Rock Bottom With Ryan

rockbottomwithryan
  • 4.3 (8)
  • Mental Health

After 18 years of drinking, countless blackouts, arrests, and hospital stays, I finally hit my bottom—and started to climb. This podcast is about what it really looks like to get sober. No sugarcoating. No step-by-step manual. Just honest conversations about addiction, recovery, relapse, and everything in between. If you’ve struggled, if someone you love is struggling, or if you just want to understand the chaos behind the bottle—this is for you. Let’s talk about what happens after rock bottom.

  1. 2d ago

    Real Talk Session 3 - Love, Boundaries, and Rock Bottom: When Helping Starts Hurting (With Amber)

    Boundaries vs Ultimatums: Enabling, Rock Bottom, and Real Recovery | Rock Bottom with Ryan (ft. Amber)Ryan and guest Amber discuss the difference between boundaries and ultimatums, emphasizing self-respect, accountability, and how recovery helped them stop people-pleasing and codependency. They explore enabling in addiction and relationships, including how rescuing someone can delay consequences and “steal their first step,” and why learning to say no can protect both parties. The conversation covers loving people from a distance, communicating needs instead of ghosting, and holding firm standards—even with family—while leaving the door open for healthy dialogue. They share personal rock bottom experiences involving alcohol-induced seizures and denial, and discuss how comparing trauma or addiction can lead to minimization. They also stress that time sober does not equal recovery, advocating ongoing work, community, and integrity.00:00 Boundaries vs Ultimatums01:13 Recovery Beyond Sobriety01:36 Show Intro and Sponsor03:11 Enabling and Saying No06:36 Healthy Boundaries in Relationships09:44 Loving From a Distance13:13 Intuition and Mental Health Limits17:33 Family Boundaries and Vulnerability22:36 Rock Bottom and Rescue Cycles27:13 Hospital Wake Up Call28:53 Seizures And Still Drinking30:11 Excuses And Denial Spiral31:52 Comparing Rock Bottoms33:26 Not That Kind Of Addict36:41 Integrity Over Sobriety Time39:58 Dry Drunk Warning Signs44:48 Copy The Right People46:07 Boundaries And Accountability48:59 Community And Closing Thoughts

  2. 5d ago

    Vernon: Out of the Blue

    Vernon West: Two Sobriety Dates, Higher Power, and Beating Leukemia | Rock Bottom with RyanRyan welcomes Vernon West (Out of the Blue podcast) to discuss recovery, Vernon’s two sobriety dates (Jan 30, 1990 and Aug 2, 11 years ago), and his path through addiction and the 12 steps. Vernon shares growing up with an alcoholic father, attending Al-Anon at 14, and his father’s relapse and death from cirrhosis after nine months sober. Vernon describes his own progression from weed to heavy drinking and drugs, a near-fatal accident chasing cocaine, and entering a Hollywood detox where an AA speaker helped him understand finding a personal higher power; he got a sponsor and committed to meetings and rigorous honesty. After years sober, he stopped meetings, was diagnosed with prostate cancer, relapsed on weed, later faced leukemia, stayed sober through treatment, and credits service and the program for survival. He also explains creating Out of the Blue during a nine-month COVID hospital stay and reads his “Garden of the 12 Steps” piece.00:00 Higher Power Spark00:58 Show Intro Montage01:52 Sponsor Message02:40 Meet Vernon West03:20 Two Sober Dates03:50 Growing Up With Alcoholism05:42 Dad Gets Sober Then Relapses07:42 Music Career And Drugs12:30 Engagement Jackpot Story14:56 Detox To Hollywood16:50 Finding A Higher Power21:38 Working The Steps Daily23:56 Forgiveness Through Prayer25:18 Drifting From Meetings27:11 Cancer Diagnosis Spiral28:12 Weed Relapse Escalation29:21 Leukemia Wake Up Call30:25 Staying Sober In Crisis31:53 Service During Hospital Stay33:24 Starting Out Of The Blue36:09 Building The Podcast Team37:58 Garden Of The 12 Steps41:01 Cake Mix Steps Analogy42:55 Recovery Community Reflections45:23 Closing Gratitude And Advice

