It's Not About the Alcohol

Colleen Freeland
  • 4.9 (134)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Would you like to reduce your alcohol consumption by 80 percent so you can enjoy drinking socially without relying on alcohol to manage your stress, anxiety, loneliness and boredom when you're by yourself? Most high achieving women assume over-drinking is caused by a lack of willpower--or worse, the incurable disease of "alcoholism." So they beat themselves up and avoid asking for help because they feel ashamed and out of control. Whether you're a daily drinker who can't break the habit, or you're still going to sobriety meetings even though you don't drink anymore, the real problem is that you don't trust yourself. Which means it's not about the alcohol. It's about your relationship with yourself. I'm an intuitive drinking coach helping professional women learn how drinking less (or not at all) is actually a superpower, even when the idea of giving up the only thing that helps them quiet their mind feels impossible. The solution to alcohol use disorder is a FEELING. If you felt comfortable in your own skin and at ease in your life, you would drink like someone who is comfortable and at ease! Join me each week for holistic, evidence-based strategies to fix your dopamine deficit, regulate your nervous system, cure imposter syndrome, manage sugar cravings, improve your sleep and reclaim your mental health so you no longer have the urge to escape your own body. Get happy, not sober. Because happy people don't drink themselves into a stupor.

  1. EP339 The 3 Hidden Patterns Behind Overdrinking for Busy and Successful Women

    2H AGO

    EP339 The 3 Hidden Patterns Behind Overdrinking for Busy and Successful Women

    You're not a woman who needs more information. You read the books. You follow the sober curious accounts. You've done Dry January. You've downloaded Sunnyside or Reframe. Every Sunday morning you promise yourself this week is going to be different. And here you are, still on the hamster wheel. There's nothing wrong with you. You're just trying to solve the wrong problem. This week Colleen walks through three blindspots that keep busy, successful women stuck in cycles of overdrinking. Why your identity is running the show without you knowing it. Why your refusal to slow down feels like strength. And why you can't criticize or out-think your way out of a pattern you can't see. Plus the story of teaching yoga from a chair while on bedrest with her fourth pregnancy, pushing a double jog stroller a mile and a half to the pool with four kids, and why none of this was ever actually about the alcohol. If you want a raw, real, honest conversation about what's actually going on, book a free discovery call. It's not about what's wrong with you. It's about figuring out what kind of support you actually need. Those are very different conversations.   If you see the benefit in having a private conversation with a certified coach, Click Here To Schedule A Free Discovery Call Watch The Free 45 Minute Masterclass: The science behind take it or leave it–why some women can and how you can too.    Find me on: YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer  X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

    22 min
  2. EP338 Minisode: Why You Can Explain Your Drinking But Still Can't Change It

    4D AGO

    EP338 Minisode: Why You Can Explain Your Drinking But Still Can't Change It

    In this episode, Colleen pulls apart something that sounds right, but quietly keeps women stuck: thinking about your feelings instead of actually feeling them. Because most women in this space aren't avoiding the work. They're doing a ton of it. They can explain their patterns. They understand their triggers. They know why they drink. And yet… nothing really shifts. Colleen walks through the difference between intellectual processing and physical release, and why emotional energy that doesn't move doesn't disappear… it stays in the body. That's where the tension, the anxiety, the shutdown, and yes... the cravings, come from. This isn't about more insight. It's about learning how to actually let something move through you instead of managing it in your head. And for most women, that's the part they've never been taught.   🔑 Key Takeaways ~Why understanding your emotions isn't the same as processing them ~How emotional energy gets "stuck" in the body ~Why overthinking creates anxiety, tension, and cravings ~The cultural conditioning that teaches women to suppress expression ~What it actually looks like to release an emotion (not just label it) ~Why you can't selectively numb pain without numbing joy ~A simple 3-step emotional release practice to start reconnecting with your body This episode isn't asking you to figure anything out. It's asking you to stop trying. Because the shift isn't in your thinking… it's in your willingness to feel what's already there.   If you'd like to learn more about our Emotional Sobriety Coaching programs: ---> Click here to schedule a discovery call   ---> Watch The FREE Masterclass Find me on: YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer  X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

    31 min
  3. EP337: Why drinking every night destroys your confidence (and how to stop)

    APR 14

    EP337: Why drinking every night destroys your confidence (and how to stop)

