Rock Bottom With Ryan

rockbottomwithryan
  • 4.3 (8)
  • MENTAL HEALTH

After 18 years of drinking, countless blackouts, arrests, and hospital stays, I finally hit my bottom—and started to climb. This podcast is about what it really looks like to get sober. No sugarcoating. No step-by-step manual. Just honest conversations about addiction, recovery, relapse, and everything in between. If you’ve struggled, if someone you love is struggling, or if you just want to understand the chaos behind the bottle—this is for you. Let’s talk about what happens after rock bottom.

  1. 10H AGO

    Carolina: A Happier Life

    In this episode of Rock Bottom with Ryan, Carolina shares her recovery story: a first-generation American Latina with a sober date of 2/18/2021 whose substance use began around ages 10–12 and escalated from alcohol and marijuana to cocaine, crack, heroin, PCP, acid, and ultimately methamphetamine. She recounts childhood physical and sexual abuse, running away, homelessness, gang-associated environments, domestic violence, arrests, trafficking drugs, and cycling in and out of prison, where she was introduced to meth and experienced psychosis. She describes profound losses, including her 15-month-old daughter Crystal’s death after Carolina blacked out and left her in a car, resulting in incarceration. Her turning point came after seeing her son’s eyes during family violence; detox, outpatient care, recovery coaching, and peer support helped her avoid a 5150 and rebuild. She founded The Happier Life Project in Riverside County to provide inclusive, harm-reduction-oriented recovery support, emphasizing meeting people where they are, family support, and multiple pathways to recovery.

    1 hr

  2. 2D AGO

    Addicted: Sadie's Comeback Story

    In this episode of Rock Bottom with Ryan, Sadie shares her recovery story: clean since November 21, 2019, originally from Georgia and now in North Carolina, with amphetamines as her drug of choice. She describes a chaotic childhood with an addicted father, emotional disconnection at home, bullying that damaged her self-esteem, and lifelong masking through invented identities. After moving to Fayetteville, she began using cocaine at 18 and quickly spiraled into 14 years of addiction, isolation, and destructive behavior. Sadie explains how prescription Adderall became her downfall, escalating to 500–700 mg a day, triggering severe psychosis, hallucinations, and total impairment. She was taken to detox, entered treatment and transitional housing, embraced NA, rebuilt relationships with her children, and now centers her life on meetings, service work, sponsorship, and daily recovery.00:00 Trauma and bravado00:53 Show intro and sponsor02:29 Meet Sadie and sobriety03:27 Family and early childhood05:55 Dad relationship and forgiveness09:29 Bullying and self esteem12:43 Reinvention in high school18:22 First high and instant hook21:29 Spiraling and isolation27:58 Adderall takes over33:51 Psychosis and hallucinations35:07 Meth Hallucinations Begin35:42 Weeks Without Sleep36:25 Tweaking And Shadow People39:06 DIY Chaos In Suburbs40:51 Detox And Lady Gaga Delusion42:32 Treatment Phases And Sober Housing43:24 Acceptance And Fellowship47:07 Rebuilding Life And Family49:55 Daily NA Routine And Sponsoring54:43 Service Work And Purpose57:42 Goals Peace And Parenting01:02:07 Advice Quotes And Farewell

    1h 8m

  3. 4D AGO

    Matthew: The Sober Life

    Ryan interviews Matthew, a UK-based psychotherapist and co-founder of Sober Life, about his progression from drinking and early substance use at 13–14 to alcohol dependence by 16 and eventually smoking and injecting cocaine by 24. Matthew describes childhood family dysfunction, severe withdrawals including seizures and hallucinations, arrests, hospitalizations, and daily use that included 10–12 liters of strong cider and heavy cocaine spending. He explains how entering a 12-step treatment center and committing to meetings and human connection supported his long detox and early recovery, leading to 12 years sober since January 19, 2014. They discuss shame-free, client-centered approaches, neuroscience and dopamine-driven cravings, practical relapse-prevention strategies, rebuilding identity, progress over perfection, and bringing recovery tools into corporate settings where substance use is common.

    54 min

  4. 6D AGO

    Chaotic Sobriety: Another Quick Sip!

    Ryan and Rachel discuss how chaos can persist in sobriety through overbooking, restlessness, and chasing dopamine, and how peace and stability can feel uncomfortable after years of addiction-driven turmoil. They reflect on self-induced chaos during drinking, the difficulty of sitting still, and how boredom and isolation can trigger overthinking and worst-case scenarios. Ryan shares frustration after injuring his back while trying to stay busy, and Rachel talks about finding a meaningful friendship and starting a new YouTube project, “Two Girls in a Chair,” as well as using quiet moments with her pets to calm her mind. Rachel also describes a recent emotional trigger involving her dad’s health and how she grounded herself by recognizing her stable life today. They advise listeners to ride out discomfort, practice calm, and trust that chaos will pass.00:00 Friendship Beyond Memes00:37 Injury Forces Stillness01:17 Show Intro and Sponsor02:54 Chaos After Getting Sober04:04 Self Induced Busy Mode06:31 Back Injury and New Plans08:06 Two Girls in a Chair10:15 Finding Real Friendships13:17 Pets and Learning to Chill15:51 Peace Feels Uncomfortable16:46 Overthinking and Meetings18:25 Gym Frustrations and Limits19:42 Isolation Spiral21:04 Healthy Alone Time21:48 Boredom In Sobriety24:54 ADHD And Restlessness26:17 Learning Stability27:16 Dad Stress And Grounding31:25 Excuses And Showing Up33:36 Ride It Out Advice35:55 Closing Encouragement

