Compassion01:14:00 Closing Quote and Wrap

    1h 17m
  2. 2d ago

    157: Recovery Rebel - Ashley Baker's Story

    On Rock Bottom with Ryan, guest Ashley Baker shares how childhood trauma—his mother’s two suicide attempts and his father leaving—fed rebellion and led him to start drinking at 12 while growing up in Dubai. Alcohol quickly became daily, escalating after moving to Germany where access was easier and drinking was normalized in the restaurant industry as he trained and worked as a chef. At his worst he needed two bottles of wine in the morning to stop shaking, blacked out for years, and once woke in jail after passing out on rail tracks shortly before a train. After a two-week rehab stay and a brief relapse, he returned to treatment and stayed sober, building a new life through routines, travel, spirituality, and self-directed learning. Now 17 years sober, he’s an addiction coach with a holistic approach focused on trauma, nervous system regulation, breathwork, and long-term healing.00:00 Trauma And Drinking00:53 Podcast Intro And Sponsor02:33 Meet Ashley Baker04:10 Roots Of Addiction06:38 First Drinks At 1208:48 Daily Drinking Escalation10:24 Wake Up Calls And Withdrawals13:32 Blackouts And Jail Scare15:17 Hiding It From Loved Ones17:41 Rehab Decision Point20:59 Relapse And Second Rehab26:19 Life After Treatment29:14 Chef Life Sober30:26 Cravings and Confidence31:44 Purpose Through Coaching33:12 Holistic Counselor Training35:06 Healing Beyond Detox37:04 ADHD Depression Patterns38:17 Regulation Tools Breathwork41:21 Neuroplasticity and Identity43:42 Chef Work and Youth46:19 Legacy and Lifelong Healing53:36 Getting Help and Contact59:18 Grounded Practices Farewell

    1h 3m
  3. 5d ago

    156: A Conversation with Meghan Hanes

    From Social Anxiety to Two Bottles a Night: Meghan Haynes on Alcohol Recovery, Treatment, and Sober-Curious SupportOn Rock Bottom with Ryan, guest Meghan Haynes (sober date February 19, 2023; alcohol; raised in Washington, now in Central Oregon) shares how perfectionism, social anxiety, and not fitting in led her to love alcohol after her first drink in high school. In college at the University of Washington, loss of control contributed to severe anorexia and hospitalization; therapy helped, but later her drinking escalated through Greek-life culture, grad school isolation in Denver, and solo nightly wine—often up to two bottles—while working in mental health crisis roles. After pancreatitis, a DUI, repeated IOP failures, and probation, she entered 30-day treatment, where she found relief, began addressing codependency, self-worth, and coping, and met her future husband. Now an Oregon LCSW, she offers trauma-focused therapy (including EMDR) and sobriety coaching for sober-curious women to reduce stigma, build community, and support change without needing “rock bottom.” 00:00 Small Town Roots01:09 Podcast Intro01:38 Sponsor Message02:39 Meet Meghan Haynes03:50 Gymnast Identity05:14 Social Anxiety Emerges08:20 First Drink Relief11:38 College Expectations Crash13:20 Anorexia Takes Over16:04 Therapy and Alcohol Return17:11 Greek Life Drinking Culture24:49 Grad School Isolation28:23 Living Alone Spiral30:02 Functional Drinking Rewards31:16 Solo Drinking Spiral31:41 A Day in Addiction34:04 Isolation and Family Signs35:38 Health Scare and DUI40:25 Treatment Turning Point42:28 Recovery Insights and Self Worth45:27 Love and Life After Rehab47:01 Therapist in Recovery48:37 Sober Curious Explained51:09 Women and Recovery Challenges55:04 Advice and Closing Resources