  3. Sep 2

    Bruce Haataja: Chaos Between My Ears

    Bruce Haataja on Chaos Between My Ears, Bipolar 1, and Recovery | Rock Bottom with RyanOn Rock Bottom with Ryan, Bruce Haataja discusses his debut book Chaos Between My Ears and the internal “committee” of voices that fueled his depression, confusion, and addiction. Raised in small-town Minnesota, he describes leaving traditional school, joining the National Guard at 17, and progressing from prescription opioids (Oxys/Percs) to heavy alcohol use while learning to hide his addiction through shame and preparation. He recounts a steep decline in 2024–2025, separation from his wife, a major manic episode, and quitting opioids partly out of spite during custody concerns, followed by extreme drinking, a failed inpatient stay, and success in partial hospitalization with intensive therapy and journaling that led to writing the book. Bruce shares lessons on stigma, support, accountability, and aims to become a psychotherapist.00:00 Chaos in My Head00:51 Sober Mission and Purpose01:11 Show and Book Promo02:15 Meet Bruce Hodia03:03 Sober Date and Background04:41 Childhood Depression and Committee07:20 School Struggles and Dropping Out09:02 National Guard and Early Use12:25 Boot Camp Confidence and Masking15:23 Daily Use and Bipolar Cycles20:17 Rock Bottom and Separation25:41 Treatment Wake Up Call28:32 Therapy Tools and Journaling31:12 Writing Chaos Between My Ears31:49 Sober Career Pivot32:43 Writing for Compassion34:13 Support Systems Matter35:18 Book Structure Explained38:05 Healing Through Writing40:28 Hope for Active Addicts42:57 Reader Reactions and Grace44:43 Public Recovery and Triggers47:51 Next Books and Science49:41 Misunderstood Addiction53:35 Rebuilding After Damage55:38 Grace Without Compromise59:34 Audiobook and Where to Find01:01:30 Rock Bottom as Beginning

  4. Aug 31

    Ben: Sober Boozers Club

    From Rock Bottom to Sober Boozers Club: Ben’s Story + The Truth About NA BeerIn this episode of Rock Bottom with Ryan, Ben from the UK’s Sober Boozers Club shares how he went from daily weed use as a teen to heavy drinking fueled by late-night TV shifts, cheap lager, cocaine, and MDMA, escalating after a traumatic marriage breakdown and a toxic relationship during COVID. After a final blowup that cost friendships, he quit drinking in January 2022 and white-knuckled early sobriety, briefly using weed in the first three months to avoid relapse. Ben explains how sober Instagram helped him find community, why not everyone in recovery becomes an extreme fitness person, and how alcohol-free beer became his ritual replacement and accountability tool. He addresses misconceptions about 0.5% ABV, discusses the growing NA beer industry, shares favorite NA picks, and offers advice: if you have a problem, stop lying about moderation and get better.00:00 First Weed Memory00:38 Sober Life Isn’t Perfect01:23 Podcast Intro02:00 Meet Ben’s Story03:14 From Weed to Booze05:13 Growing Up UK07:33 Family Dynamics09:40 First Drunk and First High12:39 Weed and Early Sobriety14:55 Drinking Escalates Fast17:32 Toxic Relationship Peak21:44 Last Night Drinking25:18 Rock Bottom Decision27:00 Friends Return and Healing30:06 White Knuckling and Instagram32:23 Finding Sober Instagram33:27 Sobriety Without Reinvention35:10 Origin of Sober Boozers39:48 NA Beer Rituals41:11 Misconceptions About 0.543:12 Industry Growth and Favorites46:32 Turning Passion Into Work48:02 Building Community Over Numbers50:14 Handling Backlash and Gatekeeping52:18 Authenticity and Content Style54:21 Rapid Fire Fun Questions56:23 Sobriety Advice and Wrap Up

