Everything Is Going To Be OK. No Option B.

Dr Hanan Bushkin
  • 5.0 (2)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

Everything Is Going To Be OK. No Option B. is a practical psychology podcast with Dr Hanan Bushkin. Honest, structured conversations on anxiety, trauma, relationships, emotional regulation, discipline, avoidance, self-respect, purpose and behavioural change. No empty motivation. Just clear psychological insight and practical steps to help you feel less stuck and live with more structure, responsibility and direction.

  1. 5d ago

    The Lies we tell ourselves

    The Lies We Tell Ourselves Most of us think self-deception means believing something obviously false. But the more dangerous lies are usually far more sophisticated. They contain truth. They contain context. They contain reasons that make sense. And that is exactly why they can keep us stuck. In Episode 19 of Everything Is Going To Be OK, No Option B, I explore the stories we tell ourselves about procrastination, fear, control, relationships, responsibility and change. Why “I’m not ready” can sometimes mean “I’m scared”. Why “that’s just who I am” can quietly become permission not to change. Why “I’ve tried everything” often means we’ve tried everything we are comfortable trying. And why a fact can be true while the story we build from it is still incomplete. This episode is about becoming more honest without becoming more self-critical. Because the goal is not to attack yourself. The goal is to see yourself more accurately. And sometimes the story that protects you today is the same story that keeps you stuck tomorrow.

    The Lies we tell ourselves

  2. Sep 29

    The most dangerous place in life is "almost"

    Almost ready. Almost changing. Almost having the conversation. It sounds close. But you can stay there for years. In this episode, I explore the gap between knowing what needs to change and actually doing something about it. Through the stories of Kodak, SpaceX, Amazon, Netflix and Nokia, we look at why the next step rarely comes with certainty — and why the cost of standing still deserves as much attention as the risk of moving. This is not a call to be reckless. Sometimes stopping is the right decision. The question is whether you are still gathering useful information, or using another round of thinking to postpone a decision you already understand. Where in your life are you living in “almost”? And what is the next informed step? Dr Hanan Bushkin — PsychologistEverything Is Going To Be OK, No Option B

    The most dangerous place in life is "almost"

  3. Sep 22

    The life you complain about

    The Life You Complain About There’s an old Jewish story about a man who cannot stand his life anymore. His house is too small, his family is too noisy, and everything feels unbearable. His rabbi gives him some very strange advice: bring the goat into the house. Things get worse before they get better. In this episode, I use that old parable to explore a difficult question: how much of our dissatisfaction comes from what is actually wrong with our lives, and how much comes from the fact that we have stopped seeing what is already good? This is not an argument for settling, lowering your standards, or becoming passive. It is about learning to hold two ideas at the same time: Be grateful for what you have. And still build something better. We look at hedonic adaptation, ambition, comparison, Jewish ideas like hakarat hatov — recognising the good — and the danger of spending your whole life improving your circumstances while becoming less able to enjoy them. Because somewhere inside the life you complain about may be the life you once prayed for. Everything Is Going To Be OK, No Option B.

    The life you complain about

  4. Sep 15

    Lindsay Clancy: understating is not permission

    The Lindsay Clancy case forces a difficult question: how do we take mental illness seriously without turning explanation into permission? In this episode, Dr Hanan Bushkin argues for a firm distinction between understanding why someone may be struggling and excusing harm done to another person — especially a child. Mental illness must be taken seriously. People need support, treatment and protection when they are unwell. But compassion cannot require us to abandon responsibility, boundaries or the protection of others. This is not a clinical assessment of Lindsay Clancy and it is not a legal opinion on her case. It is a psychological discussion about mental illness, responsibility, compassion and the line we should not erase.

  5. Sep 8

    When your mind says there is no way out

    Sometimes pain becomes so intense that it starts speaking with the authority of truth. “There is no way out.” “Nothing will change.” “No one can help.” “Everyone would be better without me.” Those thoughts can feel like conclusions. But there is an important difference between: “I cannot see a way out” and “There is no way out.” The first describes where you are standing. The second claims to know the entire future. In this episode of Everything Is Going to Be Okay, No Option B, I explore what happens when distress narrows the field of vision, why pain can be completely real without being a reliable predictor of what happens next, and why the next step does not have to be solving your whole life. Sometimes the next step is simply: Tell someone. Stay with someone. Move towards safety. Ask for help. Let another person hold perspective for a while. This episode is linked to World Suicide Prevention Day and its call to start the conversation. The message is simple: Believe the pain. Question the conclusion. If this is personal for you right now, please do not carry it alone. In South Africa, SADAG’s 24-hour Suicide Crisis Helpline is 0800 567 567. Your pain deserves to be taken seriously. But it does not get to be the sole author of what happens next.