    1h 1m
  4. Jun 10

    155: Dry Culture - Jonny Chase

    From After-Hours Chaos to 815 Days Sober: Jonny’s Recovery & Dry Culture Fitness Blueprint | Rock Bottom with RyanRyan interviews Jonny, founder of Dry Culture, about his recovery from alcohol (and cocaine in the mix) after years of escalating binge drinking that began in high school, intensified at Southern Illinois, and continued into his 30s with after-hours bars, blackouts, fights, jail, and dangerous close calls. Jonny says he struggled with moderation early, used alcohol to mask insecurity and social anxiety, and later maintained work while drinking heavily and chasing validation. A turning point came at 33 after a Thursday-to-Sunday bender when he saw older bar regulars and decided to stop, told his girlfriend and parents he needed help, and went to 30 days of rehab in California. He built structure through fitness, lost over 50 pounds, ran the LA Marathon, became a personal trainer, and created Dry Culture, a 30-day workbook centered on identity, movement, discipline, and environment, aiming to build a sober wellness community.00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro00:30 Sober Date and Basics01:24 Early Drinking Signs03:05 First Drunk Feeling05:02 High School Consequences06:35 College Party Escalation08:56 Legal Trouble and Jail09:48 Dating and Hookups10:32 Post College Benders11:25 Cocaine Enters the Mix12:20 After Hours Lifestyle13:42 Withdrawal and Denial15:35 Arizona and Identity17:15 Dangerous Close Calls22:02 How Much Was Consumed23:29 Girlfriend and Trolling25:04 Drinking Alone and Validation26:05 Holding Down a Job26:58 Choosing to Quit27:59 Bar Mirror Moment30:25 Calling Family for Help32:53 Inside 30 Day Rehab35:39 Fitness as Lifeline37:07 Building Dry Culture39:45 Program Pillars Explained43:03 Fitness and Discipline45:43 Community and Vulnerability47:57 Staying Sober in Real Life50:42 Routine Over Chaos53:18 Advice Goals and Quote

    57 min
  5. Jun 8

    154: The End of a Chapter - Devin Fish

    On Rock Bottom with Ryan, author and Army soldier Devin Fish from Rockford, Illinois discusses growing up in poverty and instability, moving more than 16 times, bullying and extreme shyness, and witnessing addiction in his family, including his father’s cocaine-and-alcohol-fueled breakdown and his mother’s pain medication dependence. Devin shares how self-hatred and loneliness led him into a yearlong cycle of paid dating apps, catfishing, escalating blackmail scams—including an “age scam”—financial loss, and contracting chlamydia after paying for sex, culminating in suicidal ideation and later admitting himself to the hospital in 2022. He explains his book, “Answering the Hard Questions: Let It Be the End of the Chapter, Not the End of the Book,” its memoir/toolbox/journaling structure, his return to faith while writing, and his mission to spread honesty, truth, and hope to help others survive. 00:00 Early Chaos at Home00:41 Show Intro and Guest01:44 Growing Up in Rockford02:42 Unstable Childhood and Poverty04:24 Shy Kid and Bullying05:37 Dad Arrest and Apartment Scene09:48 Mom Opioids and Dysfunction11:53 Joining the Army to Escape13:43 Depression and Suicidal Thoughts16:03 Avoiding Substances and Facing Trauma18:02 Hard Truths and Blackmail19:48 Dating Sites Spiral and Scams22:17 STD Scare and Breaking Point24:13 Age Scam Explained and Second Attempt26:13 Hope for Real Connection27:23 Choosing Self Love27:44 Year of Online Scams28:27 Book Title Origins30:47 Writing and Publishing Sprint31:33 Healing Through Structure32:54 Hardest Chapters to Write34:20 Forgiveness and Family35:20 Meaning of the Subtitle36:35 Handling Setbacks Publicly37:46 Next Book and Faith39:24 Mental Health Misconceptions40:38 Message to Suicidal Viewers41:49 Mission After Publishing43:12 Dating Apps Are Predatory45:41 Breaking Silence in Recovery47:38 Support Without Enabling48:25 Avoiding Old Patterns50:46 Guilt Versus Accountability51:53 Leaving Readers With Hope54:57 Where to Find Devin56:30 Final Advice and Quotes57:23 Closing Reflections