  5. Aug 28

    Nelson Whiting: No Limits

    Your Problem Isn’t Pornography: Hypnotherapy, Shame, and the Root Cause of Addiction | Rock Bottom with RyanOn Rock Bottom with Ryan, host Ryan interviews clinical hypnotherapist and author Nelson Whiting of No Limits Hypnotherapy about his book "Your Problem Isn’t Pornography" and how pornography, alcohol, and other compulsive behaviors are symptoms of deeper subconscious issues. Whiting explains his background growing up LDS in Utah, early experiences with hypnosis and sports psychology, and why he believes clinical hypnotherapy can produce faster, more lasting results than willpower-based approaches or traditional talk therapy. He argues many clients share a core belief of “I’m not good enough,” with shame and perfectionism fueling relapse, and describes how triggers can disappear when the internal state is reprogrammed. They discuss dopamine and the brain’s pleasure vs. goal systems, secrecy and infidelity statistics, criteria for successful change, and resources including Whiting’s website and a free copy of his book with a Positive Mind Management training.00:00 Hypnotherapy Beats Addiction01:00 Podcast Intro and Sponsor02:29 Meet Nelson Whiting04:05 Why Porn Is a Symptom06:15 Utah LDS Roots and Shame08:17 First Mind Training Breakthrough10:46 Stage Hypnosis Awakening13:48 Flow State and Subconscious Programs17:05 The Real Root Cause Not Enough21:21 Case Study Perfectionism Spiral27:23 Dopamine Goals and Brain Wiring31:09 Triggers Privacy and Marriage Fallout34:04 Shame as the Hidden Addiction38:02 Guilt vs Growth39:04 Self Love Fuels Change41:00 Affirmations and Identity44:21 Internal Healing Over Triggers48:36 Rock Bottom Motivation53:03 Honesty With Your Spouse56:04 Shame’s Biggest Lie59:51 What Freedom Looks Like01:06:06 Who Hypnotherapy Helps01:10:00 Truth Sets You Free

  6. Aug 26

    Jeanne: Naturally High

    From Rock Bottom to Naturally High: Trauma-Informed Recovery, Nervous System Regulation & The Recovery Concierge (Jeanne Foot)Ryan interviews Toronto-based addiction counselor and trauma-informed practitioner Jeanne Foot about her polysubstance use, entering recovery in August 1993 after a husband’s ultimatum, and how outpatient treatment and 12-step approaches didn’t address her childhood sexual abuse and complex PTSD. Jeanne describes feeling sober yet depressed and suicidal, relapsing while searching for healing, and later finding kundalini yoga and personal development as a path toward emotional sobriety. She explains nervous system regulation, neuroception, and how the body holds sensory memory of trauma, offering practical tools like breathwork and movement to reduce dysregulation. Jeanne outlines her integrated, neuroscience-based holistic model (somatics, epigenetics, lifestyle redesign) and her work through The Recovery Concierge, matching clients to appropriate treatment and coaching families, while challenging stigma and the “addict” label and de-emphasizing sober dates.00:00 Outpatient and 12 Steps01:02 Podcast Intro and Sponsor02:08 Meet Jeanne and Her Story03:48 Trauma Behind the Use06:57 Family Chaos and Loss09:12 Early Use and Rebellion11:58 Ultimatum and Rock Bottom14:20 Treatment Stigma and Shame16:42 Beyond Meetings to Yoga20:37 Nervous System Basics22:49 Body Memory and Neuroception24:34 Breathwork for Overwhelm27:19 Why Calm Feels Unsafe28:29 Career and Who She Helps28:44 Recovery Navigation Work29:55 Matching Treatment and Family Coaching32:57 Three Brains Explained34:19 Subconscious Beliefs and Ego37:48 Trauma and Addiction Loops40:09 Holistic Trauma Informed Model42:46 We Are All Recovering45:59 Building Recovery Concierge49:12 Daily Life Then and Now51:05 Final Advice and Wrap Up