    37 min

  5. MAY 20

    Denny LaVé: A Story of Leadership and Faith

    On Rock Bottom with Ryan, Ryan and co-host Rachel Sereni interview Denny LaVé, a Montana-born Idaho entrepreneur and political candidate, about a childhood marked by family breakup, instability, poverty tied to parental substance abuse, and early exposure to pornography that shaped shame and trauma responses. Denny describes being kicked out after high school, couch surfing, and navigating college with little support, as well as later crises including a near-suicidal episode during business and marriage turmoil. He explains how building professional and spiritual support—therapy modalities like EMDR/IFS, pastoral counseling, church, exercise, and reflection—helped him begin healing and regain emotional awareness. Denny shares experiences in the Marine Corps, time in a French monastery, near-death events in construction, why he wrote a memoir to be transparent as he runs for office, and a message of identity rooted in being loved by God.

    58 min

  6. MAY 18

    Heartfelt Healing: Sonia's Story

    In this episode of Rock Bottom with Ryan, Ryan interviews Sonia, a licensed psychotherapist and first-generation Mexican American from Pomona, California, about her recovery journey. Sonia shares growing up with an alcoholic father, trauma at home, and later an abusive relationship that fueled heavier drinking and drug use, including cocaine and crystal meth. She describes a serious car accident while drinking, quitting drugs when she became pregnant in 2003, and escalating alcoholism during grad school, including drinking 12–16 beers, drinking alone, hiding bottles, and experiencing severe depression and suicidal ideation. After outpatient treatment, she found Alcoholics Anonymous, got a sponsor, worked the steps, and has been sober since 12/27/2012. Sonia discusses healing through faith, AA, and brainspotting, opening her own practice, launching the podcasts “Con Amor, Your Therapist Friend” and “Soul to Soul,” and encouraging listeners to address trauma and seek professional help.

    1h 8m

  7. MAY 15

    Jordan: From Addiction to Accountability

    On this episode of Rock Bottom with Ryan, Jordan from the Los Angeles area shares his sobriety date (July 27, 2025) and describes years of alcohol-fueled partying that often led to cocaine and other drugs. He recounts a childhood shaped by a loving, overprotective mother, an absent father who exposed him to heavy partying early, and how quitting sports in high school accelerated drug use, stealing alcohol, selling drugs, and seeking validation by supplying party favors. Jordan details toxic relationships, arrests, drinking on the job, and a suicide-attention attempt with painkillers. After extreme travel partying left him more depressed, a sober bartender brought him into AA, leading to 15 months sober before complacency triggered relapse and costly benders. Now nine months sober, he’s rebuilding trust with his 13-year-old son, staying active in meetings and church, and emphasizing commitment, humility, amends, self-forgiveness, and “replaying the tape.”

    48 min

  8. MAY 13

    Embracing Recovery: From Chaos to Clarity (Tom's Story)

    In this episode of Rock Bottom with Ryan, Ryan interviews his cousin Tom Donahoe, who shares his sobriety date (July 1, 2024), his progression from alcohol and cocaine to meth, and how family dysfunction, depression, and severe bullying and abuse from his sister shaped his self-image and fueled addiction. Tom recounts early blackouts, school failure, a Navy discharge after a cocaine drug test, a modeling career that coincided with relapses, and repeated attempts at sobriety. He describes timeshare work in Maui, relapsing into meth on his wedding day, hiding use from his wife, losing jobs, homelessness, stealing, and multiple arrests and jail time in Virginia Beach, where police nicknamed him “Spider-Man” for fleeing. He credits journaling, gratitude, meditation, meetings, rehab, and a spiritual awakening with rebuilding his life, reconnecting with his wife and daughter, and staying sober.00:00 Self Criticism Spiral01:10 Show Intro And Guest Setup02:32 Addiction Origins And Family04:23 Peer Pressure First Drink07:08 Blackouts And Early Escalation10:09 Sister Trauma And Shame14:34 School Collapse And Crank19:51 Navy Discharge Sparks Modeling24:30 LA Success Relapse Cycle27:49 Golds Gym Pills And Theft33:03 Hawaii Rehab And Timeshare35:46 Meth On Wedding Day40:16 Marriage Falls Apart40:44 Real Estate Relapse41:25 Strip Club Blackout43:18 Homeless and Meth Spiral44:57 Virginia Beach Crime Cycle47:12 Spider Man on the Run48:07 Rock Bottom and Rehab50:11 Daughter Reunion and Arrest55:29 Courtroom Miracle57:42 Dry Drunk to Spiritual Shift01:04:21 Easter Call and Forgiveness01:09:12 Self Love and Marriage Return01:14:44 Advice for Staying Sober01:18:54 Closing Quote and Goodbye

    1h 20m
See All (149)

Ratings & Reviews

4.3
out of 5
8 Ratings

About

After 18 years of drinking, countless blackouts, arrests, and hospital stays, I finally hit my bottom—and started to climb. This podcast is about what it really looks like to get sober. No sugarcoating. No step-by-step manual. Just honest conversations about addiction, recovery, relapse, and everything in between. If you’ve struggled, if someone you love is struggling, or if you just want to understand the chaos behind the bottle—this is for you. Let’s talk about what happens after rock bottom.

Information

  • Creator
    rockbottomwithryan
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    149
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © rockbottomwithryan
  • Show Website
    Rock Bottom With Ryan

You Might Also Like