    When your mind says there is no way out

  6. Sep 1

    What if success costs you the life you wanted

    King Midas didn’t ruin his life because he failed. He ruined it because he got exactly what he wanted. That’s what makes his story so unsettling. Everything he touched turned to gold—until he realised he could no longer eat, drink or hold anything he loved without destroying what made it valuable. In this episode, I want to talk honestly about ambition. Not about whether success matters, but about what we’re allowing it to cost us. Because sometimes we work to give our families a better life, while quietly giving them whatever is left of us. We tell ourselves it’s just a busy season. But somehow, that season keeps becoming our life. This isn’t an argument against ambition. I believe in working hard. I believe in sacrifice. But I also think we need to define success properly—and decide what the goal is not allowed to consume. Because if you gain the money, the title, the growth or the recognition, but lose your health, your marriage, your children, your integrity or your ability to enjoy your own life… Did you really succeed? Maybe not everything you touch needs to become gold.

    What if success costs you the life you wanted

  7. Aug 25

    What is a "dad?"

    A child may never know what his father protected him from. In Life Is Beautiful, a father turns terror into a game so that his son does not have to fully see the horror around him. He carries the truth. He absorbs the fear. He pays the emotional cost. That is often what fatherhood looks like. Real fathers do not always receive thanks or acknowledgement. They protect, provide and take responsibility—often at their own expense. They see the pain in their children’s eyes, carry what they can, and keep trying even when they cannot make everything better. A father cannot shield his children from every wound. But he can remain present. He can stand between them and what threatens them. He can refuse to run when being a father becomes difficult. In Episode 13 of Everything Is Going to Be Okay, No Option B, I explore what truly makes someone a dad—and why some of the deepest forms of love are found in the burdens a father quietly chooses to carry. After listening, vote in the Spotify poll: What most makes someone a real father?

    What is a "dad?"

  8. Aug 18

    When Helping is Actually Hurting

    Helping feels loving. Rescuing feels loving. Stepping in, fixing the problem, making the call, removing the consequence, taking over the task — all of it can feel like care. But what if some forms of helping actually make people less capable? In this episode of Everything Is Going to Be Okay, No Option B, I unpack the difference between supporting someone and rescuing them. Because there is a crucial psychological distinction: Support helps someone become more capable. Rescuing can repeatedly do for them what they need to learn to do for themselves. That distinction matters in parenting, marriage, friendships, leadership and almost every close relationship. A parent finishes the assignment because the child is overwhelmed. A partner makes the difficult phone call because the other person is anxious. A manager takes back the task because it is easier than watching someone struggle. The immediate problem disappears. But what happens to the person’s confidence, judgement and capacity over time? Sometimes the dependency we later complain about is partly maintained by the way we help. And sometimes we rescue people not because they truly cannot cope — but because we cannot tolerate watching them struggle. That is where the lighthouse metaphor becomes useful. A lighthouse does not deny that the ocean is dangerous. It gives warning. It gives direction. It helps the ship navigate. But it does not chase the ship into the ocean and take over the steering wheel. Healthy support often does the same. It says: I am here. Let’s think this through. And you still need to take the next step. In this episode, I explore: The difference between helping and rescuingWhy short-term relief is not always evidence that help was healthyHow rescuing can unintentionally maintain dependenceWhy distress is not always the same as incapacityHow over-helping can create resentment in relationshipsWhy some people rescue others to manage their own anxietyThe three questions to ask before stepping inHow to support someone without abandoning them or taking overThe goal is not radical independence. People need people. The goal is agency — being supported while still remaining an active participant in your own life. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is step in. And sometimes the most loving thing you can do is remain present while someone does something difficult for themselves. Because if you keep doing for people what they need to learn to do for themselves, eventually your help may become part of the problem. That is when helping is actually hurting.

    When Helping is Actually Hurting
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About

Everything Is Going To Be OK. No Option B. is a practical psychology podcast with Dr Hanan Bushkin. Honest, structured conversations on anxiety, trauma, relationships, emotional regulation, discipline, avoidance, self-respect, purpose and behavioural change. No empty motivation. Just clear psychological insight and practical steps to help you feel less stuck and live with more structure, responsibility and direction.

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