    58 min
  6. Jun 3

    152: Fit and Free - Patrick's Story of Addiction

    Patrick, born and raised in Chicago, shares how childhood abuse and emotional neglect contributed to early marijuana use, dealing in high school, and multiple treatment stays that initially led to more connections to get high. At 18 he unknowingly tried heroin at a party, quickly progressed from snorting to injecting daily, cycled in and out of court-ordered treatment, and eventually became homeless with a $100-a-day habit, surviving through hustling and illegal activity. After a suicidal overdose attempt and a moment of clarity, he entered detox, received Suboxone, and transitioned to a suburban treatment center where he connected with a sponsor and began AA step work, including a transformative fourth and fifth step. Now sober since 5/3/18, he focuses on fatherhood, fitness, boundaries, and sharing recovery through speaking and social media. 00:00 From Pills to Heroin00:59 Recovery Mindset Shift01:19 Show Intro and Sponsor03:42 Meet Patrick Sober Story05:13 Childhood Trauma in Chicago09:10 Weed and Early Warning Signs10:36 Treatment and Escalation11:43 First Heroin High13:15 Needles and Losing Control15:52 Homeless Rock Bottom19:44 Suicidal Moment and Detox22:59 Detox to Treatment Breakthrough25:00 AA Meeting Full Circle26:49 Step Work and Healing Trauma29:18 Fast Track Steps One to Three31:10 Fourth Step Deep Dive32:12 Promises and Spiritual Shift35:04 Amends and Family Fallout40:21 Boundaries Protect Sobriety42:30 Quiet Life After Chaos44:27 Social Media Recovery Reach46:31 Any Path That Saves Lives48:03 Sober Strong Partnership52:17 Advice and Closing Thanks

    55 min
  7. Jun 2

    151: Childhood Trauma - From Innocence to Addiction (Quick Sip with Ryan and Rachel)

    In this Quick Sip episode of Rock Bottom with Ryan and Rachel, they discuss how traumatic childhood experiences shaped their adult lives and addictions. Rachel reflects on the anniversary of her mother’s overdose when she was 16, the guilt of pushing her mother out of the apartment the last day she saw her, and how grief contributed to her drinking, compounded this year by the recent death of her mother-in-law. Ryan shares how frequent moves after his parents’ divorce, changing schools, unstable relationships, and childhood sexual trauma affected his ability to settle and influenced his later relationships and substance use. Both talk about neglect, abandonment issues, repeating learned behaviors, making amends with parents, and continuing recovery, while also shouting out Sober Strong Apparel’s support and mission.00:00 Childhood Innocence Lost00:32 Addiction and Family Amends01:23 Rock Bottom Intro01:53 Sponsor Message02:53 Trauma and Grief Setup03:34 Mom Overdose Anniversary04:25 Guilt and Healing06:54 Mother In Law Loss08:22 Moving and Instability11:25 Sexual Trauma Impact12:24 Neglect and Loneliness15:15 Repeating the Pattern17:05 Relationship Blueprints20:43 Abandonment and Early Attention22:25 Seeking Love Wrong Places23:52 Ratchet Rachel Origins24:38 The One Childhood Change25:10 Missing Mother Figure25:38 Shoutout Two Girls26:55 Ryan's Nana and Moving29:51 Private School and Poverty31:53 Gratitude for Support32:47 Amazing Grace and Grief34:19 Pushing Through Sober37:08 Sober Strong Community39:46 Why Sober Strong Hits43:20 Wrap Up and DM Us

    44 min

Ratings & Reviews

4.3
out of 5
8 Ratings

About

After 18 years of drinking, countless blackouts, arrests, and hospital stays, I finally hit my bottom—and started to climb. This podcast is about what it really looks like to get sober. No sugarcoating. No step-by-step manual. Just honest conversations about addiction, recovery, relapse, and everything in between. If you’ve struggled, if someone you love is struggling, or if you just want to understand the chaos behind the bottle—this is for you. Let’s talk about what happens after rock bottom.

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