    Now that I'm on the other side of my recent slip back into drinking every night, I can see exactly what happened—and more importantly, I can explain the mechanism that makes this so dangerous for high-achieving women. In this episode, I'm breaking down why nightly drinking doesn't just affect your health—it systematically destroys your confidence, your self-trust, and your sense of who you are. And I'm giving you the exact framework for how to stop.   In this episode: Why the belief "I'll feel better when things calm down" is actually a symptom, not wisdom The mind virus that makes your brain blame everything wrong in your life on alcohol How shame disguises itself as "personal accountability" and "radical honesty" in high achieving women The reason you can't think your way out of a thinking problem (which is what this is) What actually shifted for me—and why I don't need willpower to stay sober during the week   Ready to do the work? If you'd like to to have a private conversation with a certified coach, Click Here To Schedule A Free Discovery Call Watch The Free 45 Minute Masterclass: The science behind take it or leave it–why some women can and how you can too.    Find me on: YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer  X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

    54 min
  4. EP336 Minisode: Why Giving Yourself Permission To Drink Actually Helps You Drink Less

    APR 10

    EP336 Minisode: Why Giving Yourself Permission To Drink Actually Helps You Drink Less

    In this episode, Colleen revisits one of the hardest ideas to trust at first: that before your drinking changes, you have to stop making your drinking the enemy. And yes… that can feel dangerous. Because the moment you stop restricting, judging, and trying to control yourself, your brain often swings the other direction. It sees a loophole. It tests the boundaries. It acts like the rebellious teenager who just got told there's no curfew. But Colleen explains why that doesn't mean the work isn't working. It means you're finally coming face to face with the internal conflict that's been there all along. She breaks down how restriction backfires, how your body knows when you're lying to yourself, and why the real work of emotional sobriety isn't about forcing better behavior. It's about learning how to feel the whole truth, question your programming, and rebuild trust with yourself one urge at a time. 🔑 Key Takeaways ~Why giving yourself permission can make drinking spike at first ~How restriction fuels rebellion, self-sabotage, and binge behavior ~Why your body is a better truth detector than your thoughts ~The difference between your urge and the meaning you assign to it ~Three tools to use before giving in to an urge This episode is a reminder that the goal isn't to become someone who never wants a drink, but to become someone who stops abandoning herself in the process of wanting one.   If you'd like to learn more about our available coaching programs, Click Here To Apply For A Discovery Call!   Find me on: YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer  X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

    29 min
  5. EP335: I was drinking every night again. Here's how I stopped.

    APR 7

    EP335: I was drinking every night again. Here's how I stopped.

    Colleen gets really personal in this episode. She shares the hard winter that (at one point) sent her back to nightly drinking, financial stress, the loss of her dog, feeling stuck in a house that no longer feels like home, and walks through exactly how she got out.  In this episode: Why going back to an old drinking pattern is not evidence you failed. It's data. The rat study that proves hope creates more persistence than willpower or skill ever could Why focusing on your drinking makes the pattern worse, not better Upstream thinking: what it actually looks like to increase your capacity instead of restricting your behavior The breathwork class that broke something open. And the brutal Sunday morning that followed. Observer consciousness: the difference between being in the storm and watching it Why stopping drinking didn't fix Colleen's anxiety, sleep, or low energy. And what that means for you. Do you need help? We're ready to talk to you! If you'd like to learn more about our Emotional Sobriety Coaching programs.  Click here to schedule a discovery call Find me on: YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer  X (Twitter): @NotAboutTheAlc

    39 min
  6. EP334 Minisode: Lower your tolerance without taking a break from alcohol

    APR 3

    EP334 Minisode: Lower your tolerance without taking a break from alcohol

    In this episode, Colleen pulls on a thread most women don't question: that moment where you're a drink or two in and thinking, "I'm not even feeling this." And instead of solving for it… she slows it down. Colleen walks through how easy it is to miss the actual experience of drinking when you're in your head, distracted, or slightly disconnected from your body—and how quickly that turns into pouring another one without ever really checking in. Not as a mistake. Just as a pattern. And once you start to notice it, it's hard to unsee.   🔑 Key Takeaways ~Why "I'm not feeling it" might not mean what you think ~What happens when you miss the moment the drink actually lands ~How disconnection quietly turns into overdrinking ~The difference between experiencing something vs thinking about it ~Why paying attention changes what you want next   This episode isn't asking you to do anything differently. Just… notice. Because once you do, things tend to shift on their own.   Watch The Free 45 Minute Masterclass: The science behind take it or leave it–why some women can and how you can too.  If you'd like to learn more about our Emotional Sobriety Coaching programs, Click Here To Schedule A Free Discovery Call   Find me on: YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer  X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