  7. Aug 24

    Jen Hirst: Built from the Breakdown

    Jen’s Rock Bottom: Mouthwash, Adderall, Two DWIs & the Sobriety “Closet” | Rock Bottom with RyanJen from Minnesota joins Rock Bottom with Ryan to share how alcohol became her drug of choice, worsened by Adderall introduced in college, and progressed over about 10 years into severe dependence with intense withdrawals, blackouts, two DWIs, job loss, homelessness in detox, and drinking mouthwash, vanilla extract, and rubbing alcohol. She describes multiple treatment attempts, relapse cycles, and how honesty with her husband about hidden Adderall use helped her finally surrender and commit to sobriety on April 24, 2013. Jen also explains having a second “sobriety date” on September 7, 2017, when she publicly shared her recovery, leading her from Beachbody coaching into sobriety-focused group coaching and a membership community. She discusses why successful women often hide alcohol struggles, emphasizes discomfort tolerance and “play the tape forward,” and outlines six daily habits: hydration, gratitude, reading, movement, afternoon protein, and daily community check-ins.00:00 Adderall and Drinking Shift01:04 Sponsor and Show Intro02:21 Meet Jen and Sober Date05:16 Growing Up and Perfectionism08:38 First Drinks at 1510:01 Heartbreak and Adderall Seed13:09 Withdrawals and Mouthwash18:26 Secrets Surrender and Detox26:38 Treatment Relapse and Recovery29:47 Treatment and Community31:24 Coming Out Sober35:10 Building a Sobriety Coaching Career38:49 Why Successful Women Hide Drinking41:10 Six Daily Habits Framework46:56 Social Media and Burnout53:19 Compassion for Your Past Self55:40 Discomfort and One Drink Trap59:01 Play the Tape Forward Quote01:01:41 Where to Find Jen01:02:06 Final Sign Off

  8. Aug 21

    Tony - It Made Me Feel Fearless

    Tony Alexander on HIV, Meth Addiction, and Finding Recovery | Rock Bottom with RyanTony Alexander shares his story from growing up in Tulsa, Oklahoma, realizing he was gay early, and facing religious stigma, to beginning alcohol use at 12 and later using weed. After moving to Dallas to teach elementary school, stress and dissatisfaction fueled heavier substance use. In 2002 he was diagnosed with HIV, and medication side effects increased his daily marijuana use. He later lost his teaching job after testing positive for weed and moved through Austin and Atlanta, where grief after his best friend’s death contributed to trying multiple drugs and eventually crystal meth. Meth use escalated quickly into paranoia, job loss, selling and trading sex for drugs, and failed attempts at IOP and rehab. In 2018 he entered Honor Bound, committed to recovery, joined Oxford House Pride, works multiple programs and meetings, and credits sponsorship, step work, and community for long-term sobriety.00:00 Gay Bashing And Diagnosis01:19 Show Intro And Sponsor02:26 Meet Tony And Sober Date04:02 Childhood And Family06:34 Growing Up Gay In Church09:00 Coming Out To Mom15:19 First Drinks And Early Use19:32 College Party Years21:05 Bar Assault Story24:27 Teaching Stress And Weekend Escape00:34 HIV Diagnosis And Weed Use30:27 Teaching Fallout And Meth Begins33:59 First Meth Encounters34:50 Texas Return And Real High35:58 Hooked Fast At Work36:30 Hustling For The Drug38:09 Paranoia And Family Call40:12 Early Treatment And Relapse41:53 Ready For Rehab Again44:51 Facing Trauma And HIV48:22 Dream Spiritual Awakening52:27 Oxford House New Life56:36 Meetings Sponsorship Routine59:16 Dating And Relationship Work01:02:39 Advice Quotes And Farewell

See All (187)

Ratings & Reviews

4.3
out of 5
8 Ratings

About

After 18 years of drinking, countless blackouts, arrests, and hospital stays, I finally hit my bottom—and started to climb. This podcast is about what it really looks like to get sober. No sugarcoating. No step-by-step manual. Just honest conversations about addiction, recovery, relapse, and everything in between. If you’ve struggled, if someone you love is struggling, or if you just want to understand the chaos behind the bottle—this is for you. Let’s talk about what happens after rock bottom.

Information

  • Creator
    rockbottomwithryan
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    187
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © rockbottomwithryan
  • Show Website
    Rock Bottom With Ryan

You Might Also Like