Shaun “Big Red” McDonough thought a quick punt on a sure thing would make life easier – instead it cost him over $220,000, his self‑respect and almost his life. In this raw conversation, he shares how childhood poverty and violence, a “harmless” betting habit and online gambling led him to the train tracks, and how counselling, self‑exclusion tools and his daughter’s courage helped him start again. Shaun shares: Growing up in government housing with just him and his mum, surrounded by alcohol, family violence and poverty, relying on charity and support, and how that fuelled his drive to work hard, save and “do the right thing.” Leaving school early to support his mum, slowly chipping away at a mortgage, and finally being able to give his own family the Christmases he never had. How a one‑off Melbourne Cup tradition with his wife slowly normalised betting, and how an “easy” $2,000 bet on champion racehorse Winx to win $200 opened the floodgates. Losing around $220,000 over three to four years, burning through his work cover payout and dipping into his super, even while paying off the house and trying to give his family a better life. The way gambling changed his personality – lying, hiding, constantly flicking channels and phones to check races – and the damage it did to trust with his wife and daughter. Hitting rock bottom: Centrelink saying no when he had nothing left, sitting on train tracks ready to end his life, and multiple suicide attempts that even the betting company had to escalate to emergency services. His daughter’s lifesaving phone call to Gamblers Help, the years of counselling that followed, and why he still sees himself as “in recovery,” with that demon on his shoulder always tapping for one more bet. Practical tools that helped: Gamblers Help counselling, financial counselling, the national self‑exclusion register BetStop, and TAB Care to keep him out of venues and apps. Why he decided to go public with his story and now uses his lived experience to push for safer gambling laws and to stand alongside other addicts and their families. At the core of Shaun’s story is love: his relationship with his mum, how growing up in poverty and violence shaped his beliefs about money, safety and loyalty, and why he’s so passionate about helping others who were raised in the same chaos he was. This is a raw, honest, trigger‑warning conversation about gambling, secrecy, shame and suicide – but it’s also a powerful reminder that you’re not alone, and that there is a way out.