    29 min
  7. Ep333: Three Simple Practices To Improve Your Willpower TONIGHT

    MAR 31

    Ep333: Three Simple Practices To Improve Your Willpower TONIGHT

    You made the promise this morning,"I'm not going to drink tonight." You meant it. Then the day happened. And by 6pm, the drink was in your hand like that was the plan all along. This isn't a willpower problem. It's a capacity problem. And once you understand what's actually happening in your nervous system between 6am and 6pm, this stops feeling like a weakness or a character flaw. In this episode, I'm breaking down why evening-you can't keep the promises morning-you makes, and giving you three practices, placed at specific times of day, that actually allow you to access the willpower (you already have) TONIGHT. You'll learn: Why willpower is a finite resource — and why you've already spent it by the time you need it most Why behavioral goals ("I'm only having two") consistently fail, and how to set an emotional goal you'll actually stick to Three nervous system practices — one for morning, one for lunch, one for the transition between day and evening — that work upstream of your alcohol cravings This episode is for the woman who is tired of blaming herself for needing to relieve her stress, and who's ready to learn how to live in a way she doesn't need to escape her own life.  Resources mentioned: Watch The Free 45 Minute Masterclass: The science behind take it or leave it–why some women can and how you can too.  If you'd like to learn more about our Emotional Sobriety Coaching programs, Click Here To Schedule A Free Discovery Call

    44 min
  8. EP332 Minisode: Become Your Own Source Of Comfort (So You Don't Need Alcohol)

    MAR 27

    EP332 Minisode: Become Your Own Source Of Comfort (So You Don't Need Alcohol)

    In this episode, Colleen names something most women have never been taught to do: have a relationship with themselves. Not self-improvement. Not fixing. Not managing behavior. Actual relationship. Because when you don't know who you are, what you want, or how to meet your own needs, alcohol steps in and fills that space. Colleen walks through why so many women reach midlife feeling disconnected, uncertain, and dependent on escape—and how that's not a personal failure, it's conditioning. You were taught how to be good. You were never taught how to know yourself. And emotional sobriety isn't just about removing the drink. It's about rebuilding that internal connection so you don't need it. 🔑 Key Takeaways Why drinking becomes the default when you don't know what you want How identity gets shaped by conditioning, not conscious choice The concept of becoming both the giver and receiver of your own attention Why most relationships feel unfulfilling (and what's actually missing) How disconnection from self creates loneliness—even when you're not alone The shift from seeking needs externally → sourcing them internally Practical ways to start building a relationship with yourself If you're tired of feeling trapped and tired of drinking just to feel relief, then Click Here To Book A Call With Us.   Find me on: YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer  X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

    26 min
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About

Would you like to reduce your alcohol consumption by 80 percent so you can enjoy drinking socially without relying on alcohol to manage your stress, anxiety, loneliness and boredom when you're by yourself? Most high achieving women assume over-drinking is caused by a lack of willpower--or worse, the incurable disease of "alcoholism." So they beat themselves up and avoid asking for help because they feel ashamed and out of control. Whether you're a daily drinker who can't break the habit, or you're still going to sobriety meetings even though you don't drink anymore, the real problem is that you don't trust yourself. Which means it's not about the alcohol. It's about your relationship with yourself. I'm an intuitive drinking coach helping professional women learn how drinking less (or not at all) is actually a superpower, even when the idea of giving up the only thing that helps them quiet their mind feels impossible. The solution to alcohol use disorder is a FEELING. If you felt comfortable in your own skin and at ease in your life, you would drink like someone who is comfortable and at ease! Join me each week for holistic, evidence-based strategies to fix your dopamine deficit, regulate your nervous system, cure imposter syndrome, manage sugar cravings, improve your sleep and reclaim your mental health so you no longer have the urge to escape your own body. Get happy, not sober. Because happy people don't drink themselves into a stupor.

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